Taking a deep breath, Remus dipped his quill into the thick black ink pooled in the small glass jar infront of him. He looked down at the parchment infront of him and began to write.

All the while, Remus didn't really know why he was writing this letter. He was deeply confused about his still lingering feelings for Sirius, but when he had kissed Sirius beside the tree he knew something had not changed. Something through everything that had happened had remained constant. Remus vaguely convinced himself that it was only the bond that remained constant as he listened to the scratching of his quill against the parchment. Everything he had been thinking was poured into this single letter. Remus smiled slightly as he scratched his former lover's name, putting the greatest of care into the curve of the S's in his name.

Remus stopped briefly to look around the quiet library, and dipped his quill back into the ink, preparing to write more. His sandy-blonde hair fell over his eyes, shading him from the world around him. He heard nothing but the words running from his mind, through his body and out the tip of the quill, scratched ever so gently into the parchment.

"Remus?"

He glanced up to see a woman standing infront of him with long, waving red hair. "Yes?"

"Why did you do that to James?" Lily spoke softly, as she twirled the ring on her finger.

"I... I..." Remus fumbled to find the words to explain why he had done it, and when none came to him, he answered simply. "I don't know."

Lily nodded slightly and crinkled her nose as she furrowed her eyebrows. "You can't just not know Remus."

"It's the truth Lily. I suppose I did it because he came in at the wrong time and I didn't want to be interrupted." Remus watched as Lily sat down across from him, lightly folding his her hands together.

"I was so scared when I saw him laying there..." She sniffed softly.

Remus smiled timidly. "He's alright now though."

"I know... but God Remus... it frightened me so much to see him laying motionless on the ground... I thought he was dead."

"I'm sorry Lily..." Remus paused and pulled a book over the letter to his side. He reached for her hands and held them in his. "I'm so sorry."

Lily raised her eyebrows slightly and looked away from Remus's eyes. Her voice was low and soft as she looked back at Remus. Her green eyes flashed suddenly as she spoke. "I heard about what Sirius did to you."

Remus took in a sharp breath and sucked his bottom lip in nodding his head. "I see."

Lily brought Remus' hands to her lips, and kissed his knuckles gently. "No matter who the person is, no matter what they may, or may not have done... you never betray true love the way he has." Lily smiled as a few tears fell down her cheeks. Locking her eyes with Remus, she spoke quietly. "No one ever deserves the pain you feel right now."

Remus opened his mouth slightly to take in a breath; he nodded slowly and felt tears fall down his cheeks. His eyes fluttered as they closed, never really staying shut - never really staying open. His eyebrows furrowed as he bit his lip, trying to stop the tears. Lily stood up quickly and walked over to Remus. Sitting in the chair next to him, she lightly brushed the hair away from his eyes.

Lily wrapped an arm around his shoulder, and lent her head against Remus'. She spoke softly into his ear, her breath warming his chilled skin. "I love you, Remy. I love you so much, and it hurts me so deeply to see you in such undeserved pain." She smiled warmly as Remus turned to face her. She cupped his cheek in her hand and rubbed away a tear with her thumb. She lent forward and placed a gentle kiss to his forehead before taking him in her arms.

Remus wrapped his arms around her body and held her close. Times like these, Remus felt so completely surrounded with love. With every caress, and smile he received from his friends, the more he treasured his life. Remus still didn't understand why his friends stayed beside him, nor why they even cared for him. Was it because they loved him? Pitied him? Or did they do it simply because they felt they were doing the world justice to be friends with a werewolf? It didn't matter now, all that mattered was the fact that Lily was holding him and comforting him in his time of complete need.

"I hate it when you cry." She whispered into his ear, softly stroking his hair. "I hate Sirius because of what he's done."

Remus lent back and looked into her eyes. "You can't hate him."

"...Why?"

Remus felt his heart clench tightly in his chest as he whispered out the next few words with great difficulty. "Because... because I still love him." He looked down and cursed. "God help me I still love him even after what he's done..."

That is what had remained constant - his love for Sirius had never swayed.

Sirius stumbled up the stairs towards the dorm, he was nearly asleep as he walked towards his bed, but something caught his eye. A small envelope sat on his night table, his name scrawled across the front of it. He recognized it as Remus' writing.

He furrowed his eyebrows and glanced over at Remus, his sleeping form took in an even breath. Sirius sat down quietly and looked around the dorm. One empty bed - James was still in the hospital. Sighing slightly Sirius opened the envelope, squinting to read the small, delicate writing enclosed.

He positioned himself so that the moonlight was shining on the yellowish paper igniting the words it contained.

'Sirius,

When you found that I was a werewolf, did it scare you? Did you assume to think that our relationship would ever come this far? Surely being mere friends with a werewolf must have scared you to some extent, as it still scares me to be one.

The years have come and gone... and we have grown into young adults. You've always been my backbone - even when you didn't realize it. There has been too many times in which I have relied on you solely for support, love or friendship, and strength. Each time I felt myself weaken, you would always be there to offer me a smile and help me to my feet... until now, when I need it the most.

When I realized that I had fallen in love with you, I knew that it was too late to do anything about it. You would never return my affections; you would never kiss me the way I so longed to kiss you. I grew to live with the fantasy of feeling your skin brush against me, the fantasy of feeling your lips on mine... until the day I helped you cheat on your test. Do you remember that day? Something in the way you looked at me, the way you acted around me, and the way you spoke to me changed. My heart nearly burst when you finally granted me my only wish. It was a selfish wish, I'll admit... but then again, isn't that what wishes are? I wished for so long, on every shooting star, that you would tell me that you loved me, and really mean it. Then one day - it actually came true.

I trusted you with my life, I trusted you with my deepest secret. I shared my first kiss with you; I gave you my virginity. At one point, nothing but you seemed to matter. As long as you were happy, I was happy. I was completely shrouded in my love for you.

And as I sit here writing you this letter - the final destination I am still not yet sure of, I find myself crying. I feel tears fall from my eyes and become absorbed into this parchment as I expose my soul to you. You're the only one who has ever known the real me, the only one who will ever know the real me.

Without a doubt, I know that you will be the only one I will ever love. Though still, I cannot bring myself to trust you as I once did nor act around you as I used to. The nights are long without you; the days are even longer.

They say time heals all wounds. They also say the ones you love never really leave you, and that you can always find them in your heart.

I forgive you for your actions, Sirius... I forgive you a thousand times. But no matter how much or how hard I try... I cannot stop the hurt I feel inside, nor can I stop the tears from flowing.

My love for you runs deep, entwined into the jagged parts of my broken soul. Your kisses; burned into me forever... a constant reminder of you. I do not regret loving you. I do not regret making love to you.

I do not regret anything but my lost ability to convince you that all you needed... was me.

Remus'

Sirius set the letter down gently as a tear rolled down his cheek. He looked over at Remus' form, his breathing had quickened, and from what he could tell - Remus was laying awake.

Remus was indeed awake; he had awoken when he heard Sirius open the letter. Remus held his breath as he heard Sirius stand and walk over to his bed. He rolled onto his back, and blinked as Sirius sat down on the side of the bed.

"This letter..." Sirius looked back down at the folded parchment. "Your words are so beautiful."

Remus did not smile at the compliment; he only let his gaze shift from Sirius to the canopy above him. He gulped hard, holding back tears.

"Remus...?"

"...Yes?"

Sirius shifted slightly as he wiped his eyes. "I..." he stopped again. "Thank-you for loving me."

"Loving is past tense," Remus replied quietly as he sat up, brining his knees to his chest. Remus motioned slightly with his head towards the parchment that Sirius held. "No where in that letter does it say that I ever stopped loving you."

"I can't help but feel that I've lost you," Sirius's breath hitched. "Completely lost you."

"Do you not ever take in what you read, Siri?" Remus smiled, and spoke in his usual soft tone as he reached forward, running his hand through Sirius' hair. "Time heals all wounds."

Sirius leaned into the touch and dropped the letter, placing his hand to Remus', holding it to the side of his face. "I'm so sorry..."

"Stop apologizing, Siri." Remus smiled and moved over, patting the bed beside him as he threw back the covers. "I know you're sorry."

Sirius shifted his position and lay down beside Remus under the covers, resting his head on Remus' shoulder. He felt Remus' hands run through his hair and his other arm pull him close. Sirius wrapped his arm around Remus' waist, entwining his legs with his mate's. He lay nearly on top of the werewolf, feeling that this still wasn't close enough.

"How can you forgive what I've done to you...?"

Remus smiled into Sirius hair, and placed a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Because I love you. You forgive those whom you love." "But-"

"Sirius..." Sirius looked up at Remus. Remus' amber eyes twinkled as he smiled down at him. "...Stop beating yourself up over the past." He kissed Sirius' forehead.

Sirius lent up and gently kissed Remus' lips. "Will you be mine again...?"

Remus kissed his lips again, slowly, and gently. "Not yet."

Sirius merely nodded and returned to his prior position, with his head resting against Remus' shoulder. Sirius was about to drift into sleep when he heard Remus begin to speak quietly into his hair.

"There has been so many times in the last few hours, I thought of completely forgetting you; thinking that it would be easy to move on. Then I would think... it's Sirius... you can't just forget your soulmate. And at first... I wanted so badly to die and have all this pain go away..." He smiled silently and ran his fingers through Sirius' hair softly, calming himself more than anything. "But then... I discovered that I would rather fix things, and work on falling love with you all over again, than just give up."

Sirius sleepily propped himself on his elbow, and looked into Remus' eyes as he hovered slightly over him. "I'm glad you decided against forgetting me."

Remus smiled stupidly, sighing as he ran his hands along Sirius' naked back. "You want to know what made me decide not to?"

"...Sure?"

Remus laughed. "Your amazing body... I couldn't stop thinking about it pressed up against mine."

Sirius laughed for the first time in a while. It was then that Sirius lent down and kissed Remus the same way he had first kissed him, tender, slow, and completely full of love.