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Against The Wind
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I… I… missed her…
I placed a finger under her chin and raised her face so her eyes would meet mine… With what I saw… I regretted wishing to have her here with me now…
I placed a hand on her cheeks and gently move a finger across her cheek to wipe away the wetness of it. She won't look at me… She keeps on looking at her side to avoid my eyes… It made me … well… It made me want her more…
I want her to look at me… to see how miserable I was… I want her to gaze at me… To make her see that I regret all the things that I've said… I really want her to make me feel a lot more rejected… because maybe… just maybe… when she does that… I'd be able to tell her all the thoughts that runs throughout my entire mind every single millisecond…
But she won't look at me…
Her eyes doesn't show anger or sadness… though her face says… 'i'm hurting'
I wanted to punch the guy that made her like this… I needed to cement my finger markings on his face and body… My feet required some kicking and trashing to do with his face… I wanted to shout at him and tell him how useless, stupid and pathetic he was…
But I kept on forgetting something… That guy is me…
I desired to hug her tightly… but that would seem too out of character for me. Damn all the people who judge me! I'm only human! I can do anything or almost anything a normal person can do! I can even do a lot of things that a normal person can't do!
So damn them all!!! I won't care anymore!
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There were some monks who'd stop and look at them for a while… but they know not to mess with their great Sanzo-sama. There were some that would whisper to each other but would quickly walk out of the sight as soon as they finish gossiping.
The breeze of the air was cold and you'll get Goosebumps… though those two doesn't seem to mind. The leaves of the trees were ruffling strongly, it was very noisy, and the drizzle was getting a bit heavier.
Sanzo was still holding Rein's cheeks… looking at her as if begging for her to look at him. Even for just a moment…
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He was still holding my cheeks… I can see the look on his face at the end of my line of sight. I wanted to look at him and tell him it's okay. I don't really mind. If you want you can shout at me all day long, and I still won't get mad… but that would be ridiculous… so I just look away.
I'm also afraid that when I'd look at him, he would see how afraid I was when he raised his voice at me… how scared I was that he was angry at me… but what I feared most was the thought that he would leave me alone… again…
I wanted to cry in front of him… no… I needed to cry… I needed to get all of these pains… I needed to shout at the whole population of men! Or… I guess I just need to tell him what I felt and what I'm still feeling…
I looked at him… and when I met his eyes… my heart was beating 50 times per second… I could see how scared he was… I couldn't believe what I was seeing… I wanted to rub my eyes to see if it's real even though I couldn't move.
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I can't feel my body… I can't believe how much my knees are shaking. It's a good thing that they're hidden under my robe..
My eyes widened as her eyes unexpectedly met mine… and now, even my eyes were trembling. I can feel cold sweat running down my back and from my forehead little rings of sweat was beginning to form.
I was about to say something… I was ready to tell her all that is me. I was ready to offer her my all… and I did try… I said, "I want you to know how…" That was all I got to say when I heard an angel's voice… A voice that I can never forget… together with the voices if my past…
And the voices said, "Sanzo! We're back!"
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tsuzuku…
I need reviews! Plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!
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