How goes it, people? I would've started this a loooong time ago, but for accuracy's sake, I wanted to watch the movie again, and doggone it, my DVD player wouldn't play it. Fixed that problem quick, though, so here's the first chapter. Be ye warned: for this whole parody, every romantic moment will be ground into dust for the sake of humor. And, as I say in all of my stories, no character is safe. YES, THERE ARE SPOILERS, SO I'D THINK TWICE IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IY MOVIE 2.

I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters.

Boomerang Tag

On the night of the new moon, Inuyasha, Kagome, Shippo and Myoga are staying in a small hut, waiting for sunrise. While Kagome, Shippo, and Myoga are pretty bored, Inuyasha has found something to bide his time. He looked in Kagome's hand mirror and flipped his black hair over his shoulder. Apparently, the result he got wasn't good enough, because he heatedly swore and snapped the mirror shut. "This isn't working!" he exclaimed, "I can hardly see in here! There must be a little more light outside…"

Shippo quickly denied that request. "Number one, no there isn't, it's a new moon. And number two, you can't leave here yet! If you do, Naraku will know you lose your powers on the night of the new moon!"

"Ditto," Myoga said with boredom.

Kagome used this opportunity to take her leave. "I'm going," she told the rest of the group. As she was about to walk out of the door, Inuyasha called her. "Kagome," he said. She turned to look at him.

"Remember what I told you," Inuyasha said, "CYA."

"CYA," she repeated, and left the hut. After she left, Inuyasha looked back into the mirror and tried flipping his hair again. "Dammit!"

"Um, what are you doing?" Shippo ventured to ask.

Inuyasha snapped the mirror shut and glared at the little fox. "I'm trying to perfect my hair flip, duh! Kagome says if she flips her hair perfectly, then she has full power over any man! I want full power over any man!" Just to prove he was serious, he tried the hair flip one more time. It looked more like a hair flop.

"Oh-kay…" Shippo said slowly and looked the other way.

"Ditto," Myoga said with boredom before falling into a crack in the floor.

Outside of the hut, Kagome stopped by a pond to stretch, since it was so cramped in that hut. She looked at her surroundings: dead trees, water, more dead trees. "It's quiet," she remarked to herself. A fish then popped out of the water and screamed, "Can I turn the volume up for ya!"

Meanwhile, in the forest, Naraku was running as fast as he could, which was pretty fast since he was wearing the baboon pelt. Hiraikotsu was gaining on him, so he jumped to avoid it. The boomerang sliced through a few trees before returning to Sango's hand. "I'm not liking this game of Boomerang Tag," he remarked.

Kirara sailed over Naraku to cut him off. Upon landing, Sango hopped off, holding Hiraikotsu over her head. "Oh, please," she replied, "You beat my whole village in Spider Tag. I'm just returning the favor!" She swung Hiraikotsu; Naraku jumped onto the end and spring-boarded away. "Screw you and your twisted game!" he yelled over his shoulder while heading out of the forest. Sango took pursuit once again on Kirara. "Miroku! You're in!"

Miroku, who'd been waiting at the edge of the forest, pulled on his hand's prayer beads. "Awesome, I love Boomerang Tag!" Naraku saw the monk and stopped in his tracks, but it was too late. "Wind Tunnel!" The baboon pelt was being dragged by the black hole, but within, Naraku was replaced by the Saimyosho. Miroku angrily closed up his Wind Tunnel before they reached him. "Hey! Who said they could play?" Naraku's pelt flew in his face, and when Miroku moved it, Naraku hoisted him up by his neck. "Who said you could play?" he asked accusingly.

"D-didn't you know?" Miroku choked out, "Boomerang Tag is short for Boomerang-slash-Black-Hole Tag." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, a Sacred Arrow amputated the arm choking Miroku.

"You mean, Boomerang-slash-Black-Hole-slash-Bow-and-Arrow Tag!" Kagome said proudly.

Naraku glared daggers at the archer. "Wench! That was my pimpin' arm!" Another arrow went through his stomach. "Was that your pimpin' abdomen?" she asked him. Dust clouds surrounded him, though his voice could still be heard: "Grr…know what? TO HELL WITH THIS!" Naraku promptly exploded.

"Uh-oh!" Kagome cried as she was hit with the impact. Luckily, Shippo was behind her and transformed into a balloon to catch her. "What happened, Kagome! I thought Inuyasha told you to CYA!" Shippo was screaming.

"I tried, Shippo, I really tried!" she replied, close to hysterics.

"Whoa!" Miroku yelled as the impact hit him as well. Kirara caught him, and together they turned to face the new form their opponent took. It was a nasty brown spider with huge fangs and blood red eyes. "No matter what game I play," Naraku growled, "I'm only good at one: Spider Tag!"

"If he thinks this game is over, he is sadly mistaken," Sango said, scowling. Kirara flew over to Kagome and Shippo, who were gaping at the huge spider.

"Kagome! Did you tag him?" Sango asked.

"Yeah!" Kagome answered.

"What about Inuyasha?" Kagome shook her head

"Oh well," Miroku said, "He's missing out on a fun game!"

"Round 2, Kirara!" She roared in response and charged towards the spider.

Kagome loaded another arrow. "Let's go, Shippo," she said.

"All right…" he said, but didn't move. Soon, he broke into a huge sweat. "Arachnophobia…kicking in…"

Sango threw Hiraikotsu first. The boomerang would have made a direct hit if there was no barrier. "Ha! Tag that!" Spider Naraku taunted.

Meanwhile, Shippo finally gained his nerve. "Me too!" he said while transforming into a seagull. Kagome observed this and said, "Hey Shippo! You turned into a pterodactyl!" Shippo looked at her and said, "You can't tell me they don't have medicine for astigmatism in your time." Kagome aimed at the spider, but Shippo backed out when it began walking towards them. "Aaaah! Squish it!" he squealed. "No Shippo! We can't run away!" Kagome said. The spider began to emit a fog-like substance from its mouth. "Can we run now?" Shippo said sarcastically, and turned tail.

Going back to Miroku and Sango, Miroku suggested that they destroy the spider's legs. "Good idea," Sango agreed, "Under his belly, Kir-" she stopped mid-sentence due to the event of being groped.

"Three seconds," Sango said, deathly calm.

"Possessed ha-, wait, I already used that one. I couldn't help mys-" Sango slapped any other words away. "What do you mean, 'I couldn't help myself?'"

Inuyasha looked at the scene through a crack in the hut. "What? They're playing Boomerang Tag without me? Those ingrates!" He grabbed Tetsusaiga and headed for the exit. Myoga watched him and attempted to stop him. "Ditto!" he yelled. "Shut up!" Inuyasha said while stepping on him. Before he left, Inuyasha heard Kagome's scream. This brought him to look once again through the crack in the wall. He saw Rabid Spider Naraku chasing Seagull Shippo and (insert adjective here) Kagome this way. Shippo flew up to avoid Naraku, but the spider was still barreling towards the hut. Inuyasha recoiled and tried to back off, but it was too late. The spider's leg leveled the hut.

At the same time, beams of light were racing across the land. Before the dust cleared around Inuyasha, the light came to him. Now, restored as a hanyou, Inuyasha pointed Tetsusaiga forward. "Count me in, guys," he said, "What's Boomerang-slash-Black-Hole-slash-Bow-and-Arrow-slash-Demon-Fang Tag without me?"

I think I'll stop right there. The way I made the characters OOC bothered me a little but eh, who cares? I don't know how long this story is going to be, but I'll just write in increments until I reach the end of the movie. I plan on stopping next chapter where Miroku loses his Wind Tunnel. We'll see what happens. So was it funny enough? Review please!