Bitterly Unrequited

Chapter 13 - She Will Be Spared

A/N: Here's a new chapter for you all as a Christmas present from me. Honestly, I'd REALLY appreciate reviews on this chapter, because I'm really just not sure of its quality, and I really love constructive criticism. Thanks and happy holidays!

"And Dumbledore trusts you now?"

"Completely, my Lord. The tip-off on Rosier and his father gained his trust – I suppose he thought if I could 'betray' my friend because he is a Death Eater, then I must truly be on his side."

"The old fool," Voldemort laughed haughtily. "He is unwilling to sacrifice others for the sake of his noble cause – it is one of his deepest weaknesses – so he cannot see how anyone else would. You have served me well, Severus, well indeed. I knew to expect great things from you, and you have proved me right. Return to Dumbledore, and find out the remaining members of their so-called 'order.' Does he still not allow you to meet with the other members?"

"No, my Lord. He says it will be safer for me if they do not know who I am, because there is less chance of you discovering my 'duality'," he laughed cruelly.

"Well, you can discover them without being present at the meetings, I trust. In particular, find out about the younger members – the ones your age or near it. They will be undoubtably easy to dispose of."

"Yes, my lord."

"So, Snape," drawled the blonde man lazily, "what ever happened with you and Evans?"

Severus looked up at Lucius, glaring darkly. "Where'd you hear about that, Malfoy?"

"Please, I have connections at Hogwarts," he grinned. "Did you ever...accomplish your goal with her?"

Snape shook his head bitterly. "Good," replied Malfoy darkly. "She's a Mudblood, Snape – she's below us."

"The little bitch," Severus muttered, knowing how petty he sounded.

Malfoy laughed. "There's the spirit," he jeered. "But you'll be graduating soon, won't you?"

"Yes, only five more months. But I've got to leave and get back there – Christmas break's over tomorrow."

Snape approached Dumbledore's office, his blank, emotionless mask once again coating his face. Playing the headmaster's lap-dog spy was undeniably annoying to him, but he unwillingly acknowledge that it was crucial for his master's plot.

He muttered the password to the office and was about to enter, until he heard voices from within. Intrigued, Severus silently snuck into the small antechamber that led into the office, listening to the conversation between the headmaster and the two students across from him – Lily Evans and the current speaker, Remus Lupin.

"Sir, do you really think it's wise, though, to trust Snape, of all people in the Order?"

Dumbledore sighed, looking sad and resigned. "No, Remus," he said heavily. "It isn't wise in the slightest. Severus seems...too indifferent, too cold, too careless with our cause to truly seem as though his allegiances are with us."

"But surely, Professor," Lily entreated imploringly, "surely you don't think that he is serving Voldemort?"

"He has served him in the past," he replied darkly, "I have seen his mark, and though I hate to assume the worst of the boy, I cannot believe that he has left him completely. For one, I highly doubt that Severus would be alive now, were he to truly serve the Order – Voldemort would have found out, it seems." He stared off sadly into space for a few moments, before continuing.

"That is why I have called the two of you here today. I need one or both of you to tail him, to discover all you can about his allegiances. Lily, I know that Severus looks up to you greatly and thinks of you affectionately. Perhaps if you..."

"No, Professor," she said firmly. "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't."

Dumbledore looked at her with his piercing blue eyes. "Very well, Miss Evans, I understand. Now, you, Remus: out of all the members of the Order that go to Hogwarts – most of which are Gryffindors, I might add – I just feel that Snape would trust you above any of the others, especially over James or Sirius. Remus, I know that it is far too much to ask – but will you consider it?"

The boy looked uncertain. "I...I don't know, Professor. Snape's never opened up to me – why should he? I'm the best friend of his two worst enemies...it just seems like...I'll try, Professor Dumbledore."

"Thank you, Remus," Dumbledore said, his eyes radiating gentle approval. "Now, if you two will excuse me..."

Snape did not stay to hear any more. So, his brilliant plan had failed miserably. Dumbledore didn't trust him in the slightest bit, which made him essentially useless in his position as spy. Of course, he thought bitterly, it makes sense now – why Dumbledore never allows me in their meetings, why none of the other members know I'm on their side...

His mind was spinning. He merely had to convince that bloody werewolf that he was on their side, and then everything would be as it should be.

The next few months were hell for Severus. Not only did he have to speak to Lupin on a regular basis, he also had to be relatively civil to him, which was torturously difficult for him. By the end of the year, however, Lupin was fairly convince of Snape's innocence and told Dumbledore so. The headmaster was still wary around him, but he did accept Severus as a member of the Order as he had not before.

It was nearly March of his seventh year before Snape was able to see his lord again. Called away on during a Hogsmeade weekend, Voldemort wished to check Severus' progress.

"Things...did not go as well as I had anticipated, my lord. Dumbledore was suspicious of me, and he sent one of the Order members to spy on me."

Voldemort was staring at him with a cold, unblinking gaze. "And did you fix it, Severus?"

"Yes, my lord," hastening Snape, shuddering at the look in those chilling green eyes. "I played the part convincingly enough to fool the spy. I was too careless before...I am much more cautious now."

The intensity of the eyes still bored into him. "Severus, do you remember what I told you when we first met?"

Snape was trembling at this side of his master he had never before seen. "You said that servants of Lord V...Voldemort do not get caught, my lord."

"Indeed," he replied. "You have, up till this point, been a most valuable servant to me, Snape. Do no fail me again, or suffer my...displeasure."

Snape nodded, unable to speak.

"You did, I hope, do my bidding from our last meeting? Who is involved with this Order of the Phoenix?"

Snape forced himself to regain his composure. "Outside of Hogwarts, there is Alastor Moody, Caradoc Dearborn, the McKinnons, and the Prewetts. At Hogwarts, a lot of the teachers, but especially McGonagall...in the students, there's Sirius Black, James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, Frank Longbottom, Remus Lupin, and..." He cut off.

"More?"

"N...no, my lord. Those are all I think of." Snape was trying to close his mind from the penetration of Legilimency, but the image of a beautiful girl with thick red hair kept flooding his mind...

"Do not lie to Lord Voldemort, Severus. Who is the redheaded girl?"

Severus closed his eyes. "Lily Evans," he rasped out unwillingly.

Voldemort was surveying him. "Serve me faithfully, Severus," he whispered. "Serve me well, and if you do well enough, she will be spared."

"Do you promise?" he found himself asking, not caring how dangerous a question it was.

"I swear. Serve me well, Snape, and the girl will be spared."