Title: A Mighty Wind
Author: Singing Wind
Spoilers: None
Rating: K
Category: S, MT, UST, A, MSR, BFF, etc.
Archive: you want it, you got it.
Disclaimer: Chris Carter might have created Mulder and Scully and Fox might own them, but they belong to the courageous David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson who gave them life and meaning and us, the fans.
Summary: Mulder feels sick after a case.

They're all talkin' 'bout a feeling,
'Bout a taste that's in the air,
They're all talkin' 'bout this mighty wind,
That's blowin' everywhere.

A Mighty Wind - Levy, Guest, McKean

Special Agent Dana Katherine Scully, M.D. with FBI was driving her partner, Special Agent Fox William Mulder, also with FBI, to the airport because they were finished another case. He had always loved to kid her that he was surprised her little feet could reach the petals, but this time he was glad. He was feeling sick.

He clutched his belly and groaned inwardly. He didn't want Scully to know that he wasn't the big-macho man he imagined he thought she was.

He groaned inwardly again. The pain would not let up. It was getting worse.

Worse.

So worse.

He doesn't know how much more he could take.

He had thought it could be gas from the chili cheese dog he insisted they stop for before they left. He thought if he could just let it out he'd maybe feel better, but he didn't want to stink up the car with Scully in it. So he was holding it. But it was causing him so much pain to hold it in.

He silently mused that maybe if he held in for too long he maybe his butt might freeze that way; or that he might miss his chance like Kramer had on the TV show, "Seinfeld". Mulder couldn't stifle his giggle, which caused his tummy to unclench and he let a little out. It came out a high-pitched squeak, like when you let air out of a balloon but you stretch the opening of the balloon as the air escapes.

"Mulder?" Scully said with curiousness. "Did you hear that?"

"What, Scully? I ...uh...I was almost asleep? What is it that you are saying now?"

"I thought I heard a noise."

"Well, why don't you turn the radio on?"

"That's a great idea, Mulder! Thanks!"

Scully turned on the radio to a light contemporary adult station. She settled back into the driver's seat, but then began to sniff the air.

Mulder took this opportunity to cover for himself, and beat her to the punch by saying, "Ugh, Scully! Did you run over a skunk?"

"No, Mulder. I think I'd have known if I had run over a skunk. Must be something in the air."

Just then, the song, "She's Like the Wind" from the movie Dirty Dancing came on the radio.

"Ooooh, I love this song, Mulder. Do you mind if I sing along?" (It brought her right back to med school days where she and her roommate watched Dirty Dancing almost over forty times.)

"Huh? What are you saying? No, uh...okay, Scully." Mulder was barely aware of what Scully had been saying anymore. The pain was getting to be excruciating painful.

Scully seemed to take Mulder's answer as acceptance and began to sing tone deafeningly:

I feel her breath on my face,
Her body close to meeee
Can't look in her eyes,
She's out of my leeeeague
Just a fool to belieeeeeve
I am anything she needs
She's like the wind.

Mulder couldn't hardly believe Scully was singing about wind. He could barely stand it. Mulder's innards felt like they were twisting inside his body like a twist tie around a Glad® garbage bag.

Mulder began to whine in pain, "EEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeee."

However, Scully thought that he was singing along with her, so she smiled and sang louder, feeling encouragement from Mulder.

Now Mulder's guts and his ears hurt.

"STOP!" Mulder commanded.

Scully looked offended. Unshed tears pooled and welled in her icy, crystal clear, oceanic blue eyes. Mulder rolled his hazel-green-brown, flecked with gold eyes.

"No, Scully, I'm not yelling at you. Well, I am yelling at you, but not because I want to yell at you. I'm yelling at you because I'm in pain, Scully. So very much pain."

Scully looked shocked as this was the first she'd heard about Mulder being in pain. He'd done a good job at pretending; so she didn't really believe him.

"Scuh-lleeeeeeeeeee," Mulder whined again, hugging himself in pain, "it hurrrrrrrrts!"

"Oh my God, Mulder, I'm shocked. I hadn't any idea you were in so much pain. What's wrong?"

Quickly, after checking her blind spot, and blinking her blinker for 2.5 seconds, Scully pulled over onto the right gravel shoulder of the road.

"Thanks Scully. I...I gotta go!"

Mulder thought he heard Scully ask: Mulder, where are you going? But Mulder didn't have the time or inclination to answer. He opened up the passenger door to the car and tumbled out. He tried to run to the nearby field, but every step he took stabbed a pain into his intestines, so with every step he took, he couldn't help but release a little toot. He sounded like a whoopee cushion that was being punched lightly but repeatedly.

He turned around when he figured out he was far enough away. He was mortificated to find Scully had been following him.

"No! Scully! Go away! What did you hear? Just go!"

"No, Mulder! I heard everything! I understand now."

"You do?"

"Of course I do. Remember? I'm a medical doctor! Your condition right now is due to flatulence. It's a mixture of gases known as flatus produced by bacteria and yeasts in your gastrointestinal tract. The gas is released under pressure through the anus and is often accompanied by odor and sound. The gas you're most likely having difficulty with right now is known as endogenous gases which are produced by digesting food that are high in polysaccharides like beans, lentils, milk, onions, radish, sweet potatoes, cheese, broccoli, cabbage. Beans also have oligosaccharides, which are a kind of carbohydrates that resist digestion. They pass through the upper intestine basically unchanged, and when they reach the lower intestine, bacteria feed on them, producing copious amounts of flatus. So, it's probably that chili cheese dog you ate at lunch. I told you that it would give you a tummy ache, but no --"

"Scully! Now is not the time for 'I tolds you sos'!"

"No, of course not! Oh my God! I'm so sorry! Listen to me, Mulder. I'm going to get you through this. It's okay, everybody farts sometimes, just hold on -- oh, wait, no. I meant just let go."

"Do you mean it, Scully?"

"Of course I do, Mulder. I care about you...deeply. A little gas from a chili cheese dog isn't going to change all that."

"Do you mean it, Scully?"

Scully wondered if the gas was making Mulder stupid. "Yes, Mulder. Do I have to spell it out for you? I've. Loved. You. From. The. Day. I. First. Walked. Into. The. Basement. Office."

"I had had no idea you felt that way, Scully," said Mulder, who doubled over in so much pain.

Scully took Mulder's hands. "I feel the same, but I can't bare to see you in such pain. You have to let it out or I'm worried you may pass out."

"Okay. Okay. Scully. I'm going to... Thank you. Thank you for understanding. You're so--"

Mulder was interrupted by a loud BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP that came from his backside.

"That's good Mulder! Push!"

BRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP

"You're so wondrous, Scully!"

BRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAP. Mulder groaned outwardly this time.

He was already starting to feel much better. "I'm feeling much better. But I think I've got one more," he said strainingly.

"Okay, squeeze my hands, Mulder...Concentrate! You can do it!"

BRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP

With that finale release, the both collapsed to the ground. Scully pulled Mulder into her arms for a tender hug.

"I knew you could do it, Mulder!"

"I couldn't...have...done it...without you," Mulder said breathlessly between pants. He was talking like that kid Stevie on that show "Malcolm In The Middle"."

"I know."

"Did you mean everything you said, Scully?" he asked as he reached up to finger her sun-kissed auburn tresses.

"Yes, Mulder, after all we've been through, a little gas isn't going to change how I feel."

"Me too, Scully. But that wasn't a little gas...that was..."

Scully intuitively knew what he would say next, so Mulder and Scully together said, "...A Mighty Wind." They loved that movie too.

Then both of their faces lit up at each other like the most beautiful flare from the biggest flare gun, or like the most marvellous glow from the elements on a toaster when they've finally heated up enough. Because they finally knew they were secure and warm and loved in each other's feelings and exquisite love. They would never again have to know the bitter cold loneliness that had been plaguing their lives before that fateful day when Scully walked into Mulder's basement office because they now knew that their loves were requited.

"Oh, Mulder. I love you, Fox William Mulder."

"And I you, Dana K. Scully." They moved closer to one another as their luscious lips reached for each other's and joined unanimously in a gentile kiss.

Then they walked back to the car which was still on the gravel shoulder of the road hand in hand, softly humming "She's Like The Wind".

end

Author's Notes:
This story was started on July 14, 2006 at 10pm and finished on July 14, 2006 at 11:15pm. I hope I enjoyed writing this story as much as you enjoy reading it -- please let me know if and when you did! This is only my second ever fanfiction story. And I hope to write more again. I wrote a previous story under another name but that didn't seem to be very popular so I will try this name and hopefully it will help you to like my stories more.

This story is a "Mulder Torture" story. That means that Mulder is in some kind of physiological or psychological or mental pain. This is my first ever Mulder Torture story that I'd ever written before. They seem popular and I wanted to try it and make a challenge of myself. I think I did that.

I had tried to write about something I'd experienced before. I've had very bad gas before and it was hell. The information about flatulence came from Wikipedia I had never known the causes of flatulence until I had decided to write this story. I'm glad I know now. I've learned so much.