"What did you do to her!" Alice's voice boomed through the house.
"I don't know!" Edwards voice boomed back at equal volume. I looked around the small room, my vision blurred by tears. I forced my body to pick itself up from the ground, and walk to the sink.
In the mirror above the sink, I saw a reflection of a miserable girl. Her hair messed up and her eyes drenched with tears. I ran the cold water, and splashed my face. The cool water refreshed my face, relieving my sore eyes and raw cheeks.
I raised both my hands to the sides of my temples and massaged them, trying to rid myself of my massive headache. I heard a loud pounding, and thought it was just my head, but my ears finally heard the voice coming from the other side of the door.
"Bella sweetheart, please open up." Edwards's melodic voice echoed in the bathroom. Hearing his voice brought more painful tears to my eyes. "Open the door. We need to talk."
"I tried to talk earlier, Edward, but you didn't seem too interested." I snapped. I heard him quietly sigh.
"Are you crying, Bella?"
"No" I tried to choke back a sob, but I didn't succeed.
"Oh, Bella." I walked over to the door, and cracked it open a sliver. He outstretched his arm, and slowly stroked my cheek. His touch made me melt inside, and I wanted so bad to forgive him right there but I knew I couldn't.
"Can we talk about this now." I could hear a hint of annoyance in his voice. Not wanting to make him angry at my words, I just nodded. He led me into his bedroom where he motioned for me to sit on a brown leather couch. He sat opposite of me in a black desk chair.
"What is it you want to know Bella?" I nervously rubbed my hands together, trying to gather all of the never stopping thoughts in my head. What should I ask him first?
"Where were you?" He rested his head in his hands.
"I was in Spokane." Okay, so he didn't leave to country. That was a plus, I guess.
"Were you with anyone?" He immediately shook his head 'no'. So it wasn't as bad as I thought. I took in a deep breath, preparing myself for this last question. I knew he would get angry. I was scared he would snap and hurt something….or someone. "What did you do that you won't tell me?"
He sobbed, and I knew that if he could cry he would.
"Bella, you aren't going to like this. Please don't get angry with me. I love you with everything I have." I didn't like this.
"I was walking around town, and I smelt this smell. It hit me so hard, and I knew immediately it was blood." Okay, so he smelt blood. He's a vampire, that's natural. He sighed again, and ran his hand through his hair.
"I followed the smell, against my instincts. I found myself almost stalking this girl. Her blood smelt better than yours, Bella. So much more irresistible." For reasons unknown to me, anger and jealousy crept through my veins. I was able to put these feelings aside and let him finish.
"I watched her as she entered a few shops, and finally walking towards a secluded area. I just couldn't resist anymore, and my animal instincts took over. I lunged at her, killing the poor girl." I began to cry and I had no clue why. Was I jealous that he liked her blood better? Was I not good enough for him? I didn't understand! I wanted to scream out of frustration, cry out of sadness for the girl, and kill Edward out of anger.
"You…" I said, pointing a finger in Edward's direction. I struggled to get my words out and when they did they were shaking, uneasy. "You stay away from me." I backed up towards the door, trying to make a quick exit.
"Bella, don't do this."
"I will do what I want, Edward." My unpleasant words caused him some discomfort. I opened the door, and made my way out and down the stairs. I could hear my name being called by Edward as I left the house. Once I got outside I realized that I hadn't brought my truck. I mentally kicked myself for believing I did, and for ruining my plan.
My footsteps sped up as I heard him following my track. I folded my arms over my chest as the cold air hit me, and I realized I forgot my jacket in Edward's car.
"Bella, stop." I ignored his voice, and kept walking. "Will you just stop?" I stopped after hearing the desperation in his voice. I turned my body around to look at him. Slowly, he walked towards me, acting as if I was an animal about to run away. When he had closed the large gap between us, he grabbed my folded arms. His touch sent shock waves through my body. My arms fell to my side, and he grabbed my wrists, trying to hold me back from running away.
His grip began to tighten around my wrists, cutting off my circulation.
"Let go, Edward. You're hurting me." He heard my words, but they seemed not to register in his mind. "Edward!" I yelled as loud as I could through my sobs. I looked into his eyes and saw anger in them. They were not the regular topaz colour, but they were slowly turning black.
He finally realized what he was doing and let go of my wrists. "Bella, I'm…"
I cut him off before he could finish. "Yes, I know you're sorry Edward. But I'm still mad." He looked at me quizzically.
"I told you what you wanted to hear, why are you still mad?" I didn't even know why I was mad.
"I honestly don't know. All I know is I feel anger. Maybe I'm jealous that you liked her blood better than mine." I stifled back yet another sob.
"Listen to me, okay. Really listen." I nodded at his request. Edward took my head in his hands, stroking my jaw line. "Yes, her blood was more irresistible, but I love you. You have my whole heart. You are my life, my one and only love." My eyes began to well up with tears again but this time they were out of happiness.
"I love you too" I took my hands from my sides, and put them on top of his that still held my face. He leaned forward and kissed me gently. My knees went wobbly and I tried my best to stay standing. All of my fears and worries were released. I felt completely at ease with Edward once again.
"Let's get you home." I nodded and we began to walk back to his house.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I entered my bedroom, emotionally drained. I fell on to my bed, letting out a long sigh as I hit the soft mattress. Then I realized I was still in my clothes from that day. I grabbed my pyjamas and ran into the bathroom. The long shower relaxed my worn out muscles.
After my shower, I changed into my nightclothes and brushed my teeth. When I got back into my room, I saw Edward lying on my bed, his arms behind his head and his eyes closed. I took off at a fast speed and jumped on top of him, straddling his stomach. As I landed, his eyes popped open. I leaned down towards his face and kissed his cold lips. I parted form our kiss, and stared at him, wondering how I could ever be angry at this magnificent creature.
His eyes shone of a bright topaz colour and his hair, so perfectly messy, bronze like a penny.
"You're beautiful." I told him. He looked surprised at my sudden comment.
"This is so wrong." I moved so I was lying beside him. He ran his hand through my hair.
"But yet, I feel as if this is how it was supposed to be. Sometimes I feel like we should have never gone this far, but then I contradict myself by thinking that we belong like this. Maybe not forever, but for now. In this moment, right now, it feels oddly right."
I stared into his eyes as he spoke. His every word mesmerized me. The way he spoke left me in awe, wanting him to continue with his amazing words.
"Never in my life, or death for that matter, have I felt this way. It's as if I am living a whole new life as a different person. And if this is what it takes just to lye with my mistakes and live with what I did to you, all the hell I put you through then I will do it. I will stay with you as long as I can, living every memorable moment with you. I have never felt so much alive in my immortal life. And there was hope in me that I could take you there. But damn it, you're so young. I would never dream of taking your amazing life away from you."
As I looked in his eyes I saw frustration. He was frustrated with himself for having such thoughts. We had talked about me changing, and his answer was always the same. No. I hated to see how much emotional pain it put him through to think of me becoming a vampire. He loved by blush, how I ate and everything that made me, well, human.
"Edward, I love you." I grabbed his face with my hands. "Don't you ever forget that. No matter how much I pressure you into changing me, I know you are not ready for it. No matter what, I will love you." As the final words slipped from my lips, he kissed me with more passion than ever before. It was as if what I had said had verified our relationship. I felt all of his tension release into the kiss, making me feel breathless.
We finally separated, and I finally caught my breath. Edward moved his face closer to mind, stopping as his lips were over my ear, and he whispered. "You are amazing." Heat flew to my cheeks. I was so embarrassed. He ran his lips in small kisses from my cheek down to my jaw. "I love you." He told me. I nodded, and finally felt exhaustion set in.
"Go to sleep Bella." And I didn't have to respond, I just drifted to sleep.