Ticking
People probably wonder why I shut myself in my room, just sitting there, in the silence. But it's not silence. If you listen closely, you can hear the steady ticking of a clock.
That's why I sit there, alone in my room.
If anyone knew that, they'd still wonder why I sit there, alone in my room. They wouldn't realize what's so nice about the steady ticking of a clock.
I can count on the clock. It'll just go on ticking. Some people might find it boring, but not me. It's reassuring, the way it just goes on, and on. Not like people. People change, people betray you. The clock can't do that. The clock can't think, it's not even alive.
I'm eighteen years old, and I've lived through the holocaust. I've had metal inserted into my bones. I wake up at night, scared because of someone else's nightmare. Because of someone else's life.
Sometimes I don't even get to sleep. The voices of people I've touched. Because whenever I touch someone, part of them goes into me. Their memories. I know my friends secrets, I know what everyone thinks of me, and I wish I didn't.
I want to be able to touch someone without hurting them. Trust someone without them using me.
That's why I like the clock. It just keeps on doing the same thing, over and over, no matter what.
Or that's what I thought.
One day, the clock stopped ticking. It betrayed me. I relied on it. Even though it's not alive, even though it can't think, it betrayed me.
I think that's when I completely stopped trusting people. It's also when I started to think about Anna.
Some people might say that deep down, I'll always be Anna, but I know they're wrong. I haven't been Anna for a long time. Anna wouldn't sit here, listening to a clock ticking. Anna wouldn't sit here with a knife in her hands.
I'm not Anna anymore, I'm Rogue, and I have to fight for the right to be myself. I'm Rogue, and I'm taking my life.
Author's Note:
This is my first fanfiction, so sorry if it's not any good. Please review! I don't care if you're only going to say that this story sucks!