He walked slowly across the deck enjoying the breeze. He took a deep breath and felt the cool air fill his lungs and slow his rapidly beating heart. He sighed heavily and looked over the railing into the water lapping softly at the side of the ship.
Water… water… someone was pouring cool water into his mouth and a gentle hand was mopping his forehead with a damp cloth. He blinked slowly and let his vision come back into focus. He was astonished to see the face of a woman bent over him with concern in her large eyes. "You were wounded. We didn't think anyone was alive after that massacre! Some of the other healers and I were helping to gather the bodies of the fallen and we found you lying there. At first I thought you were… well… but then I saw your chest rise and fall. I've never been so grateful in all my life!" she said and a huge grin spread across her freckled face. "I'm Leela. What's your name, soldier?"
He smiled weakly. He was surprised to see anyone so happy to find a soldier alive. After six hundred days, people of all nations had come to hate the soldiers! They just wanted them gone! "I'm General Iroh," he said, his voice slightly hoarse as he grimaced and clutched his side.
"Oh be careful! That wound is deep," she said softly as she gently moved his hand away from his bandaged side. "You're lucky to be alive," she added softly. Suddenly it hit him! The battle… had they won the battle? Was the city finally under Fire Nation control?
"The battle… did we conquer the city?" he asked urgently. The young woman's eyes darkened and she looked toward the ground.
"I'm sorry," she said. "It was a massacre. The Earth Nation troops were just too strong and they had the advantage of knowing the city. It was a disaster," she said sadly.
"Oh," was all he could manage to say. This was a crushing blow! This was to be the battle to end all battles! This was the victory that he needed to make his name famous throughout the Fire Nation! This battle would have restored his glory and earned him the respect of his nation. How could he lose? First he lost his throne. Then he lost his love and now this! Would things never go right for him? He lay his head back against the pillow and closed his eyes to keep the tears of frustration from showing.
"Rest now," she said softly and gently patted his shoulder. "We'll talk more tomorrow, when you're stronger. Don't worry, soldier," she said and gave his arm a little squeeze. That was the last thing he remembered before he fell asleep. His dreams however afforded him no rest!
His nightmares were terrible! In his dreams he saw the faces of the ranks of men his errors in judgment had sent to their deaths! Their ghastly visages chased him about shouting curses and words of hatred at him!
He shot up in bed sweating and panting heavily! She was there in an instant, sitting on the foot of his bed with her arms around his shoulders. "It's alright. I'm here now. Don't be frightened! It was just a dream. It's over now," she whispered as she rocked back and forth with him in her arms as the tears streamed down his cheeks and he told her about the nightmare! "I know it was awful but it's over now, soldier."
"No! It'll never be over! That's just it! I'll always carry the memory of my failure with me! Every night I'll be haunted by the faces of those boys and every morning I'll have to wake up hating myself!"
Her hazel eyes burned into his as her lips tightened. She said nothing for a few moments then she took his face in her hands. "Now you listen to me," she said, her voice quiet but firm. "You did not fail! You did NOTHING wrong! You did the best you could, all of you boys did! You fought your hardest but the Earth Nation had the advantage. You can't hold it against yourself! Tell me what could you have done different if you had the chance to do it again?" Her eyes were intense and serious as she waited for him to answer.
"I… I could have… well," he stammered trying to think of something! "N… nothing I guess," he said after several moments. "I did all that I could," he said with a heavy sigh.
"There. You see? You did your best. That's all anyone can ever ask of you! Besides life is too short to spend it moping about something that you can't change," she said, her face softening. "All you can do now is put it behind you and move on with your life. Yes, it will take time and a great amount of effort, but you can get through it!" Her eyes were suddenly warm and kind again, all the intense feeling gone. "I'll help you," she said softly, stroking the side of his face gently, "I promise."
They were married shortly afterward. She was the gem of his life, his pride and joy! Those had been the happiest days of his life!