"Cloud are ya alright?" Barret yelled down to me. "Yeah I 'm okay," I yelled up them. "We're coming down," Tifa said. I got up, brushed the dirt of me, and saw a spectacular sight. Everybody jumped down the hole and all ended up in the same trance as I at the same sight.
"Wow!" everybody said at the same time. There was a huge cave that was at least a mile wide and several hundred feet deep. "I know this place. But I don't know where?" Red said. I decided to walk around to see if there was anybody around. I saw a small red button that said, "Push Me".
"Hey guys check this out," I said. "What is it Cloud?" Cid asked. "It's a small red button that says push me," I replied. "Well when a button like that says push me there's only one thing to do," Barret said. "No! Don't!" yelled Red. "It's a (Barret presses the button)… trap," Red said as the ground started to shake.
A metal part of the floor opened and out popped two robo guards. "Halt felons! You cannot get away from us!" one of the robo guards said in a drill sergeant voice. "And I thought this wasn't going to be fun," Cid said. I pulled out my Ultima Weapon ready to strike, Tifa got her Premium Heart ready, Barett held up his Missing Score, Red had his Limited Moon ready, Yuffie pulled out her Conformer, Cid took out his Venus Gospel, and Cait Sith 2 took out his HP Shout.
"If you choose to fight prepare to face the consequences you puny flesh covered weaklings!" said the robo guard. "He did not just call me puny!" Barret said as his face turned bright red. "Yeah! He also said your mom's a slut," Red said. "You stupid son of a bitch! I going to rip your ass apart into equal sheets of tin foil!" Barret yelled. Barret held up his Missing Score and fired at the robot.
"Barret, you are always so arrogant," Tifa said. "Commander Sephiroth they are resisting our orders," the robo guard said into its wrist. "Commander Sephiroth?" we all said bewildered. "Well destroy them then you idiots!" the voice said from the arm of the robo guard. "Prepare to die fleshies!" the robo guard said in a voice with no fear.
The robo guard held up its arm and a blast of fire came flying out of a little cannon on the arm of the robo guard. "Ahhh!" Tifa yelled as the flames singed her skin badly. Just then, I felt a bit of electricity flow through my veins. All of a sudden, I yelled out "Bolt 4!" and huge bolt of lightning came down through the ceiling (floor) and exploded the one-robo guard. Everyone's mouth fell to the floor.
"How the hell did you do that Cloud?" Cait Sith 2 asked. "I don't know? I just felt it in my body when the flames hit Tifa. Speaking of which. Tifa are you okay?" I asked. "Just a couple of minor burns but I will be alright," she said. By the time we turned around the other robo guard was gone. "Good riddens to bad rubbish," Barret said.
"We have to find out why the person the robo guard was talking to was Sephiroth," I said. "Self-destruct mode has been activated," said a voice out of nowhere. "All people/peoples have 5 minutes to evacuate. Have a nice day," the voice said. "Have a nice day my fucking ass!" Cid said. "We got to get the hell out of here and quick!" Barret said. "There's no way out!" Yuffie said.
"Then how did the robo guard escape?" I said. "Son of a bitch!" Barret yelled as he hit a side of a wall. Clang! "Hey! There's a door here," Red said. "One minute till detonation," the voice said. We quickly ran behind the door and slammed it shut.
A minute later the whole place blew up and a big boom hit the huge steel plated door. "That was almost too close," Tifa said. We opened the door, the ceiling was gone, and sunshine entered. There was a small piece of Materia on the ground. There was note that said, "Sephiroth". I put it in my back pocket.
"Hey! There is a tunnel! That is probably where the robo guard escaped into," Tifa said. We entered the tunnel and it was pitch black. "How the hell are we going to see?" Cid said. Just then, a light lit up the tunnel. I looked over and Barret had a light implanted onto his arm.
"After we beat Sephiroth I had my arm upgraded," Barret said explaining. We walked, we walked, and we walked. When we reached the end, there was an underground city. "Well I'll be a black man in a white neighborhood," Barret said. The city was nothing I had ever seen before.
We walked in a little further and saw the whole city. I kept walking and did not see the cliff a head of me and I started to fall. "Help me!" I screamed holding on for dear life. However, they were all staring at the city. I managed to get a foothold and pulled myself up. "Thanks for your help guys!" I said.
"No problem Cloud," Barret said staring at the city. I dusted myself off and said, "Hey guys I think we should look for the robot that got away." "We should split up to cover more ground," Red said. So we set up our groups, Group 1 was Tifa and I, Group 2 was Barret and Red, and Group 3 was Cid, Yuffie, and Cait Sith 2. Tifa and I set north, Barret and Red went east, and Cid, Yuffie, and Cait Sith 2 went west.
We walked into the main entrance of the city. We passed a sign that said, "Welcome to Sephirothville". "Sephirothville? That's the stupidest name for a city I've ever heard," I said. Just then a robo guard came out of nowhere and said, "I would like to see your Citizen Cards please." "What's a Citizen Card?" Tifa said into my ear. "I don't know, I'll ask," I said to her.
"What's a Citizen Card?" I asked the robo guard. "A Citizen Card is the card that says you're a registered citizen of Sephirothville," the robo guard said. "Well, we don't have any," I said politely. "Well then we have a problem," the robo guard said back to me. "Please follow me to Sephirothville County Court," the bot said. "Cloud I don't want to go to jail," Tifa whispered to me in my ear.
"Oh, you're not going to jail," the robo guard said. "Oh what a relief," Tifa said. "Yup, you all are going to prison," the guard bot said. Then Tifa started to cry. In addition, of course that enraged me. When I said we refused to go to prison because we did not have some stupid ass card, the robo guard got very angry. "If you do not follow me to sort this out with the Mayor in County Court, you will automatically face the death penalty," the robo guard said to us. Just as it said, that Tifa smacked it right across its metallic face. "That wasn't very nice!" Tifa said.
The robo guard turned around and its face started to turn red. "Death penalty activate!" the robo guard said. Just then, the robo guard's arms turned into unimaginable weapons. It started to come towards us. Out of nowhere, a Conformer sliced off the robo guard's head. We turned and everybody was standing there in disappointment. "Cloud, how many times have I told you to play nice with the other robots?" Barret said in a motherly voice.
"For a second I thought we were mince meat," I said. I looked over and Tifa is on the floor breathing hard. "Tifa? Are you okay?" I asked her. "Yeah. I'll be okay once my heart starts beating again," she said. "What was that all about?" Red asked. "I don't know. Something about a stupid ass card," I said. "Do you mean a Citizen Card?" Barret asked me. "Yeah. Why?" I asked.
"That's the same bullshit we had trouble with, but we kicked some ass," Barret said. "Does anybody know what time of day it is?" Yuffie asked. "Evening," Cid replied. "How the hell do you know that?" I asked. "Well… I got these new kick ass shades that can see through anything," Cid replied again. "Well we should get some sleep now till mourning," I suggested.
So we crept in through the gate and went to find a hotel. Not far into the city, we saw a sign for the Sephiroth Inn. We went in and asked, "How much for one night for seven people?" "1400 gil Mac," the clerk replied. "1400 gil! Did you just say 1400 gil!" I screamed at the clerk. "Let me check, (short pause) …Yes I did," the clerk said.
"Cloud! Just pay the man," Tifa yelled at me. "Take it you ungrateful bastard," I said to myself under my breathe. We went up to our rooms, girls in one and guys in the other, and got ready for bed. In our room I got the bed, Cid got couch, Cait Sith 2 trained himself to sleep standing up, and Red and Barret got the floor. I swear if Barret were covered with fur, you would swear he were a dog.
As I was going to bed I grabbed the glass of water off the night table and took a great big gulp. After I put the glass down, I felt a little woozy. The next thing I know, I wake up to see the sun shining in through the window. The cave has a big sky light on it. I decided not to question it. I got up, took a big stretch and a big yawn and said to myself, "Damn did I sleep good last night."
I look over and I see an extra pillow. "I didn't have a second pillow there last night," I said to myself. Just then, I heard a knock at the door and all the guys came in through the door. "It's about time," Barret said. "Where were you?" I asked. "Bathroom," Cid said. "Dudes we have our own," I said. "Yeah but our bathroom is locked.
I went to take a leak this mourning, but the door was locked. I heard the shower going so I left," Barret said. I got out of bed and went over to see who was in the bathroom. Just as I had my hand on the knob Yuffie came in screaming. "Cloud, Cloud! Tifa's gone!" she yelled. "Yuffie! You scared the fucking shit out of us!" Cid yelled. "Sorry," Yuffie said apologizing. "I think we are going to figure out this mystery," I said.