chp 12

Kikyo walked down the familiar path, to the cave that held Onigumo. He had been there for about 2 months now, never able to move, and never would be able. She gave him great pitty, and nursed him back to health best she could. But he still would never move from that spot.

She brought a container of hot thick soup for him, and more dressings for his wounds. She saw Kaede trailing behind her, kicking at the dirt,"Kaede what's wrong?"

"I don't like that man, sister. He's tainted with evil, and the things he says about you are...not right..."

"What did Onigumo say?"

"That he wants you for himself, and that he'd like to fuck you."

Kikyo's face because hard,"Kaede! You do not use such language!"

"What did I say?"

She looked at her innocent sister, and shook her head,"The F-word, don't ever use it. It is a horrible word to use."

"Ok, I won't use it."

She smiled, and Kikyo felt her stomach flip. Onigumo should not be teaching a child Kaede's age language like that. She worried that it might not be ethical to bring Kaede with her, yet she knew this was very good training for Kaede. Learning to heal wounds as bad as these would be good for her, but is it worth the price of her innocence?

She took Kaede's hand, and walked to the cave on the edge of the pathway. They entered, the air damp and musty. Kaede looked at the lump at the end of the cave, still black from his wounds. She inched towards there, Kikyo urging her on to go closer. She reached out, and knelt on the ground beside the lump of charred flesh

"Kikyo, what do I do?"

"Unwrap his left arm, and rewrap it with the dressings I've brought."

Kaede did as she was told, her face twisting into a squirm of apalledness from the wounds. The black charred flesh was surrounded by fresh pink flesh growing underneath. Her eyes rolled back in her head as she suck her tongue out. EW!

"Kaede are you all right?"

She looked at her sister, her face monotoned, not even noticing the smell or the nastiness,"I'm fine, its just a little overwhelming."

Kikyo looked down at Onigumo's bloodshot eyes. The man was unusually silent today, usually he was jittered with enthusiam to see her. But today he was silent, staring at Kikyo with hungry, wanting eyes. But Kikyo kept a straight face, not daring to look him in the eyes. Her mind was still foggy, still unsure of herself. She kept remembering Inuyasha, and her heart ached to no end...

"Kikyo, the dressings are done!"

She looked up, and Kaede has rebandaged the entire arm already,"Thats good Kaede, now why don't you feed him the soup."

"I'm not hungry,"The burnt man said gruffly.

But Kikyo just shook her head,"You need to regain your strength."

"I need it not.."

His gruff harsh voice cut through her, like he never wanted to get better. She put the soup back in the container, and told Kaede to come with her,"We're leaving..."

"Good bye, Lady Kikyo.."

She glanced back, feeling a twinge of hatred in his voice. He was so full of malice and evil, it made her stomach quesy to be around him. But she felt grave pitty for him, and tried to be her kindest towards him. Kaede glanced back, feeling the evil radiating off him,"Kikyo, I don't think that man deserves your kindness."

"Give him pitty, if anything. You needn't be kind, just pittiful to him."

"He's a bad man."

Kikyo shook her head,"What harm could he possibly do?"

Kaede looked at her, her eyes full of that childhood inner knowledge. Kikyo just dismissed it, knowing full well there was no way that Onigumo could ever harm her...

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Inuyasha watched Kikyo form a near by tree. Her sister followed behind her... no this was a horrible time to talk to her. He bit his lip, and jumped away. He glided from limb to limb gliding through the forest, and trailed them until Kaede was left in the hands of Master Hakuri. He watched the old man take the girl inside the little hut, and immediately went to begin her lessons for the day. Kikyo stayed for a moment, but left sooner than he expected. She exited the hut, and looked around for anybody.

"I know you've been following us. Who's there."

Inuyasha jumped down in front of her, and she didn't even flinch. She looked at him,"Where were you?"

"Thats not your concern."

"Fine..."

She looked at him, her cold eyes boring into him. She pressed her lips into a thin line, and started walking towards him,"You were doing something, weren't you."

"Its not you concern..."

"Maybe not, but I think I have a right to know..."

"You don't have any rights over me, at all. I am free to do as I wish, I am not owned by you. I'm not an object for your enjoyment!"

She glared at him, her once warm eyes now cold and hateful,"I may not own you, but we are tied together in a way no one can sever. I know you feel it, otherwise you wouldn't be so open with me. Can you not see that I care about you! I just want whats best for you!"

"You are not my mother, or my guardian. Let me make desisions for myself."

She turned away, not letting the sting of his words hurt her,"Fine, be a man and lets get over this repulsive argument."

"Fine," He spat it out at her. She turned, her eyes brimming with tears. She opened her mouth to say something, but a shot of light came at them. Inuyasha grabbed her, getting away from the destructive beams. He looked up, seeing a man in a baboon skin. He glared, who was this fool?

"Hmoh, your nose is sharo, isn't it?"

"Who the hell are you?"

"Patience, Inuyasha. Patience..."

He pushed his arm out, and a dozen inscect demons came after them. Kikyo fired an arrow towards the baboon man, but he dodged it, and threw a tentacle towards her. But Inuyasha caught it just in time, and slashed it to pieces. He growled, and ran after the baboon man. But by the time he jumped up, his scent wasn't there. The demon inscects flew away, and Kikyo shot one last arrow, in an attempt to destroy them.

"What was that,"She stated.

He looked at her, thinking maybe it would be a good idea to stick around for a few days. He was sure that wasn't the last they would see of that demon. Reluctantly he followed Kikyo to her hut, sitting down on the bench near the window. He waited while Kikyo went into her room. He thought about Kagome, hoping she was ok...

He heard someone walking towards him, it was Kikyo. She had on a simple short kimono. Too short for his liking, but he could tell she wasn't trying to woo him...

Or at least he hoped she wasn't. She was above that, she used her mind to get what she wanted, not her body,"Kikyo, what are you wearing?"

"Inuyasha, its nearly nightfall. Why are you still here?"

"I cam to protect you, in case that demon came back."

She tilted her head slightly as she looked up, and smiled,"Thank you..."

"Yea well, I don't want anything to happen to you."

He looked at her, seeing the look in her glazed eyes. Oh no...

"You want to protect me,"She walked over to him, her eyes shining(there ya go mack) with something he didn't want to see in them. She walked up to him, making him back up against a wall,she said in a needy tone,"Why?"

"Because...you're my friend, my best friend..." He tried to chose his words carefully, trying not ot lead her on. Unfortunately it didn't work.

"I thought we were more than friends.."

She leaned in, and captured his lips. He froze, not making a single movement. She didn't seem to notice, and climbed on the bench he was on, sitting in his lap. She wrapped her arms around him, trying to coax him out of his frozen state. She licked his lips, her warm tongue feeling so good against his dry lips.

He tried to push her off, he knew this was wrong. But even after he struggled to get her off, she wouldn't budge. He twisted and turned away from her, but she seized his chin, looking him dead in the eyes,"You didn't struggle before, why now?"

"Because, I..." But she forced her lips on his open mouth. Even he couldn't resist her, and he felt himself begin to kiss back. No! What about Kagome, what about her! She's waiting for you to come back to her, not let Kikyo seduce you!

"Ki...Kik..yo"

She pulled her lips from his, and looked at him,"What?"

"This is wrong! This seems nothing like the Kikyo I know, whats wrong with you?"

She pressed her lips together, giving him a hardened stare,"I am not the Kikyo you knew before. I have been given a chance to be like a normal woman. I will not let the opportunity be seized from me by acting nobel and how everyone wants me to be! I want to be able to let my emotions control me, I don't want to push them back any more! I love you, can't you see that! I'm sick of hiding it from you, I'm sick of being something I'm not! Let me love you, if only for a moment..."

She gave him the sadest stare he had ever seen. He understood too, that was the worst part. He knew that she could never show her true colors, how had it was for her to be herself. But it wasn't right to Kagome, that he let her over take him. He had to be stronger than that, stronger than her emotions.

"Kikyo, I can't..."

"Why! Is it me, tell me if its me. I will do anything to win your heart, anything."

"You can't win it.."

"WHY?"

"BECAUSE ITS NOT A PRIZE TO BE WON!" He yelled it at her, shocking her,"I choose to whom I want to give my heart. Its not something that can be won. Its not like something you see in a store, that if you save up enough money you can buy. I don't love you..."

She looked like she was just stabbed through the heart. He looked at her,"Maybe in another lifetime, under different circumstances, I could fall in love with you. But not these..."

"You love Kagome don't you..." She said it with so much pain, that it even hurt him. The air in the room was cloudy with the pain that raidiated off her. She looked so utterly alone, sitting there...tears brimming in her eyes.

"I can't believe I didn't see it until now, how you acted around her. How you spied on her, and tried to hurt her so she would go away. How you scared her, and still protected her. How you so desperately wanted to find her when she went missing,"She looked at him,"You went looking for her again, didn't you..."

"Yes,"There was not point in lieing now...

"I knew it, long ago. When she first came here, I knew you would love her. It only worsened how I felt about you..."She looked at him, her eyes over flooding with tears. He wiped them away, and watched at she began to slip out of her position. She sat next to him on the bench, her arms wrapped around her knees,"So we'll never be together..."

"No, I'm sorry..."

She got off the bench, and walked away. She wrapped her arms around herself, letting the tears fall down her already tears stained cheeks,"I imagined how it would hurt, if I told you my feelings and you told me you loved her. But no matter how you prepare yourself, it hurts worse than any wound can sting. A broken heart is the worst pain, because it scars the soul,"She turned to look at him, trying to draw comfort from him.

"Kikyo, I'm sorry..." He was blubbering, but he hated to see her in so much pain. He reached out to her, and pulled her into his arms. He held her, as the priestess cried into his haiori. He stroked her hair lovingly, like a brother to a younger sister. He felt her body shudder from all her pain, and he held her tighter.

"Inuyasha..."

"Kikyo, please understand. I care for you, I really do. I'm not going to pretend that none of this ever happened, I still want to be apart of your life. I want to be your friend, but I don't know how to be..."

She never answered, her throat to raw to even try. The hardest pain, is when you've stored up hope for so long, only to find out that you never could have what you dreamed of. For Kikyo, she wanted the hanyou, Inuyasha. In her heart, she always knew she would never have him, not after Kagome arrived. For the longest time, she though she would hate Kagome. She thought that she would kill her, and torture her for the pain she brought. But as she spent time in the hanyou's arms, she knew that she never would. Kagome was her best friend, above all. Nothing could ever change that. Maybe in another life she could hate her, but not this one.

"Inuyasha, thank you..."

"I'm here for you, you know..."

"I know..."

She felt her shattered heart fall to an eternity of pain. She wanted to die, it hurt so bad. But for once, she let the pain flow away. She didn't act strong, she cried like a little girl. She nuzzled her face against his chest, letting her tears soak it. She wanted to love him, yet knowing the truth was like a weight was lifted off her. But it didn't heal the damage doen to her, and nothing ever would.

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Story still far from over, and I've introduced one of the last two characters (Onigumo and Naraku are the same person). Who can guess the final one? Anybody?

First person to answer correctly gets a cookie! yay for cookies!

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING! Omg, I got...14 reviews... thats unheard of for me, so as an extra special treat for making me SSSOOOO happy, I promise to write an epilogue!

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Hey If anyone is STILL READING please visit the following authors, they deserve great reviewers like you! Cagalli-Yula-Athha( She's a first time writer, and she deserves reviews!), Star Sapphirex (she's awesome, just all around awesome), and Sailor X (read her story Kagome and the Pirate Captain it was one of the stories that got me writing fanficiton, and it is ssoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good!)

Ok, Review! Toodles!