I present to you, Captain N 2004 Level 1.75: A New Game Master MKIII
The symbol "&" will show the thoughts of characters.
"-I" will act as a section break.
"-" has replaced all astericks, which do not show up here.
Dr. Mario, Mario, Toad, Link, Mother Brain, Samus, Eggplant Wizard, and all related characters are © to Nintendo
Kirby, Metaknight, and all related characters are © to HAL Laboratories and Nintendo
Mega Man, Bass, Dr. Wily and all related character are © to Capcom
Jinx, Geno, the Axem Rangers, and all related characters are © to Square-Enix
Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Dr. Eggman, and all related characters are © Sega
Metallix and all related characters are © Fleetway Comics and Sega
Captain N, Kevin Keene, Princess Lana, and all related characters are © DIC
Jon Jones and all related characters belong to me
All characters not already mentioned belong to their respective owners.
This story is not, in any way, related to other Captain N stories.
Some words, bolds, italics, and more seem to randomly disappear throughout the stories.
-I
INTRODUCTION TO CAPTAIN N
In the late 80s/early 90s, the people at DIC decided to make a show bringing all of the video game characters together under one show. The show would feature 15 year old Kevin Keene, his dog, and his NES controller being sucked into a TV and meeting with the various peoples of "Videoland" under the name Captain N, the Game Master. He could use his controller to freeze time, and he received a "Zapper" laser gun to fight with, but the main gimmick was that he was teamed up with four other characters: Mega Man, of the Mega Man games; Pit, of Kid Icarus; Simon Belmount, of the Castlevania games; and an original character named Princess Lana, ruler of Videoland. This "N-Team" had to battle against the team of Mother Brain, Dr. Wily, Eggplant Wizard, and King Hippo, along with many one-time villains, while at the same time finding a way to get the King of Videoland out of an alternate dimension he was stuck in.
While this is a very good concept, the presentation was lackluster. The episode plots were typical of Saturday Morning Cartoons at that time, and some very odd decisions were made. For example, Mega Man was a green midget with a squeaky voice; Samus Aran NEVER appeared, despite the main villain being Mother Brain, unless you count the comics; the locations of many episodes were from some rather obscure games, and the guest villains were just as obscure; Kevin had his dog go along with him on his missions; and Kevin lost his Zapper pretty much every episode, yelling, "Oh no, my Zapper!" every time. It is often said that this show should be remade, simply because it will always be better than the original.
I will often alter the show's continuity to fit my needs in this story, but I won't do anything real drastic, just making Kevin less silly; making everyone the correct color and have appropriate personalities; etc.
Anyway, on with the show!
-I
-I
It has been nine years since the supposed death of Kevin Keene, Kevin's dog, and Princess Lana. What was the cause of death? No one knows, as no bodies were found. In fact, no one, not even the N-Team, Captain N's teammates, knew exactly how they died or when they disappeared. One day, Mega Man, Simon Belmont, and Pit, members of the N-Team, just woke up in Princess Lana's castle, without either Kevin or the princess. The second-in-command immediately took over.
At this point, Ridley, leader of the Space Pirates, realized that Mother Brain's organization never succeeded with any of its missions, and when Captain N was finally killed, it was due to someone else, so he ceased funding and the organization disbanded. With no major group to fight against, the N-Team saw no point in staying together and went back to their respective worlds.
Unfortunately, due to displeasure over some of the new King's policies, many regions seceded, forming the world of Sega. The rivalry between Sega and Videoland, now known as Nintendo (Videoland is now used to describe the entire video game world), caused great developments in both nations, quite similar to the Cold War. However, a new nation named Sony, which had been formed by citizens of countries ruined by the war between Sega and Nintendo, starting taking over lands, including Sega, forcing many citizens to flee back to Nintendo or the new nation of Microsoft. However, while Sony has recently settled down with its takeovers, everything may not be in equilibrium in the video game world.
-I
-I
Meanwhile, in our world's present, fifteen-year-old Jon Jones was a nerd. He was one ever since he laid his eyes on an older kid playing an NES at a store when he was only 1 year old. While playing sports video games and shooters is supposedly cool, play anything else and you're a nerd, and that's exactly what Jon was. Even today, when video games are becoming increasingly mainstream, game geeks are only a few levels above being a Trekky or a D&Der-. Jon learned to not go crazy when people bought bad games early in life, but he still cringed when he saw someone buy Rugrats: Royal Ransom when Super Mario Sunshine was right next to it. Jon's black hair went halfway down his forehead and was combed to his right, but the rest of his hair seemed to be ignored in the combing process. His skin was surprisingly tan compared to most game nerds, which was not to say that he was tan, just tanner. His brown eyes were narrow, a habit he developed as he played video games, giving him a tired appearance, with narrow glasses covering them up, and for a nerd, he had a strangely low amount of zits, but it still enough to scare the girls away. Jon was about 5'7", and while he wasn't what people would consider skinny, he didn't fit the stereotype of the fat game geek. However, like a nerd, you would have a hard time finding muscles anywhere. On that fateful day that this chapter is about, Jon Jones was wearing a blue T-shirt, blue jeans, and black tennis shoes.
-Author's Note: This may or may not be true where you live, but just pretend it is where this part of the story takes place.
It was, at first, like any other day. He woke up early in the morning to perfect his Super Smash Bros. Melee skills, as there was a tournament at the local game store in only a week, but he soon realized that he still didn't finish his homework, so he quickly killed 100 wireframe men in Cruel Melee and got to his assignment. Thankfully, he finished before his parents woke up and saw that his paper was incomplete, so Jon's dad left for work afterwards and Jon ate breakfast with his mom and sister in front of the TV. Following that, Jon left for school on the bus, playing his GBA in a seat by himself. He was annoyed by the fact that the high-schoolers had to share the bus with the middle-schoolers, but he ignored them until the Sixth Graders started inexplicably screaming. Apparently, someone had opened a water bottle and accidentally spilled some on the floor. Jon sighed as he went back to his game.
The bus got to the school and Jon went to his classes. He got his algebra test back, getting a B-, like usual. Jon went to the Video Game Club's room, nicknamed Geek Island, during lunch and socialized with his nerdy friends. During a break, there was a rare instance when a decent-looking girl hit on him, but he blew it by talking to her about how awesome Metroid Prime 2 was going to be. When she ran away, Jon realized that he should have been talking about something else. "&But I already tried movies, cartoons, and comics. What else is there&?" Jon thought.
Being a man of great philosophy, Jon wondered about the mysteries of the universe as he walked to and from classes. "&Why is my backpack so much bigger than everyone else's? Even the people who share all of my classes have smaller ones than me. Why is that? Is it because they use their locker? I thought people in high school didn't use their lockers. I guess they were wrong. I guess I would use my locker if I actually knew where it was. What was my locker number again? B-458206298956650863456995695769562612647? Seriously, it could help if they said where the B lockers are. I must have looked around the entire school for it&."
The school day ended and Jon repeated the bus ride, except it went back to his neighborhood. He stepped out when the bus got to his stop, but someone bumped into him, launching a picture out of his notebook, but the aforementioned guy picked it up for him. The guy, who was much larger than Jon and was wearing a shirt with the phrase "X-Box God", commented, "Whoa, this is pretty cool. What is it?"
"It's a picture of Tengu Man from Mega Man 8," Jon said. "Cool, huh?"
"Mega Man? That kiddy crap! If you want to play a REAL shooting game, get Halo for the X-Box, but since you're immature enough to play 'Mega Kiddy', you'll probably want to get that stupid Legend of Celda: The Wind Breaker game instead!"
"Actually, 'Celda' has a deeper plot than Halo."
"Riiiiiiiiiiiight, you just keep telling yourself that." He seemed to be an X-Box fanboy. To be fair, there is a large difference between X-Box owners and fanboys.
As Jon continued listing Halo's flaws, keeping it clear that he thought it was a good, but overrated game, the Halo fanboy got angry and chased after the nonbeliever with great prejudice. The pursuit lasted a few minutes and the chaser got tired, with the chased following a few seconds later. When he reached his house, his mom, who assumed that the bus broke down that day like usual, told him to do his homework. Instead, he went up to his room and started a new game of Metroid Prime, which he beat in a record time of fifty-seven minutes. "&I never broke the one hour mark before&!" Jon thought as he quickly took a picture of his time and got up to eat dinner. He would break the news to his nerdy friends while he ate dinner, via AIM.
Suddenly, TV screen started shaking and glowing. Jon stared in awe as the TV sucked him in, along with his GameCube and GBA.
NOW LOADING...
LEVEL ONE: Press Start
Because people use the word 1337 in real life…
Jon tumbled through a multicolored tunnel, wildly searching the area for human life. "WTF IS GOING ON!" he yelled. No one answered him. "HELLO! IS ANYONE THERE!" This sort of thing never happened to him before. After a while, his throat dried and he started to calm down about this odd turn of events. He searched his pockets and, to his relief, he pulled out his Game Boy Advance, along with his many games. At this point, he noticed that he had his GameCube controller was in his other pocket, but decided not to think much of it. After playing on his system for a while, Jon noticed a white space in the middle of the colorful tunnel. "&What's that&?" he thought as he shut off his GBA and flew into it.
The next thing Jon knew, he was in a world with green grass and cloudless blue skies. He was at first relieved that he was out of the seizure-fest, but he then noticed that the ground was rushing toward him rather quickly. Before he could scream, the nerd crashed into the earth and was knocked unconscious.
-I
-I
Later…
"Ugh..." Jon managed to squeeze out as he started to get up. He appeared to be in some sort of hospital room.
"Wait! Try-a not to-a move!" said the doctor, who had an Italian accent.
"What?" Jon asked. That voice was familiar. When he saw the doctor's short stature and overly large head, nose, and eyes, Jon jumped back a little on his bed, breathing hard. He now fully understood why animé characters would never work in real life. The problem was, this didn't look like real life.
"Sir-a, it would-a probably-a be best for-a you to just-a lie down," the doctor said. Though Jon was still freaked out by his appearance, he complied. "I'll-a come back after-a a few minutes-a once you-a can figure out what happened-a.
The high-schooler calmed down and decided to start thinking rationally. "&What's going on? Where am I? Was that really Dr. Mario I just saw? How is that possible? I must be in a real hospital and my doctor happened to be an Italian midget... with a deformed face. And that warp-thing was just my imagination. Yeah, that's it. But why am I in the hospital? If I remember correctly, I was just playing Metroid Prime, when I was sucked into my TV. No, that's not what happened. What else then? There was a bright flash of light, so maybe I had a case of epilepsy, like all those Japanese kids during that banned episode of Pokémon with Porygon? But I never had epilepsy before, so why now? I beat Metroid Prime hundreds of times before and the ending never did anything except bore me. Maybe that bright flash was the TV blowing up in my face? Yeah, that's it; the blast probably knocked my head into the wall, explaining why it hurts so much. But what could have caused it to blow up? Meh, I'll just ask Mom and Dad that once they get here. Ugh, my head hurts, I'm sure they won't mind if I have a few aspirins&." Jon got up with some effort and looked at some jars.
"&Super Mushroom Powder? Starman Extract? Blue Potion? Maxim Tomato Sauce? Cup of Lifenoodles? Large Energy Pellets? Strange... ah, here it is, aspirin&!" Jon thought as he opened up the bottle, filled up a cup with water, took out a few aspirins, and swallowed each using the water. He then sat back down and turned on his GBA. "&I wonder if it's a really good idea to play on my GBA with a headache like this? Wait a minute, this isn't where I saved before! I do remember saving here during that warp fantasy, though... Meh, I probably just forgot where I saved and I was reminded of it during that dream, nothing to worry about&."
After a while of playing, the door opened. Expecting the doctor, Jon quickly shut off his game system and lied down, but instead, an anthropomorphic mushroom walked in. Jon stared at him. He walked up to one of the jars, picked it up, and walked out of the door. "&Okay, Jon, that wasn't a toad. That was just one of those male nurses I've heard about. And he's a midget too. The aspirin still needs a while to start working. Okay, when the doctor comes in, just treat him like a normal one. No freaking out&," Jon thought as he waited.
Eventually, the doctor who looked like Dr. Mario came in. "Ah, have you-a come back to-a your-a senses yet?"
"Yeah, I guess. How did I get knocked out?"
"We don't-a know. We just-a found-a you lying in the-a middle of the field-a."
"Field? What was I doing in a field?"
"I-a told you-a, we don't-a know, okie-dokie? We-a think it was-a a fall, though-a, which could-a be caused by-a you going through-a an interregional warp while-a that region is-a being locked-a down. Is-a something happening in-a your region!"
"...What?"
"Your region-a! Is-a something happening in-a your-a region!"
"Region? What do you mean?"
"Hmm-a, you-a seem to be-a showing-a signs of-a Locked Warp-a Sickness. I still-a need-a to make-a sure though-a. What's your-a name?"
"Jon Jones."
"Mr.-a Jones, do you-a recognize-a those-a people?" Dr. Mario said, pointing to a framed picture.
"They're Mario and Luigi."
"What about-a him?"
"Donkey Kong."
"Him-a?"
"Kirby."
"Him-a?"
"Captain Falcon."
"You-a aren't-a just some kid-a trying to-a sneak into-a the King's room? After-a all, your-a name sounds fake-a."
"No, I don't even know what you're talking about!"
"I suppose-a I might-a as well-a have you see-a the King-a. Follow-a me." Dr. Mario walked out of the door and Jon staggered after him with his still-hurt head.
"&This is really starting to disprove my headache theory. Maybe this is all a dream. Maybe I'm lying unconscious in an actual hospital and I'm dreaming all of this. Too bad I can't control my dreams that well. I guess I'll just go with the flow until I wake up. I guess once I get used to it, this is a pretty cool dream. After all, Dr. Mario is leading me across a hallway! And I'm about to meet the King! I wonder if I'll be able to see Mario himself! Those pictures prove that other video game characters live here too! Maybe that's what Dr. Mario went by regions! Each region is a different game world! This is getting really cool! I wonder how they'd react to me being from the Real World&!" Jon thought as he and Dr. Mario went down the various hallways.
-I
-I
MEANWHILE...
"I have to thank you for helping rebuilding me. It would have taken years without your help," a very deep, monotone voice said to a shadowed figure.
"You can thank me by finding some more people, Mother Brain. My plan won't work unless I have enough help," the shaded figure said.
"Ah yes, I've heard about this plan of yours from Lord Ridley. The Space Pirate Organization will offer assistance, but I hope you understand that this quest won't be our main focus and thus, you will receive little help from our troops. We are aware of your importance, but this goal of yours is little good to us, with many worlds here that are still undiscovered. You should be thankful, though, that Lord Ridley even bothered to see you and offer help, and that I, Mother Brain, head computer of the organization, was put in charge of this project instead of someone else," the large brain responded.
"Yes, I understand. Considering that, could it be possible to get help from someone outside of the organization? Preferably someone with a large army."
"I suppose so. I used to work with someone who controlled a large army of robots, Dr. Albert Wily, back during the days of Kevin Keene, if you remember."
"He will do just fine."
-I
-I
BACK AT THE CASTLE…
"Jeez, how big IS this castle? Jon asked Dr. Mario. Though he was convinced that this was all a dream, he was still getting pretty tired.
"Don't-a worry, we're almost-a there!" said the doctor. A few minutes later, they came to a huge door with chains and an eye, which Dr. Mario put a Big Key in, causing it to open.
As the two walked in, Jon looked around the throne room. He saw food, TVs, security cameras, guards, etc., but something was missing. "Where's the King?" Jon asked Dr. Mario. Almost on cue, a black stick figure with a similarly colored cape and crown seemed to appear out of nowhere, turned to the side in a way that made it seem like he had very few sprites and beeped. Since he was a 2-D figure, his thinness made it impossible for him to be seen by the side. "Mr. Game and Watch is the King? And he has Waddle Dee guards," Jon asked.
"Yup-a," Dr. Mario responded.
Dr. Mario then handed Jon a pair of headphones that fit comfortably into his ears, mentioning that he would need it to understand what the King was saying. The doctor was already wearing a pair.
The beeping then transformed into English. "Beep beep beep any reason you came to see me, Doctor?"
"&His first name's Doctor&?" assumed Jones.
"King President, I-a have reasons-a to believe that-a this boy is-a a Game Master!" exclaimed Dr. Doctor Mario.
"&King President&?" thought Jon.
"Really? What kind of rea-" Game and Watch asked.
"&Wait, I remember hearing about a Game Master&," Jon's thoughts interrupted the King. "&Yeah, it was from that 80's show about that kid getting sucked into his TV into the world of video games. That should be familiar. The show was a disgrace to video gamers, though, so I didn't pay much attention. Maybe I'm a new Game Master, to repeat what Dr. Mario said&?"
"-sons?" Game and Watch finished asking.
"He shows signs of Locked Warp Sickness, with the selective memory loss, but he seems to recognize people from various zones, and he doesn't seem to be pretending!"
"There's only one way to make sure. Do you have a controller?"
Jon fished through his pockets and pulled out his Game Cube controller.
"Hmmm... It doesn't look like Kevin's, so there's only one way to make sure it's real," commented the president-king-thing. "... Wait, what's your name? I don't believe you've told us that yet."
Some cheesy heroic music plays as Jon says, "My name is Jon." There is a big close up into his face as he says, "Jon Jones." The chapter then ended.
However, Scorpion from Mortal Kombat then appeared and yelled, "GET OVER HERE!" as he threw a chain, impaled everyone reading, and brought them back in. The chapter wasn't over after all.
"Mr. Jones, press the START button on your controller. If you're really a Game Master, time should freeze when you press it, and if it works, walk to the other side of the room and unfreeze," explained King/President Game and Watch.
"You mean like a Pause?" asked Jon, recalling that ability being used by the main character of the Captain N show.
"Yes, like a pause," answered the stick figure.
Jon pressed the start button. When nothing happened, Game and Watch said, "...Sorry, but you apparently aren't a Game Master. You should know the punishment for pretending to be one. Guards, take him away, but keep the controller incase it's real."
Game and Watch's Waddle Dee guards (with spears) jumped up and started running, though hopping would be a more accurate description, toward Jon, but they suddenly stopped. In mid air. "&What&?" thought Jon. Realizing that the controller worked, Jon walked to the other side of the room and unpaused. Thankfully, the unpause didn't have the same delay. The Waddle Dees crashed into each other and King Game and Watch looked at Jon.
"Hmmm... it seems you are, in fact, a Game Master. I'm sorry for doubting you," commented the King.
"It's okay," the Game Master assured the president.
"It's strange that a controller that seems so much more advanced than Kevin's would have a delay. Perhaps there's more to it?"
"Maybe, but you need to answer some of my questions. Where am I?"
"Your-a in the wonderful world of-a Nintendo!" answered Dr. Mario, who made sure that people didn't forget that he was still there.
"So wait, I was just sucked into my TV and I ended up here?"
"Looks-a like it. Kevin appeared-a in a similar-a fashion-a."
"Wait, who's Kevin? And why is being a Game Master so important?" Jon only had vague memories of the show.
Game and Watch explained, "Kevin Keene was the first Game Master. Game Masters are people, usually around 15 years of age, who know everything there is to know about video games. However, they also posses a special power that allows them to freeze time through use of a controller, and usually have incredible aim. Kevin was a part of a team of already established heroes, including Mega Man, Pit, Simon Belmont, Kevin's dog, and the ruler of Nintendo, Videoland back then, Princess Lana, called the N-Team, and they fought foes across all regions of Nintendo, focusing mainly on the Space Pirate organization, which is much more widespread than you might imagine. Around ten years ago, Kevin, along with Princess Lana, disappeared. Kevin appeared in a similar way to you, except his arrival was expected, due to the fact that they supposedly created a warp to the Real World to get help on purpose. However, it was later discovered that they simply interrupted an already existing warp to the Real World, so something was already bringing Kevin into this world. There are several theories about this, but nothing has been proven yet, though it isn't hard to guess that the same force brought you here. You are obviously wondering how to get back, right?"
"I guess," Jon replied. It didn't occur to him that he might not be able to get back to the conscious world until now. This dream felt too real for a normal dream.
"The legends state that there exists a special gate called the Ultimate Warp Gate that allows a person to travel into the Real World."
"Do you have any idea where the warp is?" Jon asked.
"Nope-a," said Dr. Mario.
"Does this universe's time go at the same pace as the Real World's?"
"Yup-a"
"And do you realize that this world is used for entertainment in Real Life, but you don't care!"
"Yup-a. Just-a because we are entertainment in-a the Real World doesn't change-a the fact that that we live here and have-a lives. Not-a all of our adventures are shown in your world!"
"I think I should leave you alone for a while so you can soak this all in. For now, you can stay in one of the guest bedrooms," Game and Watch said as he looked through a cabinet and pulled out a capsule, throwing it onto the floor. It exploded, creating a strange spiraling patch of red and blue light on its side. "Jump in to reach your room, and if you get hungry, there is a cabinet full of labeled capsules. One leads to the kitchen. Once you leave, a capsule leading back here will be placed in your pocket, and likewise, a capsule back to your room will appear in your pocket once you leave it through the warp. By the way, remember to meet me back here tomorrow afternoon. I'll break the news about the new Game Master to my cabinet members!"
Jon stepped in and it brought him to a large bedroom, like the King said. Jon wasted no time in finding the television and turned it on in order to find out what video game characters watched.
"And-a remember kids, clean-a is better than-a dirty, and dirty is-a meaner than clean!" Mario said, ending the public service announcement.
-I
-I
OVERWORLD: PLANET SR388 REMAINS...
(This location-thing will be explained later)
"It's nice that you're meeting an old employer, BUT DID YOU HAVE TO BRING ME ALONG!" a black-armored robot named Bass yelled at his creator, Dr. Wily.
"Be quiet! We've needed money ever since the government learned how to tell the difference between Crystal Man's crystals and real ones!" Dr. Wily responded as he flew a larger version of his UFO toward a Space Pirate ship. "Besides, it would be nice to actually work together, instead of you running around in a rather psychotic manner after Mega Man.
"Ohhhhhhhhh, working with an idiot like you would bring me SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much joy," the robot that wasn't a fish sarcastically said.
"I'm beginning to regret building you in the first place."
"Hey! At least I stole plans for that 'Mega Man X' robot Light's making so you can make that girly red robot you always wanted to make. What was his name again? She-ro?"
"His name is 'Zero'! Hey, we're here!"
"Oh, goody!" Bass said as he rolled his eyes.
DUNGEON: SPACE PIRATE MOTHER SHIP...
Dr. Wily landed his UFO in the ship's docking bay and they went inside, but not before Wily put on a space suit. Most of the defense systems were deactivated, but the outer areas didn't fill up with oxygen yet.
"Huh?" Bass said. He obviously saw something.
"SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" screeched a jellyfish alien as it grabbed onto Wily's helmet.
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!" yelled Bass.
"It's a metroid! Quick! Use your Blizzard Blast before it pierces through my helmet and sucks out all of my energy!" Wily said in a panicked voice and started running around in circles screaming. After a few missed blasts, Bass finally froze it off, and they continued. When they entered a large room with lava pools and deactivated cannons, Wily took off his helmet.
"Jeez, this place is dirtier than Dustman's room!" Bass commented," And why the hell is there a giant brain here?"
"Welcome, Wily. I see you have brought a visitor," Mother Brain said.
"...Whoa! It talks! Let's see what Astro Man thinks about this!" Bass exclaimed as he took a picture of Mother Brain.
"Wily, I trust that you know what to do?"
"Do... Oh right, invade the King's Castle?"
"Remember, the invasion is only a distraction for when we take the map cartridge. However, you must do it today, and use a robot master that could remove the safe without touching the lasers!"
"Why today? " asked Wily. "I'm a very busy man, you know!"
"Then I suppose I'll just pay someone else to do this job. We can't waste Space Pirate troops on such a mission, but I could always go to Dr. Eggman for this..."
"Okay, I'll do it today! I already have a fleet armed and ready anyway... But why do I have to do it today?"
"It appears that somehow, a new Game Master came to this world-"
"A NEW GAME MASTER! WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN!"
"Just yesterday. We have to attack today because he has yet to go through training and he hasn't gathered an N-Team."
"Take over the King's Castle?" Bass asked," Perhaps I underestimated your old job."
-I
-I
THE NEXT DAY AT THE CASTLE
Jon Jones woke up and turned on the TV, eating some breakfast... and stuff. He also took a bath, changed his clothes, etc. This was unheard of in Nintendo. And thankfully, it wasn't heard of again, as Jon's new suit always kept him clean, removing the need of bathes; injected nanobots to disintegrate all waste products, removing the need for a bathroom; injected stimulant that stimulates the hair, removing the need for gel; gave Jon the ability to recover energy from eating and going back to max stats when he sleeps; and other stuff. There was nothing on TV but some B movies that happened to have video games, so he went down to the Throne Office, via warp. He landed in front of the door.
"Welcome, Game Master!" said a Waddle Dee guard. "Unfortunately, the King is out, so he sent a replacement."
"What kind of replacement?" asked Jon.
"Just jump into the warp," the Waddle Dee answered as he threw down a warp. Jon hesitantly stepped in, to find himself in an place similar to those areas where Bowser Jr. would steal FLUDD in Super Mario Sunshine, with the funky remix of the upperworld Super Mario Bros. theme. It was a very large, open, groundless area with several large objects and platforms floating on the air.
Now, sometimes during the story, I'll put a musical cue for some events. That means that the song of music piece listed should be playing or be going through your mind. However, feel free to ignore it. Also, don't worry, these musical cues aren't very common.
"The Funky (I Think It's Called Capeorci Or Something Like That) Remix of the SMB Upperworld Theme From SM Sunshine"
"Welcome Game Master! Would you like to learn how to use your controller?" said Toad, who just walked in from the left. Two buttons appeared in front of Jon: one saying, "YES", and the other saying, "NO".
"Where did that music come from?"
Toad stood there tapping his foot impatiently.
"Oh, right. Not re-"
"DON'T TALK, DAMMIT!"
Jon had a look of surprise, as any man would after being yelled at by a talking mushroom. He pressed "NO".
"Are you sure? These skills could really help you! So will you learn?"
Jon chose "NO" again.
"Are you sure? These skills could really help you! So will you learn?"
"You alread-"
"NO SPEAKING, DAMN YOU!"
Jon, after a pause, chose "NO" again.
"Are you sure? These skills could reall-"
Jon, with a sigh, interrupted Toad by choosing "YES"
"Great, let's get started! First of all, press the pause button to freeze time!"
"I already know th-"
Jon stood there confused by how someone could say "!", but he eventually pressed PAUSE. After a few seconds, which now featured a ticking sound that Jon never noticed before, all of the moving platforms stopped in their tracks. Strangely enough, Toad kept moving.
"Great! You may notice the platforms have stopped moving. This is very useful, as it will also freeze your opponents."
"How are you still moving?"
"Though you aren't supposed to talk, I will explain how. You may have noticed how in Super Mario RPG, when I explain a minigame, t-"
"Time suddenly freezes! Thus, you have the ability to freeze time!"
" :mad: "
Though Jon was confused by how Toad could say five exclamation points, he was even more baffled by how Toad could say an emoticon.
"Now, soon before you appeared, some of the guards discovered an 'E-Card'. When you appeared, we realized that it might have something to do with that slit with a large E on the back of your controller."
Jon looked at the back of his controller in surprise. He assumed that it looked like it always did, not for it to have fused with his GBA's E-Reader. "Where is it?" asked Jon.
Suddenly, eight small castles popped up in various places in the funky world they were in. "There are eight castles, each with one of my relatives. One of them has the E-Card, and in order to reach the castles, you must skillfully use your PAUSE to cross the platforms. Don't worry about falling, because a lakitu will pick you up if you do. GO!"
End "The Funky (I Think It's Called Capeorci Or Something Like That) Remix of the SMB Upperworld Theme From SM Sunshine"
Jon walked up to a platform, paused, and got on it. He found that only the first platform needed to be PAUSED. After a few more platforms, he reached the castle.
"I'm sorry, but the E-Card is in another castle," the Toad there said.
Jon went through some more platforms and came to another castle.
"I'm sorry, but the E-Card is in another castle," the Toad there said.
After the second castle, Jon thought, "This is taking way to long. Wait... of course!" Jon then jumped into the bottomless pit, forcing a lakitu to pick him up. However, when he climbed onto the cloud, he pushed the lakitu off and took control of it. Thankfully, the lakitu landed on one of the platforms... what, did you expect me to kill it? I'm not that cruel! Anyway, Jon went to the other castles using the cloud, and at the last one...
"Yes, we have your E-Card! Get your weapons ready!" said the Toad as he gave Jon the E-Card. Suddenly, a large message saying, "MINIGAME COMPLETED! YOU GOTTEN...THE E-CARD! Slide it through your E-Reader and see what happens!" popped up it front of the bewildered Game Master. He was too startled to see what the first part said before it disappeared, so he only read it from, "THE E-CARD!" on. Jon looked at the picture on the E-Card, which featured something that he instantly recognized: The NES's Light Gun. And sure enough, when he slid it through, the controller glowed and morphed into a classic Light Gun. However, instead of a trigger, there were two buttons, along with a third on the top. Suddenly, there was a flash and he found himself back with the first Toad.
"The Funky (I Think It's Called Capeorci Or Something Like That) Remix of the SMB Upperworld Theme From SM Sunshine"
"Good job! Now let's see how it works!" said the Toad. "Press the large green button labeled 'A'."
Jon did that and a red beam of light flew out.
"Pressing A will shoot out a weak blast of light. Why don't you try pressing B?"
Jon, again, did that and a bunch of small red orbs started flying into the gun and after a few seconds, a thick red beam of light flew out.
"Pressing B will shoot a stronger blast of energy, but it must first power up. Now, the START button seems to be moved to the top, so try pressing it."
Jon did and the Light Gun morphed back into a controller.
"Pressing START will-"
"I kn-"
"NO TALKING, DAMMIT! Anyway, let's practice your aim," Toad said as five moving bulls-eyes popped up. Jon transformed his controller into the Light Gun and shot them effortlessly.
"I guess all of those hours of playing Duck Hunt from a distance paid off," commented a o0'd Jon.
"With gun skills like that, why didn't you become a hired gunman?"
"Game guns and real guns are different. Real guns are heavier and recoil when used, and they have an entirely different feel... or at least I guess they do..."
End "The Funky (I Think It's Called Capeorci Or Something Like That) Remix of the SMB Upperworld Theme From SM Sunshine"
"Trust me, they do. Whelp, my work's done. Bye," Toad said as he threw a capsule at Jon, which exploded and sent Jon back to his room. Thus, he watched some TV, played on his GBA, and slept, sometimes at the same time... which is pretty much my Winter Break summed up in three phrases. However, he eventually decided to go downstairs.
Jon walked around, having no idea where he was going, but he eventually noticed a deactivated MechaKoopa, a robotic Koopa Troopa, with a coin slot in his forehead and a sign saying, "Insert ten (10) coins for tour. Insérez dix (10) coins pour l'excursion. Inserte diez (10) coins para el viaje. ?10 (10) coins ?."
Jon, assuming that meant ten quarters, fished some out of his pocket and put them in the MechaKoopa. However, the robot yelled, "Only coins are accepted for this tour!" and repeated it in several different languages as he spat out the quarters.
"&Oh, that's what he meant by coins. Now where can I get some coins&?" Jon thought.
Jon noticed a nearby machine that would exchange currency. He put in his ten quarters and got back ten coins. "&Dollars must exist here in Nintendo, and I guess there are four coins to a dollar&," Jon thought as he put the coins in the MechaKoopa and it started up.
"Welcome to our tour of the Presidential Castle in the Main Region. Please follow me," it said as it started walking away. Jon followed. Suddenly, a bunch of tourists who were just standing around followed him too, after putting in their own coins. This made Jon the nerd uncomfortable. They went through almost of the rooms in the three story castle with a basement. The first floor had guest reception, the kitchen, the dining hall, Dr. Mario's office, etc. The second floor had more personal things, such as a reading room, a meeting room, bedrooms, guest bedrooms, etc. The third floor featured the defense system controls and the miniature golf course. The basement contained the plumbing, electrical, etc., and some very important items, so the tour didn't actually go down there. Eventually, the tour led outside. It was now dark and you could clearly see the stars. "...And that concludes this part of the tour. Any questions?"
The tourists asked very stupid questions. I won't go into detail, because I don't feel like making fun of tourists.
"&...Is it just me, or do the stars look really strange&?" Jon thought. The stars were red, blue, purple, and seemed to be pretty close compared to Real World stars. He decided not to think much of it.
-I
-I
It was night and the tour of the castle had ended. Jon was about to walk back into the castle when a hard hat fell in front of him. "Wha?" said Jon.
"Heat Man's Theme From Mega Man 2 (or the Remix From Mega Man: the Power Fighters)"
The hard hat popped up, revealing a Metool, which shot a blast at the surprised Game Master. He jumped out of the way and shot a blast at the unsuspecting Metool, making it blow up.
"What's a Metool doing here?" Jon asked himself. He saw the gardeners looking up and running into the castle, so he looked up himself to find a huge skull-shaped ship dropping enemies. "&It must be Dr. Wily&!" He saw some enemies being dropped down, so he decided to shoot them while they were in the air. Cannons appeared out of the sides of the castle, firing both Bullet and Banzai Bills. The Bills tore through the robots and seemed to be doing decent damage to the ship.
"&I guess they can take care of the ship themselves. I better go inside&," Jon thought as he did what he said.
End "Heat Man's Theme From Mega Man 2 (or the Remix From Mega Man: the Power Fighters)"
As soon as he came in, he noticed that there were robots inside, too. A whale robot from Mega Man 8 fired some bird enemies at Jon, but he briskly shot at them using his Light Gun before they could fire their fans. He then shot a B-Blast at the whale itself, making a direct hit, and the whale dropped an ice cube onto the ground. A nearby Sniper Joe kicked it to the Game Master, but Jon quickly jumped out of the way and shot at him. The Sniper Joe blocked it with his shield and shot a plasma blast at the nerd, but Jon ducked and it barely whizzed over his head. Suddenly, a third robot crashed into him from behind, hurting him legs and causing him to fall over. "&There must have been a penguin robot in the ice cube&, Jon thought. The Sniper Joe tossed a grenade to Jon and ducked, but Jon picked up the grenade and threw it back. The grenade blew up, but it didn't destroy the robot. On the ground, Jon rapidly shot the penguin until it exploded and he struggled to get up, since his legs were still hurt from when the penguin crashed into him. The whale shot out some more birds and Jon decided to press PAUSE. However, during the delay, one of the bird's fans cut Jon's right arm. Time paused right after that and Jon kneeled over in pain. After lying there for a while, he ran to look for some scissors and running water, clutching his arm. He found scissors in a cabinet and used it to cut off part of the window drapes, and he found water in an already-on faucet and put the cloth through it. The Game Master wrapped the cloth around his wound tightly and tied it up.
At this point, Jon noticed that the fan, which flew past him, was about to explode when time paused and he got an idea. He walked back into the room with the robot and positioned the fan right next to one of the birds. The fan stayed in the air due to time being frozen. Jon tried to move the birds, along with the fans, near the whale so that the explosion would harm it too, making sure not to use his right arm, but he found that he couldn't move them. "I guess I can't move robots," he thought, and instead positioned the fans next to the birds. Jon then tried to open the door out of the room, but a sign similar to the one when he got the E-Card popped up, saying:
"YOU NEED TO DESTROY ALL OF THE ENEMIES TO UNLOCK THE DOOR!"
Jon sighed. "&Hmm, I wonder if I can shoot while time is frozen&." Jon slid his E-Card through his controller, but when it transformed, time unpaused, and the fans destroyed the birds. The Game Master quickly shot at the Sniper Joe, destroying it, and rapidly shot at the whale, also destroying it. With this, the door opened to the music that plays when doors are opened in The Legend of Zelda games. Jon walked through and made his way down the hallway, trying to remember where Dr. Mario's office was. He came across a few Metools, but he easily took care of them. Eventually, he found Dr. Mario's office and ran to the door to find that it was locked. "Dr. Mario, are you okay?" Jon asked.
"Jon-a? Is that-a you?" Dr. Mario asked.
"Yeah."
The door unlocked and Dr. Mario opened it. "Jon, get in-a here quick-a!"
Jon walked in and the door slammed shut. "Dr. Mario, do you have anything I could use to heal this?" Jon asked, pointing to his arm wound.
"Of-a course!" Dr. Mario said as he pulled out a Mushroom. Jon ate it and he found that his wound turned into a small paper cut, so he removed the cloth.
"Why isn't anyone from another region coming to help?"
"They-a can't! This-a region is-a locked!"
"Locked?"
"During-a invasions, the invaders usually-a lock that region-a to prevent-a anyone from-a helping. This-a is why, for-a example, no one-a comes to help-a when Dr.-a Eggman is invading-a M-Earth-a or when-a Princess Peach-a is kidnapped by-a Bowser or-a right now. By the-a way, you-a really need-a to go into-a the-a basement!"
"Why the basement? Wouldn't it be more important to protect the King?"
"Don't-a worry about-a him, he's-a very well protected-a. However, I've-a been hearing explosions-a in-a the basement, and-a there are-a many important items-a down-a there! Take some-a Mushrooms with-a you, but-a remember, they aren't-a much good for-a large wounds-a!"
"Uh... okay..." Jon said as he grabbed four Mushrooms and shoved them into his pocket. He didn't realize then that he could have put them inside his Game Boy Advance. He then ran out of the room and tried to figure out where the entrance to the basement was.
-I
-I
After a few minutes, Jon found a map, similar to the ones in malls, and headed toward the basement entrance. When he got to it, he found that it was now a smoking hole. "&I guess Dr. Mario was right about the explosions. The door must have been locked&," he thought as he gathered up his courage and walked in. Above him, Jon noticed a message appearing above him, similar to the one when he got the E-Card.
"DUNGEON: CASTLE BASEMENT..."
"Creepy Dungeon Music From A Random RPG (I'm Not Exactly An Expert At RPGs)"
"&Dungeon? I hope there aren't any random battles...&" Jon thought as he went down the stairs. He eventually decided to pause and went down the hallway with everything frozen around him and came to another blown up door. Continuing on, he found more holes like that, until he reached a white room with tables covered with chemical-filled beakers, computers, and papers. Jon walked through the laboratory, which obviously had some very important data, due to the security and secrecy of the area, when he noticed a warp to another area that was about to close. Still in pause mode, Jon walked into the warp, only to have nothing happen. "&I guess I need to unpause to make it work&," Jon thought as he unpaused and was whisked off to another area.
The Game Master found himself in a hallway with a dead end on one side and another blown up door on the other. The geek immediately paused again and went through the hole. In the room was a safe on top of a pedestal, protected by various lasers. In the Video Game Universe, the stronger the laser, the easier it is to see, so these lasers were bright red. Near the pedestal, the Game Master noticed another figure. He was slightly taller than Jon, was anthropomorphic, had gray cones for hands, and appeared to be wearing red armor. Jon hid behind the wall and unpaused to see what he was doing.
"Crash Man's Theme From Mega Man 2"
The red figure shot off his cone hands at the top of the pedestal, near the safe, revealing that his hands were actually bombs. The resulting explosion knocked the safe out of the barrier formed by the lasers and onto the ground. The figure then shot four bombs that stuck to the corners of the safe and blew off the door. Inside was what seemed to be a NES cartridge, which the figure picked up and stared at in disbelief. "Dammit, I should have known it would be this old! I should have had Wily give me an older system before this! My current system's still compatible with this, but this will feel really funky," the figure said to himself as he shoved the cartridge into his forehead, apparently into a cartridge slot. "Transferring data now..."
End "Crash Man's Theme From Mega Man 2"
Deciding that whatever the figure was doing was bad, Jon transformed his controller into his Light Gun, ran out from behind the wall, and started shooting at the figure. The figure was knocked back a bit and the cartridge shot out of his head on to the ground. He quickly turned around and shot one of his bombs at Jon, but the Game Master ran back behind the wall, avoiding it.
"Hmm, you must be that new Game Master I've heard about. I didn't notice anyone following me, so the only way you could have gone through the warp in time was to use that pause skill of yours!" said the figure.
"Uh... &Gah, what's a witty comeback&? ... Thank you?" Jon replied.
"Thank you! That's an odd thing to say, especially from someone as ugly as you! That's right, you're ugly, and you smell bad, too! I do like your pants, though, so says the Incredible CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" the figure, revealed to be the Robot Master known as Crash Man yelled as he started posing.
"Robot Master Jingle"
While the robot was posing, Jon jumped out from behind the wall and fired a B-Shot, making a direct hit. Crash Man was knocked into the nearby wall due to that blast.
End "Robot Master Jingle"
"Okay, now you made me mad, Dandruff Boy!" Crash Man said.
"Well... uhh... At least I have hands!" Jon replied.
"I have hands, too," Crash Man pointed out as he transformed his cone hands into normal ones with white gloves and then changed them back.
"...Oh... &Maybe I should just stop trying to converse with my enemies&."
"Anyway, you're not going to stop me from escaping with the Map Cartridge, and since I can't have you tap into my teleportation path and it's impossible to teleport in or out of this place without using this Warp Capsule, I guess I'll have to kill you!"
Jon was about to disagree with him about the killing part, but the Robot Master quickly shot a Crash Bomb at him.
"Mega Man 2 Boss Theme"
Jon jumped out of the way and, realizing that Crash Man wasn't going to change his mind about killing him, shot at him using the A-Blast, but the robot blocked it by shooting a bomb at the laser. Crash Man then dashed through the explosion at swiped at the Game Master with one of his cone hands, but Jon dived to the side, falling over. Crash Man successfully managed to make a medium-sized cut along the nerd's side, however. Jones groaned, but he quickly fired a B-Blast into the Robot Master as he skidded to a stop, knocking him quite far away.
Jon reached into his pocket and ate one of his Mushrooms, turning the wound into a paper cut and magically fixing his shirt, but Crash Man suddenly shot four Crash Bombs at the Game Master, surrounding him. Jon quickly pressed the PAUSE button, got up and jumped away, and right as the bombs exploded, time froze. The Game Master moved the exploding bombs from the floor and positioned them around the robot's body. He then went behind Crash Man, unpaused, and right as the bombs hit, doing little damage due to it being his own attack, Jon fired a B-Blast, making a direct hit.
Crash Man was knocked away by the attack, but he turned around and fired a Crash Bomb at Jon, which the Game Master, like usual, jumped away from. However, as the Crash Bomb passed the nerd, it exploded in mid-air, knocking Jon into the wall and giving him some burns. The Robot Master then fired another bomb at the Jon, but when the Game Master pressed PAUSE, Crash Man made it explode before it could reach him. Time froze.
"&He must have figured out my strategy&," thought Jon as he ate another Mushroom and his burns healed. The Game Master then walked behind the robot, unpaused, and fired an A-Blast, but Crash Man expected this and shot a bomb at the laser, blocking it. He then jumped high into the air and started repeatedly firing his Crash Bombs at Jon, but he quickly pressed PAUSE and started running away until time froze. However, when time froze, Jon found that Crash Man was too far away to move the bombs to, and everything stayed still once Jon let go of them, so he couldn't throw them. The nerd unpaused under Crash Man and rapidly fired his A-Blast at him. The Robot Master shot Crash Bombs to block them all, but the explosions were so close that they were harming him, so he stopped the defensive.
On the ground, Crash Man tried to tackle Jon, but the Game Master ducked and the Robot Master went right over him. However, this was the plan, as, in mid-air, Crash Man fired his bombs along the nearby wall and the explosions caused rubble from the wall to fall to the ground. Jon pressed PAUSE and ran away, but a message popped up.
"You are out of Time Points."
"&Time Points! You mean my pause has ammo&!" Jon thought as some of the rubble fell on him, pinning him to the ground.
End "Mega Man 2 Boss Theme"
Crash Man was about to fire a Crash Bomb, but suddenly, a loud drilling sound was heard. The Robot Master stopped and looked up, trying to figure out what it was. Soon, dirt was falling from the ceiling and a hole formed with a drill popping out of it.
"What the hell?" said Crash Man as the drill went down further, revealing that it was red and someone was riding in it. A head poked out of it, along with an arm that shot a green fan-shaped capsule near the Robot Master. The green capsule exploded into a miniature tornado, which engulfed the robot, and after screaming for a while, he exploded in multiple energy balls.
The drill then transformed into a sort of flying red dog and the person who shot the tornado jumped down.
"Slower, More Heroic Version Of Mega Man 3 Title Screen Music, Starting From Where Music Picks up"
"Are you okay?" an indigo and blue-green figure who seemed around ten years old said his color switched to plain blue and he shot the rubble off the Game Master using a sort of plasma gun built into his arm.
"I'm fine. Say, aren't you Mega Man?"
"Please, just call me Rock" Mega Man said as he jumped off Rush and pressed a button on his armor. Suddenly, his armor was sucking into a small wristwatch, leaving him with a yellow t-shirt and blue jeans, making his young age even more obvious. Rock's eyes glowed as he jumped high into the air and absorbed the orbs from Crash Man's explosion, absorbing the Crash Bomb.
"That was the Tornado Hold you used to kill Crash Man, wasn't it?"
"Yeah, it was."
"How did you get here anyway?"
"I was in Hand Stadium, the place where the Super Smash Bros. Tournament is taking place, helping out, and I came to help when the castle was being attacked. King Game and Watch told me to come to this chamber. Anyway, let's get you out of here."
"Just a minute," Jon said as he picked up the "Map Cartridge" Crash Man tried to take and the Warp Capsule leading back to the hidden laboratory. He then got on Rush the transforming robo-dog, who was in his Rush Jet mode, and found that Rush was sending an electric current through him so that he would stay on.
The two went through the hole formed by the Rush Drill, which is a special attack from the Marvel vs. Capcom series, if you're wondering, and came to the surface.
"&Hey, we're pretty close to the castle&," Jon thought as he got off Rush. King Game and Watch, along with a bunch of soldiers, greeted them. The sky was clear of Wily's ships, implying that the invasion was over.
"It's nice to see you again, too, King Game and Watch."
"Wait," said Jon," you can understand him without a translator?"
"Yeah. I have a built in translator."
"Cool," Jon replied as he put on his translator. "I think you guys might want this," he said as he handed the Map Cartridge and Warp Capsule to the King/president. "Is there anything important about that NES cartridge?"
"We're not sure, we just hid it because the data was in a very rare format and it needed to be studied. However, if Dr. Wily used all of those robots to get this, then there must be something important about it. I'll have Pit (from Kid Icarus, former member of N-Team) hide this until we figure out what, though," replied the stick figure being.
"Why are you telling him all of this?" Rock asked.
"Oh, right, I forgot," King Game and Watch said as he introduced Jon to Rock.
"So you're the new Game Master? It's nice to meet you," the boy robot told Jon as he held out his hand.
"Uhh... Thanks," Jon said as he hesitantly shook the boy robot's hand.
-I
NEXT TIME ON CAPTAIN N: 2004!
"Instrumental Version Captain N 2004 Theme Song"
Just make up your own scenes that play while Jon says all of this.
"It seems that since I came to Nintendo, strange things have been going on. For my first mission, I'll be heading to the world of Popstar to solve a problem with Dark Matter and Metaknight. By the way, it seems that to make sure I don't screw up, Link has joined my pitiful little band. Stuff blows up, but who knows, there might be a scene where it doesn't.
"Be sure to watch/read Captain N Level 2: There's A Popstar, So What About Snapstar and Cracklestar? I Wonder What A Crackstar Would Be Like? Or the shorter title: Crackstar"
"Because Magic cards are not created equal."