Chapter 11- Olivia, I'm so Sorry
Thanks to onetreefan, mstang.gurl, SVUCHiCA48, obessedwithstabler, and belladonna1361 for their reviews yet again! Also special thanks to a certain someone who's my inspiration for life, who is only going to be known as for now, Sergeant Happy Bunny.
Disclaimer: Own nothing.
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Olivia sat outside the ER with her face buried in her hands. She hadn't heard a word about Elliot's condition, since he went into surgery. She fought back tears. He was still hanging in there and she wouldn't condemn him by crying or fearing for the worse. She looked up to find Cragen walking toward her only to be stopped by Jackson. Then she remembered. In all the chaos and her worry for Elliot, she had forgotten about Alex. She stood up when the men came in her direction. "Captain, how's…." her voice trailed off when she saw Cragen's grim expression and Jackson looked like he had been crying. Olivia felt her heart hit the floor with a thud. Alex couldn't be dead. She couldn't. She had survived being gunned down before. She had survived hell in the WPP and came back with more confidence and a successful career, a single shot couldn't have ended her life. Olivia didn't want to believe it.
Jackson felt even more pain at the sight of the white washed walls of the hospital. It killed him to know that Alex hadn't even made it there. She didn't even have a chance of survival. The bullet had killed her the moment it hit her square in the chest. It had punctured her heart and she had died before she even hit the ground. He couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe that only a few days ago, all they were worried about was moving in and unpacking. Now everything seemed to be slipping from him. You don't know how much you treasure something until it's gone. He thought as a tear moved down his cheek. She was gone. The love of his life was gone and he had never had a chance to make things right between them or did he have a chance to tell her the depth of his true feelings for her. Now she'll never know. He concluded with a heart wrenching thought.
Casey rushed into the ER waiting room in tears. She had been the one to see the paramedics cover Alex's body with that dreaded black tarp. It should've been her. She was the one who insisted on prosecuting the case. Alex was only there to mentor her in the biggest case of her career. She spotted Cragen, Jackson, and Olivia. Casey took a deep breath and dried her eyes. She had to be strong for Olivia. Elliot had to pull through. The squad couldn't take anymore losses and Munch's condition was still unknown. She draped an arm around Olivia. "He'll pull through Liv." She soothed. "He's strong." Olivia nodded, trying desperately to cling onto any hope of Elliot surviving.
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Munch and Fin were down the hall in another room. Luckily, Munch only had a minor wound. The bullet had grazed him barely…on the behind. Fin helped him out of the room after Munch had an argument with the doctors about putting him on sedative. "Trust them to put me under sedation. I bet they'll take the chance to steal my social security number or something." He grumbled. Fin smacked himself in the head. The two arrived in the ER waiting room to find everyone already there. Casey was the first to Munch's side and she gave him a hug. "Thank goodness you're alright." She said relieved. Munch muttered a few things. Cragen raised his eyebrows. Munch rolled his eyes and turned to show them his butt. "Great, now I'm a pain in my own ass." He complained, which brought a soft laugh from everyone, even Olivia. Casey gave his hand a squeeze and said softly. "Thanks we needed that." He nodded. Then he and Fin left to get some coffee for the rest of the squad.
Olivia and Casey were left alone with Jackson after Cragen left to do paperwork for the deceased shooter. Jackson hadn't laughed at Munch's joke and Olivia knew why. While she still had hope of Elliot's survival, Jackson's was all gone. Alex was dead and nothing would bring her back. "hey…" she reached out toward him, trying to comfort him. He pulled away. Casey tried as well. "Jackson, we're really sorry. We loved her too." She said gently. Jackson slammed his fist into the wall, making them all jump. "You guys don't understand." He raged. "She was all I had. I don't have any family left and after I broke up with my last girlfriend I hadn't dated in years because I was afraid to get hurt. She healed that. She fixed me! Now she's gone and I can't do anything to bring her back. I should've been there. It's all my fault." Olivia tried to calm him down. "No it's not." She said softly. Jackson grew deathly quiet. "It is Olivia. I was supposed to be there this morning. I was supposed to cover the story, but I didn't. Now I never got a chance to say good-bye." He whispered with a dry sob. With that he left the room.
Olivia and Casey glanced in each other's direction. Olivia wanted to worry and grieve for Alex, but she couldn't. Not with Elliot's life on the line. He was her main priority. She loved Alex and would miss her dearly, but she couldn't let herself grieve while Elliot's life was still hanging in the balance. Olivia stared at the doors that kept her from the man she loved. She desperately wanted him to pull through.
After a few hours, the surgeon walked out. He gave Olivia a defeated look. He knew them. The detectives had had many victims that he had saved in the past year and they had become close, Elliot and Olivia especially. "Olivia…I'm sorry." He said softly. Olivia let out a strangled cry and rushed past him into the ER. Elliot lay on the table with a blanket covering the wound. She started to cry, a soft whimpering sound. She touched Elliot gently on the hand and trembled when she realized how cold he was. "No…" she whimpered. "Please no…" she buried her face in his neck and sobbed.
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That Munch and the pain in my own ass comment was the idea of obsessedwithstabler. Thanks for the idea! It sure made me laugh. Hope you enjoyed! I'll update soon.