A/N: My first one shot/ficlet, orignally posted at the Livejournal community Naruto100, Carved in Stone is the original, and I hope you enjoy it. It's my first foray into the world of Naruto fanfics, and eventually, more one shots will be added, as I write them of course. Does anyone know Anbu Lady's name by the way?
Carved in Stone
Lying here, watching the rain fall, I can't help but think of you. I laid flowers by the memorial for you yesterday, as I do sometimes. Occasionally I see Kakashi there, standing quietly, but he does not often speak to me. Yet neither do I offer words to him, for we both have our painful memories locked in place and carved in stone. I trace your name on that black stone and weep inside.
Outwardly, I shed no tears. I cannot afford to cry. I merely don my mask and put up my defenses, buckling on my armor and cinching up my pain. I have a team to lead and missions to fulfill, and I have no time for grief. I slipped up in the last mission, thinking of you. I lay prone in a hospital bed, staring up at the blank ceiling. So many people died, only a few months ago now, but why did you have to be the first?
Every time I close my eyes I see you, your own eyes unclosed even in death. I see that look of horror on your stricken face and the blood, washed across the domed roof. And every time I open my eyes and wake I see your sword lying on the table there, and I can't help but clutch it to my chest.
I can still remember the academy days. I think the only reason you let me so close was the way I treated your condition. The adults tended to overemphasize it, always worrying. I know that bothered you. But the other students tried to downplay it, joking and laughing. But I let you decide whether you could keep going or not, whether something was too much. Maybe that was why we were so close.
I can still remember graduation, being assigned to cells, our first mission. We weren't in the came cell, but we kept in touch. I made new friendships, so did you, but we still met every now and then as we grew older. I smile a little remembering those talks we had, the times we shared. I especially cherish the memory of our first kiss, when you told me you had a present for my fifteenth birthday. You were so red in the face, but then again, so was I…
If you were still alive, still with me, we would wake in the morning and smile about that. Sometimes you would bring it up, and we would laugh. It really was such an awkward thing, that first kiss. You asked me to close my eyes and coughed nervously. I can't help but close my eyes and smile just thinking about it, safe beneath the hospital sheets.
Can we ever go back to those peaceful, quieter days? No, we can't go back to the first kiss, the first love. No… you're gone. But we all disappear eventually. And then, when I finally do die, maybe they'll write my name on the memorial beside yours, Hayate…