October 13, 1988

17 days remaining

"A storm is coming, Frank says.

A storm that will swallow the children

And I will deliver them from the kingdom of pain.

I will deliver the children to their doorsteps.

I will send the monsters back to the underground.

I will send them back to a place where no one can see them...

Except for me.

Because I am Donnie Darko."

After he'd finished reading his poem, Donnie hunched his shoulders. Trotted quickly back to his desk, head down. Karen Pomeroy stared at him, frowning. "Who is Frank?" she asked abruptly.

"A six-foot-tall bunny rabbit."

The class burst into laughter. Donnie tilted his head towards Gretchen. Eyes half-closed. There was still Health class left to hurdle.

"It is time to breathe."

"Thank you, Jim Cunningham," said the fat woman with sacred admiration.

"Thank you, Jim Cunningham!" said the bed-wetter and his mom.

A beatific smile out of Hell filled the screen. "So now let us begin Life Line exercise number one. Please press 'STOP' now."

The class watched with empty eyes as Ms. Farmer wheeled a chalkboard to the front of the room. There was a diagram drawn on it.

FEAR---------------LOVE

"As you can see," Ms. Farmer said with mushy enthusiasm, "the Life Line is divided into two polar extremes: Fear and Love. Fear is in the negative energy spectrum, and Love is in the positive energy spectrum!"

"No duh," Sean muttered. He jumped as Ms. Farmer's beetle eyes loomed over him, her mouth puckering down into a little anus hole. "Excuse me? 'No duh' is a product of Fear!" she barked.

Sean looked blank as Ms. Farmer returned to the lesson. She held up a stack of cards with pictures and words on them. She passed them around. Devlin sneered and tossed his under a chair, but Ms. Farmer pretended to ignore it.

"Now, on each card is a character dilemma which applies to the Life Line. Please read each character dilemma aloud, and place an 'X' on the Life Line in the appropriate place. Cherita?"

Cherita Chen lumbered to the front and read awkwardly from her card. "'Juanita has an important math test today. She has known about the test for several weeks, but has not studied. In order to keep from failing her class, Juanita decides that she will cheat on the math test.'"

She picked up the chalk and scratched two lines on the board. Donnie examined the diagram. His chest prickled.

FEAR--X-----------LOVE

Ms. Farmer nodded her approval. "Very good. Mr. Darko?"

Slowly, Donnie got to his feet. His card showed a badly drawn cartoon character of unidentifiable gender and terrible fashion sense. He read the scenario quickly. "'Ling Ling finds a wallet on the ground filled with money. She takes the wallet to the address on the driver's license, but keeps the money inside the wallet.'"

The pressure in his chest increased. He turned to the teacher. "I'm sorry, Ms. Farmer. I don't get this."

Ms. Farmer blinked twice rapidly and cocked her head, like he'd just ordered a cheeseburger in Swahili. "Just place an 'X' on the Life Line in the appropriate place," she instructed.

"No, I mean..." He had their attention now. All of them. "I know what to do, I just don't get this. You can't just lump things into two categories. Things aren't that simple."

Kittie's brittle smile never wavered. "The Life Line is divided that way."

"But life isn't that simple. I mean, who cares if Ling Ling returns the wallet and keeps the money? It has nothing to do with either fear or love!" Donnie's voice rose perceptibly.

It was like chipping through a brick wall with a fountain pen. Ms. Farmer just stared at him, diminishing him. Her voice and face were blank. "Fear and Love are the deepest of human emotions," she told him smoothly, as if stating a fact. Donnie stepped back, but only an inch. He raised his hands. Trying to break through.

"Okay. But you're not listening to me. There are other things that need to be taken into account, like the whole spectrum of human emotion! You can't just lump everything into these two categories and then deny everything else!"

Particles in the air stood still. Ronald and Sean looked like their eyes were about to pop out of their heads. The students at the edge of their seats, eagerly anticipating the final blow. Ms. Farmer was stumped. Donnie's fingers were curled around the dilemma card, wrinkling it at the edge. The two faced each other down, until Ms. Farmer broke the staring contest.

"If you don't complete the assignment, you'll get a zero for the day," she told him primly, triumph in her eyes.

Donnie took a deep breath. Appeared to compose himself. Opened his mouth...

"Donald, let me preface this by saying that your Iowa test scores are... intimidating. So let's go over this again. What exactly did you say to Ms. Farmer?"

Rose glanced over at her son, who was slouched in his seat between her and Eddie. He was glowering at his shoes. The principal arranged papers on his desk, waited patiently for an explanation. So far it was unclear exactly what had transpired in Health class that afternoon.

Before anyone could answer, Kittie came out of her seat in the corner, apoplectic. "I'll tell you what he said!" she cried, almost in tears. "He asked me to forcibly insert the Life Line exercise card into my anus!"

Eddie went into a thinly disguised coughing fit. Rose felt her heart sink. Principal Cole and Kittie Farmer were looking at Donnie like he was from the Black Lagoon. Quietly, she asked to be excused. They filed out of the office, Kittie with her head thrust back at an eighty-five degree angle, Eddie with his arm around Donnie's shoulders. Her two men left the building, Eddie chortling audibly.

She went to confront Kittie Farmer, who was discussing politics with a friend. Rose asked for a private audience and the friend backed away, glancing back with a knowingly raised eyebrow. Here comes the Bad Parent. Kittie waited reluctantly, arms folded.

"They've suspended him from after school activities for the next six months," Rose said softly.

Kittie said nothing.

"Ever since this jet engine fiasco, I honestly don't know what's gotten into him…" She gestured helplessly. Kittie sighed as a guru would to an incompetent follower.

"Rose, I'll tell you this because our daughters have been on the dance team together for two years, and I respect you as a woman. But after witnessing your son's behaviour this afternoon, I have significant doubts about your-"

She must have seen the expression on Rose's face and backed off. "Our paths through life must be righteous!" she pleaded instead, wrinkled hands clasped to her non-existent bosom. "I urge you to go home and look in the mirror, and pray that your son doesn't succumb to the path of Fear!"

Donnie wandered into his new bedroom, feeling faintly sick and wanting to lie down. The weeks of construction following The Incident had given him a constant headache. Instead he found Elizabeth sitting on his bed, yakking into her cell phone. He stood by silently and listened to her.

"Wait. Do you remember that weird gym teacher, Ms. Farmer?" Elizabeth saw him and winked. "Yeah. Okay, well, my brother told her to shove a book up her ass today. And then my parents just bought him all this new shit."

Elizabeth got up, shooting him a pointed look before turning into the hallway.

"Yeah, I know. I wish a jet engine would fall in my room."