Chapter 3

No, I don't want to know your name, but I suppose you're going to tell me anyway.

Hi again, what's up? Oh you're reading my newest chapter? How kind of you, except, if you don't review. That would be MOST unkind. To have read but not bothered to acknowledge the fact that you read it is near insulting! Okay, so I won't be insulted if you don't review, but I will be bothered, and disappointed. Be cool, read and review.

Perhaps this man thinks I am someone who enjoys a nice chat, perhaps he doesn't realize what it means to be a thief… perhaps he's just dumb. Either way, I hope he likes rejection, because that's what he is headed for.

The rogue was not happy about being asked to tell his life story. And bitterness rang through his voice as very vaguely described a small portion of his past.

"My story?" Crunk raised his eyebrows at Jhosper who didn't seem to take the subtle hint.

"Yes, of course. If were going to work together, I would most like to know where you come from."

"What makes you so sure I will do this for you?

The cleric laughed, "In all my years I have never known a dwarf to pass up his treasure, especially not one who makes a living out of stealing it."

Of course the holy snob was right. He would do just about anything to get back the things he stole, to say nothing of the dirk. But he still didn't like the fact that the cleric was so sure of himself. "If we are going to work together, I think one thing must be understood. I don't like most people, especially people who overtly dance in their self-confidence. The more you tell me what you know I'm going to do, the much less likely it is I'm going to do what it is you want. If we intend to be a cooperative and successful team, you are going to have to assume that I have no problem leaving at any minute. Its just the way I work, and if you want my skills, it's a package deal."

Jhosper chuckled to himself and replied, "very well master dwarf, if it is silence you expect from me than so be it. And I believe my friends will give you the same general courtesy. On the subject of my friends, I think it is about time we go and meet them, so we can commence our plan with the utmost speed. I know you are probably kind of upset that I'm just ushering you along on my crazy plot, but your going to have to deal with it for a little while longer. And one more thing, the road to where we are to meet is guarded by people that do not welcome us, so… just… don't let your guard down.

Of course, thought Crunk, all we have to do is meet a couple of long time pals, but wonder of wonders someone is trying to kill us along the way. I suppose I should expect it.

After a quick look at a map to describe their route, Crunk and Jhosper begin to arm themselves. Jhosper took an average sized but pristine looking mace. He also donned a quiver of arrows with most violent red arrowheads.

Crunk gestured at the arrowheads and asked "sure they look good, buts why make them red?"

"Flame spell" Jhosper replied matter of factly, "does a lot of damage once it's embedded in something"

"Now you have to give my weapon back." Crunk said with a hint of anticipation.

"True enough… but I hid all that in town, so we will have to make a quick stop there before we head out.

A quick hike led them from the cabin into a local village. On the outskirts many abandon houses sat decaying, but providing shelter those in poverty. The geometric design of the houses spoke of very dwarven influenced architecture. It was inside one of these houses that Crunk's precious dirk lie. The treasure he had stolen, Jhosper explained, was hidden somewhere else. Crunk thought of commenting that if his dirk had not been found he would have killed the man as he stood, but thought that it wasn't necessary to anger his guide just to prove a point. Continuing through the city Crunk noticed that the dwarven influence continued throughout the city, but there was also a great deal of elven structure too. Crunk speculated that the city had been under control of three different races at different times, elven, dwarven, and human, and in that order it seemed.

They stopped at an armory to repair some of the old armor the Jhosper was wearing. Crunk convinced the cleric to buy a new pair of sais and a throwing knife considering Jhosper had his money still hidden.

Now fully armed they quickly passed through the rest of the village. Eventually coming to a rough path leading deep into a foreboding forest. The trees were thick and twisted, with leaves of the deepest green, ranging from thin like willow to broad as oak.

"We're to meet in a cabin a couple miles into the wood. One of my companions is already there, the other will arrive shortly" he added flatly, "hopefully."

Without another word they begin to trek down the path. The dense cover of forest blocked out much of the sun and the path slowly became more overgrown. And then, as if out of nowhere, it seemed the forest ended. They had ducked underneath a low branch and stood back to reveal a large clearing in the forest, with a sparse population of much smaller trees. Dead center of this clearing stood a rotting house looking nothing like the dwarf houses from before. This was full elven, but very old, and with crude human repairs. It was a hideous mix of style and practicality, which only fought each other for dominance of the eye, rather then blending together. To an artist the house was a nightmare, but unbeknownst to Crunk, it was home sweet home to someone far too uncivilized to care. As they walked past, Crunk stared at it with morbid captivation. Just as he finally turned his head to observe the path in front of him, the front door burst open to reveal a man wielding a club, and a look of someone who was just naturally violent.

The barbarianorc had a hint ofhuman in his face, as if some where a few generations ago anhuman had been bred with. He yelled in rage.

"WHAT THE HEEEEAALLLLL ARE YOU DOIN BY MY LAND!" His voice sounded like gravel on tin and had a distinct drawl to it.

"Just ignore him, he may leave us alone." Jhosper said in a hushed voice. Crunk continued walking and ignored the orc-man's threats.

"YOU COME BACK HERE SO I CAN RIP YOU APART!" he said.

As annoying as the man was Crunk didn't so much as give a thought to retaliation. That was of course until the barbarian grabbed a rock the size of a child's fist and whipped a poorly aimed shot at Crunk. It caught him on the right shoulder, and he whipped around with fire in his eyes.

"Not wise you barbaric oaf!" Crunk said with anger, and removing a throwing knife from its sheath, he let it fly at the creature's head. Unfortunately he was out of practice and instead of scoring a killing blow, the knife left a large gash between his nose and cheek.

Furious, the barbarian charged at Crunk, crossing the distance between them in a few seconds. But big charging idiots were dispatched by Crunk as easy as fish in a barrel. He readied himself for the attack, and watched as the man raised his club. Just before impact he faked as though he were raising his arms to block the blow. Then he dived straight into the monster's legs. He went down, flailing and howling. Crunk was the first to recover, and he threw his legs around while unsheathing his dirk. As fast as he could he could another stab into the orc's leg muscle. The orc-man let out a scream of rage and kicked Crunk backward, He came out of the roll and popped up to his feet ready to draw a sai and finish the fight, but it proved unnecessary. Jhosper had already drawn his mace, and finished he beast with a crack to the head.

" Cherry picker." Crunk quipped.

" Heads up, he's a papa." Jhosper said looking back toward the house. The orc man seemed to have a whole idiot family, complete with orc children and an orc wife.

"These people are ugly as sin." The dwarf muttered.

Four orclings charged forward just as dumbly as their father. Crunk quickly plucked his throwing knife from the father and plugged the nearest one in the head from a short distance. A lightning throw of his dirk fell the second. The third was in melee distance of Crunk and he fell to two slashes and a stab of the double sais. The fourth hesitated at the sight of his fallen siblings, and was punished with two perfect holes in his chest.

Jhosper looked on slightly disturbed. "You're quite efficient," he said, giving away a hint of shock. But he quickly turned his thoughts to the mama, who howled with rage and tossed a broken branch that had lay on the porch at them. Jhosper easily deflected it and charged the beast.

She took a swing at him, but he only broke the punch with a swing of his mace, which mauled and broke her arm. Another strike to the stomach sent her to the ground, and two more full downward swings killed her with two sickening thuds.

"That was… messy," Crunk said, taking in awe the gruesome scene that they had caused.

"Barbarians," Jhosper replied, "a sad existence they lead. I think it best if we just leave all of us this behind us."

"Agreed" replied Crunk quietly as usual, and the softly began treading down the same path, not looking back.

Hey, no body said these were good people, even if they are the hero. Btw, I had a plotline for chapter three figured out in my head (you know, the one set a couple hundred days in the future), but it turns out, I don't want to do it. So I'm juts gonna delete that chapter. That's right, bye-bye plotline. Anyway, thanks for reading, let me know what you think. C-ya.