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Chapter Three: I'd Rather Be Here
He was first to look away this time, trying desperately to hide his feelings and control himself.
'You're with Brooke, you're with Brooke, you're with Brooke.' He said to himself over and over again in his head.
Peyton brought it up again, "So you never answered my question, how are things with you and Brooke?"
Lucas sighed, "Honestly, I dont know right now. No, not even right now. I never know. Sometimes I think I'm just wasting my time, no, I know I'm wasting my time. And I know I should stop because, I mean, I think I've wasted enough time chasing her. And why I was chasing her? I couldnt even tell you, and not because I dont want to tell you, but because I dont know why I did it."
"Same reason I went after Jake," Peyton revealed.
"Oh yea...Jake. So, how are you two? Still keep in touch?" Lucas asked seriously as Peyton laughed a little. Lucas looked at her confused, "Okay, I dont know why that's funny but-"
Peyton interupted him, "No, it's not that it's funny, it's more pathetic. You remember when I was gone a few days from school last week?"
Lucas nodded, Peyton continued, "Well, I was actually visiting Jake."
Lucas raised his eyebrows, looking suprised as Peyton just nodded, "And, well, to make a long story short-" Peyton was cut off by Lucas's cell phone ringing.
Lucas pulled it out of his pocket and Brooke's name flashed across it. "Oh my god, our cell phones, duh! We could have used those all along!" Peyton laughed as Lucas just stared down at his cell phone. "Well, arent you going to answer?" Peyton asked.
"No..." Lucas replied, as he placed his cell phone back in his pocket.
Peyton looked confused, "Well... should we call someone else or-"
Lucas cut her off as he shook his head, "Really, I would rather stay here with you, Peyt."
"What? Are you serious? We're stuck in a bathroom, Lucas," Peyton laughed as did Lucas.
"No, I really want to," Lucas reassued her, being more serious.
"Well, thats weird that you want to stay locked in a bathroom but...also really sweet in a way." Peyton said as she smiled at Lucas.
"So, you and Jake...?" Lucas said, getting back to the subject.
"Right, well like I said, to make a long story short, I... well, I asked him to marry me-"
Lucas's eyes widened, "You what!"
Peyton laughed at his reaction, "And well, he said yes, but... there was this, incident, and it made me and him realize we were making a huge mistake."
Lucas's mouth dropped and he had trouble forming sentences. "I cant... you... how could you... I... you... I just cant believe you forgot to tell me this! What, did it slip your mind or something?"
Peyton sighed, "No, its just... I dont know."
Lucas nodded, "So, what was this incident? I mean, what exactly made you realize that you were making a mistake?"
Peyton answered his question with a question, knowing she couldnt tell him the real answer, "Well, what made you realize that you were wasting time with Brooke?"
Lucas sighed as he looked to the floor, "Shes not... I just dont think shes the one for me. She doesnt make me happy, she doesnt understand me or what I need, there's really never been any connection there, besides physically," Lucas answered honestly.
"Then why stay with her?"
"Why run to Jake?"
Peyton sighed.
"For what its worth, Peyton, I'm really glad you didnt marry Jake," Lucas said as Peyton smiled slightly.
"Yea, me too. It was just... there was something holding me back, not letting me give my all to him, there was... something else there."
Lucas nodded, "Did you love him?" he asked.
"I thought I did, but not enough to marry him and let go of something else."
"What? What is that something else?" Lucas pleaded.
"Nothing, I cant really tell you. But you never answered me, Luke. Why do you stay with Brooke?"
Lucas sighed, "Theres nobody else," He said as he looked up at Peyton who was staring at him. "And, you know, I think thats another reason why I chased her and I was so persistant, I didnt want to be alone."
"Yea, me neither..." Peyton said softly as tears starting to roll down her cheek.
Lucas noticed them and brought his hand up to her face to whipe them away. "Dont cry Peyton, I'm here for you, I'll always be here for you. Its just you and me, okay? Its always going to be."