Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I owned Naruto, he'd be dead, and Lee would become the main. Muahahahaha! I do, however own Hyuun, Hari, and Jimmy.
"Sorry, Naruto' s dead. We killed him." Shikamaru explained simply. Hyuun and Hari just stared at him blankly. Then Hari spoke up;
"Shut-up. "
Kiba narrowed his eyes, ''What? Is that all you can say?" he asked. Hari, in response, raised a clenched fist at him, also narrowing her eyes, but looking far more threatening.
''Yeah, I can also say, 'I'm gonna kill you' would you like that better?" she snarled.
"N-no! 'Shut-up' is good... it' sgreat!" Kiba responded sheepishly. When Hari let her fist down and smiled a bit, Kiba let out a breath.
Then Hari turned to Hyuun, who was gawking at Rock Lee, who was posing. Then she covered her mouth with her hand then spoke, ''He's as frightened as a deer."
''What a bothersome girl. " Shikamaru sighed. Then he shook his head, then faced the two kunoichi. ''Well, that's beside the point, why would you want to kill Naruto anyway? He's just the village idiot, well, I mean, sure, he's accomplished a bunch of stuff and taken all the credit for it, but that still gives no reason for anyone to want to assassinate him."
Hari shrugged, "Well, you guys apparently assassinated him. It seems you're a lot dumber than you look." Shikamaru opened his mouth to protest, but Hari covered his mouth with her hand.
"Don't try to talk back to me. You'll never win, for I never lose."
Shikamaru stared at her dumbfounded as the Kiba ran toward him, TenTen, Neji and Lee. No one had ever talked to Shikamaru like he was inferior he has an IQ of over two-hundred! How could this girl, who looked no older than him, speak to him in such a way?
"Hey! Hey, Shikamaru are those two the weird people Lee was talking about?" Kiba called. He had Jimmy on his shoulders, and she had her arms folded, most likely pouting because no one would listen to her. When he skidded to a stop next to Shikamaru, Kiba studied Hyuun and Hari suspiciously, ''Hey, they don't look weirder than Lee!"
Shikamaru narrowed his eyes at his companion, then sighed, "Kiba, would you do us all a favor and shut up!" Kiba stuck out his tongue in response, but said nothing more.
The two kunoichi before them were just staring at them, Hyuun studying Kiba, trying to see if he was up to her standards on cuteness, and Hari picking her latest victim to pulverize.
"I've decided. I'm going to beat up him to pay for not having Naruto for us." Hari said bluntly, pointing at Kiba
"Why me!" he asked angrily, clenching his fists. "Do you even know who I am! I'm Inuzuka Kiba, of the Inuzuka clan obviously, and I could kick your butt so high you'd kiss the moon!"
Unfeeling of his words, Hari retorted, "I'm an elite level jonin of the Village Hidden in Sand, and you are a genin of the Village Hidden in Leaves. There is no challenge." Kiba blinked, amazed by Hari's calm way of putting things that were far from calm.
Hyuun, who had been silent the whole time, giggled. She tugged at her ripped kimono's sleeve, blushing. ''Yeah... he's real cute... " she mumbled, staring longingly at Lee, who was still studying the waterfall.
"Is that all you think about!" Hari snapped, throwing a shuriken at her old friend. Hyuun ducked instinctively, but said nothing, still staring at Lee.
Lee turned away from the waterfall and addressed Hyuun, "I am sorry, but I am in love with another woman. Haruno Sakura, to be exact. But she does not like me, however... she does not seem to like my hair... "
Hyuun's eyes seemed to flash. Through clenched teeth she hissed, "Oh, is that so?"
"Hey, wait a second guys!" TenTen said abruptly. She looked around the clearing before the village gates, finding nothing she continued, ''Where'd everyone else go?"
''Yeah, good question." Neji said, looking around too. "I'll just use my Byakugan and find them." He began making the signs necessary for the Hyuga clan justsu, but was stopped short by a terrified scream.
The group of ninjas near the gates turned around swiftly to see the others running toward them frantically. ''You guys! You guys! Jiraiya is chasing Gaara again! He's threatening to use some jutsu! We need to get out of here!" Chouji called, running as fast as he could- which wasn't very fast by the way- and headed straight to Shikamaru. ''Who the heck are those two?" he asked, staring at Hyuun and Hari suspiciously.
"Just more trouble," Shikamaru muttered. "But anyway, I guess we'll have to shelter Gaara... not that he needs it, but... "
'''But' what?"
"Maybe Temari will want us to protect him!" Shikamaru finished cheerfully, Chouji just shook his head. "And besides, I think he'd kill us if we didn't." Shikamaru added quickly, grinning sheepishly.
''Whatever you say, Shikamaru." Chouji sighed.
"Darn it! Why do we have to take that little brat along anyway!" Kankuro yelled, sprinting alongside Temari and Gaara.
Temari slapped him on the head sharply. ''He's your brother, moron! Why wouldn't you take care of him?" she scolded. But Kankuro just rolled his eyes.
"Oh, I dunno, maybe because he's possessed by a demon maybe!" Kankuro yelled at his sister.
"And maybe if he weren't such a sweet little cuddle-bunny we'd get along better!" he added sarcastically.
Gaara just shrugged, "Or maybe it's because I'd kill you two if you ditched me."
Both Temari and Kankuro were silent. Then Kankuro said quietly, "Kid's got a point, y'know."
Behind them, Hinata, Shino, Sakura, Sasuke, and Ino came sprinting toward the village gates, reasonably terrified. For some reason Jiraiya had set his sole purpose in life at getting back at Gaara for some reason, none of them knew, not even Gaara. But ever since Jiraiya got a good look at Gaara, he'd started chasing him and anyone who helped him, and everyone helped him, so Jiraiya was angry at them all.
All of the others skidded to a stop, staring at Hyuun and Hari suspiciously, but said nothing about them.
''Hurry up! We need to lose Jiraiya or distract him somehow! I'd use a genjutsu, but he's too advanced to fall for one of my jutsus. So we'll need to think of something else." Sakura shouted, pointing back toward where they'd came from.
"Maybe the 'oh-so-great' Uchiha clan kid over there could help you dorks out." Hari suggested, arms crossed. Everyone stared at her for a minute, surprised that she would refer to Sasuke in such a rude way. But by the looks of it, she wasn't very nice.
Sasuke stared at her, ''How did you know my name?" he asked.
Hari rolled her icy blue eyes, "Oh, the 'original' question. It's obvious. You look just like Itachi." Sasuke stared at her, hatefully this time. Then he snarled,
"How do you know my brother?"
"Hmm... I dunno, somewhere, someplace, he taught me a very handy jutsu also." Hari replied, rubbing her chin. "Uh... I think it had something to do with rocks... or maybe snakes... "
''He taught you one of his jutsus and you forget it?" Sasuke screamed angrily. "Anyway, who the heck are you? And what type of person makes friends with my brother?"
Hari stared at him icily. "I am an elite level jonin from the Village Hidden in the Sand, far more capable of understanding things than you. Thus, there is no need to explain exactly who I am, or how I met your brother, or knew anything else about you... Sasuke."
Shocked, Sasuke remained silent.
"I-I'm sorry, but if you two are elite jonin, then c-could you h-help us?" Hinata whispered from behind Shino. "I mean, if it's not too much trouble... If you two are busy, then we can cope, I guess. B-but if it were possible to help us... w-would you?"
Hari studied her for a moment, and so did Hyuun.
"No." Hari replied.
"Yes!" Hyuun replied.
''WHAT!''
Hari glared at her partner angrily, "What have they done for us? What have they to give us? I expect fair payment for my services. And besides, they're just snot-nosed brats, what would possess you to help them? We don't even know them, for god's sake!"
"No! That's not true! They deserve our help, they seem so desperate. Maybe, these people aren't so bad. Even if it means I'll have to fight without you, I'm going to help them, no matter what." Hyuun protested, securing her headband a little tighter, preparing for battle.
Hari sighed, rolling her eyes. "Oh, alright, if it makes you all fuzzy inside. I'll help out too, besides, I've heard of this Jiraiya person, I want to see if he is as strong as I've heard he is."
"So that means you're helping us?" Ino asked hopefully.
"Yeah." Hari and Hyuun smiled.
"Yes!" Kiba rejoiced, patting Akamaru, who barked happily.
"Hah! Like they could stand a chance against me!"
Everyone turned around to see Jiraiya standing before them. Kiba gasped, and Akamaru retreated to Kiba's jacket. Even Jimmy, who had been silent the whole time, opened her mouth in what looked like shock. Jimmy jumped down ftom Kiba's shoulders, landing on the ground with a soft thud.
"Humph, I don't care if you're one of the legendary Sanin! You're just an old dude, anyway. I'll beat a withered old chump like you any day!" Jimmy taunted, resting her hands on her hips. After a moment's silence, Jimmy grinned, then adjusted her puppy-eared hat, then held up her fists, "Okay, gramps, bring it!"
Jiraiya snickered. "Oh, really, you little fool? You dare challenge me, the legendary Sanin Jirai-"
"Shut-up. I think your new name should be Baka-chan." Hari interrupted him, walking coolly towards him.
Hyuun stared at her, then stammered quickly, "I-isn't that a little rude? I mean, you just met him. I think Baka-sempai is much more suitable!"
"YOU DARE CALL THE LEGENDARY SANIN, JIRAIYA, BAKA! Foolish girls, you will soon face my wrath!" Jiraiya shouted, running at Hari and Hyuun.
Hari and Hyuun just stopped walking, grinning at each other.
"Shall we use that jutsu?"
"Lets shall."
Hyuun began making signs to do a jutsu, while Hari unfastened a needle from her belt. "Art of the Bubble Prison!" Hyuun shouted, then took a deep breath, then let it go in a scream, "Bubble Prison Jutsu!"
A flurry of bubbles spewed from Hyuun's open mouth, surrounding Jiraiya. One pushed itself onto him, capturing him in it. "H-hey! Wait a minute! What sort of trick is this! Some sort of genjutsu?"
Hyuun shook her head, then giggled, ''Nope, just a simple ninjutsu! Nin, nin!" She waved at him gleefully.
Hari threw her needle she had been holding at Jiraiya and the bubble, which was now at least twenty feet above ground. "Bye-bye." Hari snickered. The bubble popped, and Jiraiya fell to the ground, causing dust to fly into the air.
In shock, Shikamaru stared at the two girls, who had before seemed weak and useless. Maybe girls weren't so bad... "Amazing..." he whispered.
"And now for the finale!" Hyuun and Hari shouted simultaneously. Hyuun began signing again, while Hari stepped back a bit.
"Polar Opposite Jutsu!" Hyuun shouted, sending a strange pink aura flying at Jiraiya, who was just getting up. But, much to everyone's surprise, Jiraiya, in a counterattack, shouted his own jutsu,
"Reflecting Mirror Jutsu!"
A mirror appeared before Jiraiya, which reflected the pink aura... And sent it flying at Shikamaru, Gaara, Neji, Sasuke, Lee, and Shino! "Ah ha ha ha ha har! You thought you could outsmart me, did you! Well, now you're in for a taste of your own medicine!" Jiraiya laughed, retreating to the bushes.
"I've been wrong before." Shikamaru sighed, covering his eyes, as the pink aura surrounded him.