It's the YouJack chapter Part Deux!
Just for anyone who doesn't realise, You equals Ethel, Ethel equals You, all clear?
The White Swan was heading towards Tortuga for a short stay in order for your crew to release some, er, tension from those long, lonely nights out at sea. Of course none of them would try anything with you as you have super fighting abilities even though you probably weigh less than half of any of them.
ListMakingReader: Ok, so that's super healing powers and super fighting abilities. Check and check.
But trouble struck when you were nearing the island. A ferocious storm hit suddenly, (as they so often do in the Caribbean of course!) but that didn't worry you. You were the famed Captain Ethel Moonshine!
ObservantReader: Already with the arrogance! Just like Jack.
Jack: That's Captain Jack Sparrow to yo -.
AllReaders: Ah shut up.
You battled the violent winds and the unpredictable waves. You were going to get through this your head told you, yet in your heart, you knew this would be the last time you'd ever see your crew sailing on your beloved White Swan. You were at the helm, trying hard to steer your ship while the rain clouded your eyes. Your long golden hair reflected the lightning so that those afar could discern it as a flickering frosty star.
AttentiveReader: The hell? We're in the middle of a bloody storm and the author starts going about her hair!
SmartReader: Someone hasn't been reading "The Guide to Writing a Craptastic Mary Sue". It clearly states in Section B, Paragraph 24 that at least one mention of the Mary Sue's hair must be included in every 3-12 chapters.
You looked out into the distance, hoping to see an end to the storm but what you saw made your heart stop and your insides cold with fear.
CynicalReader: It's the Loch Ness monster!
AttentiveReader: It's a "dangerous bolt of lightning!"
DumbReader: It's a bus!
TraumatisedReader: It's David Bowie in his Labyrinth costume! Aaargh! The tights and the cape!
A giant wave reared as high as a mountain. The waters around you seemed to be sucked up by the point of that towering mass of water. You knew you weren't going to make it, knew that this'll be the end of you.
You: Hold on!
WHOOSH!
Water lapped onto your face. The back of your head seared with pain as you lifted it up and opened your eyes. Where were you? You tried to remember what brought you to be lying on a sandy beach next to large plank of wood, but found that your mind was completely blank. It was night time. "That's funny" you thought, "I wouldn't go swimming when it is all dark like this".
CynicalReader: Clearly her IQ dropped 30 points when she lost her memory. Again.
PickyReader: Dude, there's more amnesia in this story than you can poke a stick at! (takes out stick and prods story. Amnesia squeals back)
You gathered yourself up and saw a Mysterious Figure walk towards you.
ObservantReader: And we're back to the beginning of the story again.
Author: Very "Truth Be Told" of Alias isn't it?
AllReaders: Oh shut up you geek!
HappyReader: That was a jolly long flashback/dream/exposition wasn't it?
Review me! (I have to start thinking of better ways to ask this)