Disclaimer: All Suikoden elements belong to Konami.

Note: Grr! Fourth draft….I'm going to get it right this time, I swear!

Rebirth

Chapter 10: Exposure

by ArchFaith

Darkness, her eternal home. The deep expanse of empty space beneath her soul, the forever unfilled feelings inside her heart.

Memories seemed to swirl through her mind, one by one entering and exiting in the space of only a few seconds; the beautiful, green countryside in which her native village was located; the smiling, cheerful faces of her parents and siblings; afternoons spent in bliss on the flower-filled hillsides; Rean, the handsome young knight who had become her lover as well as her vampire child; the desolate, forsaken cabin which had later become their dwelling; the Blue Moon Village, her greatest masterpiece; the faces of all the lonely, pained souls to whom she had granted her gift…

The face of Nash Latkje, the Harmonian agent who had asked her to assist him on his mission to find a True Rune. And his eyes…the deep, brilliant spheres of azure, the only eyes that could ever keep her firmly anchored to this world.

And the child…the child…

With a small groan she forced her eyes open, blinking several times as the blurry, dim world shimmered around her, the warm desert breeze gently blowing in through the opened window as she brought her hands to her eyes, rubbing them as she rapidly sat up, ignoring the dull pain in her abdomen as she hurriedly looked around the darkened room. The moon had already risen high in the sky; it was past midnight, that much was certain, and the last she remembered the sun was still shining brightly through the curtained windows. The dim glow of the oil lantern was the only light present in the room, and with her temporarily weakened condition, did not do much to aid her sight.

"Nash?" she called out, with a hint of uncertainty present in her voice. Surely he had to be around; he would not have left her alone in the house, not if…she shook the thought out of her mind and called to him again. "Nash?"

A quick sensation suddenly took hold of her heart; her normally calm and measured breathing rapidly increased as through a metal clamp had taken hold of her chest. She looked around the room in vain with her still unfocused eyes, trying to catch any sign or hint as to what had occurred in the time she had been asleep. She was again clothed in the familiar white shirt Nash had given her to wear, and blankets were tucked tightly around her even though the night was sweet and warm. The instruments she had seen on the night table before—the bottles, the needles, the bandages—all gone now, and the entire room suddenly felt bare and unlived in.

A series of rapid notions galloped through her brain as she sat there, afraid to move lest the very thought she dreaded became real. The child…the last thing she remembered was the doctor's voice, saying…so then, it was a child, and not a demon or a mutant as she had imagined it to be. Ridiculous thoughts, she reflected…but if it was indeed an innocent baby…had it lived? Was it alright? If the child had died through any actions brought on by her own wishing, she was not sure she would ever be able to forgive herself…was it alive?

Was it alive?

Though it had only been a few seconds since she called out the swordsman's name, it could very well have been a hundred years before the door cracked open, and the boy's familiar outline appeared in the low light of the living room. "You're awake," he said simply, coming into the room and closing the door behind him.

Her heart beat rapidly as he crossed the room, his gestures neutral as he took up his familiar place next to her, sitting down in the old straw chair next to the bed. Straining to see his features with her blurred vision, she sat back in frustration, an anguished and suspenseful look spreading over her face as she propped herself up on two hands, trying her best to locate his azure eyes in the darkness.

She almost did not want to ask him; it was the only way possible to relieve her tremendous anxiety, true…but then what if the answer was negative? What if she…

"Nash…the child…" she whispered, her voice low as she gently placed her hands over his folded arms. Her voice faltered for a moment, but then grew more assertive as she squeezed his arms in unease. "The last thing I remember was the doctor telling you it was…dead…"

The horrible phrase echoed through her mind, and her heart beat ever faster as she endeavored to seek his features in the darkness. "Is it true, then?" she finally asked, her soul pleading for relief. "The child is dead?"

His expression was not visible to her; the room was too dark, and her vision was still regaining its sharp clarity as he looked to her, the lines of his face fuzzy as she awaited the answer to her query. "Sierra…" he began, with a tender tone in his voice. "Sierra, don't—"

"Then it is dead," she replied, interrupting his words as a dead weight seemed to settle in the pit of her stomach, replacing her beating heart with a dull, thudding pulse as she struggled to pull herself through the thick mists that had suddenly enveloped her soul. "It…the child is lost."

"Sierra!" the boy exclaimed, in a loud and impulsive tone. "I guess you can't see very well yet, huh?"

"What?" she questioned, raising her eyebrows at the highly inappropriate response. "What are you talking about? Are you not upset? What kind of time is this to be making jokes—"

"Hold on, old girl!" he answered, gently placing his hand over hers. "Look…focus your eyes," he instructed, observing the glazed, glassy expression she had on her face. "Your eyesight must have been weakened…just take a good look at me. Focus on me."

In a wild mix of fury and confusion she drove the blurry vision from her eyes in only a few seconds, her aggressive will driving her into rage as she finally turned to him, taking in the clear sight of his clothes and hair, his eyes, and his crossed arms.

"There! I can see perfectly clearly…now what the devil did you want me to—"

She gasped, her now raging heart coming to a resounding stop as her ruby irises wandered over his visage; the wavy blonde hair, the light desert clothes of brown and white, the small blanket he held wrapped in his arms…

His arms…

And suddenly a tremendous blow struck her insides, a powerful blast that made her heart suddenly begin to chime in a great wash of confused exultation, her brain still uncomprehending as she instinctively moved closer to him, gently placing her pale, quivering hands on the small parcel he held tightly in his arms.

On first glance, it had appeared to be a mere assemblage of some sort; a pile of rags, perhaps, or a fluffy blanket. But now, with her vampire vision fully restored to her, it was clear that the tiny bundle he held was indeed far more important than an insignificant piece of cloth…

A gentle smile materialized over the swordsman's face as she gingerly touched the soft bundle in his arms. "You always assume the worst, Sierra," he whispered, shifting closer to her. His eyes drifted up to meet her passionate, confused gaze. "You passed out right after Joker said the baby was dead…you don't remember anything, do you?"

The vampire's eyes turned once again to the small, soft bundle, which she could plainly see was slowly moving, rising and falling with an imperceptible rhythm. With a hesitant glance she gently withdrew her hands, letting them hover over the bundle as she looked up at him. "Not at all," she whispered simply, with a frown visible on her face. Was this…could it be…?

A warm smile was still upon his face as he focused his eyes downward, to the small bundle cuddled tight in his arms. "We…we all thought she was dead at first…her skin was pure white, and she wasn't moving at all when she came out. But…just when I thought we had lost her for good…she began to cry."

Sierra listened to the short story in a surreal daze, fragments of broken images and muffled noise passing through her mind as she gently placed her hands on his crossed arms. "So then…the child is alright?" she asked, her voice betraying the sheer volume of emotion that had suddenly gushed forth from her heart. "It…I mean, she…she is alright?"

His smile persisted as he looked up into her inquisitive eyes. "Why don't you take a look for yourself?"

Her eyes turned back to the small white bundle cradled in his arms. The last few hours had been harsh for her, and the anxiety was not about to disappear; her soul had taken much more in these last few weeks than it had ever borne before, and this new revelation, this new hope that had arisen in her soul—as welcome as it was, still it caused her hands to shake and tremble as she gently placed delicate fingers over the small hood formed by the blanket, lifting it up and tucking it to the side as she took her first look at the being she had brought into the world.

The child had been sleeping lightly, content to lie cradled in her father's now familiar arms during the few hours she had been alive; but now, with the hood of the blanket tucked away, a new light source—the flickering light of the oil lantern—came into play, and the baby slowly opened her eyes to peer up at the new face looking so keenly down upon her.

Azure. Pure, unadulterated spheres of deep azure.

The vampire felt a gasp rise out of her lips as she looked down at the little girl, the child whose life had developed so closely to hers over the last few months. Large, round eyes glanced questioningly up at her as the baby opened and closed her eyelashes, small wisps of light, platinum blonde hair covering her tiny head as she gently shifted in Nash's arms.

"Gods," the vampire murmured, raising her hand to the child's soft cheek, feeling the smooth, warm skin as she gently stroked the baby's face. "So this is the being I have delivered into this world…"

"Where you expecting anything less?" the blonde boy asked, his eyes still focused on the baby, whose eyes were languidly glancing at the both of them now. He gave a slight chuckle. "No demon or monster here, old girl."

"Indeed," the vampire answered, letting her hand drift down to her side once more. "I was wrong to presume such an invalid result..." A small smile formed on her face as the child's blinking azure eyes followed her stare. "I am sorry to say she has your eyes, Nash."

"I noticed that as soon as Joker placed her in my arms," he answered, giving the baby a small hug as the child again shifted in his embrace. "Would you rather she had yours?"

The vampire smiled absently, watching the child's sleepy azure eyes blink up at her. A great wave of relief seemed to rush through her soul as gently ran her fingers over the child's pink cheek. "She is beautiful, indeed," she whispered, the smile still upon her lips as the child extended a tiny hand to her.

For one instant—it could not have been more than a few seconds—it seemed as though a perfect peace had descended upon the small, hot room, upon the still-messy bed on which the two of them—the three of them—sat. As she gently grasped the child's tiny hand in her own, it seemed the entire world—for, to her the world consisted of this one small room—seemed perfect. The lovers…and the child. In all her restless days, when she thought a child would be a hindrance and nuisance to her, she had never thought she would feel quite so attached to this new little one as she did now.

But…still, there persisted a nagging thought. She tried to push it to the back of her mind as she gently touched the child's hand, but still the contemplation raged to the forefront of her emotions; and as much as she tried to stifle it, it formed an ugly tumor in her mind, growling and threatening with every effort to calm it down.

What am I doing…? Surely this is a dream…but no, it is real. What have I done? I have brought a child into this world…a child with no origin, no explanation for its existence! And then there is the fact of my decision…

"Do you want to hold her?" Nash's calm voice quickly drove the thoughts away. She delicately let go of the child's hand and looked up into the swordsman's eyes.

"No, of course not. I was never good at handling children."

"Suit yourself," he replied with a calm smile on his face, the tender expression rapidly driving tremors of guilt through her soul as she rolled over the idea of telling him her final decision in her mind. The unnerving sight of father and child had instilled in her a sense of guilt now; a guilt that, she was sure, would be magnified a hundredfold if she were to carry through with the course of action she had decided upon before the baby was born. And this time, it was not only Nash who would be affected by her choice…

"Sierra," he continued in a conversational tone, gently patting the bundle with his hands, "there's…there's something you should know, actually. I didn't mention it earlier, but…"

"Hmm? What is it?"

"Well, the baby's fine…you can see that. But…there is something a little strange about her."

The vampire cocked her head. "Strange? What do you mean?"

"Take a look at her right hand, old girl."

With a questioning glance at her companion, the silver-haired girl quickly unbound the loose wrappings swathed around the drowsy infant until she was able to gingerly draw out the infant's right hand. It looked perfectly fine to her; tiny and pink, as a newborn's hand should be. That is…

Her ruby eyes grew wide as she observed the small set of markings on the child's palm; circles, curliques, an elaborate set of shapes all forming around what seemed to be an oval with a circle in the middle. The markings seemed burned into the child's skin; it could not have placed on her after birth…

"What is this?" she exclaimed, her voice dropping to a low whisper as she looked up at the swordsman. "It…it cannot be…"

He shook his head. "It is," he answered. "A True Rune."

To be continued….

Author's notes: Oh geez! This chapter took me so long to do! Well, I was busy getting ready for an anime convention, and then I went on vacation to Bermuda ;) So it took me quite a while to write! I didn't even include everything I wanted in this chapter…looks like the story's going to be a little bit longer! I think maybe we'll have three more chapters before this wraps up…but please review my story! Sometimes your comments are the only things that keep me going!

Kuroi Neko-kun: Hello there! Hope this chapter was worthy, then…working hard to keep things real.

Virtue: Hmm, the baby….hehehe, it's a pretty weird kid, if you think about it. As for Sierra's decision…that'll hafta wait!

Next chapter: How could a True Rune be etched onto a newborn child's hand? And how was it that a vampire could conceive a child? Sierra needs answers, and somehow they don't seem to satisfy her...stay tuned!