Judy Neutron (voice over): No.
(The camera expands to a WIDE shot to show Judy staring down at her husband. Hands on her hips and looking deadly serious.)
Hugh Neutron: What?
Judy Neutron: You are NOT going to use any of those stories as ideas for our son's next crazy adventure, Hugh Beaumont.
Hugh Neutron (a tad snippy): So? What if I am? The writers do it all the time! They download tons of this stuff and when they find one they like they just say, "Eh, good enough." What else explains the sudden focus on certain relationships during this past season? (He points to the computer screen.) That's the reason. (He smiles happily.) Hey, that rhymes!
Judy Neutron (in angry defense): They do not! That's a terrible thing to say! The past episodes have proven that the writers are capable of making a well written show.
Hugh Neutron (mockingly): Pftt, they sure reeled you in, it's just what they want you to think.
Judy Neutron (in a warning tone): You're going to be getting another phone call from Keith if you keep that attitude up. Just because you haven't been getting the best of luck with your own attempts at creativity, doesn't give you the right to insult the staff.
Hugh Neutron (bitterly): I beg to differ, sugar booger. (He returns his attention to the laptop) Here. This one sounds okay; I'll try this one out.
Judy Neutron: But most of those stories are based on menial settings filled with plot holes; not to mention plenty of spelling and grammar mistakes.
Hugh Neutron (he waves a dismissive hand): Whenever there's a plot hole or spelling error it can just be explained as subtle irony. It'll turn out fine.
(Judy shakes her head in angry disappointment; unimpressed over her husband's childish stubbornness.)
Judy Neutron: You do realize this is a new low for you, don't you dear?
Hugh Neutron (calling out joyfully): Atom!
(CUE Rotating Atom.)
(CUT To INT Shot. Retroville Park. Jimmy is walking alone, and engaging in a curious conversation with himself.)
Jimmy: Cindy, heh, Hi, um, I was wondering if.. (He shakes his head.) No. (He ponders.) Hey Vortex! How about we do something cool together? (He frowns.) Nah. (He closes his eyes briefly as he tries to think.) Cindy, do you think you'd have some interest in wanting to go watch some stars frolic in the Magellan galaxy?
Carl (off camera): So then he started to say that Cold Play had more talent than Radiohead, when it's obvious that the only alternative rock he's ever heard is Garbage.
Libby (off camera & giggly): Cold Play better than Radiohead? That's about as likely to happen as the dead rising to play in fiddle camps.
(Jimmy looks up at the sound of his friends' voices. He notices, with much confusion, that Libby and Carl are holding hands while walking down a path.)
Carl: Okay, who would win in a fight, Sonic Youth or the Black Eyed Peas?
Libby: Ooh! That's a tough one. Sonic Youth's older albums were great, they weren't dubbed the godparents to alternative rock for nothing y'know, but their recent lack of quality and overblown opinions of themselves have weakened their current status greatly; while the Black Eyed Peas possess a positive and optimistic mood to give their beats a fun and refreshing sound. Plus, they play amazing when they're live, they totally get the audience going.
Carl: Yeah, and I bet those guys wouldn't sell out to appear in a Gap or Calvin Klein ad like Kim did.
Libby: Or start a destined to fail clothing empire. No wait, spoke to soon, Will.i.am is releasing his own clothing line.
Carl: Let's hope he'll make his stuff affordable for everyone to buy rather than charge outrageous prices for a bunch of British schoolboy knockoffs.
(Jimmy is at a loss of words for this strange conversation.)
Jimmy: What? Carl and Libby aren't known for discussing hip and witty music gossip with each other. Surely there's some unusual, but logical, explanation for this.
(He approaches both of them. Carl and Libby finally take notice and they stop walking to chat.)
Carl: Hey Jim, what's new?
Libby: Anything obscure and scientific on your schedule today?
Jimmy: Ah, Nothing much. (He pauses as he eyes their hand holding again.) So, uh, what are you guys up to today?
Libby: Oh, we're just killing time by making clever remarks about the latest bands until the music store opens so we can get a chance to buy the White Stripes and Omarion's B-Sides and Rarities albums. Also, the Decemberists and Raised By Swans will be around to sign CDs at three o'clock sharp.
Carl: Yeah! Then after that, we're gonna check out the new breed of llamas at the experimental farm at the University. This time they'll have tri-colors for sure!
Libby (she smiles to Jimmy): You can tell he's been looking forward for this for the past week, can't you?
Carl (he squeezes Libby's hand delicately): I could say the same thing concerning a certain stoic, but very hip, younglady.
Libby (affectionately): You'll never change!
Carl (dreamy): Wouldn't that be the best?
Libby: Hee! Very much!
(They laugh joyfully. Jimmy is further confused by this act of out of character affection.)
Jimmy: Wow, this is a fine example of irregularity.
(Carl and Libby look at him with great puzzlement.)
Carl: What do you mean, Jim?
Jimmy (pointing out the hand holding): Um, I think your display of endearment with Libby says it all.
Carl: But Libby and I always do stuff together when we aren't partaking in one of your weekly adventures.
Jimmy (huh?): What? No you don't! Do you have any idea of what you're saying?
Libby (tiredly): Of course we have! I think we should be the ones asking you that question. (Her voice lowers with concern.) You been keeping yourself locked up in your lab too much lately, Jimmy?
Jimmy (he looks to Libby): No. I guess I was just wondering why, um, you aren't doing that kind of thing by yourself or with Sheen.
Libby (disgusted): Geh! That Ultra Lord crazy nimrod? You know I don't enjoy being in the company of that freak, Jimmy. What is up with you?
Carl: Besides, he and Cindy are at that action figure convention downtown.
(Jimmy's eyes widen in stupefied shock.)
Jimmy (gasp!): What? Cindy and Sheen? At an action figure convention? You can't be serious!
Libby (she shrugs): Yeah, I know. I have no clue what she sees in him, but if he makes her happy, I guess I shouldn't be one to judge.
Jimmy (a smidge of jealousy): Th..this is ludicrous! Why would they be off somewhere together? They have absolutely nothing in common! (He pauses nervously.) Uh, that is, I wouldn't want Sheen to be in mortal danger of Vortex's quick temper, is what I'm saying. Not that I care that Cindy is with him alone or anything.
(Jimmy laughs nervously as Carl and Libby look at him with perplexion.)
Carl: You sure are acting weird today, Jimmy. You should start thinking of seeing some kind of doctor.
Libby: Or a therapist, maybe some of your experiments have caused distortions in your memory banks, or whatever.
Carl (to Libby): Maybe its best we leave him be.
Libby (she nods): Yeah. (She looks to Jimmy.) We'll let you have some space Jimmy. Later.
(The two begin to depart, still holding hands so amicably. Jimmy stares unblinking at the scene.)
Carl: Until then, I can serenade to you until the store opens: (He begins to sing.) Oh Yoshimi, they don't believe me! But you won't let those robots defeat me, Oh Yoshimi-!
Libby (thoughtfully): I'm impressed by your persistence, but it takes more than singing Flaming Lips lyrics to woo a lady.
Carl (sounding a tad hurt): What? Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots is totally enough to woo a lady, you don't know what you're talking about. How can you say that after it worked so well last time?
Libby (she smiles & stifles some laughter): I didn't say to stop did I?
Carl: Oh, okay. (He starts to sing again.)'Cause she knows that it'd be tragic if those evil robots win! I know she can beat them - Oh Yoshimi!
(Jimmy stares as his friends carry on down the parkway, still holding each others hands in such happy innocence while Libby leans her head on Carl's shoulder. Jimmy's puzzled look speaks for itself of this odd, random display of puppy love. He jerks his head as he remembers Carl's past statement.)
Jimmy: I've gotta find Cindy and Sheen. Fast.
(Jimmy takes off running; no doubt onward to Cindy and Sheen's present location.)
(CUT To EXT Shot - Sheen and Cindy are walking very close to each other on a downtown street. Sheen is wearing his Ultra Lord mask and Cindy is holding a paper shopping bag. She looks to him warmly.)
Cindy: Thanks again for those chocolate covered coffee beans, Sheen. Who knew such caffeine enriched treats could be so fine and delicious.
Sheen (he grins): Fine chocolates for a fine lady.
(Cindy titters and hooks an arm around Sheen's.)
Cindy: Heh, Ultra-Smooth should be added to my growing list of pet names for you.
Sheen: You know I do that kind of stuff for only one. (He glances at the bag she's carrying.) So, have you decided what costume you'll wear? Either Ultra Lady or Sinister Villainess Number Twelve?
Cindy (she grins): Depends on what you're lookin' for sailor.
Sheen (he flips his mask so it rests on the top of his head): Oh-ho! The girl has brass!
(They laugh happily together, eyes to each other as dreamy smiles cross their faces.)
Jimmy (off camera): Cindy! Sheen!
(They cease walking to turn around to see Jimmy rushing toward them. Cindy frowns with disapproval.)
Cindy: Oh great, what does that freak Neutron want?
Sheen (reassuringly): Lighten up, maybe it isn't what you think. (He turns to Jimmy. His voice suddenly loud with frustration.) Hey Jimmy, take off! Can't you see it's special time for me and Cindy, here? I mean, really!
(Jimmy skids to a stop near his friends.)
Jimmy: What? Sheen, Cindy can't stand you, what has possessed you into actually taking her out to an action figure convention?
Sheen: Woa, dude. I think you need to slow down cause all I hear is crazy coming from your mouth. Everyone knows Cindy always encourages the hobby of my unhealthy infatuation with Ultra Lord.
Jimmy: No, she doesn't! Libby does that for you, which I might add, is presently attending a CD signing for some obscure Indie bands, no one has ever head of, with Carl.
Sheen (unaffected): So?
Cindy: Yeah, they've been going out for awhile. What's the deal with you Spewtron, are you just playing dumb or are you suffering from brain hemorrhaging?
Jimmy (in demanding volume): What is with everybody today? Sheen and Libby are supposed to be together talking about action figures and the joys of music, both mass produced and low key! Cindy and I are the...! (He pauses. Reluctance crosses his face.) That is .. ah..
Cindy (totally confused): What are you trying to say Nerdtron?
Jimmy: Oh heck, fine, I'll say it. (He looks Cindy in the eye.) You and I are supposed to be together! You're competitive character and bright insights complement with my intelligent and inquisitive personality, at times it may seem we hate each other but we secretly hold a great respect for...
Cindy: Woa, woa, hold it there. I think I see what you mean here.
Jimmy (relieved): You do?
Cindy (defensively): Yeah! This is another scheme for you to bug my mom again, isn't it?
Jimmy (completely lost): What?
Sheen (to Cindy): I thought your mom put a restraining order on him.
Cindy: She did, but he still hangs around the yard when she's home from work.
Jimmy (at a total loss of words): This..this is completely absurd! Carl's the one who has an infatuated crush on my mother! How can all this be happening? It..it's as if our realities have been scrambled by some unknown power.
Sheen: Okay, Jimmy's insane babbling is starting to be as exciting as watching the ocean evaporate, let's get going before they start airing those cool seizure inducing prototype toy commercials from Japan .
(Cindy rehooks her arm around Sheen as they start to walk onward to the convention.)
Cindy: Way ahead of you. (She looks over her shoulder to Jimmy.) If you want to keep all of your vital organs Neutron, you'd better stay away from my mom!
(Cindy and Sheen disappear from sight. Jimmy can only stand there in motionless shock.)
Jimmy (he yells to the streets): This is all wrong! You hear me! It's all wrong! Doesn't anybody realize that everything that's happening is completely out of order? What unknown monstrosity has twisted the planes of normal reality with such aimless chaos?
(CUT To INT Shot - Inside The Palace Room of Yolkus. King Goobot is reading a newspaper -GOOBOT BANS EARTH PRODUCED MOVIES : "NO ONE LIKES THEM ANYWAY", STATES WAY AWESOME AND "WITH IT" DICTATOR, is the front page article- his quiet time is interrupted by Ooblar, who zips toward him with excited glee.)
Ooblar: Sire! Oh, you will never guess what I have done!
King Goobot (eyes still on the paper): I think whatever you have to say, Ooblar, it should remain unsaid indefinitely.
Ooblar (cheerful): I wrote some fanfiction!
(King Goobot cocks a tired eye at his associate. He lowers his newspaper.)
King Goobot: What?
Ooblar (bubbly): I know! It's quite interesting, if I do say so myself.
King Goobot (he sighs): Ooblar, most fanfiction has characters from television and movies acting implausibly in unlikely situations. (He pauses as he looks at him.) I take yours fits that description to a T.
Ooblar (teasingly): Perhaps! There are quite a few unexpected twists and revelations in my exciting non-canon tale of suspense.
King Goobot (annoyed): I don't see how anyone can like the idea of uneducated amateurs mangling with their beloved characters. Surely the producers and writers must be disgusted of how anyone can just tinker and manipulate with their creations with the incoherent writing experience of a grammatically deficient fourteen year old.
Ooblar: Many find it to be a great beginners course into finding their own creativity, actually.
King Goobot (dryly): Of course it does. (He returns to his paper.) So, what show is it about?
Ooblar: Oh its not based on a show, sire. It's actually about (he waves his hands in a happy gesture) -surprise!- Neutron's colleagues. Particularly Sheen/Cindy and Carl/Libby pairing.
(King Goobot lowers his paper once again. Staring at Ooblar with disturbed annoyance.)
King Goobot (in low disgust): You didn't.
Ooblar (proudly): Indeed I did, good sir! Sheen and Cindy have a grand old time at an action figure convention despite an awkward moment with Neutron. They then sneak onto the school grounds at night and toilet paper the playground, and hold hands under dreamy starlight.
King Goobot: Stop..
Ooblar: Meanwhile, Carl and Libby enjoy a day of hip music and llama watching. They end up finishing the day by going to Retro Land, when the ferris wheel they're riding on becomes stuck they reminisce of the moments they first met and appreciated past experiencesof their company, enjoying the alone time while two hundred feet in the air.
(Ooblar leans in toward King Goobot, fidgety joy in both his eyes and voice.)
Ooblar (in a loud excited whisper): They totally kiss in my story!
(King Goobot is speechless at Ooblar's declaration of such blatant absurdity. He folds his paper.)
King Goobot (in revelation): Well, I guess I know what I'm going to haggle with those Bargozians after all!
Ooblar (he claps his hands in a delighted fashion): Oh! Am I going on another trip again?
(CUT To INT Shot - Back in the Neutron living room. Hugh frowns at Ooblar's fanfic he has been reading on the laptop.)
Hugh Neutron (confused): Man, people are always kissing in fanfiction! What's up with that anyway?
(Hugh sighs as he closes the laptop swiftly. Arising from the couch to head out of the house.)
Hugh Neutron (determined): I think I need to get back to doing my own brainstorming.
(CUE Rotating Atom)