"Okay Giles, what was so important that you had to interrupt my sex session with Xander?" Anya was her usual self as she and her boyfriend arrived at Giles' house.
Xander was suitably chagrined. "Anya… no."
"Oh, is that another one of those things humans aren't supposed to talk about in a casual manner? This was so much simpler in the Dark Ages."
"Giles, Ahn kind of has a point," Xander said. "It's almost midnight, couldn't whatever new slimy world-destroying horror you've found wait 'til morning?"
"Hi Giles!" said Willow as she and Buffy appeared behind Xander and Anya. She appeared fully awake and energetic, in painful contrast to everyone else.
"You were already awake weren't you?" Xander said with barely suppressed loathing.
"I had some studying to do. Oh! Did you take a look at the meteor yet Giles?"
There was a snort from behind them, and they turned to face Spike. "I dunno how good a look he got at it, but it sure got a good look at him. Didn't it, Watcher?"
"Spike, what are you doing here?" Buffy asked as she and her friends moved into the living room and sat down. Spike stepped inside behind them and leaned against a wall, oozing disinterest.
"I'm afraid that Spike has a place in this discussion, Buffy," Giles said. "Spike, what happened to the truck?"
"I managed to catch sight of it, driving along without a care in the world, free of any buggery hitchhikers. Your pal must have found someone else to play with."
Xander cut in. "Okay, can we back up to the part where you tell us what's going on? Cause I'm just lost here."
Giles sighed. "Buffy found what she thought was a meteor while on patrol. But it's not a meteor, at least not in the sense of being a rock from space. It was an egg."
"Oh my God." Buffy's eyes widened as she realized what she'd brought into Giles' home. "What kind of creature? What did it do?"
"Yellow scorpiony bugger with lotsa legs, latched onto his face and stuck some tube down his throat." Spike answered. "Why any demon would want to hug his ugly mug, let alone shove something down his mouth-"
"That's enough Spike." Giles interrupted. "And you and Willow couldn't have known, Buffy. Right now, we must find out more about this creature. It may be small, but it was very strong, quick, and clever, especially for a newborn. And it secreted extremely potent acid to escape."
"So.. I guess this means research?" said Xander.
"We don't need research. I know what the demon is," announced Anya.
Yes!thought Xander. No research! And I had reservations about a 1'000 year old girlfriend! He struggled to keep his face devoid of relief.
"It's called a Hurk'ugh'Rekk demon. They're from another dimension," continued Anya.
"Hurk'ugh'rekk? What kind of a name is that?" asked Buffy.
"I think the last syllable sounds Sumarian..." Willow suggested.
"I believe the name carries Babylonian origins." Giles said.
"I think it sounds like someone gagging and hurling," added Xander.
"Actually, Xander's right," Anya said. "The name comes from the noises made by one of its first victims." Xander wondered if he might be on some sort of roll.
"Charming." said Buffy. "What else?"
"They send their young here to prove their worthiness to exist. They drain people's life-forces through those tubes of theirs. If they drain enough energy from people to teleport themselves home, they do so and are accepted as a productive, well-adjusted member of demon society and everybody's happy... except the drained people, who are shriveled corpses. But, if they don't suck enough life forces, they die after 24 hours."
"Well, that's good," said Willow.
"Aah… I see. So the portal used by these demons manifests itself as a burst of flame?" Giles asked.
"Yes, which is why Buffy thought it was a meteor. Very common mistake," Anya said.
"Wait a tick," said Spike. "I've seen 'Rekks before and they didn't look like the thing that jumped Giles. Too many legs, tail too long..."
"And I had the misfortune to have that tube inserted into my throat, and I can say with confidence that it was not trying to take anything out." added Giles. "In fact… it felt like something was trying to come in…"
"That egg had a lot of momentum," Buffy said. "It smashed through a vamp's chest and left a trench in the ground. I don't think it was teleported."
"Well, what do you think it is?" challenged Anya, rather miffed at having her store of demon knowledge contradicted. "Cause I've got 1'000 years of supernatural experience which says there is no other demonic creature which looks like that or comes from that kind of egg."
Willow had picked up the egg, and was gingerly turning it over in her hands, looking into the slimy interior. "If it's not any demon we know, then… well," she put it down again. "Maybe this is a meteor. Maybe this creature is something else."
No one said anything as the implications of what Willow had said sunk in.
"Oh no," said Xander. "We are not doing this 'War of the Worlds' thing. I much prefer good old, slayable demons to ray-gun wielding terror from beyond the Solar System. I saw 'Mars Attacks', and I have no desire to die being burned to a radiation-charred skeleton."
"I don't think a foot-long creature is going to be shooting off any 'ray guns' Xander," Giles said. "As for the rest, I feel we must investigate every possibility... there are some precedents for beasts being summoned from the stars. At any rate, we should make this out top priority. This creature was dangerous immediately after birth. I would much rather not find out what it's capable of once fully grown."
"Right." said Buffy. "I'll check the spot where I found the egg next time I patrol."
"I'll do some research and find out which is more likely- interdimensional portals, or an organic meteor able to survive atmospheric re-entry." Willow volunteered.
"You'd best take the egg, too." said Giles. "I can't study it very well here, but the university's science equipment might help you to make something out of it."
"What about the Initiative?" asked Buffy. Everyone turned to look at her. "I mean, they might know stuff we don't, about what this thing is."
Giles sighed. "I suppose it would be prudent to inform them, though I can't say I relish having to depend on Maggie Walsh for information… But it would be best to have all the help we can."
"Okay," said Buffy. "I'll talk to Riley after class."
Spike had been fidgeting and now moved towards the door. "If that's all then, I'll be going to see what's left of my party. Clem had better not've let them trash the crypt."
Anya also got up. "Well if no one's going to listen to me, I'll go as well. Don't come crying to me when you get the life force sucked out of you." She left in a huff, Xander trailing behind. Buffy and Willow left as well, after apologizing for almost getting Giles killed. He watched them go, then closed the door and went to fix his window. A house must be secure in Sunnydale, after all... he thought, forgetting that he hadn't locked the door...
A/N: Disclaimer: I don't own "Mars Attacks."