A/N: I don't know why I'm, making this into a fanfic, but I had fun with it. I originally posted this on a Phantom of the Opera fan site message board, but I wanted to share it with you lot.
It's just a silly double-innuendo scene I made up. Erik and Christine are doing one thing, but it sounds like another. You'll see.
Rated 'T' for obvious reasons.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, or anything remotely Phantom related. Isn't that so sad?
Raoul was strolling about the Opera House, one bright morning, frequently getting lost in the corridors, but nevertheless having a jolly good time. He was sucking on his lolly, when he stopped outside Erik's bedroom, hearing a strange conversation.
Erik: Please, Christine? Please?
Christine: No! How many times must I tell you?
Erik: Please, love? I've done it before and things worked out just fine.
Christine: You were lucky that time. But you won't fit again, I'm telling you!
Erik: Sure, I will! Watch!
Christine: -groans- Now you've done it!
Erik: -smilingly- It's warm in here.
(Raoul, horrified, yet all the more curious, presses his ear against the door.)
Christine: Yes, well. Let's see you get it out.
Erik: But of course! I've got what I want, so off I go. -strains-
Christine: -worried- You're going to break it!
Erik: -irritated grunt- I can't get it out! I'm stuck!
(Raoul's face pales and he clutches at his chest.)
Christine: Don't be so rough!
Erik: Don't fret...I've almost got it.
Christine: No! You've got to let it go, and then you'll fit!
Erik: Don't tell me what to do! I can do it, just you wait. -loud grunt-
Christine: -screams- Now you've shattered it!
(Raoul faints dead away, his precious lolly falling to the floor and crashing into a million sharp pieces)
Erik: Oh. We'll get a new cookie jar. But behold! I've got my freshly baked cookie!
Christine: It was my grandma's! I told you your hand wouldn't fit!
Erik: -takes a bite out of cookie- Hmmm, delicious.
Did that make any sense? Well, anyway. Flames, laughs and constructive criticism are always welcome.