Last Rites by UndyingShadows

Chapter three

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Teen Titans or any of the characters locations or objects herein.

Raven

It's a relief to see Beast Boy out of his room, but he hasn't exactly said anything to make me stop worrying.

Besides that, he looks horrible. He's a fair bit thinner than usual - which is saying something - his eyes are bloodshot, with black bags underneath them and he seems to be having trouble breathing. He's also quite pale, in a green kind of way.

Why is he lying to me? Doesn't he trust me?

That is not the case. Can you not feel it? He is afraid.

He's...afraid of me?

Perhaps. However I suspect that, in this instance, he is afraid of...something not linked to his fear of you.

That's not very comforting.

I see no point in telling you falsehoods.

He is afraid. I can feel it.

But it isn't just fear. There's sorrow and...regret? I don't know.

Most people think empathy is easy.

It isn't, with anyone. Especially not Beast Boy.

Not many people can force themselves to be happy. They may be able to convince others, but it's almost impossible to fool yourself

Beast Boy...he can do that. If he needs to be happy, then he can be. That means that he's either so simpleminded that he can forget whatever is upsetting him in a second and cheer up, or he's spent so long forcing a smile, hiding his true feelings, lying to himself that it has become second nature.

I happen to know that Beast Boy isn't as stupid as he wants us to believe.

That makes this even worse. I've known Beast Boy for a long time. I've felt his rage, sorrow and joy. Never have I felt such...hopelessness.

If he doesn't want my help, I have no right to force it on him.

That isn't going to stop me.

I'm not going to let him walk away from here feeling this way, if I can do something about it.

Not when he has done so much for me.

He's looking at me now, and he looks worried. There's no hint of a smile, no sparkle in his eyes.

When he speaks, his voice is quiet.

"If I tell you, Raven, you have to promise me you won't tell anyone, no matter what happens."

Does he really think that I would tell everyone else whatever he's trying so hard to hide?

All I can do is give him my word.

"I swe -" He interrupts me, hanging his head.

"And...You've gotta promise you won't treat me any different."

Huh. Is it just me or is that kinda a strange thing to say?

That doesn't matter.

I reach out, and make him look me in the eyes.

"I swear to you, I won't treat you any differently and I won't breath a word."

I can only hope he believes me.

Apparently he does. He gives me a sad smile and rises, heading outside.

I follow him.

Beast Boy

It took a long time, but I told Raven my story.

As she sat on the rock beside me, gazing out over the grey sea I told her about Africa, my parents, sakutia...how I let them die...

I'm almost finished, now, but the next part is the most difficult of all.

But I have to say it, because if I don't I will have lied to her.

I got sick of lying a long time ago.

I wonder...does she look sad? I don't have the guts to look at her. I doubt it. Raven isn't exactly one to let things get to her.

She hasn't said a word...maybe she knows that if she interrupts, I won't be strong enough to finish.

Maybe she just doesn't know what to say...or maybe she doesn't care.

It doesn't matter. She's here, listening.

I try to keep my voice level, so that I don't break down.

"Rae...my parents didn't expect to die..."

Woah...I'm really good at stating the obvious, huh?

"Sakutia...I told you that it's fatal..."

I have to stop here, and wipe away a tear. How does Raven do this all the time?

"My parents...they gave me a cure, they saved my life..."

Just a little more to say, then I can go back to my room and wait.

"But it wasn't a permanent cure...it kept me alive a bit longer...almost seventeen years, in fact."

I can't fight the tears, anymore. So I just let them come. I won't let it stop me finishing...

"I...always knew that I wasn't gonna live very long, Rae...they told me that, without more medicine...I'd die."

I stand up and turn towards the tower.

"I always hoped that they were wrong. They weren't...i'm dying, Raven...I might live a few hours or weeks, but i'd say a month at the most."

She might have said something, then. I didn't hear her - I don't want to hear what she wants to say, now.

"Guess now you know why i've been a little down, lately, huh? Sorry about that."

I can't face her, now. I'm going inside.

Back to my little play.

End of chapter three.