Disclaimer: It's only a knock-off, I swear!
DECEMBER 1st SIXTH YEAR
"I am ZO effing bored," said Scar suddenly. The all the sixth year Gryffindors were sitting in the common room, doing nothing. A rare occurrence of late, actually, as Lily always left a room James entered, for fear of his fellow Marauders.
"As are the rest of us," said Riley.
"I never?" suggested Sirius. Aj groaned.
"Last time we played that, everyone found out that you don't wear boxers on Thursdays, Sirius…"
Scar made a face. "That iz dizguzting!"
"I'll be right back," said James, off to the kitchens. A few minutes later, he returned with seven cans of whipped cream. "Alright, first, Remus, place a charm on everyone so you're forced to tell the truth." The werewolf did so. "Kay, you first Scar."
Scar glanced at Remus and Sirius. They seemed to be fine with her being in the room with James, so far… "I 'ave never worn pink underclothez."
Sirius, Riley, and Peter all took shots from their whipped cream cans.
"I don't even wanna know, Sirius…" said Remus.
"Me next!" said Aj. "I've never walked down a flight of stairs without tripping."
Everyone but Sirius took a shot. He continued next. "I've never worn a bra."
The girls all took shots, rolling their eyes. Remus went on. "I've never gone swimming with the giant squid."
Scar, Riley, and Aj took shots, seeing as a truth or dare game with the other Gryffie girls had gotten slightly out of hand… it had been during the dead of winter… aka, last week.
Peter was next. "I've never gotten higher than a Pathetic on a Transfiguration assignment."
Everyone took a shot, giving Peter strange looks. Riley decided to go next. "I've never wet myself."
Peter took a shot. Everyone looked at him, disgusted. "Ew." Was the only word said, and it came from the three girls simultaneously.
It was James's turn. "I've never given head to a sweat soaked Hipogriff." Everyone stared at him. "What?" he asked innocently.
"If that wasn't the most RANDOM thing in the ENTIRE bloody world…" said Aj.
This continued for about half an hour, some of the comments less G-rated than others. So, as we reenter the story, it's Sirius's turn.
"I've never snogged James."
Scar went sheet white. OH SHIT! NO BLOODY WAY! DAMN YOU SIRIUS! DAAAAAAAAAAAMN YOU! The charm tugged at her, causing her arm to jerk towards her mouth. She fought it, screwing her eyes shut. She had never been so upset to feel gloriously fluffy whipped cream on her tongue.
Scar opened her eyes a tiny bit. Everyone was staring at her. Nononononononono! This isn't happening!
"Um, Scar, I haven't snogged you before…"
"I think the spell's defective," said Sirius. Scar wished she could melt into the ground.
"The spell's not defective, Padfoot," said Remus. He was looking at Scar curiously.
"Well, it's gotta be," reasoned Riley. "If James and Scar haven't snogged, then the spell has to have a glitch."
"Unless," said Sirius. "We're totally missing something here…"
Scar could hear her heart thundering in her ears. "It 'as got to be ze zpell."
"It's not the spell," said Remus. "I can guarantee it."
"Well, then how can you explain this?" asked Aj.
"I still say we're totally missing something here."
"Shut it Padfoot."
"No, I think he's on to something," said Remus.
Scar tried to sound exasperated. "Look, wouldn't Jamez or I know eef you were all mizzing zomezzing?"
"Yes," said Remus calmly. "And I think there's something you're not telling us.
"And I zay zat I am t—" Scar kept moving her mouth, but no sound came out.
"Um, what's wrong with her…?" asked Riley.
"It's the spell," said Remus thoughtfully. "It won't let her lie."
"Well, James, you said you didn't snog Scar, but the spell made Scar take a shot when—" Sirius was cut off by Aj.
"When Sirius said he hadn't snogged James! That's it!"
"What?" asked James and Scar simultaneously.
"Scar's snogged James, but James hasn't snogged Scar!" shouted Remus excitedly.
"H-how's that possible?" asked Scar. She was terrified. They were getting so close. SO close.
"Like this." Remus waved his wand. Judging by their reactions, Scar knew she had been restored back to Lily.
"No," she whispered, putting her head in her hands.
"He snogged Lily. Not Scar."
"Lily!" came James's hoarse voice.
"Jamez…" she started, knowing he was gonna be pissed.
"How could you do this to me! You lied to me… All this time… I've been killing myself over Lily, and here you go and tell me that you're her! I bet everyone else knew… yeah, you must have poured your little bitch's heart out to Sirius and Remus, laughing as you played your sick little games with me. You probably have been snogging half of Hogwarts behind my back while you made me fall in love with your new self!" Lily was crying.
She reached out to him. "Jamez, I—" He struck her hand away, and she sank to her knees in front of him, tears shining on her face, a picture of beautiful sorrow.
"Don't! You're just like the rest of them! All manipulating, selfish, cold-hearted little bitches!" He turned and stalked up the staircase.
Lily turned her hard, pained eyes to Sirius and Remus. "Good God, I do 'ope you are 'appy by now."