Life Sucks
By: Honolulu
Authors Note: Chibi Chingo, I can understand why you're angry but if you continue you reading my story I will explain a lot of things to you. First of all, it is possible for a person to suppress their pain like Maria did. I know for I've seen it myself, my friend broke his wrist and the bone was sticking out but he didn't scream or cry but he was in great pain. He thought of anything except the pain. That's what I do when I get punched when I get into a fight. Second, it is possible to for Maria to pull the arrow out herself, true it's not very common but not impossible. I remember that elves have special senses, they have great sight, light feet, great stamina, manage to stay very clean (though it isn't really a sense), are immortal (not really, they can die) and some other elves might be gifted with a talent of being an empath, healing skills or be granted powers like Galadriel and much more. I will explain in this chapter on why Legolas and Aragorn didn't realize Maria was wounded.
It's also possible for the tips on the arrows to be poisoned, don't forget that orcs and goblins are the foul creatures shooting at them. If it's possible to have a sword laced with poison, why not an arrow? Yes, I do realize the story does seem overly dramatic and unrealistic but sometimes it must be done to get a point across or the author's imagination runs away from them. Look at soap operas, perfect example. Now I hope I haven't angered you by trying to defend and explain myself to you. I wouldn't want to lose a reader over this. I like to thank you for your criticism though, it's been very useful. I hope you want to continue my story and see how I've planned things to happen. If you want to review, even better. -Honolulu
Authors Note: Now to the rest of you readers, thank you for your reviews. I'm also warning you that I might put some smut in the near future, I haven't decided on that yet. But if I do, I will warn those who don't wish to read it so they can skip it and read the rest of the chapter. Some of you tell me that you don't like Maria's swearing, I'll try to tone it down but you see at school I'm surrounded by kids who cuss ten times worse than Maria and I guess it rubbed off me, sorry. Some have reviewed me telling me about how I keep switching to present and past tense, I know I have difficulties sometimes which is why I'm asking if anyone will be willing to become my beta-reader. Let me know by review or email me. Now with that all said and done, let's get on with the story.
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Legolas and Aragorn paced outside of the room Maria was held in. The healers wouldn't allow them entrance because they would distract them from the task at hand. Often screams would erupt from the room making them jump. " Why did she not tell us she was hurt?" Legolas spoke.
" I don't know why but I will find out. I feel like a fool for not realizing she was in pain and that she was lying." Aragorn said while clutching his hands tightly. Legolas placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him.
" You are not the only one who feels this way my friend. I was the first to notice the blood but my mind was elsewhere that I did not pay attention to her actions or notice the warnings." As they spoke Haldir slipped out of the healers room and listened to their conversation. Legolas turned when he felt his presence.
" Haldir, how is she? What is happening?" Aragorn quickly asked.
" The healers are allowing you to come inside but I do warn you that you won't like what you will see or hear." Haldir said and opened the door. Legolas and Aragorn rushed inside to see three elves sitting on a bed next to Maria's prone body. " This is Luthien, Linwe, and Calanor. They tended to Lady Maria."
" How is she?" Legolas asked. Calanor turned from his position on the bed to look at him.
" Your friend is not doing to well. We could not draw all the poison from her bloodstream. We were going to drain her a little to allow the poison to leak out but she's already lost too much blood. The poison will have to run its course, it is up to your friend to fight it. Luckily her wound was not infected or more damage would've been done. She was smart enough to wrap her shoulder. We've sealed the wound, she's beyond our help now." He told them.
" Besides that, what else are you trying to say?" Aragorn asked, his face pale.
" Your friend is dying, it would very much surprise me if she lasts the night." Linwe spoke. Calanor and Luthien were blocking their view of Maria. Legolas and Aragorn slowly moved around the bed and blanched at the sight of their friend. Maria was pale as a ghost, her breathing labored and shallow. Her face was sheen from sweat, her hands clammy and cold. They looked at her shoulder to see a star shaped scar. Maria was naked under the sheets, only her shoulders and up exposed to them. Linwe, Calanor and Luthien moved from the bedside so Legolas and Aragorn could sit next to her. Haldir ushered themselves out to give them some time alone. Aragorn kneeled by the bed and placed his hands together against his forehead as if praying. Tears streaming down his face.
Legolas sat down next to her and grabbed one of her hands. He almost dropped it after feeling how cold she was. He kissed the palm of her hand and laced his fingers through her's. They just sat there for awhile, neither speaking. Aragorn soon rose to his feet and spoke breaking the silence. " I should tell the others what has happened."
" I will stay here." Legolas spoke so softly Aragorn had a hard time hearing him. Nodding, Aragorn walked out. Legolas just watched her when his mind went back to when they were still in Rivendell and he was having a conversation with Maria about fears.
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" Legolas?"
" Yes Maria."
" What do you fear?" She asked. He looked at her.
" What do you mean?"
" Aren't you scared of anything? Are you afraid of death, an animal, closed places? Stuff like that." She clarified.
" I don't think I fear anything but I guess I'm afraid of losing a loved one. How about you?"
" Me? There are two things that I fear the most, silence and dying alone. I hate being alone."
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Legolas tightened his hold on her hand. " I'm here Maria, you're not alone." He whispered, hoping she could hear him.
Nearly four days passed by and Maria was still unconscious. The only movement that would come from her would be breathing, her moans, screams and tremors from the poison going through her system. Legolas spent most of his time just watching her. The rest of the fellowship would often come visit and sit for a little while.
Aragorn and Haldir entered the room to see Legolas sitting beside the bed once again. Aragorn placed a hand on his shoulder. " Legolas, come take a walk with us. Do anything but sit in this room. You've hardly eaten anything and Maria would not want you to starve to death." He said.
" No, I want to be here when she wakes up." Legolas told them. Aragorn sighed and sat down on the other side of the bed. Haldir watched his old friends and spoke up.
" Since you refuse to leave her side. Tell me about her, tell me what makes her so special. It's obvious that the three of you have deeper bonds then the rest of the fellowship." At this Legolas and Aragorn gave a small smile.
" We met Maria soon after the council in Rivendell. It was a strange meeting, she had bruises and cuts on her face. Even before we met her, she had caused such a ruckus. Not soon after we became friends." Aragorn said.
" Why did she have cuts and bruises on her face?" Haldir asked.
" From what we were told from her and Lord Elrond, Maria was found unconscious near two dead orcs. Maria was confronted with these orcs, fought them and defeated them but not without some repercussions." Legolas explained. At this information, Haldir's eyes widened.
" You have a interesting friend indeed. Tell me more of her." Legolas and Aragorn gladly told Haldir stories of their time in Rivendell. Aragorn was telling him the story of when Maria had gotten her revenge on them.
" Maria had help from Arwen, Celeste, Gandalf and the hobbits. She dyed our clothes pink, my hair turned orange while Legolas' turned blue. Our hair stayed like that for two days." Haldir broke out into a smile.
" Oh, please. You two so deserved it." A small voice called out. All three of them whipped their heads around to see Maria looking at them with a small smile. Legolas and Aragorn each took one of her hands. " Hi." She spoke softly.
" How are you feeling?" Aragorn asked.
" Like I've been runned over by a truck who then went in reverse and did it again." Haldir looked at her oddly while Legolas and Aragorn just shook their heads, they were use to Maria's strange sayings. Legolas handed her a cup of water which she quickly drunk it down. " How long have I been out?"
" Four days." Legolas answered.
" Four days? At least it's better than being knocked out for five days like last time."
" I'm just glad that you're awake." She smiled at him.
" Haldir, could you leave us? We would like to speak to Maria privately." Aragorn asked.
" Of course." Maria looked at Legolas and Aragorn.
" Uh oh. I don't like the sound of this private conversation." Just as the Haldir closed the door Maria winced at the intensity of their stares.
" Maria, I know that you must be tired but could you kindly explain to us why you didn't tell any of us you were injured."
" And why you lied to me when I asked you if you were hurt." Legolas said. Maria averted her eyes elsewhere. " Please answer us."
" I know it was very stupid of me not to tell anyone of you that I was hurt but I didn't want to worry anyone else. We already lost Gandalf and I didn't want to bring more tension into the situation. I figured that when we would arrive in Lothlorien I would seek help from the healers. You were tired and leading us to Lothlorien and I didn't want to be a bother Aragorn. Legolas, I saw how the grief of Gandalf's death was taking its toll on you, I didn't want to cause any more pain. I was hoping none of you would find out." Aragorn rubbed his forehead warily.
" I know you were trying to help but you made the situation worse Maria. You made all of us worry about you. All of us were afraid that we were going to lose another friend. You almost died! Did you know that the arrow was poisoned? It was only by a miracle you've survived, even the healers were sure that you wouldn't last through the night." Aragorn told her. Maria bowed her head in shame.
" I didn't know the arrow was poisoned or otherwise I would've said something. I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused. I won't do it again."
" Your apology isn't good enough Maria."
" Then what do you want me to do?" She asked.
" I want you to promise me that if you're hurt in anyway, you will tell us. Even if it's just a scratch. Promise me this." She looked up at him.
" I promise." Aragorn nodded.
" Thank you. I should inform the others that you've awakened. I trust that you will stay here Legolas." Legolas nodded his head. Aragorn kissed Maria on the forehead, she smiled at him and watched him leave the room. When the door shut she looked at Legolas. His head was down, his thumb stroking her hand.
" You're angry at me." He shook his head. " Disappointed?" He shook his head again. " Then what?"
" I'm angry at myself."
" What? Why?"
" I'm angry at myself because I was so focused in with my own problems I didn't realize that you were lying and that you were hurt."
" Legolas, it's not your fault. It's all my fault, I should've told you guys and I should've been honest. Don't blame yourself for this or I'm going to feel even more guilty. I already promised Aragorn that this won't happen again. To make error is human, to make the same error is stupidity. So let's just put this behind us. Okay?" Legolas nodded. " Good. So, how is Frodo?" She asked.
" Very quiet, quieter than usual. If it wasn't for the rest of the hobbits, I'm not sure how he would pull through." Maria opened her mouth to say something when the door burst opened. The next thing she knows, she was pinned down to the bed by arms and legs. She looked down to see all the hobbits hugging a part of her body. Pippin was hugging a leg, Merry had her torso, Sam had a arm and Frodo had his head on one of her shoulders.
" Hey guys. It's nice to see you too." All she got for an answer was that the hobbits tightened their hold on her. She looked up to see Boromir smiling at her, Gimli glaring at her and Aragorn giving Legolas a hand from his position on the floor where the hobbits pushed him aside to get to her. Boromir walked up to her and gave her a slight jab on the head. " Oi! What was that for?" She asked, rubbing the spot on her head.
" That was for making us go crazy with worry over you. Don't do it again." He told her with a smile. She winced at the bump on her head.
" Don't worry, I won't."
" Aye lass, you better listen to what he says. Either put us out of our misery and die or don't get injured at all. I don't want to be in a situation like that ever again." Gimli told her.
" O-kay." She answered, not to sure how to take his response. " So, how's Lothlorien?" Merry and Pippin gladly told her their explorations around Lorien. Maria soaked up their stories. The fellowship spent most of the day speaking with Maria. Merry was telling her about the differences between Rivendell and Lorien when Legolas noticed that Maria was trying to stay awake. He caught Aragorn's eye, Aragorn nodded and spoke up.
" I think it's time to leave Maria alone. She needs her rest, we'll come back to visit soon." Aragorn ushered them out of the room.
" Thanks for telling them to leave. I wanted to fall asleep but I didn't want to be rude so I tried to stay awake to listen to them. All this drama today has taken a toll on my body." Maria told Legolas.
" Did you want anything before I leave?" She shook her head. " I shall be back in the morning." He kissed her on the forehead and left. Maria didn't go to sleep immediately though. She lie down on her bed and thought about all the events from the past days. She thought about Gandalf's death mostly. Surprising her that she didn't shed any tears. ' Or maybe I am all out of tears.' She thought before closing her eyes and catching some z's.
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Two days passed and Maria was in her bed arguing with Aragorn and Legolas. She wanted to get up and explore around Lorien while Legolas and Aragorn wanted her to stay in bed and rest some more. " Oh come on guys! I've been in bed for six days! I want some stimulation in my legs and I'm bored stiff in this room."
" Maria, you've just recovered from a serious wound, you should get some rest." Aragorn said.
" I've been resting for the past two days, now I'm restless. Whether you like it or not, I am going to get out of this bed. Now you have two options, you two can either accept that fact and help me or you can stay stubborn while I get out of this bed by myself. Either way I'm getting out of this room. So gentlemen, which option will you choose? One or two?" Legolas and Aragorn just stared at her, frustrated with her stubbornness. They just nodded and moved to help her out of the bed.
Maria smiled at her success and tightened the sheets around her nude form. Aragorn had her left arm around his shoulders and Legolas with her right. They lifted her off the bed and onto the floor. Maria stood shakily on her feet, she tried to get use to the weight on her feet since she hasn't used her legs in six days. She slowly took steps with Aragorn and Legolas by her side. After a few minutes she started to take larger strides.
Maria was too busy trying to walk she didn't pay much attention to the bed sheets until she tripped on them. The bed sheets were much bigger than Maria so in the process of trying to walk she stepped on piece of the sheet. Pulling her to the floor and the sheet off her body. Legolas and Aragorn moved to help her. " No! Don't help me! Just turn around! I don't want you to see me naked. Turn around!" Legolas and Aragorn quickly turned their backs to her as she got up.
Maria moved to grab the sheet when Haldir and the healers walked in. She quickly jumped behind Legolas and Aragorn to block her body from their view. " Geez, ever heard of knocking?" She muttered under her breath.
" What is going on in here? We heard a crashing noise out side." Haldir told them.
" Oh, that would be me tripping and hitting the ground. Nothing to worry about I assure you." She told them.
" You should be in bed Lady Maria." Calanor spoke up.
" No I don't. I've had enough rest. No matter what any of you say I'm not going back to bed." Haldir noticed that she spoke from behind Legolas and Aragorn.
" Milady, why don't you speak to us face to face?" He asked. Legolas and Aragorn smiled.
" Um… you see….what had happened was….um…" Maria stuttered trying to answer him. Aragorn swallowed down some laughter.
" Maria was trying to walk around the room with a sheet wrapped around her body. Her trip to the floor caused her to lose the sheet and she doesn't want you to see her nude form." Legolas gracefully answered for her. The healers stifled their laughter while Haldir just raised an eyebrow.
" You don't have to be so modest Lady Maria. Who do you think had to remove your clothing when the healers tried to tend to your wound?" Haldir said. At this new information Legolas stopped smiling and frowned at Haldir. " You have nothing to be embarrassed about."
" You saw me in my birthday suit?" Was all she said. To make the situation worse, the hobbits walked into the room. The hobbits could see Maria's legs from behind Legolas and Aragorn.
" What's going on in here?" Merry asked.
" Jesus! Doesn't anybody ever knock around here?" Maria grumbled. She stood on the tips of her toes to look over Legolas shoulder. " Can you guys come back in a little bit?" She directed her question to the hobbits. Not understanding what was going on, the hobbits just nodded and left. " Haldir, you may have already seen my body but that doesn't mean I want you to see it again. You elves may not care about nudity and all that stuff but us humans sure do. Right Aragorn?" This time Haldir chuckled.
" I don't know if Estel told you Lady Maria but Aragorn was raised amongst the elves. He is use to the elvish ways." Haldir informed her.
" Of all the time we spent together in Rivendell Aragorn, you didn't bother to disclose this information to me."
" I'm sure I told you Maria but I'm sure you were busy tuning out my stories." Aragorn retorted.
" Oops! Sorry! But that's beside the point, can you four please leave?" She asked the healers and Haldir. They nodded and left, closing the door behind them. Maria sighed in relief. " Okay this is what we're were going to do. Stand shoulder to shoulder." Following her instructions Legolas and Aragorn moved closer to each other. " Okay, the sheet is a couple feet away on your right. All of us are going to walk over to the sheet, you two shielding me just in case any one else decides to come visit. On three, 1...2...3!"
They moved to the sheet, Maria quickly scooped it up and wrapped herself in it. " Alright, now I'm going to go take a bath and put some clothes on. I'll meet you outside in about an hour. Now boot out." They left the room allowing Maria some time to herself. She walked inside the bathroom and locked the door. She looked around the room to see a bathtub full of water ready for her. She removed the sheet and sat in the tub.
She took her time to wash her hair and scrub her body. She enjoyed the time alone from everyone and took a breather. She got caught up in her thoughts again. She soon exited the tub and wiped herself down with a towel. She wrapped the towel around her body and looked herself in the mirror. She fingered the new scar on her shoulder that resembled a star. " Another scar to add to the collection." She murmured, she sighed and walked out.
She couldn't find her bag or her clothes so she searched through the drawers and dressers for some clothes to wear. All she found were dresses. She cursed and looked at them. " Let see, we have white, white, white, more white. Oh look! Silver!" She grabbed a dress with the less strings, bows, and frills and slipped it on. It was a simple white dress with long belled sleeves and a tight bodice. The dress was quite snug on her and had a long train since she wasn't an elf. " I hate dresses." She mumbled. After brushing her hair she went outside to meet up with Aragorn and Legolas.
" Maria, you're wearing…" She cut Legolas off.
" Don't even say a word." Legolas and Aragorn just smiled at each other. They each offered her their arm.
" Allow us to show you Lothlorien." Aragorn said. She slipped an arm around each of theirs an walked off.
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Legolas and Aragorn showed Maria around Lorien. Her gawking at the beauty of it all. Around dinner time Legolas and Aragorn were called to speak with Lord Celeborn. They escorted Maria back to her room and left. Maria soon became restless once again and slipped out of her room. She was exploring the gardens when she noticed a hobbit not to far away. She walked closer and noticed it was Frodo. " Frodo?" She called out.
He looked up and Maria noticed his eyes were puffy and red. She walked up to him and kneeled down to be eye to eye. " Have you been crying?" Frodo turned to face away from her. " Is it about Gandalf?"
" If your looking for someone to be in company with, Sam and the others are near the trees over there." He told her.
" Are you alright Frodo?" She asked
" Just leave me alone." He walked up to a bench and sat down. She rose to her feet and sat down next to him on the bench. She placed a hand on his shoulder only to have him shrug it off. She laced her fingers together and sat them down in her lap.
" I'm pretty sure people have come up to you and said ' I understand, I know what you're going through,' but you know that they don't. They didn't know Gandalf as well as you did, they don't know how close you were. I hate to say this to you but I do understand and I know what you're going through. I understand because I went through the same thing when I lost my parents. Friends and students came up to me saying that they understand what's going on but how could they? They still had their parents while mine where gone and never coming back. I didn't lose one loved one, I lost two which was even worst."
" How did you get over it? Get over the pain?" He asked.
" You don't really get over it, it will always be painful but you come to accept it. You accept what fate set out and deal with it. A way to help is talk about it and instead of thinking about their death, think about all the good memories you had with that person." She stopped to let the words sink in. Maria heard sniffling and turned to look at him. Tears were streaming down his face. She enveloped him into a hug.
" I wish I could've just said goodbye." Frodo told her.
" There is a way you can." He looked up at her.
" How?"
" I want you to pick some flowers that you like, if Gandalf had a favorite flower pick them as well." She instructed him. Frodo got off the bench and picked a bunch of flowers from the gardens. He walked back to her after he finished. " Follow me." She led him up the stairs on the trees, she took him to a spot where Legolas and Aragorn showed her earlier. From their high point in the trees, they could see the sun setting and the river. They leaned against the rails. " This is what you do, you can either take a whole flower or just petal by petal, you whisper what you wanted to say and toss it into the wind. You can whisper a goodbye, any words , a memory or even sing a song."
" Alright, but there's no wind."
" Don't worry about it. I'll even do a song for you." She took two flowers from his arms. " Ready? Go." Maria watched Frodo start then she joined him. She plucked a petal and tossed it into the air as she started to sing.
Every now and then
We find a special friend
who never lets us down...
Who understands it all
reaches out each time we fall
you're the best friend I have found...
The wind started to pick up, Maria watched the petals dance in the breeze.
I know you can't stay
a part of you will never ever go away
your heart will stay.....
I'll make a wish for you,
and hope it will come true,
if life will just be kind,
to such a gentle mind,
if you lose your way,
think back on yesterday
remember me this way,
remember me this way.
Unbeknownst to them, they had an audience. Most of them elves. Haldir was walking to his flat when his ears picked up the song. He stood with a bunch of elves watching the two.
I don't need eyes to see
the love you bring to me,
no matter where I go
and I know that you'll be there
forever-more a part of me and everywhere
I'll always care.....
I'll make a wish for you
and hope it will come true,
if life will just be kind,
to such a gentle mind,
and if you lose your way
think back on yesterday
remember me this way,
remember me this way.
and I'll be right behind your shoulder, watching you
I'll be standing by your side, all you do
and I won't ever leave
as long as you believe,
you just believe....
I'll make a wish for you
and hope it will come true
if life will just be kind
to such a gentle mind
and if you lose your way
think back on yesterday
remember me this way
remember me this way.
o.....
this way.
" Feel better?" She asked as they finished. Frodo turned to look at her with a smile on his face.
" Yes, I feel much better. Thank you." Frodo said. She smiled at him.
" No problem."
" I'm going to go down now. I don't really like heights." She nodded and he practically ran down the stairs to get to the ground. Maria lifted her hand to see a tulip in her hand. She plucked the flower until all she had was petals. She started to sing again while tossing the petals into the breeze. The last rays of the sun playing on her hair and face.
And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that it'll be ok,
Ya I try to believe you,
But I don't
When you say that it's gonna be,
It always turns out to be a different way,
I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...
I don't know how I'll feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day
It's always been up to you,
It's turning around,
It's up to me,
I'm gonna do what I have to do,
just don't
Gimme a little time,
Leave me alone a little while,
Maybe it's not too late,
not today, today, today, today, today...
I don't know how I'll feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, and I know I'm not ready,
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, maybe tomorrow
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, and I know I'm not ready,
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, maybe tomorrow
And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that it'll be ok,
Yeah I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...
Tomorrow it may change
Tomorrow it may change
Tomorrow it may change
Tomorrow it may change
Maria kissed the last petal and let it loose. She watched it until she could no longer see it. She looked at the sky to see the stars coming out. She sighed and walked back to her room. A dozen pair of eyes following her.
To be continued….
Disclaimer: The first song belongs to Jordan Hill, ' Remember me this way' and the second song belongs to Avril Lavigne, 'Tomorrow'.
Authors Note: Sorry for the long wait. My muse was shot and I've been struggling to write this chapter. I hope you like it, let me know by reviewing!
By: Honolulu
Authors Note: Chibi Chingo, I can understand why you're angry but if you continue you reading my story I will explain a lot of things to you. First of all, it is possible for a person to suppress their pain like Maria did. I know for I've seen it myself, my friend broke his wrist and the bone was sticking out but he didn't scream or cry but he was in great pain. He thought of anything except the pain. That's what I do when I get punched when I get into a fight. Second, it is possible to for Maria to pull the arrow out herself, true it's not very common but not impossible. I remember that elves have special senses, they have great sight, light feet, great stamina, manage to stay very clean (though it isn't really a sense), are immortal (not really, they can die) and some other elves might be gifted with a talent of being an empath, healing skills or be granted powers like Galadriel and much more. I will explain in this chapter on why Legolas and Aragorn didn't realize Maria was wounded.
It's also possible for the tips on the arrows to be poisoned, don't forget that orcs and goblins are the foul creatures shooting at them. If it's possible to have a sword laced with poison, why not an arrow? Yes, I do realize the story does seem overly dramatic and unrealistic but sometimes it must be done to get a point across or the author's imagination runs away from them. Look at soap operas, perfect example. Now I hope I haven't angered you by trying to defend and explain myself to you. I wouldn't want to lose a reader over this. I like to thank you for your criticism though, it's been very useful. I hope you want to continue my story and see how I've planned things to happen. If you want to review, even better. -Honolulu
Authors Note: Now to the rest of you readers, thank you for your reviews. I'm also warning you that I might put some smut in the near future, I haven't decided on that yet. But if I do, I will warn those who don't wish to read it so they can skip it and read the rest of the chapter. Some of you tell me that you don't like Maria's swearing, I'll try to tone it down but you see at school I'm surrounded by kids who cuss ten times worse than Maria and I guess it rubbed off me, sorry. Some have reviewed me telling me about how I keep switching to present and past tense, I know I have difficulties sometimes which is why I'm asking if anyone will be willing to become my beta-reader. Let me know by review or email me. Now with that all said and done, let's get on with the story.
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Legolas and Aragorn paced outside of the room Maria was held in. The healers wouldn't allow them entrance because they would distract them from the task at hand. Often screams would erupt from the room making them jump. " Why did she not tell us she was hurt?" Legolas spoke.
" I don't know why but I will find out. I feel like a fool for not realizing she was in pain and that she was lying." Aragorn said while clutching his hands tightly. Legolas placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him.
" You are not the only one who feels this way my friend. I was the first to notice the blood but my mind was elsewhere that I did not pay attention to her actions or notice the warnings." As they spoke Haldir slipped out of the healers room and listened to their conversation. Legolas turned when he felt his presence.
" Haldir, how is she? What is happening?" Aragorn quickly asked.
" The healers are allowing you to come inside but I do warn you that you won't like what you will see or hear." Haldir said and opened the door. Legolas and Aragorn rushed inside to see three elves sitting on a bed next to Maria's prone body. " This is Luthien, Linwe, and Calanor. They tended to Lady Maria."
" How is she?" Legolas asked. Calanor turned from his position on the bed to look at him.
" Your friend is not doing to well. We could not draw all the poison from her bloodstream. We were going to drain her a little to allow the poison to leak out but she's already lost too much blood. The poison will have to run its course, it is up to your friend to fight it. Luckily her wound was not infected or more damage would've been done. She was smart enough to wrap her shoulder. We've sealed the wound, she's beyond our help now." He told them.
" Besides that, what else are you trying to say?" Aragorn asked, his face pale.
" Your friend is dying, it would very much surprise me if she lasts the night." Linwe spoke. Calanor and Luthien were blocking their view of Maria. Legolas and Aragorn slowly moved around the bed and blanched at the sight of their friend. Maria was pale as a ghost, her breathing labored and shallow. Her face was sheen from sweat, her hands clammy and cold. They looked at her shoulder to see a star shaped scar. Maria was naked under the sheets, only her shoulders and up exposed to them. Linwe, Calanor and Luthien moved from the bedside so Legolas and Aragorn could sit next to her. Haldir ushered themselves out to give them some time alone. Aragorn kneeled by the bed and placed his hands together against his forehead as if praying. Tears streaming down his face.
Legolas sat down next to her and grabbed one of her hands. He almost dropped it after feeling how cold she was. He kissed the palm of her hand and laced his fingers through her's. They just sat there for awhile, neither speaking. Aragorn soon rose to his feet and spoke breaking the silence. " I should tell the others what has happened."
" I will stay here." Legolas spoke so softly Aragorn had a hard time hearing him. Nodding, Aragorn walked out. Legolas just watched her when his mind went back to when they were still in Rivendell and he was having a conversation with Maria about fears.
************************
" Legolas?"
" Yes Maria."
" What do you fear?" She asked. He looked at her.
" What do you mean?"
" Aren't you scared of anything? Are you afraid of death, an animal, closed places? Stuff like that." She clarified.
" I don't think I fear anything but I guess I'm afraid of losing a loved one. How about you?"
" Me? There are two things that I fear the most, silence and dying alone. I hate being alone."
************************
Legolas tightened his hold on her hand. " I'm here Maria, you're not alone." He whispered, hoping she could hear him.
Nearly four days passed by and Maria was still unconscious. The only movement that would come from her would be breathing, her moans, screams and tremors from the poison going through her system. Legolas spent most of his time just watching her. The rest of the fellowship would often come visit and sit for a little while.
Aragorn and Haldir entered the room to see Legolas sitting beside the bed once again. Aragorn placed a hand on his shoulder. " Legolas, come take a walk with us. Do anything but sit in this room. You've hardly eaten anything and Maria would not want you to starve to death." He said.
" No, I want to be here when she wakes up." Legolas told them. Aragorn sighed and sat down on the other side of the bed. Haldir watched his old friends and spoke up.
" Since you refuse to leave her side. Tell me about her, tell me what makes her so special. It's obvious that the three of you have deeper bonds then the rest of the fellowship." At this Legolas and Aragorn gave a small smile.
" We met Maria soon after the council in Rivendell. It was a strange meeting, she had bruises and cuts on her face. Even before we met her, she had caused such a ruckus. Not soon after we became friends." Aragorn said.
" Why did she have cuts and bruises on her face?" Haldir asked.
" From what we were told from her and Lord Elrond, Maria was found unconscious near two dead orcs. Maria was confronted with these orcs, fought them and defeated them but not without some repercussions." Legolas explained. At this information, Haldir's eyes widened.
" You have a interesting friend indeed. Tell me more of her." Legolas and Aragorn gladly told Haldir stories of their time in Rivendell. Aragorn was telling him the story of when Maria had gotten her revenge on them.
" Maria had help from Arwen, Celeste, Gandalf and the hobbits. She dyed our clothes pink, my hair turned orange while Legolas' turned blue. Our hair stayed like that for two days." Haldir broke out into a smile.
" Oh, please. You two so deserved it." A small voice called out. All three of them whipped their heads around to see Maria looking at them with a small smile. Legolas and Aragorn each took one of her hands. " Hi." She spoke softly.
" How are you feeling?" Aragorn asked.
" Like I've been runned over by a truck who then went in reverse and did it again." Haldir looked at her oddly while Legolas and Aragorn just shook their heads, they were use to Maria's strange sayings. Legolas handed her a cup of water which she quickly drunk it down. " How long have I been out?"
" Four days." Legolas answered.
" Four days? At least it's better than being knocked out for five days like last time."
" I'm just glad that you're awake." She smiled at him.
" Haldir, could you leave us? We would like to speak to Maria privately." Aragorn asked.
" Of course." Maria looked at Legolas and Aragorn.
" Uh oh. I don't like the sound of this private conversation." Just as the Haldir closed the door Maria winced at the intensity of their stares.
" Maria, I know that you must be tired but could you kindly explain to us why you didn't tell any of us you were injured."
" And why you lied to me when I asked you if you were hurt." Legolas said. Maria averted her eyes elsewhere. " Please answer us."
" I know it was very stupid of me not to tell anyone of you that I was hurt but I didn't want to worry anyone else. We already lost Gandalf and I didn't want to bring more tension into the situation. I figured that when we would arrive in Lothlorien I would seek help from the healers. You were tired and leading us to Lothlorien and I didn't want to be a bother Aragorn. Legolas, I saw how the grief of Gandalf's death was taking its toll on you, I didn't want to cause any more pain. I was hoping none of you would find out." Aragorn rubbed his forehead warily.
" I know you were trying to help but you made the situation worse Maria. You made all of us worry about you. All of us were afraid that we were going to lose another friend. You almost died! Did you know that the arrow was poisoned? It was only by a miracle you've survived, even the healers were sure that you wouldn't last through the night." Aragorn told her. Maria bowed her head in shame.
" I didn't know the arrow was poisoned or otherwise I would've said something. I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused. I won't do it again."
" Your apology isn't good enough Maria."
" Then what do you want me to do?" She asked.
" I want you to promise me that if you're hurt in anyway, you will tell us. Even if it's just a scratch. Promise me this." She looked up at him.
" I promise." Aragorn nodded.
" Thank you. I should inform the others that you've awakened. I trust that you will stay here Legolas." Legolas nodded his head. Aragorn kissed Maria on the forehead, she smiled at him and watched him leave the room. When the door shut she looked at Legolas. His head was down, his thumb stroking her hand.
" You're angry at me." He shook his head. " Disappointed?" He shook his head again. " Then what?"
" I'm angry at myself."
" What? Why?"
" I'm angry at myself because I was so focused in with my own problems I didn't realize that you were lying and that you were hurt."
" Legolas, it's not your fault. It's all my fault, I should've told you guys and I should've been honest. Don't blame yourself for this or I'm going to feel even more guilty. I already promised Aragorn that this won't happen again. To make error is human, to make the same error is stupidity. So let's just put this behind us. Okay?" Legolas nodded. " Good. So, how is Frodo?" She asked.
" Very quiet, quieter than usual. If it wasn't for the rest of the hobbits, I'm not sure how he would pull through." Maria opened her mouth to say something when the door burst opened. The next thing she knows, she was pinned down to the bed by arms and legs. She looked down to see all the hobbits hugging a part of her body. Pippin was hugging a leg, Merry had her torso, Sam had a arm and Frodo had his head on one of her shoulders.
" Hey guys. It's nice to see you too." All she got for an answer was that the hobbits tightened their hold on her. She looked up to see Boromir smiling at her, Gimli glaring at her and Aragorn giving Legolas a hand from his position on the floor where the hobbits pushed him aside to get to her. Boromir walked up to her and gave her a slight jab on the head. " Oi! What was that for?" She asked, rubbing the spot on her head.
" That was for making us go crazy with worry over you. Don't do it again." He told her with a smile. She winced at the bump on her head.
" Don't worry, I won't."
" Aye lass, you better listen to what he says. Either put us out of our misery and die or don't get injured at all. I don't want to be in a situation like that ever again." Gimli told her.
" O-kay." She answered, not to sure how to take his response. " So, how's Lothlorien?" Merry and Pippin gladly told her their explorations around Lorien. Maria soaked up their stories. The fellowship spent most of the day speaking with Maria. Merry was telling her about the differences between Rivendell and Lorien when Legolas noticed that Maria was trying to stay awake. He caught Aragorn's eye, Aragorn nodded and spoke up.
" I think it's time to leave Maria alone. She needs her rest, we'll come back to visit soon." Aragorn ushered them out of the room.
" Thanks for telling them to leave. I wanted to fall asleep but I didn't want to be rude so I tried to stay awake to listen to them. All this drama today has taken a toll on my body." Maria told Legolas.
" Did you want anything before I leave?" She shook her head. " I shall be back in the morning." He kissed her on the forehead and left. Maria didn't go to sleep immediately though. She lie down on her bed and thought about all the events from the past days. She thought about Gandalf's death mostly. Surprising her that she didn't shed any tears. ' Or maybe I am all out of tears.' She thought before closing her eyes and catching some z's.
*********************
Two days passed and Maria was in her bed arguing with Aragorn and Legolas. She wanted to get up and explore around Lorien while Legolas and Aragorn wanted her to stay in bed and rest some more. " Oh come on guys! I've been in bed for six days! I want some stimulation in my legs and I'm bored stiff in this room."
" Maria, you've just recovered from a serious wound, you should get some rest." Aragorn said.
" I've been resting for the past two days, now I'm restless. Whether you like it or not, I am going to get out of this bed. Now you have two options, you two can either accept that fact and help me or you can stay stubborn while I get out of this bed by myself. Either way I'm getting out of this room. So gentlemen, which option will you choose? One or two?" Legolas and Aragorn just stared at her, frustrated with her stubbornness. They just nodded and moved to help her out of the bed.
Maria smiled at her success and tightened the sheets around her nude form. Aragorn had her left arm around his shoulders and Legolas with her right. They lifted her off the bed and onto the floor. Maria stood shakily on her feet, she tried to get use to the weight on her feet since she hasn't used her legs in six days. She slowly took steps with Aragorn and Legolas by her side. After a few minutes she started to take larger strides.
Maria was too busy trying to walk she didn't pay much attention to the bed sheets until she tripped on them. The bed sheets were much bigger than Maria so in the process of trying to walk she stepped on piece of the sheet. Pulling her to the floor and the sheet off her body. Legolas and Aragorn moved to help her. " No! Don't help me! Just turn around! I don't want you to see me naked. Turn around!" Legolas and Aragorn quickly turned their backs to her as she got up.
Maria moved to grab the sheet when Haldir and the healers walked in. She quickly jumped behind Legolas and Aragorn to block her body from their view. " Geez, ever heard of knocking?" She muttered under her breath.
" What is going on in here? We heard a crashing noise out side." Haldir told them.
" Oh, that would be me tripping and hitting the ground. Nothing to worry about I assure you." She told them.
" You should be in bed Lady Maria." Calanor spoke up.
" No I don't. I've had enough rest. No matter what any of you say I'm not going back to bed." Haldir noticed that she spoke from behind Legolas and Aragorn.
" Milady, why don't you speak to us face to face?" He asked. Legolas and Aragorn smiled.
" Um… you see….what had happened was….um…" Maria stuttered trying to answer him. Aragorn swallowed down some laughter.
" Maria was trying to walk around the room with a sheet wrapped around her body. Her trip to the floor caused her to lose the sheet and she doesn't want you to see her nude form." Legolas gracefully answered for her. The healers stifled their laughter while Haldir just raised an eyebrow.
" You don't have to be so modest Lady Maria. Who do you think had to remove your clothing when the healers tried to tend to your wound?" Haldir said. At this new information Legolas stopped smiling and frowned at Haldir. " You have nothing to be embarrassed about."
" You saw me in my birthday suit?" Was all she said. To make the situation worse, the hobbits walked into the room. The hobbits could see Maria's legs from behind Legolas and Aragorn.
" What's going on in here?" Merry asked.
" Jesus! Doesn't anybody ever knock around here?" Maria grumbled. She stood on the tips of her toes to look over Legolas shoulder. " Can you guys come back in a little bit?" She directed her question to the hobbits. Not understanding what was going on, the hobbits just nodded and left. " Haldir, you may have already seen my body but that doesn't mean I want you to see it again. You elves may not care about nudity and all that stuff but us humans sure do. Right Aragorn?" This time Haldir chuckled.
" I don't know if Estel told you Lady Maria but Aragorn was raised amongst the elves. He is use to the elvish ways." Haldir informed her.
" Of all the time we spent together in Rivendell Aragorn, you didn't bother to disclose this information to me."
" I'm sure I told you Maria but I'm sure you were busy tuning out my stories." Aragorn retorted.
" Oops! Sorry! But that's beside the point, can you four please leave?" She asked the healers and Haldir. They nodded and left, closing the door behind them. Maria sighed in relief. " Okay this is what we're were going to do. Stand shoulder to shoulder." Following her instructions Legolas and Aragorn moved closer to each other. " Okay, the sheet is a couple feet away on your right. All of us are going to walk over to the sheet, you two shielding me just in case any one else decides to come visit. On three, 1...2...3!"
They moved to the sheet, Maria quickly scooped it up and wrapped herself in it. " Alright, now I'm going to go take a bath and put some clothes on. I'll meet you outside in about an hour. Now boot out." They left the room allowing Maria some time to herself. She walked inside the bathroom and locked the door. She looked around the room to see a bathtub full of water ready for her. She removed the sheet and sat in the tub.
She took her time to wash her hair and scrub her body. She enjoyed the time alone from everyone and took a breather. She got caught up in her thoughts again. She soon exited the tub and wiped herself down with a towel. She wrapped the towel around her body and looked herself in the mirror. She fingered the new scar on her shoulder that resembled a star. " Another scar to add to the collection." She murmured, she sighed and walked out.
She couldn't find her bag or her clothes so she searched through the drawers and dressers for some clothes to wear. All she found were dresses. She cursed and looked at them. " Let see, we have white, white, white, more white. Oh look! Silver!" She grabbed a dress with the less strings, bows, and frills and slipped it on. It was a simple white dress with long belled sleeves and a tight bodice. The dress was quite snug on her and had a long train since she wasn't an elf. " I hate dresses." She mumbled. After brushing her hair she went outside to meet up with Aragorn and Legolas.
" Maria, you're wearing…" She cut Legolas off.
" Don't even say a word." Legolas and Aragorn just smiled at each other. They each offered her their arm.
" Allow us to show you Lothlorien." Aragorn said. She slipped an arm around each of theirs an walked off.
*************************
Legolas and Aragorn showed Maria around Lorien. Her gawking at the beauty of it all. Around dinner time Legolas and Aragorn were called to speak with Lord Celeborn. They escorted Maria back to her room and left. Maria soon became restless once again and slipped out of her room. She was exploring the gardens when she noticed a hobbit not to far away. She walked closer and noticed it was Frodo. " Frodo?" She called out.
He looked up and Maria noticed his eyes were puffy and red. She walked up to him and kneeled down to be eye to eye. " Have you been crying?" Frodo turned to face away from her. " Is it about Gandalf?"
" If your looking for someone to be in company with, Sam and the others are near the trees over there." He told her.
" Are you alright Frodo?" She asked
" Just leave me alone." He walked up to a bench and sat down. She rose to her feet and sat down next to him on the bench. She placed a hand on his shoulder only to have him shrug it off. She laced her fingers together and sat them down in her lap.
" I'm pretty sure people have come up to you and said ' I understand, I know what you're going through,' but you know that they don't. They didn't know Gandalf as well as you did, they don't know how close you were. I hate to say this to you but I do understand and I know what you're going through. I understand because I went through the same thing when I lost my parents. Friends and students came up to me saying that they understand what's going on but how could they? They still had their parents while mine where gone and never coming back. I didn't lose one loved one, I lost two which was even worst."
" How did you get over it? Get over the pain?" He asked.
" You don't really get over it, it will always be painful but you come to accept it. You accept what fate set out and deal with it. A way to help is talk about it and instead of thinking about their death, think about all the good memories you had with that person." She stopped to let the words sink in. Maria heard sniffling and turned to look at him. Tears were streaming down his face. She enveloped him into a hug.
" I wish I could've just said goodbye." Frodo told her.
" There is a way you can." He looked up at her.
" How?"
" I want you to pick some flowers that you like, if Gandalf had a favorite flower pick them as well." She instructed him. Frodo got off the bench and picked a bunch of flowers from the gardens. He walked back to her after he finished. " Follow me." She led him up the stairs on the trees, she took him to a spot where Legolas and Aragorn showed her earlier. From their high point in the trees, they could see the sun setting and the river. They leaned against the rails. " This is what you do, you can either take a whole flower or just petal by petal, you whisper what you wanted to say and toss it into the wind. You can whisper a goodbye, any words , a memory or even sing a song."
" Alright, but there's no wind."
" Don't worry about it. I'll even do a song for you." She took two flowers from his arms. " Ready? Go." Maria watched Frodo start then she joined him. She plucked a petal and tossed it into the air as she started to sing.
Every now and then
We find a special friend
who never lets us down...
Who understands it all
reaches out each time we fall
you're the best friend I have found...
The wind started to pick up, Maria watched the petals dance in the breeze.
I know you can't stay
a part of you will never ever go away
your heart will stay.....
I'll make a wish for you,
and hope it will come true,
if life will just be kind,
to such a gentle mind,
if you lose your way,
think back on yesterday
remember me this way,
remember me this way.
Unbeknownst to them, they had an audience. Most of them elves. Haldir was walking to his flat when his ears picked up the song. He stood with a bunch of elves watching the two.
I don't need eyes to see
the love you bring to me,
no matter where I go
and I know that you'll be there
forever-more a part of me and everywhere
I'll always care.....
I'll make a wish for you
and hope it will come true,
if life will just be kind,
to such a gentle mind,
and if you lose your way
think back on yesterday
remember me this way,
remember me this way.
and I'll be right behind your shoulder, watching you
I'll be standing by your side, all you do
and I won't ever leave
as long as you believe,
you just believe....
I'll make a wish for you
and hope it will come true
if life will just be kind
to such a gentle mind
and if you lose your way
think back on yesterday
remember me this way
remember me this way.
o.....
this way.
" Feel better?" She asked as they finished. Frodo turned to look at her with a smile on his face.
" Yes, I feel much better. Thank you." Frodo said. She smiled at him.
" No problem."
" I'm going to go down now. I don't really like heights." She nodded and he practically ran down the stairs to get to the ground. Maria lifted her hand to see a tulip in her hand. She plucked the flower until all she had was petals. She started to sing again while tossing the petals into the breeze. The last rays of the sun playing on her hair and face.
And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that it'll be ok,
Ya I try to believe you,
But I don't
When you say that it's gonna be,
It always turns out to be a different way,
I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...
I don't know how I'll feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day
It's always been up to you,
It's turning around,
It's up to me,
I'm gonna do what I have to do,
just don't
Gimme a little time,
Leave me alone a little while,
Maybe it's not too late,
not today, today, today, today, today...
I don't know how I'll feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, and I know I'm not ready,
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, maybe tomorrow
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, and I know I'm not ready,
Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, maybe tomorrow
And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that it'll be ok,
Yeah I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...
Tomorrow it may change
Tomorrow it may change
Tomorrow it may change
Tomorrow it may change
Maria kissed the last petal and let it loose. She watched it until she could no longer see it. She looked at the sky to see the stars coming out. She sighed and walked back to her room. A dozen pair of eyes following her.
To be continued….
Disclaimer: The first song belongs to Jordan Hill, ' Remember me this way' and the second song belongs to Avril Lavigne, 'Tomorrow'.
Authors Note: Sorry for the long wait. My muse was shot and I've been struggling to write this chapter. I hope you like it, let me know by reviewing!