She silently pulled herself out of Craig's embrace, slowly crawling off of the bed. As she stepped lightly off the bed, she heard him mutter something and roll over.
She padded to the bathroom, where she washed her face and finger-combed her hair. Looking at herself in the mirror, she noticed that she wasn't completely disgusted with what she was seeing.
She pulled the t-shirt's collar down, examining the cut on her collarbone. It had been opened during the night, and more pockets of blood had collected and dried. Sighing, she got out a washrag and gently scraped at it until it was clean. After foraging around the cabinets a bit, she came upon a bottle of peroxide. Holding a rag to catch the runoff, she poured some of it directly on her wound.
The tingle was not unlike that of the initial rush after a good hit off of some coke. It was a quick, rushing tingle that felt cold all over one second, then a wave of warmth would spread through your body. But this was a mere disinfectant, and it did not follow up with a gentle warming sensation, or a rip-roaring good high.
She glanced up at the sound of footsteps, and through the open door, she saw Joey. She flushed; she was embarassed. Although she knew he most likely understood, the entire ordeal from the night before and what she knew Craig had told him still made her ashamed. She wondered whether or not he had gone through with telling her mother.
After the disinfectant had done its job, Ashley tiptoed from the bathroom, attempting to enter the kitchen unseen and unheard from anyone in the Jeremiah household.
"I made some eggs, Ashley."
She spun around, instantly cursing herself for not seeing him. Joey was seated neatly at the kitchen table, eating toast and eggs with a cup of coffee. He smiled at her; she couldn't really manage a smile -- although she did turn a nice shade of red.
"You feeling okay today?" His brow knit with concern. "Your mom said to call her when you woke up. Want me to?"
"No, it's okay. I can do it." She shook her head lightly, her hair swaying en masse.
He nodded in agreement, taking a bite of his toast.
Joey let out a small sigh, and no more was said of the matter.
Once she had poured herself some milk, she sat across from him at the small kitchen table, in complete silence. The awkward tension was palpable.
The tension was broken as Craig stumbled dazedly into the kitchen, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. As his eyes glanced upon Ashley, she could see his mind registering the events of the past night, recalling why his ex-girlfriend was sitting at his kitchen table in his clothes.
"Shouldn't you be calling your mom, Ashley?" Joey said, his light suggestion more of a direct command.
After calling her mom, Ashley had retired to Craig's room to await the imminent arrival. She lay on his bed, sprawled out, staring blankly at the ceiling. Craig's stereo played the Phantom Planet album she had given him last holiday -- she couldn't remember which one specifically. She hummed along to "In Our Darkest Hour", her fingers twitching in rhythm to the music. She closed her eyes lazily, falling into the chorus.
Her eyes shot open at the sound of a creaking floorboard.
"Oh, you're awake?" Kate's voice broke through the track. "I was trying to be quiet -- you looked asleep."
Kate stepped into the room and sat on the edge of Craig's bed. Ashley made no move to sit up or make eye contact. Her eyes were fixed on a tiny mildew stain on the ceiling.
Her cheeks grew hot as the silence settled between them. She bit her lip to keep from crying; she tasted blood, the tears already pooling. She tried to blink them away, but they came faster.
"Honey..." Kate's voice wavered as she leaned down and held her daughter, who began crying softly into her shoulder. "Shh, don't cry, don't cry. Momma's here."
Kate pulled her up and sat there, rocking Ashley's near limp form as the thin girl sobbed. She whispered words of comfort, kissing her forehead. Ashley continued to cry.
"M-Mom, I-I..." Ashley stuttered as she tried to keep from sniffling.
"Shh, honey, shh. It's alright." Kate hushed her softly.
"Mom, what am I going to do?" Ashley cried, burying her head in her mother's shoulder.
"I don't know, honey." Kate whispered, stroking Ashley's hair. "But you've got to see a doctor. I made you an appointment for you in half an hour."
Ashley cried even harder as she thought of the humiliation.
"Mom, I can't go to the cops..." She whimpered. "He'll kill me..."
"I won't let anything happen to you," Kate said boldly.
When they arrived at the doctor's office nearly an hour later, Ashley was a wreck. She had been crying on and off since Kate had picked her up. She hadn't bothered to change clothes or brush her hair; she still wore Craig's clothes and her hair stuck out in random places.
The doctor, a tough-looking middle-aged woman, ushered Kate and Ashley back to an examination room.
"I'm Dr. Watts, and you are..." She scanned her clipboard, "Ashley Kerwin?"
Ashley nodded, hoisting herself onto the examination table.
"What seems to be the problem, Miss Kerwin?" Dr. Watts twiddled with the stethoscope around her neck.
"I was raped last night." Ashley whispered, staring at the ground.
Dr. Watts paused for a moment, glancing from Kate to Ashley.
"First, I can offer you a rape kit." Dr.Watts said, adjusting her glasses.
Kate glanced at Ashley and nodded her head.
"Yea, that's what I want." Ashley replied softly. "Can you make sure I don't get pregnant or have an STD?"
"I can give you an emergency contraceptive, and some antibiotics to reduce the risk of an STD." She paused again, jotting some things down on her clipboard. "I'll send a nurse in to do the kit. We're going to need the clothes you were wearing during the assault."
Ashley glanced at her mom.
"They're still at Craig's house, Mom." Ashley said.
"Craig? Is that your rapist?" Dr. Watts cocked an eyebrow.
"No, no! Craig? No." Kate exclaimed, visibly flustered.
"No offense meant, ma'am. It's just that eighty percent of rapes are done by someone the victim knows." Dr. Watts voice was reassuring; it seemed like she'd gone through all this many times before. "Would you like to report the rape to the police?"
"He said he'd kill me if I told anyone." Ashley shook her head. "He'll kill me."
Dr. Watts sighed; she had done this before.
"Nearly all of them say that." She smiled kindly at Ashley. "And now most of them are in jail."
"Can I think about it?" Ashley asked, kicking her legs absent-mindedly. "About reporting it?"
"Of course. I'll be right back with a nurse to do the exam." She pulled open a counter drawer and retrieved a paper gown. "I'll need you to put this on."
Dr. Watts shut the door behind her, and Ashley examined the paper gown. It was the kind that you see in movies, with no backside whatsoever. It had three cloth ties that laced up the back, but otherwise, it was au natural.
Ashley crawled off the examination table and went into the adjacent bathroom. When she emerged a moment later, in her thin paper gown, her eyes were wide with fear.
"Mom, I don't know if I want to do this." Ashley whispered quickly, her breath coming short.
"Honey, you have to do this; for your own safety." Kate's brow furrowed in concern. "Are you alright? You sound like you're having a panic attack."