Well, hope you've been enjoying this fanfic, throughout its short chapters and initial lameness and occasional weirdness…

I've been busy with a bunch of other fanfics, but I completed two of them, so I should have more time to write and plan out this one now…Maybe there's such thing as being too productive…

Eeheehe

Well, let's start the show.

Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion or its characters. Gainax does, and they rock. Who else could create both Evangelion and FLCL!

Zankoku na tenshi no you ni
Shonen yo, shinwa ni nare...

Aoi kaze ga ima mune no doa wo tataitemo,
Watashi dake wo tada mitsumete
Hohoenderu Anata
Sotto Fureru mono
Motomeru koto ni muchuu de,
Unmei sae mada shiranai itaikena hitom

Dakedo itsuka kizuku deshou
Sono senaka ni wa
Haruka mirai mezasu tame no
Hane ga aru koto...

Zankoku na tenshi no te-ze
Madobe kara yagate tobitatsu
Hotobashiru atsui patosu de
Omoide wo uragiru nara
O-zora wo daite kagayaku
Shonen yo, shinwa ni nare

Zutto nemutteru watashi no ai no yurikago
Anata dake ga yume no shisha ni
Yobareru asa ga kuru
Hosoi kubisuji wo tsukiakari ga utsushiteru
Sekai-ju- no toki wo tomete
Tojikometai kedo...

Moshi mo futari aeta koto ni imi ga aru nara,
Watashi wa, sou, jiyu- wo shiru
Tame no Baiburu

Zankoku na tenshi no te-ze
Kanashimi ga soshite hajimaru
Dakishimeta inochi no katachi
Sono yume ni mezameta toki
Dare yori mo hikari wo hanatsu
Shonen yo, shinwa ni nare

Hito wa ai wo tsumugi nagara rekishi wo tsukuru
Megami nante narenai mama
Watashi wa ikiru...

Zankoku na tenshi no te-ze
Madobe kara yagate tobitatsu
Hotobashiru atsui patosu de
Omoide wo uragiru nara
O-zora wo daite kagayaku
Shonen yo, shinwa ni nare

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Episode 33

Brooding Apathy

Tokyo 3, Japan

Misato Katsuragi's Apartment

Misato Katsuragi groaned as she slowly rose, leaning against a chair as she viewed the face of the person that had helped her up.

"So, it really is you."

She seemed to accept it without any further shock, an odd quality attributed to those who had survived Second Impact, the damned, the survivors; they were never too surprised and never took anything for granted.

Ryouji Kaji smiled sheepishly at her, his basic expression, rubbing the stubble around his face.

"It's been a while."

"So…you survived…"

Asuka smiled, walking towards them.

"Of course Kaji survived, did you have any doubt?"

Asuka seemed fresh and new, ignoring the fact that she had almost been murdered, staring instead at Kaji with obvious appreciation.

Misato seemed more serious although her voice cracked with emotion at times.

"Why…did you return? They'll find you, won't they?"

Asuka seemed to grow angry at this, her own needs overwhelming any logic.

"What do you mean, dammit? Aren't you glad he's here! Of course he's returned, he's come to stay, right, Mr. Kaji?"

The two adults turned away, suddenly silent, feeling quite seriously annoyed and tired.

Tokyo 3, Japan

Shinji Ikari sighed as he strolled down the empty streets of Tokyo 3, his hands in his pocket, his mind in the dirt.

He peered around the gloomy emptiness, the urge to run from this city pervading every fiber of his body then easing down into grayness once more.

Why don't I? Why don't I just run away? What ties me to this place…what keeps me here...

"There is nothing that ties me to the misery here…There is no one to care for me, no one who cares for me…No one I can love…Love isn't there…it never will be…so why?"

He remembered Rei's soft voice.

"Why do you pilot, Ayanami?"

"Because it is my link."

"Link?"

"Yes, I am bonded to it."
"Linked to…my father?"

"To all people."

"You're brave…Ayanami…I could never…"

"I have nothing else."

No…He could not allow that…He realized now that he was bonded to his Evangelion, but he could not allow that to happen. He would rather run away than allow himself to stay because he had nothing else. There was nothing to lose, and nothing to gain. It was fine that way.

But he realized now that he had something, it was not the lack thereof that kept him there, like Ayanami, no, he remembered the deep misery that kept him here.

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Episode 33

The Pariah

Kaji's hands shook imperceptivity as he continued.

"But…I started to think about it this way…What in the hell were we all doing in that situation, anyway? It was because of the Second Impact. It was…something to go on, something to go on for. It was around that time that the U.N. published the official explanation for that event. A meteor had hit Antarctica they said. I didn't buy it. If there were people behind this, then they should be punished, or they would only make more victims…I thought I could atone for my brother…by uncovering the truth of what happened."

Kaji pulled out a cigarette and calmly lighted it.

"I was lucky, I eventually found relatives who took me back in. Got back in school, and they sent me to college. Learned a lot there…"

"To become a spy?"

"Hah…You could say that…It was then that I met Katsuragi…We fell in love right away. We were so happy. But…we were consumed by our happiness. That suddenly, one day, some fear stuck me down. I wondered…if I deserved this, when I killed my own brother."

"What!" Is that why you broke up?"

"I just couldn't spend my time being in love anymore…"

"I feel sorry for Misato…I think…she still loves you. She…She said that there are something you can't help, even if you're in love."

Kaji took a puff of his cigarette and looked intently at the floor.

"It's the same…with her, Shinji."

"What do you mean?"

"She's the sole survivor of the Katsuragi Expedition that was there when Second Impact happened. There was never any meteor. She's the only living soul who actually saw it up close. Her father was heading the investigation of the object called "Adam" that they had discovered…buried in Antarctica. And then, it happened. They were both wounded, with only one escape vessel. He put her in. She survived…he died."

Shinji's eyes widened once more as he heard Misato's past.

"It runs down her body you know…The scar, it runs deep inside. I know it's why she joined NERV, just like it's why I'm spying on it. Neither of us…deserve to be happy. And...Shinji…Neither do you."

Kaji stared Shinji intently in the eyes, Kaji's eyes now gaining a harder less casual look to them.

"What do you mean...I'm not the same as you…Are…you…You're talking about Toji! That wasn't my fault. Dad did it!"

Shinji roared with all his weak voice.

"Toji died because of dad!"

Kaji slowly held the cigarette in his fingers, the smoke billowing around.

"And you, Shinji. You just watched…You could've stopped it if you tried. If you had fought before they switched over to the dummy system you might have been able to defeat the angel, and save Suzuhara's life. But…you didn't. Suzuhara died…and you survived. Just like how I survived by trading my brother's life. And how Katsuragi survived by trading her father. You have it now. You have Suzuhara's life. You've still got flesh and blood, because you took his."

Shinji stared at Kaji, tears welling up in his eyes as his right fist clenched and unclenched

"So how are you going to live that life…as if nothing happened?"

"What…am I supposed to do!"

Kaji lifted his hand and pointed towards the exit of the bunker

"You can get to the Geofront on the Linear-Rail Route 18, through the door on the end. It's your choice whether you get on it or not. But it's like I've told you before…You musn't look away from the truth."

The tears slowly trickled down Shinji's face as Kaji looked even more dark and serious.

"They say…that there will be a Third Impact…if an angel makes contact with Adam, which is sleeping underneath NERV. This time, everyone could die. The only one that can stop it…the only thing, is the Evangelion. It has power…as an angel."

Tears trickled down Shinji's face as he realized the truth.

He no longer had the right to his own soul, to his own body; it belonged to the rest of the world, to the dead, to the damned, to everyone who deserved to live. For he did not deserve to the chance to live, because he could not love himself. That was his truth.

No…he was no longer without guilt, realistically, he knew it. It was no longer some game of self-guilt. He owed it to the souls of the dead; he owed it to those around him. He would stay, and suffer dearly for it, God willing.

And then he heard it. That familiar noise, the siren, bearing him back into the comfort of misery.

Tokyo 3, Japan

NERV Headquarters, Control Room

A recorded voice echoed in the control room, subdued and apparently feminine.

"Foreign entities invading perimeter."

The technicians rushed about the control room, apparently neither the Commander, Sub-Commander, or Major were present at the time.

Maya rushed about, having been recently told to fill the spot of her missing mentor, Ritsuko Akagi.

"What's the current situation?"

"Unknown…there's some sort of craft on the borders of our tracker…Just floating there."

"Switch to emergency blue communications and satellite!"

Maya gasped, typing rapidly on her console.

"No! Unknown entity trying to jam our communications in that sector!"

"Could their target be the MAGI?"

"Data is being input from outside networks…This is an attempt to invade the MAGI system!"

"Just as I thought…Is it a local invasion? How many sources?"

"One…two…three…four…five…It's still going, this is a mass invasion…I don't know-"

Suddenly a calm, clear voice interrupted the chaos as Commander Gendo Ikari entered the chambers.

"I…shall send for Dr. Akagi."

Tokyo 3, Japan

Misato Katsuragi's Apartment

The awkward silence that fell upon the Second Child, Kaji, and Misato was thankfully broken by a familiar, but horrific sound, the sound of the angel siren.

The silence had been brooding and uncomfortable, so a sense of familiarity in this old danger seemed to strengthen all three of them, as they rose to action.

"Was that?"

"It can't be…"

"Well, we have to get to headquarters immediately…"

The two females both simultaneously stared at Kaji, both with different, odd expressions, and he nodded, smiling.

"Right, right, I'll be somewhere…I'll be back when you guys come back, don't worry…I've got something to…research."

Misato seemed to simply nod at that, oddly emotionless, and strolled out to her car, Asuka alongside her.

Tokyo 3, Japan

NERV Headquarters, Detention Facility

Ritsuko Akagi lay on the cold, unforgiving stone floor of her cell, her face almost twisting into an ironic smirk as she saw a pair of NERV guards approach her cell.

"Commander Ikari requires you."

And with that, the bars were released, and Doctor Ritsuko Akagi rose with a groan, peering at her captors.

"I understand…It's for the MAGI's defense system, isn't it? I thought something like this would happen…"

One of the guards nodded and spoke before simply leaving Ritsuko alone in her open cell.

"Yes, speak to First Lieutenant Maya Ibuki at the Control Room for more details required for your operation."

Ritsuko sighed, nodding to herself as she took a shaky step outside of her cell.

Human relationships are so illogical…But I suppose where there is a need, even a dumped woman can be made usable…What a logical man that bastard Ikari is…and what a fool I am…Can that really be possible? That I have succumbed to weakness, mother? That I have been so blind?

Fly me to the moon,
And let me play among the stars.
Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter and Mars.
In other words, hold my hand!
In other words, darling, kiss me.

Fill my heart with song,
And let me sing forever more.
You are all I long for, all I worship and adore.
In other words, please be true!
In other words, I love you!

Fly me to the moon,
And let me play among the stars.
Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter and Mars.
In other words, hold my hand!
In other words, darling, kiss me.

Fill my heart with song,
And let me sing forever more.
You are all I long for, all I worship and adore.
In other words, please be true!
In other words, I love you!

Well, hope you enjoyed Chapter Ten…And yeah, these episodes may be a bit short, but this fanfic is designed that way, things will get longer and more exciting as we reach the inevitable doom of the End of Evangelion timeline…eheheh.

Well, see you next chapter.