Author's Note-Whoa! I lived through the semester! Boo-yah! Finals were survived, and now that I am without any obligations of any sort, I am in full writing mode. You lucky readers you! THANK YOU all for the reviews. On a side note- One of the most amazing and thrilling feelings is getting a review from an author you love- so, just to let you writers know- You folks don't know how much you inspire me. Hope everyone had a Happy Holiday.

PS- I know that a few people have wondered if I'm planning on finishing this. Well, I really hate leaving things undone- so even if it takes me to the end of time, I am still going to end it. No worries.

PSS- On a completely different note, I got this new lotion for the Holidays that smells like Buttercream Frosting….I'm just saying, I practically ate my own hand.

General Disclaimer- In my mind….totally….In real life….not so much

Rating R/M- Have your cake and eat it too….mmmmm cake, almost as good as Buttercream Frosting….

Things Left Unsaid

Chapter 9

Resolution

Aoshi drank deeply from the tea in front of him, closing his eyes briefly at the calmness the hot drink evoked. Opening his eyes, he took in the dimly lit restaurant around him, watching the other patrons go about their daily lives. An older couple sat in comfortable silence a few tables away, while a mother and child stood at the take out counter ordering and a couple of college aged girls sipped on their coffees in a back booth. Their conversations were low and murmured. He had found the small café the second time he had taken Misao out for lunch, and it had become a haunting ground for them whenever he was in town. The atmosphere was calm, the food was excellent, and the customer service was good but not overbearing. In his mind, a perfect place to relax. Well, he supposed that others wouldn't find his demeanor relaxing, but he could feel the difference.

The person across from him shuffled in her seat, idly twirling her hot cocoa with a spoon, and Aoshi let his eyes absorb her shifting form. Her dark hair had been pulled back into a very messy braid, and she wore a sweater that barely fit her frame, falling nearly to his knees. It was one of his. She nibbled at her nails, something she had been doing for over a half an hour, and he felt her periodically glance at him from beneath the thick fall of her bang. He had tried telling her several times to stop chewing on her fingers before she ruined them, but every time just a few minutes later she would be at it again. He stopped asking her.

Aoshi supposed that she had plenty to be nervous about.

That morning when he had met Kenshin at the airport, he had met a very different person. The man's hair had been in disarray, his clothing had been wrinkled and worn, and his demeanor had been a strange mix of anticipation, determination, and impatience. Kenshin had been curt with him, but had accepted all the information Aoshi gave with a sort of greedy desperation. Seeing a man that he had infinite respect for tearing at the seams because of a woman, he had felt an equal apprehension suddenly. Misao was very slowly spinning away from him. Their relationship was as strong as it was fragile, and after seeing Kenshin the hard truth struck him like a bullet in the back.

He needed Misao, that was a certainty.

He hadn't depended on anyone for years, hadn't needed anyone for years. His subordinates knew him well, but they were not privy to his most intimate thoughts. Kenshin was like a brother, but even he didn't know everything about him. None of them saw his weaknesses. Only Misao.

He had been dismissed from Kenshin earlier, and could only think of her. He didn't know what she wanted, didn't know if she was in it for the long haul. And for some reason that aggravated him to no end. Aoshi could not see himself without Misao, she had somehow snuck in and burrowed deeply into his life. He wanted her to transfer schools, move to New York to be with him- and he wanted her to want to move.

He had finally gotten back to the hotel, thinking that after she woke up they could discuss the future. Instead he had seen her in the bathroom, bent over with a look of annoyance on her face. He had always had a thing for black. The control that had been stretched last night had finally broke, and he had acted without thought. The idea of her leaving him was just to much to handle. He was not proud of himself, or the lack of restraint he had over his actions. Aoshi had been rougher than he usually was and had done all that he could to make every sigh or gasp she uttered turn into a moan or scream of pleasure.

He felt lucky that none of their neighbors complained.

Aoshi could only count a few other times that he had acted in such an uninhibited way. He had continued until her voice had been weak, and her body boneless and trembling. Even then he hadn't stopped, Misao being eventually so overloaded that she could do little but accept the pleasure he gave to her. Aoshi had been determined to make her see how much she required him, how important he was to her. Realizing that they had a checkout time of two, he had finally relented his assault on her senses and gotten them both into the shower, packing his bag after while she napped on the bed.

Misao and him had stopped at the restaurant shortly after checking out. She'd been quiet the whole way over. He had hoped the familiar place would help to incite a conversation that was long over due. Watching her sip daintily from her mug and then begin a one sided conversation about an English class she was in, he knew that she wouldn't be the one to start it. Aoshi adored Misao, but knew that she hated thinking negatively, that she would rather eat glass than actually talk about their problems. That was just the way she was. If she wanted things to be running smoothly than her subconscious did everything it could to block out things that would be detrimental to her reasoning.

She hadn't mentioned anything about this morning or his lack of restraint. Even though he knew that Misao had to be curious about his actions. He could see that she was still tired from their earlier work out, the faint circles under her eyes a testament to that. He watched her pull at the hood of her sweater, trying unsuccessfully to hid the marks marring her neck. Eyeing the marks he grinned inwardly. He simply could not help himself. Misao's throat was long, slender, exquisite-and the noises she made while he nibbled…it was enough to drive him crazy. And of course it felt good when he left her to know that she had something to remember him by. That every time Misao looked in the mirror when he was away, she would see the marks and recall his touch. He had never thought himself a possessive man until he had met her.

Dragging his eyes away from the faint mark on her neck, he glanced up at her face. She was staring at him expectantly.

"Are you listening?"

She tilted her head prettily, furrowing her brow in a way that could only be called adorable. How could he convince her that moving was the right thing?

"I'm sorry about this morning."

He hadn't meant to say that. He hadn't planned on mentioning it at all. The unexpected words left a sour taste in his mouth. Another weakness that was only for Misao. He couldn't help himself, and it made him sick. What had she thought it? Usually a person's opinion mattered to him as little as a bothersome fly, but with her….everything was different. He cared what she thought. Misao blush a deep scarlet, shrugged her shoulders, and neck of her shirt nearly shifted off. She hastily adjusted it.

"I understand if you're mad Misao. I should have been more careful."

He had never seen Misao censure herself for him, and he was afraid of her doing it now. Would she? Trying to read the emotions on her face, he was shocked by the look of anger that was suddenly there. He guessed she really was outraged and knew it was true than. He was a disgusting person that had abused the person he cared for the most.

"No!"

Her voice was a vehement refusal. What she was refusing, he wasn't sure.

"Aoshi, don't be sorry about this morning…don't." She tugged at the end of her braid, "I couldn't stand it if you were sorry…It was….It wasn't….just don't be sorry. Okay? It was intense, yes…but it wasn't bad…not at all."

The blush on her cheeks spread down her neck. She shut her eyes in obvious embarrassment. He realized that she was trying to say something important. She always seemed stuttered when she was.

"You were very, that is….I'm not angry and…" her hands were furiously twisting the edge of her shirt. She opened her eyes and looked him directly in the eye, "It was amazing, in a very good way."

Oh. He supposed that took care of that. Aoshi could feel the very faint start of redness on his face. When was the last time he had blushed? When was the last time someone had made him feel embarrassed? He resisted the urge to look away from her. The words soothed some feathers he didn't realize were ruffled, and he let out a quiet sigh of relief. She accepted him when intense and a out of control. Did that mean that she would be receptive to all of him, parts that she probably couldn't even comprehend? He supposed there was only one way to find out.

"We need to talk."

He had never been considered a flowery speaker by those who knew him, in fact, he prided himself on it. Aoshi felt no need to beat around the bush with meaningless words. If something needed to be said, it was said. Otherwise, why would he waste his time and others by prattling on? Thank goodness Misao understood that about him. Now Misao's voice was something different. Although at times she couldn't seem to control all the words coming out of her mouth, he never felt the urge to tell her to be quiet.

Her mouth was open now. Aoshi heard the audible click as she shut it.

"What do you mean?"

Her voice had gotten very quiet, and her eyes studied her hands.

"Misao," how could he possibly phrase this? "I really have enjoyed your company over these last few months."

Eyes widening, he watched her shrug her shoulders in an over exaggerated move. He could see the forced nonchalant ness.

"I've had a good time too."

Her voice sounded dead, defeated. What could she possibly be thinking? She'd had a good time? What did that mean? That he was a good distraction? Aoshi hadn't felt so indecisive since he had been a young boy. He reached across the table and placed his hand over hers. She jumped at the sudden touch, and he watched her eyes find his reluctance.

"We can't continue like this."

He hadn't meant for his words to sound so definite. He hadn't meant to sound so uncompromising. Aoshi just knew that she had to be aware that this long distance relationship couldn't continue forever. It trapped them in a middle stage and prevented their relationship from growing. And he couldn't maintain being with her on such a small scale.

Her mouth opened again, and Aoshi could see the emotions racing across her face.

"Well, I know what you mean, but I thought that you were having a good time, and I thought that you liked being with me, and that you …you…cared about this, but then again I guess if you don't think that this, that is…that this is working…then…then I…I-"

He listened to her babble, attempting to make sense of her words. Aoshi felt her pull at her hand under his, and he tightened his grip. She was obviously more frazzled than he had previously thought. Deciphering her words, he felt his heart clench. Did she think he was breaking up with her?

"Maybe I should just go Aoshi…I…I don't want you to feel like you need to hang out with me if you don't want to, that is…I don't want you to, I just thought…"

She was close to tears and pulling desperately at her hand. Damn it all. How could he make an already difficult conversation even worse?

"Misao I don't want you to leave."

She had turned her head away from his, and he could see her shoulders trembling.

"Really Misao, I want you to stay with me."

And that was the truth more than he thought possible. He wanted her to stay with him. Not just in the restaurant, not just for the weekend…he wanted her to stay by his side always.

He let out a frustrated breath and ran his hand through his hair.

"Misao, I want you to move to New York."

There he had said it, in the easiest and most straight forward way. Like he should have done in the first place. He scrutinized her reaction, watching her eyes widen and her body still. Aoshi had put it all out there- he had said exactly what he wanted. The question was, what did she want? He had thought her dedicated, but what if she wanted something different then he did?

"What?"

Her voice was high pitched and squeaky. It was actually pretty cute. He did hate repeating himself however.

"I want you in New York."…with me. He didn't voice the thought aloud, "I'll help you find a new school, a place to work, and an apartment."

He wanted her with him in his home, warming his bed and lighting up his everyday life, but understood that for her it may still be a bit soon. She was only twenty, and still a child in many ways- The world was still a big place full of great things. Her body was tense, and he noticed that she was no longer attempting to remove her hand from his.

"What?"

She seemed to be still stuck at the beginning of the conversation.

"You want me…in New York?"

Her voice was still shaking slightly. She was watching his shoulder, seemingly unable to look him in the eye.

"Why Aoshi?"

He barely heard the words come out of her mouth. Why? She wanted to know why? How could he express the amount of need he had for her? How could he possibly show her how much her presence calmed and soothed him? He swallowed.

"I need you with me."

As soon as he said the words, he heard repeated back to him the whispered phrase she had spoken earlier. Aoshi, I need you. Did she feel what he felt? Was it too soon to say that he thought he was in love with her? Aoshi couldn't say the words yet, hadn't said them in too many years too count. She looked flabbergasted.

"Really?"

He had always known that the distance put a strain on their relationship, but he had never been able to see just how deep it ran until now. Misao didn't think that he needed her, didn't know that his blood burned for her. She was insecure in their relationship, and knowing how little he expressed himself, he couldn't blame her for her insecurity. He took a long swallow of his rapidly cooling tea.

"Yes Misao, I do need you."

"New York? But that is so far away…and school…and family...and…and…"

She seemed to be talking to herself, and Aoshi could see the closed off expression on her face. He felt a sinking feeling of trepidation in his gut. He had said that he needed her, said that she was important. Would that be enough? Aoshi wasn't sure he could say much more. He was asking her to make a big change for him, a huge change for him. And now that he had admitted that she was needed, would that demonstration of weakness be his undoing? And even if she initially said yes, he couldn't let her move and become more involved with him without a deeper explanation of his work. He did not move in the same circles that ordinary people did. He hadn't for years. Could she accept the violent and cold side of him?

He put enough cash for the meal, a tip, and a cab ride for Misao on the table.

"Think about it Misao, and call me if you want to talk. There's been a change of plans so I'll be in town for the next few days. There are more things we need to discuss." He stood up and slid a scrap of paper in front of her, "Here's the number you can reach me at if my cell is off."

She didn't acknowledge him, and Aoshi could practically see her mind churning. Misao would call…wouldn't she? Shrugging on his coat, he leaned forward, and kissed her on the cheek, breaking his own unspoken word on public displays of affection. She turned into his touch, and he let his lips meet hers in a chaste kiss.

Leaving her sitting in her chair, he headed out of the restaurant-the vision of Kenshin's broken form suddenly in his mind. He wouldn't be like that, wouldn't allow Misao to slip through his fingers. Although he was giving her some space to think, Aoshi wasn't going to give her up without a fight. Whether Misao knew it or not, Aoshi was not going to roll over and let her leave.

Even if it killed Aoshi, he would see Misao in New York.

Kenshin ghosted down the street, his attention honed in on the woman in front of him. There was a bite in the air, and both of their breaths came out in small cloudy puffs. The street itself was half filled with people going about their lives, at just after seven the work rush was finally over. He slipped easily between those on the street, his body barely needing to register the people around it. They didn't even look twice at him. Turning the corner she had just turned, he watched her shiver and pull her sweater closer. He frowned at her obvious discomfort. Although he was without a coat, he barely noticed the chill. He should have made sure that Kaoru had taken a coat with her when she had left earlier. She paused under a street light, the tired slump of her shoulders a dead give away to the exhaustion she felt. Kenshin stayed out of her eyesight, unsure of how she would react to him.

He had hoped that after she got off of work they could finally get to the bottom of their situation. In the best case scenario they would have not only worked out their kinks, but she would have allowed him to introduce himself to her body again. Something that he was dying to do. However, he had glanced in at her in work and the place had been swamped. Dressed as a pirate, she had practically been running from table to table, eye patch and all. Stray hairs had stuck to her face, and her cheeks had been flushed with exertion. Seeing her after work doubly confirmed it, she wouldn't be up to any sort of conversation tonight. He wasn't even sure if she would be comfortable with him nearby. She was still confused and easily excitable when it came to Kenshin, and he realized that a more stealthy approach may be best.

It was aggravating, incredibly infuriating. He had finally figured out her reason for leaving, but was stuck with just his point of view. Had Kaoru left because she had been injured and was afraid of getting hurt again? No, he couldn't imagine her leaving for that reason. And what had that disgusting brute whispered cruelly into her ear? He needed answers.

Kaoru ducked down into her street, and he pursued. Now wasn't the time to be letting his mind wander. Glancing behind her at the sudden noise of a vehicle passing, Kenshin stepped into a side alley to avoid her sight. Hearing the door to her apartment complex open then close, he exited the side street and continued to her building. A newspaper blew across his feet as he reached the door, and ignoring it he entered the building after her. The place was still as shabby as he remembered.

Pausing a few doors away from hers, he halted his footsteps. Shaking his head at his own behavior, he couldn't help but contradict himself. Here Kenshin was outside of her door, even when he knew that she wasn't up to visitors. Especially not him. Rubbing at his temple, he battled his own resolve. What was he supposed to do? Kaoru was tired, exhausted. But in that condition leaving her to her own devices was simply unacceptable. She was no longer alone, he wouldn't allow her to face her demons by herself. He was in it for the long haul, for better or worse. The sooner she realized that, the better.

Now was not the time to back off, not when he was so close.

Putting up a hand to knock on her door, he paused with it half way raised. After this morning who knew if she would even answer her door. Especially if she wasn't expecting anyone. There was no need to alert Kaoru to his presence before it was necessary. Bringing his hand to the doorknob instead, he grinned at its locked state. Even though she was living in a wretched neighborhood she still had the smarts to lock her door. Picking the lock easily, he promised himself that she wouldn't have to fear a break in every again.

Cracking open the door, he stepped inside and closed it quietly behind him. The lights in the kitchen and living room were off. Slipping off his shoes, he listened to the apartment attempting to figure out exactly where Kaoru and Kenji were. The sound of a shower running was audible in the background, and as he went deeper into the apartment he noticed a glow coming out from beneath Kaoru's bedroom door. Peeking through a small crack in the slightly ajar door, he spotted a red head snuggled up underneath the covers on Kaoru's bed, the television displaying an eerie glow in the otherwise unlit room.

He watched Kenji stifle a yawn, his small hands fisting themselves in the blankets. Unable to not smile at the picture his son made, he walked into the room with the grin still in place. The abrupt movement had Kenji's head turning, and Kenshin immediately spoke up to soothe the child.

"Hey Kenji, it's me Kenshin, remember me?"

It wasn't the most clever phrase he had spoken, but he hoped the child wouldn't cause a scene. His own son thinking of him as a burglar or bad guy was simply unacceptable. He sat down on the edge of the bed as Kenji pulled himself out of the covers and into a sitting position. The boy nodded his head at Kenshin's words even as he rubbed at his eyes. A worn stuffed animal of a cat rested next to him. Kenshin felt his smile grow at the picture in front of him. Kaoru was obviously in the shower.

"How was your day Kenji?"

He moved backwards deeper onto the bed, allowing his back to rest on the wall. Kenji moved up next to him, curling up near him. Wrapping his arm around the young boy's shoulders, he watched Kenji adjust himself so that he was resting against him.

"It was okay. Mary and me played Chutes and Ladders, and then we finger painted, and then we had sandwiches, and then after that we watched Aladdin, we also ate macaroni for dinner and she made the spiral kind, and then Mom came home. She's showering and then she promised to read me a story."

He didn't pause in his quick words, and Kenshin attempted to process the long sentence from the sleepy child. At full charge the kid was probably positively a bundle of energy. Kenji burrowed deeper into Kenshin's side, pausing briefly to pull the stuffed kitty closer.

"I wish Mommy could have spent the day with me."

The boy's voice was quiet against his frame, and Kenshin couldn't help but run a hand through his son's messy hair.

"I know."

And he did. Kaoru may have been working for money so that Kenji and her could survive, but that didn't change the truth. She was missing out on parts of Kenji's life, and he was getting to the age where he noticed. Kaoru surely realized that she had an exceptional son, a son that was intelligent and comprehending at such a young age.

"Mommy still likes me right?"

Kenji's voice was quiet in the dark, and Kenshin felt his body still at the child's seriousness. He pulled the boy closer to him. Despite all his smarts, Kenji was still a young boy that desperately loved his mother, and needed assurances that she really did care for him- Especially because she had to be away so often.

"Your Mom likes you more than anything else." Kenshin knew without a doubt that she did, "She just has to work a lot so that you guys can have all the nice things you do. She takes care of you."

Looking down at Kenji, the kid stared back up at him. Kenshin could see the relief that his words had brought to the child. He tugged at one of the ears on his stuffed animal.

"I like you."

The words were plain spoken and soft, but Kenshin heard them none the less. Kenji liked him. He felt like he was walking on cloud nine.

"I like you too Kenji."

Grinning up at Kenshin, the boy turned his head and rested it against Kenshin's forearm.

"Do you like my Mommy too?"

Though the words were innocent Kenshin could feel his heart beat speed up. He was having a conversation with his son. His son liked him. His son was nestled next to him and slowly drifting to sleep. Kaoru and him had produced a son, and she was in the other room. It was something that had been unimaginable only days before.

"I do."

More than liked. He was obsessed with Kaoru, he loved her. It ecstasy just to share the same air with her.

"Mommy takes care of me because she likes me, right?" The poor kid was practically talking in his sleep, "Does that mean that you are going to take care of Mommy from now on?"

Kenshin's mind turned over the child's simplified logic. It was obvious that the boy cared desperately for his mother, that he was worried about her and wanted to take care of her. But Kenji seemed to recognize that he wasn't nearly strong enough to do so. Kaoru took care of him, and because Kenji couldn't take proper care of her- he needed to find someone to do so that he approved of. At such a young age, Kenji was amazing, and Kenshin couldn't have been more proud.

"Not just your Mom, Kenji. I want to help her take care of you too, if that is alright with you."

Kenji murmured his assent, even as he finally succumbed to dream land. Holding the child close to him, he rubbed the boy's shoulders and half watched the flickering television. He had been worried for a while that Kenji wouldn't accept him, that his son would instead decide to hate him. It was a fear he had never voiced, but one that had worn him down more than he thought that it had. It felt good to know that Kenji liked him. And with time and bonding, he was hopeful that it would grow into love.

A family. Kenshin was so close to having Kaoru back, to gaining a son. He just needed to work through Kaoru's stubbornness. And sitting there with his child resting against him, he felt his already unshakable resolve harden further. Kaoru was his, Kenji was their son, and nothing she did or say would change that.

He heard the shower turn off and did his best to clear his suddenly muddled thoughts. Finding himself suddenly very tired he leaned his head back against the wall and waited for Kaoru to emerge. She would undoubtedly be angry as hell, and he hoped the sleeping child would curb her more vicious words and actions. She was beautiful though when she was angry, her cheeks flushed and her eyes flashing. Fuck, who was he kidding? He couldn't think of one instance that he hadn't found her enchanting. It was true then, and it certainly was true now.

The facet turned on and he muffled a yawn that tried to creep its way out of him. He hadn't realized he was so drained. Kenshin had done some running around for work while she was on shift, but he hadn't thought he'd over exerted himself. No fights, no broken bones, no need to get…serious, the branch he'd worked with had been cooperative and friendly. He wasn't still jet lagged was he? It didn't feel like jet lag. Then again…he hadn't really slept in the last twenty four hours since discovering Kaoru's whereabouts. Kenji shifted in his sleep and Kenshin used the movement as an excuse to settle himself into a more comfortable position. Giving up the fight to keep his eyes open, he allowed them to close.

Unaware of the facet shutting off, or the bathroom light following suit as the door opened, he lay in the comfortable space between wakefulness and slumber. Jerking out of his nearly restful state, he heard Kaoru's intake of breath at the sight of them curled up on her bed. Instead of harsh words at his sight however, he was pleasantly surprised when she didn't voice any sort of complaint. No sharp slaps or crude profanities.

Hearing her footsteps as she crossed the room toward them, he didn't move. How would she react? She was likely to think that he was asleep, how would it change her actions toward him? He was anxious to gain a better understanding of her thoughts. She loved him, yes…but a person could also feel anger and other emotions toward the same individual they cared for. He needed to know all that he could, and was more than willing to use that information to his advantage. The edge of bed dipped as she sat on it, and Kenshin tried not to lean into her touch when he felt her hand brush away his bang. Her skin felt amazing against his, and he unconsciously drew up the memory of the two of them earlier in her bedroom. She had been so soft, so pliant, so eager. Still feigning sleep, he took a calming breath.

Her hand removed itself, but the weight on the bed remained, and he realized that she was situating herself for sleep as well. He wasn't sure what she could be thinking, but at the moment he didn't care. Although a rather tight fit, he felt himself smile inwardly at the picture they made with Kenji between them.

He knew without needing to open his eyes that they looked like a family. And he would fight tooth and nail to make it true.

AN: YEAH! Chapter 9 is done! Chapter 9 already? Wow, time sure flies. This Chapter gave me a bit oftrouble, I guess you could say that I am more comfortablewriting shorterfics than long ones.I tend to get muddled. One of my New Year's resolutions for 2006 is to update once a month, so I will do my best to keep on track and on schedule. Again, thank you all for your lovely reviews- and feel free to leave me one for this Chapter. Whether it is your first or your fifteenth review, every one is read and appreciated.

NEXT CHAPTER- Kaoru discovers a certain someone in her bed (wink), Yahiko attempts to fix his permanently mussed hair, and Misao tries to do some serious thinking while dressed as a cave woman.