For disclaimers…see chapter one. Please read authors note at the bottom and don't forget to review!

Three weeks later………

It had been three weeks since Savannah had died. Three weeks since harm had become nothing more then a shell inside. His parents came and went. People were constantly dropping by, Jen had all but moved in, so it seemed to Harm that he never got any real time to grieve. He watched his son constantly looking around for his mamma. He watched as Mattie put on a brave face, but Harm knew that inside, she felt as bad as he did. She had lost another mother.

Currently Harm was sitting outside on the porch swing holding Savannah in his arms. He really wasn't sure if it was a blessing or a curse that she looked just like her mamma. A blessing that his little girl would grow up just as beautiful as her mother or that his little girl would be a constant reminder of what he had lost. Swallowing hard, he shook his head and made a promise to his daughter that he would never think that way. Losing Savannah was like losing a part of himself, but holding this little angel in his arms was like a gift from God. And Savannah had given him that.

He shifted his sleeping daughter into his other arm when he saw the car pull up. He immediately knew who it was and prayed that he would be able to get through this without totally making an ass out of himself. When he saw Mac step out of the car and hesitantly walk over to him, he could see the hesitation in her eyes. After Paraguay, things have been as strained as ever. Even four years after the fact, they still didn't seem to be on good terms with each other. Her relationship with Webb had long ended, but things between the two long time friends never had gotten better. He really did miss her.

Meeting Savannah shortly after his departure from JAG had turned his world upside down. Savannah was a pro bono lawyer mainly hired by low income families who barely had enough to get by.

"I work pro bono. I could have gone big, I mean I was offered a job in a very nice firm and my salary could have been triple what it is now, but when I look at these people, Harm they have nothing and people who have nothing tended to get kicked around a lot more by people who think that they can get away with it. That's why I work pro bono. Because by helping out these people, even if it's only a little bit, it sends a picture to these guys who are doing the kicking. I go to work every day, and let these people know that I'll be damned if they think they can get away with hurting these people anymore. Even if I don't win, I give my clients the satisfaction of standing up to those people who hurt them. And sometimes that's better then a big pay check and a fancy new car."

And that was when Harm knew he was in love.

Mac cautiously walked up the steps and stopped at the top, she folded her hands across her chest and gave harm a small smile.

"How you doing stickboy?"

Harm laughed at the old nick-name, and gave a small smile. He gestured for her to sit before he spoke.

"Could be better…could be worse though too."

She sighed and turned to him. "Do you need anything; I mean is there anything I can help with?"

Harm laughed again and shook his head.

"I think I've gotten as much help for two lifetimes. Sturgis agreed to stand in for me at the next practice for the boys, my mom and Frank just left. Jen has been stopping by a lot to help with Mattie, Tyler and Savannah. I think we'll be okay."

Mac grabbed his hand and held it briefly as she looked at him. Harm often thought that when she looked at him that way that she was looking right into his soul.

"But I asked how you were doing," she said squeezing his hand again before letting it go.

Harm shook his head. "I honestly don't know Mac. I don't, but I know that we'll be okay. That whatever happens, we'll be okay."

Mac smiled, "since when have you become an optimist?"

"Since I've raised three kids; you can do nothing but hope for the best and accept whatever comes your way."

"Seems like a very wise thing to say."

It was silent for awhile, Harm and Mac listening to the sounds of the night each taking in what had happened, not just in the past few weeks, but in all of the years that they have known each other, until Mac finally voiced what they had both been asking themselves.

"Why did it never work between us," she asked softly. Harm strained to hear the words, and almost regretted making the effort. He didn't know what to say, hell even if he did chances are she wouldn't want to hear it.

He sighed, running a finger over Savannah's face and shifted her to his other arm. He was quiet for a long while before he answered her.

"It's like you said after Paraguay, "because we both want to be on top, physically and emotionally, and that's impossible.""

She gave a small laugh but sighed again the expression on her face a mix of sadness and longing.

"And do you really believe that?"

Harm shook his head. "No I never did. But you did and that's all that mattered. I know I screwed up in the past Mac, we both did. It took a lot for me to realize why we made the decisions that we've made, and why we could never put our friendship back together."

"You got married," she stated, but her voice wasn't bitter, she sounded sadder than anything.

"Yeah, I did," he whispered trying not to wake up his daughter. "And I don't regret it. I love…I loved Savannah. She-"

"You don't have to explain it Harm," Mac said holding up her hands. "I could see it, I always could. I don't resent that you married her. I am…was…" she sighed and ran a hand through her hair. "You and Savannah were right for each other."

"And we weren't?"

She sighed again. They had really entered the muddy waters now, and there was no going back.

"What do you want me to say Harm?"

"Why did everyone else see what we didn't? Hell even Savannah saw it," he paused and swallowed hard and continued before Mac could say anything. "I don't know Mac. I've changed Mac, we both have. We've known each other so long…I've always loved you Mac." He said whispering the declaration.

Mac could hear the "but" hanging in the air, but he didn't continue. And suddenly Mac knew what he was telling her. That after all of this, that after everything that they've been through together, that any chance that they could have had of being together just didn't exist any more. And after all of that, and his sudden declaration, she sure as hell wasn't going to leave it at that.

"And I've always loved you, Harm, I still do. And I just wasn't you to know that I'll always be there for you. I'm not going to let you go Harm."

Harm shook his head almost violently shaking off Mac's words, and she knew why. Harm had been hurt so many times in the past by women; Diane, Annie, Bobbie, Jordan, Renee…Harm wasn't the type of person that dealt with loss easily. After losing his father, Mac knew he tried his hardest not to be put in that situation again, but it always happened to him.

"I'm not giving up on you Harm. I'm not going to let you give up on yourself. You are a good person, Harm. You a good father to those kids a good mentor and a damn good lawyer."

Harm gave a weak smile. "Trying to boost my ego Colonel?"

Mac laughed and let him change the subject, "like it need's it."

Harm scrubbed his hands over his face, and it was then that Mac truly saw him. How tired and emotionally scared he was.

"I don't know Mac, I don't think…"

"You don't need to think Harm. You just need to know that I'll always be there for you." She gave his hands another quick squeeze and left. Harm sat on the porch hours after he left contemplating the women in his life. Just how did he get so lucky? He glanced down at Savannah and whispered. "We're going to be okay baby girl, we really are."

TBC.

Next chap… More people from Harm's past come to help him…stay tuned to find out whom.

A/N: Thank you guys for hanging in there so long. I had meant to update last weekend but my family threw me a surprise part for graduation. I graduated college! So my Dad had to get me out of the house for the day so everything could be set up. Anyways a special thanks to Virago500 for the inspiration to write this chap. I hope this answered some of your questions.

No one has commented about the mystery woman who came to see Harm in the hospital, and was comforting Mattie. Did you guys figure it out or not?

Reviews:

Virago500: You were right…and several, more people have pointed that out to me. It was more like Renee was throwing the whole relationship in Mac's face because Renee knew that she had something that Mac wanted. Kind of like Brumby did with Harm. Jeeze can we say territorial? I don't see much more H/M action coming from this, nor do I see harm moving on anytime soon, but Jen will be in this story more; I just had to get this out of the way. My plan wasn't going to be to kill of harm's wife, but it does a quiet a twist to the story. And who knows who else will be popping up in the story. Thanks so much for your reviews, and keep them coming.

Anshe: Ouch. What can I say? I hope you're still reading. Harm ending up with Mac might happen and it might not. If you don't like this story because of it well that's okay. I have written other stories that are H/M if you want to check those out. Thanks for reading up to this point though.

Major Passion: I know and I totally agree with you, but you've gotta remember that Harm just lost his wife. But Mac isn't going to give up on his so easily. Thanks for reading!

Syrae: You're welcome. And he's not going to be coping with it alone. Like I've hinted, there will be more people popping in the story. Harm has a lot of friends; they won't let him go through it alone. Thanks for reading!

Lynnp: I know, I didn't want Harm's wife to die either, but it had to happen. She was a good person who really changed Harm for the better, and it's because of that change that helps harm to change the way he views life. Thanks so much for reading!

MichelleÂ: I know, it's sad, but having that happen to him has made a big impact on the way he looks at life now, and he'll be out to change certain things about his life. It will be an interesting ride…Thanks for reading.

TV Angel 711: Throwing hands up Yeah I know, I goofed up with that comment, didn't I? You're right, Harm didn't throw the relationship in Mac face; it's more like Renee was doing the throwing. Mac is not going to give up on Harm that easily, but you gotta remember that Harm is still grieving over his wife. It might happen, it might not, but there relationship will take a turn in this story you just gotta hang in there. Thanks for reading.

Myla: Thanks for reading and thank you for the kind words.

Bree: yeah, Harm is going to be playing the role of a single father for awhile, whether he'll end up with another character in the end…well you'll just have to wait and see. And yeah I did goof up with that comment. Harm didn't throw the relationship in Mac face; it's more like Renee was. Thanks for reading.