"A-HA!"

Everyone looked up at the door; Harry, Hermione and Ron froze as Hajile worked at putting an unconscious Nasus on the couch. There in the doorway standing over the mysterious tortoise was Draco Malfoy. His wand was pointed at the Golden Trio, a sneer upon his face. Harry stood on shaking legs. "YOU! I KNEW it!"

"Whatever, Potty! Because of all you cowards, I'm in your common room and in control! NOW then…" Draco said, walking along the wall, making everyone cower away from him. His eyes were now set on Nasus. "Wait…" he muttered, blinking hard. "She… she has WINGS!"

"YOU LEAVE HER ALONE!" Hajile screeched, holding her close. Malfoy came out of his shock to sneer more.

"Well, well, well. It looks like my friend LIED about Nasus' uber speshul powas." He said. As if this story were completely formulated, using coincidences and horrible exposition as plot devices that didn't quite sit well with the reader on how to interpret, Ybbuh suddenly returned to his human form, the tortoise shell twisting away from view into nothing. "I'll let it slide this time,"

"I didn't TELL you because… because I was so ASHAMED of it!" Ybbuh yelled, pointing at Nasus. "She's a terrible, ugly freak!"

"How DARE you!" Hajile bellowed, standing up and going to Ybbuh. "You tell me why I shouldn't go "Kevin" on your arse!"

"Oh PLEASE, you had ropes and pulleys and stuff! You're as much a ninja as I'm a sandwich!" Ybbuh said, pointing to a squished ham sandwich on the floor.

"I can see your revulsion, Ybbuh. Just LOOK at her." Draco said. Sneering. "Nevertheless, we could use her powers against the good side. We can make her fly over muggles and drop dung bombs on them, or take her to Voldemort to torture her!"

"NOO!" Hajile cried; he saw no use in this. The ebul Slethrni would stop at NOTHING to further his ebul plans! Without thinking he flew over to Draco and dropped to his knees. "Take… take me instead. I cannot bear to have her subjected to awful meanies on the Dark Side!"

"NOO!" Hermione wailed; Harry grabbed her Hot Topic corset laces to hold her back from rushing at the scene ahead of them. Draco's eyes narrowed as he sneered. He looked from Hajile to Nasus a few moments.

"Fine. You'll do. That way… she'll come looking for you anyways. Ybbuh!"

Ybbuh ran over. "Yea?"

"Tie this ineffectual hobbit up. We're taking him to Sleteyrn to meet some…" Draco said, looking to Hajile with a sneer. "…Friends,"

"Do what you will! Just do NOT hurt Nasus!" he yelled as Ybbuh grabbed Hermione's CD player headphones then tied Hajile's wrists behind his back. Hajile panted with fear and hatred as he was drawn up to stand. Draco grabbed his chin and sneered.

"Oh yes. Our Master shall be pleased." He said with a sneer. Hajile flinched away, shooting Draco a murderous look.

"NO! Take ME instead!" Hermione suddenly yelled. Her waist was about the width of a hairpin now with the force of Harry's hold on her strings. Draco rolled his eyes as he backed out of the doorway, Ybbuh already having dragged Hajile away.

"Hermione, please. Getting to torture 'North' is MUCH more satisfying than messing with a Mudblood," he said, sneering.

He was now gone into the shadowy corridors, leaving behind a shocked Harry, a dumbfounded Ron, and a wheezing for sweet, sweet breath Hermione. "'Arry…" she strangled out. "Oo… can let go…"

"OH! Sorry!" Harry said, letting the ties of her cheaply constructed outfit go. And cheap was right; the fake leather came apart, leaving her in her studded bra. She gasped; Blaize Zamboni passed by in that moment and nodded approvingly as he looked inside.

"Yea, I'd do 'er," he stated. Harry went over and shut the portrait hole hard.

"All right. We HAVE to come up with a plan to rescue Hajile, hopefully before Nasus wakes up. She'll get completely wonky if she finds out Hajile's given himself up to the ebul Sylverins,"

"Mental." Ron said, staring at Hermione's breast-implanted rack.

Two hours later, they had nothing; Nasus was stirring on the couch, eyes fluttering open. "Wha…" she gasped, trying to look around. "Hajile? Hajile, where are you…?"

Harry, Ron and Hermione exchanged looks. Harry coughed into his hand and walked over. "Nasus… I don't know how to tell you this…"

The smile on her face grew wide. "THERE you are, my sweet Hajile!"

Harry's eyes went wide, blinking profusely. "What… it's me, Harry Potter…"

"Oh STOP Hajile… everyone says that about you!"

Harry looked over at Ron and Hermione, who were rolling their eyes. "What is she talking about?"

Ron sighed. "'Ave you read the rag-mags, Harry?"

"No."

"You two may as well be interchangeable." Hermione said. Her face brightened. "And yea… I can see it."

"Stop! We need to find out how to keep Nasus calm when she finds out that Draco kidnapped…" Harry went to say; he stopped mid-sentence. "Wait… if she thinks I'm Hajile…"

"PLEASE, Harry. If I hear her whine for her 'poor, downtrodden hobbit', I'll get sick," Hermione stated, scowling. Before anyone could say anything more, a knocking came from the portrait hole. Harry walked over and answered it.

"Urm… yes?"

"We received an owl," the mysterious woman said. "What exactly is going on?"

He resisted to the very core of him; he would NOT show weakness to these brutes! He pulled at the restraints holding him into the hard, wooden chair they'd force him to sit into. "You'll never be able to torture me! As long as Nasus is safe, that's ALL I need!" he cried just as one large boy fitted his ankles to the chair. Draco sneered, walking over to him.

"Wouldn't be so sure of that. I've got my ways," Draco said. He turned to the one named Goyle and sighed. "So. Which shall we go with? The dolphin-shagging pretty boy, or the Eskimo-Beaded Tribal Outfitted-Cowboy Moron?"

Goyle sniggered to himself; Hajile shook like a leaf now, looking up at Draco as he pointed his wand to a large screen at the front of the room. "Flipperino,"