DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything or anyone in Sly3, RE4, and JAKX.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Since I'm only getting good reviews, I'm really gonna continue with this story. People seem to like it.
Someone asked me what a Jak-slap is. It's the same thing as b---- slap, just a nicer and more appropriate way of saying it. My friend Sarah says it all the time.
CHAPTER SEVEN:
THE VILLAGE
After over an hour of walking with nasty, itchy mosquitoes to deal with and Sammie blabbering on about how she used to be so good with automobiles and telling Sly about this time this snobby rich girl Joyce did this and that, they finally made it back to the totally destroyed van.
"Finally!" Sammie cried as she rushed forward. She came to an abrupt stop. "Hey!" She said, pointing at the heap of metal that used to be Murray's baby. "What happened to the van?" Sly shook his head and Jennifer cracked up with laughter.
Before Jennifer could calm down from her hysteric laughter and Sammie to ask another dumb and obvious question, the wooden gate doors opened with a loud echoing creak. "Creepy," Sammie muttered under her breath as the doors stopped to reveal an abandoned, old fashioned village. Sly, Jennifer, and Sammie looked at one another.
"Well," Sly began, his eyes darting back and forth between Jennifer and the village. "Should we go in?" Jennifer held up her hands. "Don't ask me. To tell you the truth, a creepy old abandoned village would be the last place that I would step foot in."
"Same here." Sammie agreed. Sly shrugged to show he had surrendered. "Okay then we'll..." Suddenly six large wolf-like creatures with tentacles coming out of an opening in their backs popped out of nowhere. They snarled at the four and galloped towards them with their teeth bared and ears back. Sly, Sammie, and Jennifer screamed and ran with arms flailing towards the village. As soon as all three were entirely in the village, the wooden gate doors slammed shut with a loud bang, the wolves howling and scratching at the thick wood.
After three minutes of nothing but standing and listening to the wolves frantic attempts to get on the other side of the gate, the three ignored the ravaging beasts and surveyed their surroundings. "This is a weird and very creepy village." Sammie said. "I didn't even think they had villages anymore." Jennifer replied. "There's no telling what's in this village," Sly started. "This could be a criminal mastermind's hideout, or a murderers. Lets stick together and we should be okay. Alright girls. Girls?" Sly looked around for the two, but they had vanished.
"Leed-a leed-a leed-a ... LEE!" Sammie shouted as she skipped through the village. Jennifer trudged along behind her. "Sammie are you sure we can go wherever we want to go? I'm pretty sure that Sly said something about stickin together..."
"Oh, don't be a party pooper!" Sammie said. She came to a sudden stop, causing Jennifer to ram into her. "Sshh!" Sammie hissed. "What is it?" Jennifer asked hoarsely, looking completely alarmed. Sammie slowly turned around... and opened her mouth in shock. "What!" Jennifer cried. Sammie pointed behind her and Jennifer whirled around to see... nothing. Jennifer made a dirty look when she heard Sammie burst out with laughter.
"Very funny Sammie." Jennifer said turning around to face her red faced friend. Sammie calmed down enough to say, "Yes, it was very funny!" Jennifer rolled her eyes.
Sammie suddenly released a baby burp. Jennifer glanced at her. "That was weak, catch this." Jennifer hit herself on the chest, releasing a much louder burp. She looked smugly at Sammie. "Beat that."
"Fine, I will." she said, reaching into her jeans pocket and pulling out a coke. "What! How did that get in there!" Jennifer asked. Sammie paused. "I don't know. But hey, listen to this." Sammie took a long swig of coke and waited. Suddenly she let out a burp that was so loud and deep that it shook the ground and echoed throughout the village.
The young man, who was in another part of the village, felt the earth quake from Sammie's burp. "Jeez, what was that!" he cried, as he tried to keep from falling. "Is it the apocalypse or something? With this island, there's no telling what's gonna happen next."
Sammie's burp lasted a good two minutes. Jennifer laughed when Sammie stopped her earth quaking burp. "Gosh! Even I couldn't do that!" Sammie took a bow, which made Jennifer laugh harder.
They both stopped laughing when they heard a man yell in spanish behind them. They whirled around and saw over 20 or more village people with pitchforks and knives. "Uh this could be bad." Jennifer said. She started backing up when the village people started getting closer. But Sammie stood stiff-legged with her arms crossed. "Yo people!" She cried, making them stop in their tracks. One of the men yelled and pointed his finger at her. "Uh, yeah, about that," she said. "We don't speak Spanish. So just get out your English books and learn how to speak some english."
One of the women hurled a knife at Sammie, barely missing her foot. The mob started forward again, yelling in spanish. "Oh oh! Ya want a piece of me! Sammie cried. She did some 'karate' moves and struck a karate pose, preparing to "fight". "Come on Sammie!" Jennifer cried, grabbing her by the shoulder and dragging her away.
"Hey look, a rocket launcher!" Sammie yelled and pointed at a huge gun. She ran to where it was propped up against a tree and grabbed it. "Ha ha!" Sammie cried, strapping it on her shoulder. "Ya goin down, suckas!" She pulled the trigger, releasing a cloud of smoke and then a huge boom. After the smoke cleared, all the villagers were dead.
Jennifer coughed. "Gosh, Sammie, why did you have to kill everyone?" Sammie took off the now empty of rockets rocket launcher and placed it beside the tree. "Uh hello, they were trying to kill us."
"No, they were trying to kill you, not me." Sammie rolled her eyes. "Yeah right, whatever." Sammie started forward. "Come on, we should get back to Sly. Maybe he's found Murray." "Is this really Sammie talking? Or have you turned into a responsible zombie who also likes to eat people's brains?" Jennifer asked with a smirk. Sammie smiled back sweetly. "Actually zombies eat stomachs, like intestines and stuff." Jennifer immediately stopped smiling. "Ick!" she said making a face. Sammie laughed. "But seriously, we need to go find Sly. This village is turning out to be more dangerous than you or me thought." Sammie said. The girls started out to find Sly.
NOTE: If you haven't noticed already, Sammie is my friend and Jennifer is me. And two other things: the wolf-like creatures with tentacles are the Los Plagas infected mountain wolves known as Colmillos, and Sarah got the Leed-a lee thing from Patrick in Spongebob.