Sorry I'm a couple days late, but my computer was on during a thunder storm (Smart eh?) and my modem got friiiiiiied. So I didn't have internet until we got a new one, therefore I couldn't update. So anyways GOMEN! Please forgive this horrible person who is stupid enough to have a computer on even though they know a storm's going on outside!

Warnings: Spoiler, non-cannon-ish.

Pairing: Kimimaro/Naru

Summery: Naruto's strongest technique isn't Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, Rasengan or Kuchiyose no Jutsu, but rather, a technique where he can take and opponent down with a single wink. Too bad it doesn't work too well this time.

Genre: Humor, you may see romance if you squint hard enough.

Rating: PG-13

""-speech

''-thoughts

'No way! How can he take out all my shadow clones so quickly!' Naruto bit his lip and growled as he surveyed the older boy before him, using the bones he took from his body as swords to destroy the massive amount of shadow clones. 'I can't believe he can use his bones as weapons! I can't keep doing Kage Bunshin no Jutsu forever.' He took a nervous step back as the last five of his clones disappeared in multiple puffs of smoke. 'This guy's 'dances' are really powerful, but I have to beat him! I have to get to Sasuke! I have to use that technique, it's the only one that could possibly work in this situation!'

He lifted his hands together to form a seal, his face a mask of utter concentration, and then his eyes snapped open.

"Orioke no Jutsu!"

Green eyes widened considerably as a beautiful-no, gorgeous blonde girl attached herself to him, her naked body feeling unnaturally warm on top of his.

'Wha-what is this feeling? I've only ever felt like this when I'm close to Orochimaru-sama.' His heart was beating so fast he thought he'd die right then.

"Kimimaro-sama, let's stop fighting, onegai?"

It could be because the only female he'd ever really been around was Tayuya, who wasn't the sweetest chocolate in the box, but when he saw those wide blue eyes staring up at him, full of unshed tears, Kimimaro was sure that this was the only girl he could ever be happy with.

It really didn't matter if she was really a guy; he was sure that the Naruto kid could easily keep up the illusion for most of the rest of his life.

He wrapped his arms around the pigtailed girl and held her tight to his chest.

Meanwhile, Naruto was vaguely wondering why Kimimaro hadn't bled away half of his blood, and why the other boy was hugging him. 'I don't get it! What's wrong with this guy? Anyways, I have to defeat him somehow and go save Sasuke!' Naruto squirmed, trying to get out of Kimimaro's hug in a not to obvious way, it wasn't working.

"Ano, Kimimaro-sama, could you let me go, I have some things to take care of." "No." Naruto frowned. 'Well if he's going to be like that.' In a puff of smoke he was back to his original self and he deftly pushed Kimimaro away from him.

"Look, I don't have time for this, so either fight me and let me pass once I've beaten you or let me pass right now!" When the fair boy didn't respond Naruto huffed angrily and in a flash rushed past him. 'Don't worry Sasuke, I'm going to bring your stubborn ass back to Konoha whether you want to or not.'

Kimimaro stood in the open area, fingers twitching. 'She's… Gone?'

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

It had been a week since Kakashi had dragged an unconscious Sasuke and Naruto back to the country of the leaf, and both boys were still recovering, although neither seemed to want to stay in the hospital. Sasuke would usually just go train on the roof but Naruto had actually snuck out a few times to get some ramen, and in the end Shizune had decided it would be a lot less troublesome if they allowed him to go home a little ahead of schedule.

Naruto wouldn't have wanted to go home if he knew what was waiting for him.

"NANI?"

His apartment was absolutely spotless! That definitely wasn't how he had left it! And there were pictures all over the place of…

"KIMIMARO?" A hand clamped down on his shoulder. "You called, dearest?" Naruto gripped the hand and quickly flipped the white haired boy over his shoulder. Kimimaro kept hold of his wrist and blinked up at him from his place on the floor. "Now that wasn't a very nice thing to do, but…" With a small tug on his captured wrist Naruto was sent crashing down beside Kimimaro.

"Itaiiii…" Naruto rubbed his horribly abused hip and glared at the boy beside him. "Why the hell are you here, and what the fuck did you do to my apartment?" "Before I tell you that, you have to change into the girl."

Naruto furrowed his eyebrows and glared. "Why?" "Just do it." "No." "If you don't I'll find that pink haired girl you always talk to and pierce her heart with my spinal cord." "W-What? Why would you do something like that to Sakura-chan?" "I won't if you do as I say." "Fine fine." Naruto hastily picked himself up off the ground and threw Kimimaro a dirty look.

"Henge!"

Two beautifully round, blue eyes narrowed when the smoke faded away. "What the hell are you doing teme?" 'He'd better not be doing what I think he's doing, because that's just way too fucked up for me to deal with right now.'

"Naruto, we may be enemies, we may have fought each other in the past, but I would like to put that all behind us in this moment as you answer my inane question: will you marry me?"

Naruto did the only thing he really could do: he feinted.

'It was all a dream. Only a dream. Just a dream. Kimimaro doesn't know where you live. He isn't in your house right now. He isn't sitting at the foot of the bed, smirking because he knows that I'm awake and I'm just pretending to be asleep because-'

"Hey, I know you're awake." '… Damn.' Blue eyes peeked out curiously from behind thick eyelashes, widening considerably when they saw two lumps that shouldn't have been there anymore. "Kimimaro, what did you do?"

Kimimaro blinked, almost looking innocent, almost. He was smirking rather evilly after all. "Who me? I just made it so that you'd stay in your female form for a bit longer than normal, like, oh I don't know, forever." "WHAT!" "But let's not talk about that-" A genuine smile crept over Kimimaro's lips. "I'd much rather talk about… Marriage."

Naruto face faulted. "Uh, dude, in case you haven't noticed, not only am I really a guy, but I'm also thirteen, I'm too young to get married." Kimimaro clenched his fists tightly. "Age means nothing when you're in love! Why, look at the infatuation I've had with Orochimaru for all these years, and he's thirty five years older than I am!" Naruto slowly began backing away. "Dude, that's fucked up, and who's in love anyways, certainly not me." Tears sprung forth in Kimimaro's eyes and Naruto sweat dropped.

"But I've only just found you, of course you are not yet in love with me as I am with you, but I'm sure, that soon so long as I nurture our sweet relationship-" "No. Just no." "That someday you too will feel as I do-" "Umm, I'm trying to protest here." "Ever since I first saw you like you are now, I knew you were the girl for me-" "But I'm really a GUY!" "And now that we are together, not even Orochimaru could tear us apart!" Kimimaro glomped onto Naruto, who was struggling to breathe under Kimimaro's bone crushing hold. "I already told you… This wouldn't work out." "NO! With the power of love any obstacle can be demolished! Drink milk love life!" "… What?" "Nothing! Ehehehe…"

Naruto squirmed uncomfortably in the bear hug, dammit his breasts really hurt from being crushed against Kimimaro's chest! 'And I'm all unbalanced in this form, I can't fight properly like this, I'm taller than normal with more weight in the front, I'll trip over or something!' He glared up at the suspiciously calm looking Kimimaro, closed eyes, even breathing. 'He had better not have gone to sleep on top of me, or there will be hell to pay!… Once I get back to normal, I'm sure someone can change me back!'

Unfortunately, everyone he asked to help him on this little endeavor ended up laughing, or just told him he looked batter this way, the perverts! And he wasn't wrong about being unbalanced either, he'd turned into such a klutz! And whenever he managed to trip over, knock into or bump against something Kimimaro always just happened to be nearby, jumping in before Naruto could actually hit the ground.

Now Naruto kind of knew how Sasuke felt about all his fan girls, extremely annoyed. Of course Kimimaro didn't admit to stalking him around, just like he didn't admit to anyone that he really worked for Orochimaru.

When confronted about this, Kimimaro simply said that due to some reason, Orochimaru would have believed that he'd have died in their confrontation, so he really didn't work for Orochimaru anymore, since the older man definitely wouldn't have approved of their relationship. And of course, Naruto would reply with "What relationship?" and then Kimimaro would go into one of his freaky love rants. And Naruto, not wanting to go listen to anymore freaky love rants, decided to just go along with whatever Kimimaro said, unfortunately this meant that Kimimaro thought Naruto was getting used to him.

Which he most definitely was not!

Anyways, a definite turning point in their 'relationship' was one morning, a couple of weeks after Kimimaro had barged into his life, when Naruto had seen the green eyed boy cough up blood. He was naturally worried and tried to drag Kimimaro to the hospital, the other boy said it was useless, it was to late to be helped…

And then he said that the only reason he thought he lived as long as he was, was because the love in his heart wouldn't let him die.

Now then, Naruto usually didn't let things told to him by subordinates of evil beings tug at his heart strings, but hell! Kimimaro had said it so sincerely that Naruto was sure he was going to start sobbing right there in the middle of the street.

Man, he really was starting to act more girly… So now he had a girly personality along with girly clothes…

Kimimaro would pay dearly for this… Maybe… He was really just too used to the guy hanging all over him now to hurt him, and he'd probably feel really, really bad if he ever hurt him, since the other boy was so sure that they were in love. It just wouldn't be right to make him see the truth…

Naruto woke up one morning to the sound of muffled coughing and sighed. 'He's coughing a lot more lately, does he really think I don't notice?' He crept out of his room in his black, female pajamas and pressed his ear up against the door of the bathroom. 'If you really are doomed to die, then don't you want to do it painlessly? It would be a lot easier on you if you went to a doctor's, even if it's just to help with the pain and coughing.' Naruto bit his plump bottom lip relentlessly. 'And I've seen your hands after you cough, covered in blood, how much longer do you have here, and why are you wasting it with me?'

The next day Kimimaro had to be hospitalized after a rather serious coughing fit, he'd been injected with some clear liquid that Naruto couldn't remember the name of, he had dozed off after the injection and Naruto had paced around the hospital room with worry.

'The doctors said that his lungs can't take much more and neither can the rest of his body. He might not wake up.' His eyes drifted over the Kimimaro's still form, and couldn't help but get locked on his peaceful expression.

'I wonder if he's dreaming.'

Green eyes flew open and Naruto jumped back a bit, pressing a hand to his chest. "God, that was freaky!" Kimimaro looked over at Naruto wearily, his eyes questioning.

"Were you watching over me?" Naruto nodded, taking a step forward, Kimimaro's voice sounded so weak.

"I'm glad that I could spend my last moments with you, Naruto." "Now now, no need to get all dramatic about this, I'm sure you'll be fine." Naruto knelt down beside Kimimaro and held onto the other boy's cold hand.

Kimimaro took in an unsteady breath, his eyes slowly closing until they were almost completely shut. "Naruto, can I ask you a favor?" "Sure, anything." Naruto leant in closer, almost positive he knew what the request would be.

"Could we… That is to say, may I…" Naruto pressed his lips against Kimimaro's and tightened his hold on the other boy's hand when he felt it go limp, then there was a puff of smoke around him as he returned to normal.

He broke away from the prone form in the hospital bed and with one last squeeze on his hand walked out of the room.

'I hope that you can find your true love on the other side, Kimimaro.'