OKAY! I lied.. Yes... I know... It's a horrible thing to say. -grovels at your feet- I'm sorry!! I got up early - and I couldn't stop thinking about how much of a HORRIBLE cliff hanger that was. I hate it when stories end like that, and I can only imagine that you do too. I hate it when there isn't any closure - Tracey you know what I'm blabbering about!!!

I SWEAR after this there won't be an update or about a week!! CROSS MY HEART, HOPE TO DIE!

"He'll be fine, Mrs. Potter – but we would like to keep him overnight."

Mrs. Potter's grim face nodded as her solemn face slowly disappeared into the fire.

James had been sent to the hospital wing with a concussion and a few broken ribs. He had been under close observation since Sirius had brought him there. Sirius sat at his side in the hospital – his head hanging in his hands.

James woke with a start. His world was fuzzy. "Where am I?"

Sirius looked up at him with puffy eyes. "You're in the hospital wing, James... relax. I'm here." Sirius offered him a smile.

"Why... why am I here...?" James tried to sit up but winced when he felt pain pulse through his body. He lay back down and closed his eyes.

"Re-" Sirius took in a sharp breath and looked down at his fingers. His eyes began to blur again. His eyebrows curled in pain. "Remus did something... I don't know how – but be sent you flying and you hit a brick wall." Sirius let his head rest in his hands. His voice was low and full of pain and regret. Sirius sniffed back what tears he could.

"Remus? Wha..." James stopped and looked at his friend. They had known eachother for 7 years, and in all those years – he never looked as defeated as he did at that moment. "Sirius... what's wrong...?"

Sirius didn't answer, but began to cry again. He let the tears flow – he didn't care anymore. James moved his hand and placed it on his knee. He lightly stroked his knee with his thumb – the most movement that he could muster.

"I... Rem... We broke up..." He sniffed and wiped at his eyes. Sirius looked up and at the ceiling before looking down again. "He saw me with Madeline..."

"Why is your shirt bloody then? He didn't-"

"Claws... or something... he dug them into my back."

"Why don't you get it looked at?"

"Because now it's the only... the only thing I have to... remember him by." Sirius sat back and crossed his arms. His hair fell over his eyes. "It's pathetic, I know... but... Oh God..." Sirius sighed heavily. "God I would give anything to have him back..."

"Sirius..."

"I... I have to go." He took James' hand in his, and gently placed it back on his bed. "I'll be back soon, alright?" Sirius quickly turned around.

"Wait!"

He turned to face James – his eyes were wide and his hand was stretched out. "Yeah?"

"Don't... don't hurt yourself... please. I couldn't stand it if you did." He felt tears welling in his eyes.

Sirius smiled softly. "I won't. I'll always be here for you – as much as it pains me to say... I'll be here forever to bug you."

James laughed softly. "Good. I wouldn't have it any other way. Please... be careful."

Sirius smiled and nodded. "You go to sleep. I'll see you soon."

"Yeah, alright."

Sirius turned to walk down the corridor and from the corner of his eye he saw a splash of sandy-blonde hair. He stopped and turned in that direction. Remus sat in one of the hospital beds, his knees to his chest, his head bowed down – resting his forehead on his hands. Remus felt that Sirius was standing not 5 feet from him. He lifted his head and timidly looked up.

Their eyes locked and something flashed in Remus' eyes. Sirius was taken aback by the amount of emotion that showed on his face. Sirius moved towards Remus slightly and felt what seemed to be a warm breeze. He closed his eyes briefly to bask in the warmth, and when he opened his eyes... Remus was gone. Sirius sighed and turned to walk down the corridor and leave the hospital.

Remus sat in the same place he had been for the past few hours. He kept seeing flashing pictures of Madeline and Sirius on the couch. He stared blankly at the ground, letting time slip by un-noticed, idly hoping that this was all a dream and that he would wake up any minute. He didn't look up when the door opened.

Dumbledore stood at the doorway, squinting to see through the darkness. He then noticed a small figure sitting very closed up at the foot of the bed facing away from the door. He walked towards Remus slowly.

"Go away."

"I'm afraid dear boy, that I cannot oblige."

Remus slowly blinked his eyes. "Please go away."

Dumbledore knelt down and placed his hand to Remus' shoulder. He gasped when he felt the temperature rise from Remus' skin. "Remus..."

Remus turned to face him. He blinked away tears. "Please... please just go away."

Dumbledore smiled kindly and wrapped his long fingers around Remus' upper arm. He pulled him onto his feet. "No."

Remus stood still and remembered when Sirius had said the same thing. He yanked his arm out of Dumbledore's grip and backed away slowly. Tears found his grief stricken eyes. Dumbledore merely walked forward and took Remus in his arms. He pat the boy's back quietly and smiled when Remus relaxed in his arms.

Remus grabbed onto the front of Dumbledore's soft, intricate robes. "He went to someone else..."

"I know, I know."

"Was I not good enough for him?" Remus peered up into gentle blue eyes. His chest constricted with pain as he took in a breath.

"I highly doubt that that was the case, Remus."

"Then... then why did he... with her...?" He felt warmness radiate off of Dumbledore and fell into his arms again.

"That I cannot answer Remus. You will have to answer that for yourself." He ran his hands along Remus' back, comforting him.

"I... is the bond broken?"

"Does it feel broken?"

Remus' heart lifted for a moment. He thought he heard Sirius' laugh echo through his mind. "I don't know."

Dumbledore held the boy at arms length and bent down slightly to look into his eyes. "Dear boy, the love you hold for him still is strong. I can feel it radiating off of you."

"I don't want to love him anymore..." Remus shook his head and started to cry again – his breath hitching in his throat. "It hurts to much to love him."

Dumbledore felt a whoosh of warm air come towards him. "Go to him."

"I... I can't. I won't."

"You must, Remus."

"No. I won't... I can't look at him."

"Remus listen to me. You must go to him. If you do not – I fear what may happen to both of you." Dumbledore looked at Remus over his half moon glasses.

"I-"

At that moment, Sirius came through the door. Remus' heart skipped a beat when he saw Sirius' face. He then remembered what had happened – and his heart felt as if it sank to his feet. Dumbledore turned and nodded at Sirius, slowly passing by the door.

'Do not hurt him anymore. He does not deserve to hurt.'

Sirius felt words echo through his mind as Dumbledore passed. Sirius nodded in acknowledgement. Sirius turned to look at Remus. His heart broke at the sight. His beautiful porcelain skin was blotchy, his hair messy. His amber eyes looked dull and lifeless. His hands fell limp at his sides. Sirius wanted so badly to run to him, hold his body in his arms, and tell him everything was all right – but he knew he couldn't.

"Hi..."

"Hi." Remus ran a hand through his hair and looked to the ground. He twined his fingers together at his waist. He vaguely noticed the dull pain throbbing in his palms. The cuts he had left earlier were deep.

Sirius shut the door quietly and stood just a foot from the door. "I..."

Remus looked up at him with sad eyes. His hair fell limply around his face. "Yes?"

"I'm... I'm sorry."

Remus nodded slowly and jerked his head to the side. He sat down on the bed closest to him. When he had realized it was Sirius', he abruptly stood.

"Will you... can I explain?"

"There isn't much else to do, is there?" His voice was mocking and cruel.

Sirius decided that he didn't deserve to hear Remus' voice in any other way. So he continued. "I only did it because I was confused."

"About what." Remus spoke. It wasn't exactly question; it seemed more like a statement.

"About my sexuality... I didn't know if-"

"If you were really gay? Shouldn't being with me have been enough to... to what... to convince you?" Remus stepped forward slightly. He took a deep breath and willed himself to calm down.

"It should have been." Sirius stepped forward slightly, then stepped back again – feeling the pressure around him surround his body. The same pressure he felt at lunch when he and James' had fought. That's what it was – it was Remus. "I just... I didn't know. I had to reassure myself."

"You shouldn't have to reassure yourself." Remus spoke softly and sat down on the bed. He was now almost grateful when he touched the bed. He so wanted to run into Sirius' arms and touch him. "You shouldn't have to reassure yourself."

"I know... I just... I.... God Remus... I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say."

"Why, of all people - did you pick her?"

"Because she was there."

Remus looked up at him and slightly narrowed his eyes. "Because she was there...?"

"Yes." Sirius ran his hands through his hair. "I only did it because she was the only female left when you all went shopping. I didn't pick her because I felt something for her... I picked her because she was a skirt."

"That's a horrible thing to say about someone."

"Well I'm not going to lie to you – it was the truth." He took a step forward – ignoring the growing pressure around him. 'You aren't going to keep me away from you. I won't let you...'.

"Why didn't you just tell me that you were unsure of your sexuality?"

"Because I though you would take it badly."

"Well you obviously thought wrong. That you didn't tell me that and you deciding to chase the first skirt you could instead... That is what hurts." Remus looked down into his hands and traced the scar beside his thumb on his palm – the same one that Sirius had stroked the first time they had kissed. He smiled silently at the memory before looking up again.

Sirius stepped closer to Remus – now only 5 feet away. The pressure on him was growing – but he threw it aside. "Remus... I'm sorry for what I've done. I'm sorry for being an inconsiderate asshole."

Remus' eyes went wide as Sirius knelt down beside him. 'How is he... How did he get this far...?' Remus shifted slightly as Sirius reached out and took his hand. His thumb roamed absent-mindedly over the scar. Remus felt warmth fill his body. He looked down into tearful azure eyes.

Sirius spoke softly, but certainly. "You're everything to me. I need you to keep on going. I need to feel you beside me to be happy." Sirius looked down at Remus' hand. "I can't change the past... I can't change what I've done, and I know that." He looked up again into brilliant amber eyes. He was glad that Remus hadn't yanked his hand back. "I've torn myself apart a thousand times, I've cried more now than I ever have in my life. I didn't think I was capable of loving someone as much as I still love you. Remus... the reason I was born was so that I could love you – I'm sure of it."

Remus looked deep into his eyes. He knew Sirius was telling the truth. He flinched slightly as more tears fell down his cheeks. "I... I don't... I don't know if I can trust you."

"I'm not asking for your trust. I'm asking simply for your forgiveness - I can't live knowing you hate me." Sirius whispered slowly as he looked down at their joined hands.

"I don't hate you." Remus spoke softly and twitched his hand in Sirius' grip. He let his other hand travel slowly and timidly to Sirius' cheek, bringing up his face to look at him. "I don't hate you." Sirius' eyes were filled with tears. Remus couldn't hold his face so straight, and smiled softly and genuinely.

Remus slid off the bed and kneeled infront of Sirius. Remus took Sirius' hands in his, and held them close to his chest. "I know that I shouldn't... But... I do forgive you." Sirius looked up. He didn't smile, he didn't move. He simply stared into Remus' eyes. "I can't just stop loving you, and I can't just forget what you've done," He bowed his head slightly, resting it on Sirius' forehead. "But... I..." He broke out into tears again. "I can't live without you." His tears fell onto their joined hands.

"Remy..." Sirius slowly moved to wrap his arms around Remus' shoulders. When he felt no resistance – he held him close and tight to his chest. "I don't want you to hurt anymore."

Remus' will broke and he let out a long breath as he cried. He knew that he shouldn't forgive Sirius. He knew that he shouldn't even rightfully be talking to him. But a part of him wanted this closeness. That part of him needed the closeness. Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius' neck and smiled into his hair. "Damn you, Sirius Black... Damn you to hell."

Sirius smiled slightly and ran his hand through Remus' hair. He had only been away from Remus for a little over 6 hours – but he felt as if he hadn't seen him for a lifetime. He breathed deeply and basked in the now apparent warmth surrounding the two of them. He felt Remus' heart beating slowly against his chest. He heard Remus' slow; steady breaths flow in and out of his thin body. Sirius buried his head in the crook of Remus' neck and took in his scent. He loved this boy with everything he was and everything he never would be.

Remus pulled back and let his hands find Sirius' shirt collar. He ran his fingers underneath it and found the place he had dug his nails into. Sirius felt warmth fill that place – and unmistakably felt the skin mend until all that was left, were 4 small scars. Remus then smiled and ran his hands along Sirius' neck gently. Sirius felt the same warmness and the bruises on his neck slowly disappeared.

"How did you do that?"

Remus smiled. "I don't know. All that I know is that I can." He placed his hand to Sirius' cheek. He looked into his eyes. "Don't you ever touch another woman again like that, or I'll have your hide." His tone was serious, as was his face.

Sirius nodded and rested his hand on Remus'. "I won't ever touch anyone like that again – unless it's you."

Remus smiled and lent forward. When their lips touched –both boys felt their worlds fill with happiness again. He kissed Sirius very gently and let his other hand grab his other cheek. He ended the kiss and stood up, bringing Sirius with him. Sirius heard the door lock behind him as Remus pulled him onto Sirius' bed. Remus' heart felt as if it was to explode when he felt Sirius' familiar weight on top of him. He ran his fingers through Sirius' long, silky hair and smiled in spite of himself.

"What?"

"Just you... I can't stay mad at you." He kissed his neck and smiled. "I don't think I have it in me."

Sirius recognized the words and smiled slightly, leaning down to kiss Remus again.

Sirius woke the next morning, with Remus' naked back against his stomach. He smiled and pulled Remus closer to himself. He molded his body against Remus' and kissed the back of his neck. He then slowly drifted off to sleep again when he felt Remus' body shift back into his, letting their naked flesh touch completely from top to bottom. Remus tightened his grip on Sirius' hand and smiled into the pillow as he fell asleep.