Loyalty Chapter 12: We belong to only ourselves, a buffy x-overs fanfic

A/N: I don't think the last chapter was clear about what was going on with Angel, basically the card was saying he can go to this place and get a cure for not being able to walk in direct sunlight all will be revealed soon. And no-one died in the mini fight with the death eaters.

This is not a Harry/Ginny or a Draco/Ginny but both relationships will be in this fic.

Disclaimer: It belongs to J.K Rowling and Joss Whedon the song is by The Rakes, The guilt.

Chapter twelve; we belong to only ourselves.

I just woke up

Everything was fucked

From the night before

I was beyond repair

I had just woke up

Everything was wrong

All the cats were dead

And the phones were gone

I had just woke up

Like a heart attack

I weren't coming back

And mum was dressed in black

I had just woke up

Everything was fucked

The first few days of Hogwarts were an incoherent blur for Ginny, each one whirling by faster than the next and already so much had happened. The small part of Ginny that tied herself to Dean was becoming less and less prominent. She found herself almost ignoring his tirades about the summer and Football.

Dean had soon confronted her; her blasé reply had not been enough for him and he had dumped her, Ginny had shrugged a far of misty eyed expression upon her face. The students who had witnessed this very load and abrupt end to their relationship swore they thought Ginny was under the imperious curse.

She was not her mind was filled with other worries and speculations. Ginny had noticed for a while now that the tight tendril like grip her and her friends had upon each other was starting to loosen. It had started over a years previously when Faye's sister went missing then died.

Faye became like a corpse she didn't live, she existed; it effected everyone until the summer came and Faye was forgotten. Voldemort had risen yet again along with suspicions and new people to arrive in the bodies of Ginny's closest friends.

So far this week had been the most hectic first week back ever. Kaiya was even more depressed and sick looking than on the train and Harry Potter had somehow neglected to tell her that he was now Quidditch captain. He had risen to everyone's expectations but something else was starting to rise. Ginny's feeling for Harry were getting stronger by the day and her determination to be with him was no weaker.

The guilt won't leave my circulation

Ginny sat in potions next to Vanessa and Deon with Conroy and Tyler opposite them. It was a double period Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs but Kaiya had vaguely vanished to the hospital wing after breakfast about ten minutes ago.

They were trying to make a remedy for boils which according to Slughorn was "A piece of cherry pie" but proved incredibly fiddly.

"This week has been awful the twins are sleeping at home because their flat was ripped up by riots, my mums really worried about every thing and every one and I'm in love with Harry Potter," Ginny said dramatically. The four had just been talking about all their various problems and somehow Ginny had become the centre of discussion.

"I think my Dad's getting re married," Vanessa said abruptly.

"Merlin that's well that's I dunno good or bad?" Conroy asked. Vanessa shrugged in reply a sad confused look on her face.

"I fucked a girl from Slytherin last night and I made her cry when I said it was no more than a cheap one night stand. It was weird at first she seemed all up for a non committal shag then she got all Spice Girls on me," Tyler told the sickened looking teens.

"My mum's thinking of pulling me out of school," Conroy added.

The three started moaning and talking all at once about their problems. Deon had kept silent as usual after all he was the listener of the group but suddenly he felt swamped he felt like he was drowning in the buzz of their depressions and problems put unceremoniously upon him.

He could faintly see them all starring at him still discussing and wailing their faces contorted in front of his hazy vision. Deon could feel the weight of his six friend's woes asphyxiating him. He tried to concentrate on stabbing the glow worm but it was rubbery and hard to cut.

Deon lifted the knife up high in frustration and bought it down blindly; instead of connecting with the target he felt a sharp euphoria of pain against his lower arm. Deon could finally see, looking down at his arm, blood crimson against his black skin snaked round the muscles.

He felt pain but he liked it. The whole class was silently staring at him. Deon was transfixed by the branches of liquid seeping down him; he opened his palm letting the blood fall lazily into his hand. It was beautiful he thought. He would do this all the time just to be able to see that beautiful couler running into the lines of his hands.

I had just woke up

In someone elses bed

She was overweight

Who did I do last night?

I felt paradise

In between girl's thighs

It was quick and nice

The feelings cold as ice

I could hardly walk

And I had the shakes

Had to eat some fruit

Or I was gonna faint

I had just woke up

Everything was fucked

"Deon mate are you ok?" Tyler said his façade of shallow relationships and big headedness forgotten.

Deon looked up swallowing, the real sharp pain finally registering upon his broad face. He could see the classes worry they had seen his gaze of bliss and contentment just two seconds ago.

"Yeah I'm fine it was an accident," Deon answered. Slughorn had reached their table. He muttered a short spell and Deon's wounds seemed to knit together.

"Be more careful in future Joel," He said genially. The bell rung just as Slughorn opened his mouth to start another sentence.

The fifth years were hastily bustling out the class to allow entry to a selected amount of sixth year Gryffindors and Slytherins. Ginny caught the eye of Draco Malfoy as she left and he took his seat in the class, he smirked at her making an obscene gesture with his tongue against the side of his cheek.

The guilt won't leave my circulation

Harry was sitting at the lunch table studiously examining his nails just to avoid being caught up in the petty debate between Ron and Hermione. He was quite sure it had something to do with him, as yesterday he had finally decided to let them in on the Prophecy.

Ron and Hermione's expressions had not been ones of shock nor delight. Harry had felt great relief being able to tell them the prophecy and not have to worry afterwards about their confusion or worries over him. It was refreshing and exhilarating.

Harry glanced up from his blackened nails to see if Ron and Hermione were done. It seemed he was to be disappointed, they were still seething at eachother and snapping out snide remarks to the others disadvantage. Harry sighed and departed from the table deciding he should put up a poster for Quidditch trials.

As Harry walked up the second floor corridor he caught heard the faint sound of "fuck you and bugger of!" coming from round one of the corners. Enticed he rounded the back of a large weight bearing suite of armour and peered around it.

Pushed up against a wall was Kaiya Cooper, Malfoy pinning her there by his two slender hands. Harry was about to intervene until he heard the next words spoken by Malfoy.

"Kaiya don't you go fucking with by head I have my orders and so do you! If I don't do this I'll get killed by my master just to be resurrected so Ray can kill me again. If you keep you're end of the bargain you might just save both our lives," he said softly brushing a strand of hair from her tear streaked face.

"I…I can't she's the only person that's ever stuck by me," Kaiya chocked stifling a sob.

"That's very touching darlin but I don't want to die so it's either her or me, you and the rest of them. Remember that message Ray sent to Deon well he follows his threats believe me I should know," Malfoy glared at her and walked of through a door pretending to be solid wall.

Harry would have gone after him if not for the crumpled form of the light haired Gryffindor before him. Harry had one foot out from behind his hiding spot but Kaiya had already gone.

Harry shook his head disbelievingly, what was that he had just witnessed and was that pain and disgust in himself upon Malfoy's face as he had left.

The boy who lived shook his head before disappearing into the shadows. The only thing left in the eerily deserted corridor was the memories of that assault lingering in the walls along with the smell of the hurt, anger and sadness from each student and the bitter taste of something not in the least bit as it seemed.

I need one day a week

For my cuts to heal

Take every Monday off

With my blood shot eyes

If work only knew

What I got up to

At the weekend

They wouldn't speak to me

Or pretend to be my friends

Take every Monday off

With my blood shot eyes

I had just woke up

Everything was fucked

One boy saw life as it truly was no smoke screens, rusty mirrors or lies. Conroy Smike had his own lies, his own way of escaping and his own way of dealing with reality.

He thought this as a blissful twinge shot through his arm and the best orgasm he had ever had times ten leaked into his body. Conroy let the syringe linger in his belt strapped arm for a while before pulling free. His mind felt blank he was peaceful and everything was clear to him.

The answer wasn't to fight the answer was…Heroin.

The guilt won't leave my circulation

A/N: So what did you think I know a little darker than usual but I think it's more interesting like this anyway please review makes me happy!