Startled, she looked up to find Eric. Her mouth went dry and for a long, tense moment her mind seemed almost as if it had frozen in time. He stood over her; his face set grimly, his steely eyes guarded. When it became apparent to him that she could say nothing, he took the seat across from her.
His movements snapped Mystique from her trance. "Eric…"
Hesitantly, he reached his hand forward and took one of hers into both of his own. "Raven. How did you find me? I wrote to you, I told you not to look for me…I don't want you to see me like this…"
His heart fluttered slightly in his chest that she did not pull away from him- he remembered the way that he'd left her all too well. Eric had never been one to enter into endeavors lightly. His past was consumed with far too much horror and heartache for him to have a lighthearted approach to life- his relationships with women were no different.
He was not so lost that he could not love. He had loved his first, he had loved those that came after, he had loved his warriors, his companions and his friends. He had loved his wife, his one wife…there had been women that feared his power, women that challenged him and women that had been killed, used as a way to get at him by his enemies…
Mystique, for all her glory, could be no different. In her ranting that night, she had proved everything to be true- for him, she had risked her life countless times, nearly losing it to Wolverine, a mission that he'd sent her into. She had been forced to lower herself into seducing the disgusting guard. Eric was constantly bothered by the nagging thought, the wondering of what kind of acts the odious Laurio had had her perform before finally giving up the information on the prison where he'd been held.
And now, Mystique had lost her mutation because of him. The guilt had given him powerful anxiety attacks nearly every night. While the others had been asleep, Eric had been convulsing in pain, curled on the floor and wracking his mind to find a solution to bring his Mystique back. The night she'd ranted at him, every single word she'd said had been true- he had been ignoring her, he hadn't spoken with her, not even looked her in the eyes during their stay at the base.
It had been a horrible mistake to sleep with her.
In all of their adventures, he'd never crossed that line, no matter how many times he'd considered it, no matter how strong his desire. He was a man, and naturally desired the flesh of a woman, but Mystique often seemed unattainable. There had always been too much to deal with- recruiting more mutants to the cause, planning tactics against anti-mutant militant groups, gaining information…he'd had no want to further complicate things. He had grown to love Mystique- his student, his right hand, his companion and great friend- too much to burden her with his feelings.
He didn't know why he'd let his control slip with her that one night; he'd been rough, he knew it, he'd looked upon her bruised- used- naked body the morning after their powerful union. Her face had been peaceful as she slept, but he'd known that the moment she awoke things would never be the same between them again- she'd look upon him with untrusting, angry eyes.
Still, there had been bigger things to worry over. He was a leader, and couldn't afford to put himself over the other mutants who so needed him. He'd ordered Pyro to assemble everyone and had them leave within the hour. The young man had demanded that Eric at the very least leave a note for Mystique to explain, rather than just leave her with no idea as to what had happened.
'I'm sorry. You don't deserve this, find a good life. I don't love you. I never did. My end is near, I'm sorry...I lied, I do love you. Don't try to find me. Goodbye, Raven.'
The note he'd ended up leaving was short, but seemed the easiest way to convey how he'd come to feel about her. He didn't want for her suffering; truly, he wished to give her a happy life, but what had he brought upon her so far? The misery of fallen friends, constant risk to her life, the use of her remarkable abilities taken from her…
Mystique blinked at the name he called her. "I just…I'm not sure. I wanted to see you." Her hand tightened on the small clutch purse in her lap.
Eric's eyes held no anger toward her- how could he? He wondered if she knew that he himself had fallen to the cure; an ironic end, it seemed. He didn't want her here to see how far he'd sunk- he'd once been all-powerful in her eyes, she had adored him…those days were long behind them now. The shame and guilt came after him in a sick rush.
"You shouldn't have come to me. I know that you're well-off, the government pays well for information." He said coolly.
Mystique blanched. Eric nodded. "Yes, I know that you told them where to find us. It doesn't much matter now, though, does it? Don't be sorry. I should apologize to you. I never thought things would end this way,"
"Who says that things have ended?" Mystique's green eyes gazed deeply into his own. "I came all this way to see you, Eric. Please don't push me away now. We're not strangers or enemies."
Her words brought on only more guilt over the end that had found them both, and shame over how he'd used her for so many years. A cold hand squeezed his heart. His hands tightened over hers. "I ruin everything I touch," he stated coolly, inwardly dying once he realized how right he was. He had failed many- the mutants who needed him to fight, Charles, Magda, his children, John, Mystique.
She reached forward to run her fingertips lightly over his gaunt face. "You didn't ruin me," she said softly.
A sudden, jealous spear lanced through him- had she touched anyone else this way? He caught her slim wrist in an iron grip. "How did you come to be with the angel?" he demanded.
Mystique pulled back her hand. "He brought John and I here to see you."
Oh, good God, John is here too? Cold waves of shame swept over him- how could he face John as a human man, rather than the powerful mutant leader he'd been before?
Eric hung his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Raven…please, no more. I can't talk to you here," it was too public- he felt exposed and vulnerable; the walk back to his place would give him time to collect himself.
Her pale face seemed concerned. "We can go to Warren's apartment-"
"No! I'd rather die than set foot in Worthington's home!" Eric stood abruptly and led her away from the park, towards an upscale apartment complex. His skin began to crawl at the thought that Mystique, his Mystique had spent time with that fluttering little traitor. How easily she forgot that it was the Worthington family that developed the cure in the first place!
He knew that he was becoming irrational- a cure could have been developed by anyone, anywhere, but he still hated the thought of her with that young millionaire. In fact, the thought sickened him with anger. If he'd had his power, the cars around them would be flying!
As it was, Mystique followed a half step behind him as she always had, but always keeping pace. He'd missed her so much in the last few weeks- the isolation that he'd encased himself in had long since began to eat away at him. Perhaps it was the longing for others hat had drawn him to the park for chess- even though he rarely spoke with anyone and only played the game with himself, he still wished to see and be seen; it was perverse, he knew, but he could not help himself.
They made their way up to his floor and he led her into his apartment- rented under one of his several aliases. The high-rise was very nice, though smaller than Warren's. The furniture was in good taste and the area was clean- she felt comfortable.
"Have a seat, I'll make you some tea," he said quickly. Eric felt awkward, and didn't know how he could begin to explain himself- why he'd been so rough as to practically force her on their first and last night together, why he'd tried to lie in that brief note and say that he didn't love her…
He moved to the kitchen and set about preparing the tea and some food for her, desperate to simply busy his hands. He stopped short when he saw her standing in the doorway, a coy smile on her face. "Eric, please stop that. You're acting like we've only just met- have your forgotten all our years?"
He put down the kettle. "No."
She moved closer, the coy smile spreading on her face, her entire demeanor effortlessly arousing him with her inherent seductive power. "You haven't forgotten me?"
"No, never." There was pain in his voice, but Mystique chose to ignore it.
Her hands smoothed over his chest and shoulders, her body pressed to his, their mouths close enough to touch, but she held back just long enough to look into his eyes. "You haven't forgotten how you left me?"
He reached to her, brought his hand to touch her cheek. "Raven, please forgive what I did to you-"
"Don't call me that!"
Without warning, the green eyes that held his flashed golden, and with one swift movement, she impaled him with the weapon that she'd brought along with her. There had been doubt in the back of her mind of whether or not she should use it on him, but at once her heart took to no qualm in sliding the sharp, thin metal between his ribs.
Her face remained impassive as Eric lurched to the floor below her, his cry of surprise stifled by the power of the pain wracking his body. As he laid at her feet, he was able to lift his head and look into her cold reptile eyes. She smiled in triumph.