"Harry. Harry, wake up."

"'S okay, you can keep it…" Harry mumbled, slowly leaving the dark recesses of unconsciousness.

"Harry, please." Draco put a hand on Harry's shoulder and shook him. "You've got to wake up. We need to leave."

"You really think Draco will like it this way?" Harry said, still caught in his dream. "I mean, he likes my skirt, but I really think the aluminum foil is a bit much…"

"Harry, you kinky little bastard, WAKE UP!"

Harry's eyes flew open. "Huh? Wha- where am I? Draco?"

"You're in Voldemort's Very Secret Hiding Place. Now come on, we've got to leave. The Death Eaters will be here any minute, and they'll want revenge. Get up."

"But… what happened?"

Draco turned to him with a smirk. "Well, when you conveniently decided to pass out after your Heroic Speech, I killed the Very Evil Dark Lord with your shoe."

Harry's jaw hit the floor. "My… my shoe?" he asked intelligently.

Draco sighed. "Yes, Harry, your shoe. Apparently that prophecy of yours was wrong." He hesitated a moment, and then the smirk returned. "You know what is prophetic, though?" he asked in an undertone, taking a step closer.

Harry gulped. "W-what?" he managed to gasp, feeling like a fish flailing on the end of a fisherman's line.

"Your dream," Draco whispered. "I hope you remember it, because I'm intrigued as to what you did with the aluminum foil…"

He leaned in, but just then there was a pop and the Very Small Fangirl appeared in the space between them, screeching.

The Death Eaters are coming! she yelled.

Harry blinked at her. "Who are you?" he asked in surprise.

Draco, who was aiming a Former Death Eater Death Glare at the Very Small Fangirl, turned his gaze to stare at Harry. "You can see her?" he asked incredulously.

"Well, yeah, I guess so. You can see her too? I thought for a second that I was still dreaming, but I guess I'm not."

Draco frowned. "No, you're awake… but I don't understand why you can see her this time when you couldn't before."

Harry shrugged. "I guess it's one of those Unexplainable Things that authors like to write all the time in their stories. You know, like how you were able to kill Voldemort when the prophecy said I was the only one who could kill him…"

"Oh. Okay," Draco said, seemingly unconcerned by this. "Now, where were we?"

Harry blushed. "Well, I kind of hoped that you were about to kiss me…"

Draco smiled. Smiling felt strange to his facial muscles, but it also seemed like the normal thing to do in the situation, so he told his facial muscles to bugger off. He leaned in again, but this time the Very Small Fangirl actually put one hand on each of their faces and pushed. She pushed so hard that they both stumbled backwards, then stood there rubbing their bruised faces and staring at her.

Didn't you hear me? she shrieked, waving her arms frantically. I'm trying to save your lives here! THE DEATH EATERS ARE COMING!

They stared at her, and then looked at each other. "Well, shit," they said in unison. "We should get out of here."

Draco held out his hand to Harry, and then they ran back down the passageway that they had come in through. The Very Small Fangirl followed, shaking her head.

Behind them, they could hear running footsteps mingled with yelled commands and the occasional high-pitched giggle. They made it past the wards unscathed, and before they could be awkward about it, Draco pulled Harry into his arms and closed his eyes, concentrating hard.

The next thing Harry knew, he was lying on the ground just outside Hogwarts, and there was a warm body on top of him. Draco's face suddenly appeared in front of his, grinning widely.

"Shall we make your dream come true?" he asked. "I happen to know an Extremely Unnecessary Spell which will come in very handy in this case, I think…"

He pointed his wand at Harry's clothing and, with a flick of the wrist and a whispered "Aluminus", turned the skirt and corset into aluminum foil and proceeded to rip them off of him.

The Very Small Fangirl settled down with a smile and a Very Small Video Camera. She had saved their lives, and it was time for her Reward.

And they all lived Happily Ever After and had lots of Hot Kinky Monkey Sex.