Authors Note: Revised ending, begin from dream sequence if you don't want to read the chapter over again!

Life Sucks

By: Honolulu

Legolas and Aragorn walked into the main hall with Theoden and gazed about the room. The chairs and tables were being used as cots for the injured, many lay on the floor. The battle was over outside but still reign on the wounded. " I need more wrappings over here!" Maria's voice echoed in the room. Legolas pinpointed her; she stood over an old man who was crying in agony, bleeding profusely from a knife wound on his thigh. Two of her men worked with her as she tried cleaning and wrapping his leg, while they held down his arms and feet. He watched as she wiped back a loose strand of hair and instructed the men to take away the old man.

She didn't notice them until Theoden walked right up to her. " How is everything fairing here?" He asked.

" Not to well. I'm not a healer and I can only do so much for these people. I have two healers around here working on those who are critically injured. I need more help. Perhaps you can send some women here and help tend to those who need it the less."

" I will give what you ask. Is there anything else?"

" We need some more wrappi—" She was cut off as a scream erupted off of one the young boys. Maria ran over to him and saw Ryne hold the boy's arms down. " What happened?"

" I—I don't know! I was wiping down his face when he just started to shake!" He answered.

" WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM?" Maria looked up to see an older woman crying into the arms of who she assumed was her husband. " WHAT'S WRONG? HELP MY SON! PLEASE!"

" GET THEM OUTTA HERE!" Maria shouted to one of the guards. The husband with the help of a guard pulled his wife out of the room, her cries bouncing off the wall. " Ryne, where is he injured!"

" His hand! It's just a cut but he said he was feeling ill so I let him rest here." Ryne pulled the boys left hand to her. He was right, it was just a superficial scrape the only thing that kept her from agreeing with him was the look of his veins. They were more profuse and they were purple with a tint of blue. She pulled back the sleeve of the tunic and realized that it was spreading, making her realize that it was,

" Poison. Help me remove his tunic!" They tugged at his shirt but it was proving to be difficult with his convulsing. It became even worse when he stopped moving at all. Maria grabbed her dagger and ripped the tunic down the middle. She was surprised at how much it had spread. It traveled from the palm of his hand all the way to his shoulder, almost to his neck now. She placed two fingers on his pulse point and felt nothing. She placed her head on his chest and above his mouth and heard nothing. " Fuck!" The others began to watch as she placed her hands above his heart and started to push up and down hard. " 1,2,3,4,5…15" They heard her count and watched in a silent, morbid fascination as she tilted the young boy head back, close his nose and breathe down his mouth then continued the pulsing on his chest.

" 1,2,3,4,5…15 /breathe/…come on damn it! 1,2,3,4,5…15 /breathe/…1,2,3---" She nearly jumped back as the boy began to breathe once more, his heart beating again. Maria took out the string holding her hair back and tied it tight around the boy shoulder, to stop the poison. " Give me some wrappings!" She gripped her dagger once more as she positioned it above the skin. " God help me!" She muttered as she cut into the skin deep enough to let the blood flow. All watched as first red appeared but then turn to a purple color. She released a breath in relief as she wiped his shoulder with the gauze.

" Wipe the poison away continually, keep doing this until it returns to red. Alert me if anything else happens." She handed the gauze to Ryne and walked away outside. Maria leaned against the wall next to the entrance and slid down to the floor. She rested her head against her knees as she heard footsteps approach.

" You brought that boy back from death. How?" Theoden asked.

" It's something called CPR which is a word you possibly won't understand and too hard to pronounce. All you need to know is that I helped start his heart again and not by magical means. That's all." She replied, not bothering to look up.

" I will tell the boy parents that he is well." Theoden wanted to ask more questions but left, allowing her to rest. Legolas and Aragorn said nothing, just sat down next to her. They sat in silence for many minutes. Aragorn opened his mouth to suggest they move elsewhere when Ryne's voice cracked through the air.

" MARIA!" Her head whipped up so fast that she gave herself a slight case of whiplash. Rubbing her neck, she scrambled to her feet and ran back into the chaos. She brushed past Theoden and the parents, who were ready to see their boy. She entered upon the sight to see Ryne still wiping up the blood like she instructed. Maria saw that his eyes were grateful when she came back. " He stopped breathing." He informed her. She kneeled down beside the unconscious boy and checked his pulse. Maria could feel beats against her two fingers though they were starting to become faint. She tilted his head back once more, pinched his nose and blew air into his mouth.

She gave two breaths then looked for a rise and fall of the boys' chest. Nothing. She didn't notice that the parents clutched onto each other, watching and hoping that she could perform another miracle for their son. The mother gave a short cry as Maria began to 'beat' on her sons' chest when she lost his pulse. The room was deathly quiet, the only sounds coming from Maria as she counted. Minutes began to past by and soon she slowed down the compressions. Briefly glancing up, she saw the trepidation in their eyes. " What are you doing?" The mother shrieked as Maria stopped the compressions completely.

" I'm sorry." Her eyes widened in surprise when her head whipped to the side. Slowly Maria cupped her stinging cheek. The mother gripped her own wrist as she started to blubber. She threw herself upon her sons' still body and gave out guttural scream. Her husband moved towards his wife to comfort her, his own face coated with tears. Maria blinked back her own tears as she heard the mantra of "no's" coming from the mother. She dragged herself back onto her feet as Legolas and Aragorn approached her. Legolas moved to envelope her with a hug when she rose up her hands. She stared at the discolored blood that tainted them. " I have to…go wash them." Not waiting for a response, she ran out of the room.

Maria was on her knees, vomiting on the ground in a corner by the wall. After emptying her stomach contents, she just dry heaved. She rested her sore body against the wall, wiping her mouth with the sleeve of her tunic. Her body was cold and tired. Her fingers throbbed, she had them set earlier with a healer and she agitated them when she did the compressions. It was a bit difficult to breathe and sit with her bruised ribs. And on top of it all, her cheek was now tender from the slap she received. She cradled her head in her hands as she cried. Maria had no idea how much more she could take.

She was surrounded by death. Her whole self was being consumed by it. She was so tired and needed sleep. She didn't know how long she sat there. The sound of footsteps took her out of her depressing thoughts. She looked up and saw Eowyn. " You need a bath." Was all she said. Maria gave a dry chuckle. With the help of Eowyn, she rose to her feet. As they walked Maria saw that burials had begun. Her eyes watered as she saw how many there were. She released the hold Eowyn had on her and walked towards the buried. She stopped before she entered the proclaimed burial ground. She opened her mouth and started to croak out words.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me...
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

Her throat was choked with tears but continued singing. Notes cracking and off-key but she just couldn't care. Those around her stopped and listened.

T'was Grace that taught...
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear...
the hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares...
we have already come.
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far...
and Grace will lead us home

The Lord has promised good to me...
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be...
as long as life endures.

The last rays of the sun highlighted her dirty face as she willed her eyes to stay open. The fatigue was really starting to hit her. Haldir watched Maria with Eowyn, only a few steps away from her.

When we've been here ten thousand years...
bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise...
then when we've first begun

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me...
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

Maria barely felt the hand that touched her shoulder. She turned her head to look at Haldir. The glow usually present in her eyes was faded. Sorrow and Pain replaced any feeling in her. She looked passed his shoulder to see Legolas running towards them, he stopped a foot away from her. He looked at her, inspected; examined her with concerned eyes before taking her into his arms. Her eyes fluttered shut as she breathed in that scent that was unmistakably his. She dug her fingers into his shoulders as she sobbed for all those lost. He merely held her, combing her matted hair with his fingers.

Legolas had carried Maria back to their room where, with the help of Eowyn, she was bathed and put into a new pair of fresh clothes. Legolas kissed her before he left to join with Theoden, Aragorn, Gimli and Gandalf in a meeting. He wished to remain with her and told her but due to obligations he had to go. She simply told him he had to go and so he did. Eowyn finished tucking the blankets around her and moved to leave when Maria called out to her.

" Do you require something?" Eowyn asked.

" Can you…"

" Yes?" She prompted when Maria didn't finish her sentence.

" Can you stay here while I sleep?"

"…"

" I'm afraid I'll have nightmares and I want someone to wake me up if that happens…will you stay? Please." Eowyn's eyes softened at the childish request, she nodded. " Thank you." Her answer seemed to comfort Maria as she laid her head against the pillows and fell into sleep.

Maria had expected haunted images of those she saw die on the field but in a way what she was seeing was a nightmare. She sat down and let her toes bury beneath the sand. She gave a bitter smile at the sight before her. In front of her stood her mother, father and herself from 6 years ago, all three of them wet and full of sand. She gave a short chuckle as she watched her father try to figure out how to time the camera then rush over and have the picture taken. Her eyes were focused mainly on her parents that she didn't see someone approach her.

" If you reopen old wounds then you will never allow them to heal properly." Maria slowly turned around to find Lady Galadriel.

" I want it to heal as a scar so I can never forget." She replied.

" Scars are often jagged and full of unwanted memories."

" But they also teach us to be aware of our past mistakes." Galadriel gave her a small smile. Maria looked back at her parents to only find them gone. " What are you doing here?"

"You were seeking my presence Maria, I should be asking that question to you." Maria gave a short bitter laugh.

" Aren't you all seeing? All knowing? Don't you already know what I'm going to ask you?"

" If I was Maria, don't you think that I would've prevented this war? Save all the innocent lives?" The scene changed around them to show the Rohans burying their dead. Maria swallowed down the bile that was threatening to come up.

" I'm sorry." She sat down, her body shaking lightly as tears started to stream down her face once more.

" Do not apologize."

" I'm just so tired of it, ya know?" Her hands gripped her hair. Galadriel said nothing and just waited for her patiently. The environment changed around them once more. The image was replaced with the gardens of Rivendell. Maria paced a little bit before speaking. " I never really wanted to come back." She walked to the pond full of water lilies. " I didn't want to face all the fighting, killing again. I didn't want to be brave anymore! I don't know how Aragorn and Legolas and Gimli can do it!" She cried. " And Frodo! He has to deal with it all! I wanted to leave it all alone and never face it again! Leave everyone behind, even Legolas!" She looked at Galadriel for an answer. " Does that make me bad?"

"…"

Galadriel kneeled down in front of her, taking her hands into her own. " Wanting to be selfish does not make you bad. You have seen what no being should ever see, their own death. You understood the consequences of continuing this quest and you were given an opportunity to leave but you didn't. As I have told you, I didn't want you to fight for a cause that you didn't fully understand nor face the challenges that would ultimately lead you to death. You, Maria, should have in fact been selfish from the beginning. You had an obvious easy path laid before you but you chose the difficult path that would make you grow to who you are today."

"…"

"Maria?"

" And what kind of person am I?"

" You are a brave young woman with a loving heart and with that, you were lead back here."

" I just told you that I didn't want to come back." She tried to pull her hands back but that proved to be fruitless.

" You tried to find a way back Maria, I know this. You were willing to overcome your 'selfish needs' and come back to face the pain. To make sure Merry and Pippin were safe and to rejoin with Legolas. Is this not true?" Galadriel looked down at Maria's hands, coated with blisters and calluses.

"…"

" Is it true?"

"Yes." Galadriel smiled at her. " I still don't want to fight. I-I can't handle it anymore."

" That is understandable. I do not think your path lies with the remaining fellowship anymore. I believe you stayed this long because you care about your friends but their path differs from yours. I believe you have another friend in need that will take you away from here." She placed a water lily in Maria's hands.

" Thank you."

Her eyes slowly opened to find her room almost covered in complete darkness. She looked to her right to see Legolas reading from a book with two lit candles providing light. " Legolas," He put his book down on the table and smiled at her. He moved from the chair he was sitting in and took a seat beside her on the bed.

" You're awake, how do you feel?"

She gave a small sleepy sigh. " A bit better. How long have I been asleep?"

" A good part of the day." She gave a small nod and quickly looked around the room.

" Eowyn?"

" With Theoden and the others."

" Have I missed much?"

" A bit but you'll know after you rest. Are you hungry?" She shook her head. She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch as he stoked her face. She thought back unto her dream. She opened her eyes and looked at him.

" What is it?" He asked.

" I have something important to tell you."

To be continued…..

Authors Note: I absolutely hated the way I wrote the chapter before which is why I revised the ending. I was in the middle of writing the next chapter but I kept looking back and I was like: grrrrrrrrrr! So I fixed it. Now I'm much happier! I hope you guys like it too! Actually this story is nearing its end, just a couple more chapters!