Chapter five
Come on, Vamenos!
NARRATOR: Harry, Ron Erik and all of them narrowly escaped the cracking ice, and now are venturing the snowy land in search for Carlotta and Christine.
RON: Where could they've gone? I swear, we have already looked here...
HERMIONE: We probably shouldn've left them hanging there
RAOUL:(starts squealing exitedly) I'm so smart! I'm glad I did it!
ERIK: Did what Fop?
RAOUL:(glares at Erik) I was smart enough to leave a trail of chocolate bars behind (points at trail of chocolate bars behind them)
MEG: Thas pretty smart, considering that it came from him
ERIK: Well, we have ourselves a classic Gretel
RAOUL:(beams)
ERIK:Who happens to be a girl
RAOUL: (still beams)
ERIK: Okay, an idiot
RAOUL: (still beaming!)
(they decide to ignore Raoul and follow the trail of Kit Kats, which leads them to the edge of the ice.)
HARRY: I think they're somewhere that way (points to the sea)
ERIK: Christine is my love, I cant lose her
HERMIONE: What about Carlotta
ERIK: What about her?
HERMIONE:...
ERIK:...
EVERYONE ELSE:...
MEG: EVERYONE LOOK IN THE WATER! IT'S CARLOTTA!
(they all look, and Carlotta is floating in the water, lying on top of a suitcase that Harry brought. they help her up)
CARLOTTA: Eet was zo cold, und-
ALL EXEPT HER: Where's Christine?
CARLOTTA: Cristine? I don know. But 'oo 'ave me, ri-
RON: We have to find Christine!
CARLOTTA: Vatevah
AN UNKNOWN VOICE: A girl is lost? We have to find her! Come on, vamenos!
(they all look toward the source of the mysterious voice, and see a strange little spanish girl with a blue monkey in boots)
SPANISH GIRL (Otherwise known as DORA): Hola! I'm Dora, and this is my monkey, Boots!
CARLOTTA: Hola
ERIK: Oh, god not another one
BOOTS: I'm Boots, the mon-
RON: She just said that!
BOOTS: Come on, Dora. THese people are mean
DORA: No, they're probably just grumpy. (singing that retarded song)
Come on, vamenos
Everybody let's go!
BOOTS: C'mon, let's get to it
DORA: I know that we can do it
BOOTS: Where are we going? (clap clap clap)
DORA: Arctic depths!
Where are we going? (clap clap clap)
BOOTS: Arctic depths!
BOTH: Where are we going? (clap clap clap)
MEG/RAOUL: Arctic depths!
DORA/BOOTS: Where are we going?
(magical theme song)
RAOUL/MEG/DORA/BOOTS: ARC-TIC DEPTHS!
ERIK: Okayyyyyy...
HARRY: Vamenos?
CARLOTTA: Dondo esta mes pantalones?
DORA: Aqui, aqui aqui!
ERIK: Everyone shut the hell up!
DORA: Uh oh! He said a baaaaad word!
RON: (sarcastically)Oh, shame shame shame!
CARLOTTA: THis faithless lady's bound for-
ERIK: Don't even think about it.
CARLOTTA:...
ERIK: Thas what I thought
RAOUL: Ooh, she has a monkey! I want it!
BOOTS: Dora, that man scares me
ERIK: Okay, whatever. The weird little spanish girl and her talking monkey can join us, BUT WE NEED TO FIND CHRISTINE!
DORA: Who's Christine?
EVERYONE EXEPT FOR BOOTS AND DORA: Ohmigod, they are friggin idiots
RON: Christine is the one thas missing!
BOOTS: I knew that!
ERIK: NO YOU DIDN'T, YOU RETARDED LITTLE MONKEY!
BOOTS: (starts crying)
ERIK: Who votes we can ditch them?
DORA: Thas not nice!
ERIK: Go shove it, you little brat
HERMIONE: Whatever, let's just find her
CARLOTTA: She's probably dead
RON: Scary mental image
DORA: That is not positive thinking!
RON: You're not positive thinking
DORA: (pouts) I hate these people, and hate is not usually in my vocabulary
RAOUL: Your vocabawhatalairy?
(All stare at him)
MEG: I'm just gonna start walking, I don't care about the rest of you
RAOUL: Nuuuuu! Don't leave me with them! They'll stare me to death!
(they all follow Meg, talking about how they hate each other)
ERIK: (to Raoul) And I hate you the most, (to Carlotta) And I hate you, (to Dora) And I hate you, (to Boots) And I REALLY hate you, (to Hermione) You're allright, (to Harry and Ron) so are you, (to Meg) and you're tolerable
RON: Sweeeeeet...
CARLOTTA: Und I just 'ate 'oo all
RON: Sweeeeeet...
HARRY: How're we gonna find her
MEG: We should probably just try to follow the edge of the ice
RON: Sweeeeee-
ERIK: WILL YOU STOP SAYING THAT?
RON:...
RAOUL: Feisty
ERIK: Fop
RAOUL: Poopy head
BOOTS: Speaking of poopy, Dora, I need to go potty!
ERIK: THEN GO IN THE SNOW!
BOOTS: But thas not right!
MEG: You'd better'd just hold it in
BOOTS: (pouts) Okay...
ERIK: (hums Angel of Music)
DORA: That song sound pretty! Can you sing it?
ERIK: I need Christine to sing it, it's a duet!
DORA: Then sher can sing also! Where is Christine? Is she that one?
BOOTS: No, thas Hermione! Is she her?
ERIK: God, kill me now...
DORA: No, thas Meg! Is she that one?
BOTH: No, thas Raoul!
RAOUL: Huh? Whuzza?
ERIK: If you don't shut up now, I will kick the shit out of you two!
BOOTS:...
DORA:...
ERIK: (singing to himself)
Insolent boy,
This slave if fashion
Basking in your
glory!
RAOUL: (singing)
One, two, three four five
Once I caught a fish alive!
Six, seven, eight nine ten,
Then I let it go again!
Why did you let it go?
Because it bit my finger so!
Which finger did it bite?
This little pinkie on the right!
(everyone starts humming or singing to themselves, then...)
MEG: I SEE CHRISTINE! (points to the water)
(they all dash over to where she is and pulls her out of the water. She is not moving. Harry takes her pulse)
ERIK: Well?
HARRY: (looks sadly up at Erik)