Disclaimer: I'm gonna be using a line from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory in this chapter. I only used it because it fit so well. I didn't even realize it was from that movie until after I typed it. anyway, I don't own CATCF, nor do I own POTC, so . . . yeah. See if you can find it.

Also, something to note - I will be using the word 'bedlam' in this chapter. For those of you who don't know, a bedlam is an older version of an insane asylum. Back then, that's what they called it, as far as I know. If I'm wrong, apologies.

Chapter 9: Fooling Creevey

Jack and Will stepped off the dock, followed by much of the crew.

Jack turned to the crew members.

"Dismissed," he said, "but remember wot I told you, an' be back at the Pearl in three hours."

The crew went their separate ways, and Jack continued onward, Will keeping in step with him, wondering what it was that Jack had told the crew earlier. He decided not to ask.

"Wait!" said a girl's voice from behind them. Jack and Will turned in unison to see who it was.

"Elizabeth!" they said - in unison once again.

"Wait for me," she said, holding her dress up to run and catch up with them.

"What are you doing here!" said Will, sounding both shocked and angry.

"Aye, wot 'e said!" Jack shouted.

"I wanted to come," she said stonily, "so I did. I'm here to help."

"Why did you let 'er come?" Jack rounded on Will angrily.

"I didn't, I told her to stay!" said Will. "Why did you come Elizabeth?" he asked her, still furious.

"You don't have to be so angry. I've already explained myself," she said simply, brushing her hair out of her eyes.

"How could I 'ave not known that you and Will snuck on my ship!" Jack asked to no one in particular, sounding angry with himself.

Elizabeth tried not to smile. "Actually I was sort of amazed at that myself. After all, I did vomit over the side of the ship a couple of times."

Jack raised an eyebrow. "I…I thought that was Duncan…one o' me crew…he gets seasick sometimes…" Jack trailed off, mentally reprimanding himself for being so stupid.

"I wanted to come," said Elizabeth, "So I did. And it's too late to take me back, so just shut your mouths and deal with it."

Jack opened his mouth to continue the argument but Will quickly put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a look that said, trust me, you don't want to take this further. Jack gave in.

"Fine," he said, sounding rather like a child. He turned around and continuing his drunken stride. Will and Elizabeth followed.

"So," said Elizabeth, smiling now that she had won the argument,"what is it we're doing?"

"Looking for crew members, I think," said Will.

They looked at their surroundings as they followed Jack. It was somewhat crowded in Virgin Gorda. Men and women walked around, some rich, some poor, and some slaves. All in all, Will thought it was a much nicer place than Tortuga. They were just heading toward one of the streets when -

"Jack Sparrow!" said an alarmed voice from a little ways a way.

"Oh bloody bilge rats," said Jack suddenly, striding faster.

"Why, who is it?" Elizabeth asked.

"Just keep walking, pretend you didn't 'ear it," he said.

"Who is it?" Will asked.

"Jack Sparrow," said the voice again, loudly. "Stop! Stop I say!"

Jack swore and stopped his stride abruptly. Will and Elizabeth almost ran into him.

"What is it, Jack?" Will asked.

"It's Creevey," he said, as though the name were a nasty taste in his mouth. "Lieutenant Creevey. We've 'ad a few run-ins in Virgin Gorda before. He's not quite as annoying as Commodore Boring-ton, and he's certainly dumber. We'll get rid of 'im fairly quickly."

"How's that?" Will asked.

"Walk a little ways away," said Jack under his breath, "an' then come find me an' pretend I'm mental."

"What?" said Will and Elizabeth together.

"Jus' do it," he said quickly. Creevey was approaching, trying to get through the crowd to Jack. Will rolled his eyes at Elizabeth, but they both obeyed him just the same, and began to move away from Jack.

"Sparrow, you've returned to Virgin Gorda," said Creevey, when he'd reached Jack. He wore a smug look on his face. He looked like your typical Navy Lieutenant; the white wig, the uniform, and he appeared to be in fairly good shape.

"You mean fat woman?" said Jack.

"What?" said Creevey, taken aback.

"Fat woman, I said," said Jack, "say, you didn't 'appen t' see a tree walk by did ye?"

"No," said Creevey, looking confused.

"Right, well, if you see one, be sure to tell me," said Jack.

"Trees don't walk, Sparrow," said Creevey, regaining his smugness. "Stop playing games, you are under arr-"

"George!" said Will suddenly, striding up to them with Elizabeth following behind.

"'Ello," said Jack happily, who apparently didn't mind being referred to as George.

"So sorry officer," said Elizabeth, "was our dear friend George bothering you?"

"What?" said Creevey, confused again. "George? This here is Jack Sparrow the pirate, Miss."

"No no no, he thinks he's Jack Sparrow," said Will. "His name is George. He lives at a bedlam nearby where my wife and I work," he said, indicating Elizabeth, who smiled.

"I love peanuts," said Jack helpfully, now crossing his eyes at Creevey.

"No, you must be mistaken," said Creevey, who seemed to be trying to convince himself of this as well. "I've met this man before. This is Jack Sparrow. He's committed various crimes and it's time he was arrested."

"Now now, officer," said Will, smiling kindly, "you can't possibly put him in jail. Being mentally ill is not a crime. He can't help it if he thinks he's an infamous pirate."

"Really bad eggs!" said Jack loudly, right in Creevey's face. Jack's breath caused Creevey to back away a few steps.

"Are you sure of this?" he asked Will and Elizabeth, who were having a most difficult time keeping straight faces.

"Of course we are," said Elizabeth.

"Then what's his last name?" said the Lieutenant quickly, trying to catch them off guard, but Will was getting into this, and he was ready.

"Turner," he said, "his name's George William Turner, and trust me, he's with us."

Elizabeth grabbed Jack's arm and began to drag him away.

"Come on, George," she said, "time for your nap, I think."

"You 'ave a beautiful wife," said Jack, looking at someone to the left of Creevey. "She's a very lovely young man."

Creevey looked next to him. There was no one there.

"Sorry if he disturbed you, sir," said Will politely, "we'll be going now." He walked off after Elizabeth, leaving the Lieutenant stunned and confused.

"That was brilliant, Will," said Jack, clapping Will on the back once they were out of earshot of Creevey. "An' you too, Elizabeth. George William Turner . . . nice touch," he grinned at the two of them. They smiled back.

"Glad we came now, aren't you?" said Will.

"Maybe a little," said Jack, still smiling. He turned and continued to wherever it was they were headed. Will and Elizabeth followed.

"It's as if he's used that mentally ill trick before," Elizabeth pointed out.

"I wouldn't put it past him," Will agreed.

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