Please Don't Tell Her

Summary: What if, instead of Lorelai seeking comfort from Chris, Luke is the one who goes to find comfort, and then tries to make it right.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, except my pretty new computer, and that isn't fully paid for yet, so in fact I own nothing.

Rating: Teen.

Sea of Doubts

Lorelei really didn't know what she was doing as she drove to the Woodbridge hospital. He had cheated, betrayed her, and worst of all, he didn't seem so grief stricken when she had confronted him earlier. But how could she leave him alone after he had almost begged her on the phone earlier.

She had gotten dressed immediately but she just couldn't leave her room. Or her daughter's guest room, to be more accurate. She had been able to fall asleep only minutes before her cell phone started ringing at three in the morning. She had cried pretty much since she had left the house after the confrontation.

But she had memorized all of Luke's tones, ones filled with anger, or disgust, and one that was filled with happiness, joy and excitement. Tones of lust and want and desire, and tones of not being interested. She knew the exact pitch of when he told the truth, and when she had heard his so called explanation, she knew it was a lie. Not because she had been almost 100 percent sure that he had not just slept on Anna's couch, but because it was a tone she had never heard before. Filled with fear and anxiety.

But none of that mattered anymore; she was supposed to be on her way, to be there for Luke. He had been there so many times, that it didn't matter what he had done in the last 24 hours, she would be there.

But her brain and heart were both screaming at her to do different things. She knew that she had to be there for Luke, and her heat agreed with her. Even though it was broken and battered, she knew she had to be there. But her brain kept telling her that he had been the one to betray her, to make a mockery of what they had, and why should she go and hold his hand.

The mother in her knew why she was though. She knew that when your child is sick and scared, it's all well and good to be alone and independent and to handle it by your self, but she had never encountered a time in her mothering career, when she had said 'gee I am glad I was alone in that scary time.'

So it may have taken a lot of time and effort, she made it to the hospital in one piece, without much evidence of how heartbroken she truly was. She managed to put her own troubles into the back of her mind and concentrated on the poor little girl in surgery.

The troops rallied as they say and soon half of Stars Hallow had managed to walk through the halls of Woodbridge Memorial. Everyone knew who Luke was, and they had no idea what he had done hours before. And Lorelai wasn't going to tell them.

Soon, Luke had almost spent 18 hours straight waiting to hear if his daughter was ok, and she felt he needed to go home. She sent him off to sleep and she waited with her daughter, and her daughters somewhat ex to wait for news about April. No one knew where Anna was, and the police suspected her, and to Lorelai, that was something unimaginable. How could any mother hurt their child intentionally? Lorelei's rational side knew it happened every day. Child abuse in every form happened in every single place in the world, and as ugly and horrible as it was, it was a fact. But that didn't mean that she had to accept that is happened.

Lorelai finally left the hospital after the urgings of doctors and her mother. She was amazed that Emily had taken such a compassionate route with this one. Normally she could imagine such lectures to include on how dare Luke just leave, or imagine the type of woman Luke associated with, but the only thing Emily Gilmore ranted about, was how horrible some of the facilities were.

So instead she graciously bowed out and drove to the Diner, to make sure things were ok. She knew that Luke had the mind to call Cesar to open, but still she felt like it was her duty to make sure it was ok.

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Luke was woken up by the door of his apartment being shut. He lifted his head blurrily, and he saw Lorelai hesitate at the door and he sighed. For the first time, he was reminded that he was responsible for this. 'Hey.' Luke managed to say, his voice gruff from sleep. Lorelai hesitated at first, but then she came to sit on the couch. Not trying to think of what she had done with Luke on said couch. 'Hey.' Lorelai said back rather sullenly, but under the circumstances, it was amazing she was even there. 'Lorelai I..' Luke began but she just gave him a look and he shut up. She didn't want to her anything about their troubles. It was about April and finding Anna.

'Is there any news on April?' Luke asked hopefully, and they both knew there wouldn't be. 'No, she's still unconscious. And no signs of Anna anywhere.' Lorelai looked at Luke to try to find any hint of worry from Luke, that wasn't just about the mother of his child, but she found none. Or she just didn't see it.

'I don't know how she could have done this.' Luke said and wiped the back of his neck with his hand. 'Look Luke, we don't know anything until we hear her side of the story, if she has one. You shower, and I will get some coffee and things for the people waiting for us at the hospital.' Luke hesitated and reached out and touched her hand. There was a spark, and he hoped it showed her that they were still. Whatever they were.

But Lorelai flinched and gave Luke a look, to display her need for personal space. 'Ok.' Luke says finally, dejected and hurt, and Lorelai leaves the room in a hurry, neither of them noticing the tear running down her cheek.

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Time went by slowly for everyone, and finally after three days, the doctors told Luke that the longer April was out, the less likely for her to wake up. Luke hadn't slept besides that one day that Lorelai sent him home, and he know knew the hospitals routine. Liz and Jess had done shifts, sitting there with Luke, who was mostly silent at this point.

Luke shut his eyes and thought about the short time he knew his daughter, and hoped it wasn't the only time he would ever get. He couldn't understand how Anna had done it, how se could hurt their daughter. There was no sign of Anna. She wasn't in any surrounding hospitals or public places, it was like she disappeared.

And it scared Luke, he didn't know about April's allergies, or what she liked to read. He had just met her, knew so little about her, and now he was responsible for this almost fourteen year old girl. Luke stopped looking to Lorelai for comfort or support, and he missed her. Rory had kindly offered to sit there with him, but he knew she had end of school stuff. Probably with that fancy boyfriend of hers. He still thinks back on what Dean said. How the Gilmore's may think that they are small town, but they are anything but.

He can see Lorelei doing sophisticated things somewhere, without a care in the world, with her daughter. She didn't need to be tired and weak and alone in a small dark hospital room. But he would never wish her anywhere but here, with him.

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Rory Gilmore wasn't comfortable in hospitals. They were always so organized and ordered, that it made her feel like she should be better at it. Organization was something that had come easily for her. When she was a child, never did her report cards mention anything resembling the need to work on her organization skills.

She liked order and that every thing had a place, but she wasn't such a nut, that she couldn't live in a slightly messy world. After all she is a Gilmore Girl after all. She knew that things went together. Junk food and wallowing, extra cheese and pizza, and of course the most important one, Luke and Lorelai.

She knew her mother, and Luke is the perfect match, just enough patience to truly appreciate everything that is Lorelai Victoria Gilmore. Luke knew not to question her mother's choice in movies, or anything else for that matter.

She had never seen her mother so content and happy just to spend time with one person. She didn't need to come up with little games to occupy herself when she was around Luke. He could almost keep up with her, and that was an amazing thing.

As a child of unwed teen parents, she knew that parents didn't necessary belong together. She knew Christopher was all wrong for her mother, and she recognized it when her father had finally made the effort to see her for the first time when she was sixteen. She saw how nervous her mother was, and she noticed how little her father knew about the Lorelai of post pregnancy.

And she knew that Anna and Luke were like that. It disgusted her that someone would keep one parents away from the child. It didn't matter that she had felt Luke wasn't a 'kid' person, Anna had no right. And most of all, she knew that Luke was her mother's, just like her mother belonged to Luke, and this was why Rory felt so disorganized.

She felt like the kid of fighting parents, wanting to be fair and equal but having to side with one parent. She wanted to defend Luke, but logically it just didn't make sense. He had been the one to betray them, been the one to forget how close they had been to becoming a family.

She wanted to push Luke, to slap him, to make him feel even an ounce of the hurt her mother and her were going through, just by his one act. But they couldn't. Luke was going through hell and it wasn't even connected to them. They had no claim on it. It was because of the other woman, and her child, or I guess you could call it their child. Even the words felt bitter on her tongue, and it wasn't about her.

For the last three days she had been there for Luke, going to get stuff for April, getting coffee, making sure he was eating, and being there when her mother would quietly walk to the nearest washroom and cry for a few minutes, and then come back, with almost not evidence of what she had been doing.

So Rory just sat there, thinking of ways how she can organized a chaotic situation. She was powerless, and she wasn't even involved, she was a spectator, begging to be involved.

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Anna was unconscious; she could not remember where she was, or really who she was. She lay in a hospital bed, but she didn't know that. She really had no idea who she was. Everything was dark and she knew that something had happened. She could hear people shuffling about and hear the occasional bleeps of some type of machine, but after all, she was unconscious and she couldn't exactly tell what was happening. She just knew that she had done something, and that it would change her life forever.

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After almost four days, Lorelai had her limit. She had sat with Luke assuring him, making sure he ate and drank and made sure he slept a little, and all the while she tried to do that for herself. Rory had been there, making sure that she took care of herself, but she had been exhausted.

Lorelai sighed as she dried her now red eyes and sighed. She couldn't do it anymore. She couldn't pretend. Of course she was concerned about April. She was a human being after all, and she was a mother, and she still loved Luke, so of course she was concerned. But had pushed down her heartache for Luke, but she was done.

She sighed, trying to gain the courage and strength to tell Luke that she was leaving, and she didn't know if she could come back.

She walked with purpose and with a spark that had been missing from her life ever since she had found out that her fiancée had lied to her for months. She was tired of comparing her life in before and after shots.

She saw Luke see her, and she hoped that he still knew her, and knew that she was done, so she wouldn't have to utter the words, that could possibly kill her.

'Luke, I…'

TBC

Author's Note: Sorry about lack of updates, Life was crazy before I left, and I wasn't really sure what happened to Anna. The Last part kind of wrote itself, where this part hid from me for days on end. Hope you like it. I will try to update it before I go to Oxford (Sunday)