Jena bit her lip uneasily and winced. "You honestly don't know?"
"Obviously not!" Atton cried. "Look, I have no idea what this is about, but all this secret stuff is starting to make me crazy. I bet it's not even as big a deal as I'm making it out to be. So could you just please tell me what it is Revan's been hiding from everyone, so I can happily go back to being semi-sane? Can you please do this for me, Jena?"
Jena gazed into his eyes and nervously ran her fingers on the side of his cheek. She took a deep breath. She opened her mouth, hesitated and closed it again, looking extremely uncomfortable. "I really shouldn't be the one telling you this."
Atton, who had tensed up and started bracing himself, dropped his shoulders. "Jena, it's not like there's a big line-up of people outside the cockpit eagerly waiting to tell me. So just do it. Please? For me?"
Jena looked at him skeptically. "All right. But you're not going to like it. Promise you won't get upset, no matter how… unexpected this is?"
Atton closed his eyes. "Sure," he said unconvincingly.
"Yeah, right," Jena said, giggling uneasily. She took his hand in both hers and looked at him seriously. "Atton… Daynn's your son."
The color completely drained from Atton's face, but his features remained unchanged. He stared at her blankly. "He's my… I'm sorry, what did you just say?" he asked, his voice squeaking a little.
Jena looked at Atton sympathetically. "Daynn's your son," she repeated in a gentler voice.
Atton gazed wordlessly at her as the information processed through his brain. His face was very still, save for the occasional blink. Jena, waiting for some sign of life, shifted uncomfortably. Atton's eyes widened with shock and disbelief. "But that… that can't be!" he exclaimed. "How is this even possible? Revan said he was her son!"
"He is," Jena said quietly.
Atton ran his hand through his hair in desperation and suddenly burst into near hysterical laughter. "Right, now I know you're pulling my leg. It's impossible. I certainly never… I mean, I never even saw her face before she came to get me on Nar Shaddaa, much less any other part of…" He shook his head violently.
Jena put her hand on Atton's shoulder. She tried to look sympathetic, despite a sudden and inappropriate urge to smirk. "Apparently you were drunk. Very drunk. That's what she told me."
"Well see now that, I can believe," replied Atton desperately. He covered his eyes with his hand for a moment. His hand slid down and revealed an air of cold fury. "She knew about this… and told you… and probably Carth by now… but not me?"
"She knew, yes… that is, she knew she slept with one of her Jedi assassins, one named Jaq Rand… I never told her you and Jaq were the same person. I knew she wouldn't let me go if I was going to look for your child. As for telling you, I had assumed she told you when… she recognized you…" Her voice trailed off.
"No," Atton responded, fuming. "No, she most certainly did NOT."
He very quickly got up and reached for his robe. "Atton, don't…" pleaded Jena, vainly reaching for him in an effort to keep him from leaving. "I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't even have told you…"
He turned brusquely and glared at Jena. "Oh, is that what you think? You wanted to keep me in the dark too? Lie to me like Revan's been doing for weeks?"
"Atton, that's not…" began Jena pitifully.
"Sure it is!" snapped Atton. "If you really wanted me to know, wouldn't you have told me when I first saw you? 'Atton, I haven't seen you in a year and a half. I missed you. By the way, this is Daynn, your son.'" He furiously dressed himself. " Or you could at least have told me when you first got to the cockpit."
Jena pursed her lips and lost her temper. "Oh I'm sorry, how silly of me to think you'd prefer we took our clothes off, rather than have me announce the fact that you had a child with someone else, a fact I thought you already knew."
Atton rudely brushed her off. "You know what, I'll deal with that later. Right now I have a bone to pick with the Dark Lord." He spun around quickly, and before Jena had a chance to say anything else, or even put her clothes on, he was out the door. "REVAN!" he bellowed.
"Atton, for Force's sake…" mumbled Jena, reaching for her tunic.
The first thing Atton noticed as he stepped away from the cargo hold, leaving Revan and Carth to their own devices, was the fact that the medical room door was open. As he walked past, he peered in as casually as he could. It was empty. He vaguely wondered where Mical had disappeared to, but decided he had better things to worry about than the whereabouts of his would-be rival. He had stayed with Revan far longer than he had anticipated, and he desperately needed to see Jena—to know that she wasn't angry with him for lashing out at her and for disappearing for so long, and to verify that she was in fact comfortable with the idea of him suddenly sharing a child with one of her friends. Force knows I'm sure not… It's insane. This whole situation is insane. It's like something out of some trashy romance fiction. He shook his head. I can't believe I talked to Revan for over an hour. I've never even been around her for that long unless some kind of sparring was involved. Always thought I'd be likely to kill her if I spent more than thirty minutes with her. Guess you learn something new everyday. For instance, today I also learned that I'm incredibly stupid when I'm drunk.
The cockpit was the first place he thought of checking for Jena. He poked his head in and immediately saw that the only person occupying the room was Bao-Dur, who was deeply engrossed in admiring the wiring behind one of the wall panels. Did you really think she'd just sit around waiting for you after the way you treated her? He shook his head as he backed out of the room. It would be a lot easier to figure out where she is if I could feel our bond. This planet is absolutely ridiculous. I can sometimes feel the Force aboard the Hawk, and sometimes not. Well, guess I'll go from portside to starboard. Ship's not that big. Can't be that hard to find her. He immediately aimed for the portside room. He quickly peered around the corner and stopped. Jena sat on one of the beds with her back up against the wall. Lying down on the bed next to her and with his head on her lap was Daynn, fast asleep. Jena's eyes were closed and she was very gently running her fingers through his hair, a faint smile on her lips. Atton paused and looked at her for a few seconds. Remorse over the way he had unfairly snapped at her overcame him. He shut his eyes and felt a slight disgust with himself. I keep doing that to her. It's a wonder she still wants me around. I'm such a jerk. She didn't deserve what I said. He hung his head and quietly turned around.
"Atton!"
The whisper called him from within the dormitory. He stepped in the room again. Jena still sat on the bed, but was now looking up at him inquisitively. Atton hurried over to her, sat on the bed and took her free hand in his.
"Jena, I'm so sorry…" he began earnestly. She shook her head indulgently, and put her finger on his lips and silently pointed at the sleeping Daynn. She gestured for them to get up. She shifted her weight, and Daynn squirmed in his sleep. Jena raised an eyebrow, stopped, and proceeded to get up more cautiously, carefully resting Daynn's head on a pillow the instant she slid out from underneath him. She took Atton's hand in hers and they quietly slipped out of the room.
"Let's go outside," she muttered. "I'm tired of being cooped up in here." Atton acquiesced and they headed down the exit ramp. Still holding on to Atton's hand, Jena led him to the forest. "There," she said as they disappeared behind the trees. "We'll be fine here and I can finally hear myself think." She exhaled happily. "It's weird being back on a ship during the day. I've gotten used to this planet, and I have to say, I rather like it."
"You like it?" asked Atton incredulously. "But… you can't feel the Force on most of its surface!"
"I know…" muttered Jena, glancing away. "That's why I like it." Atton frowned confusedly. "It helps me forget who I am," she added.
Atton grew worried. He reached over, gently pulled her face back toward him, gazed into her eyes, and said in earnest, "Jena, what did they do to you out there?"
Jena laughed nervously and a little bitterly. "Nobody did anything to me. I'm just… tired—tired of hiding and of fighting and of protecting. I just want to sleep for days." She sighed. "And I'm tired of those bloody Sith tracking me down wherever I go. This is why I like it here—because if I can't feel the Force, then they can't find me either. I almost wish I had known about this place last time I was running from the Sith. The vornskrs have been a bit of a pain, but they usually only come out at night, and I've killed most of the ones in the area. Daynn and I have been hiding out here for the past month."
"For a month?" Atton blurted. "But what were you planning on doing? Hide out here forever?"
Jena smiled wistfully and caressed his face. "Not without you, I wasn't."
Atton grinned coyly. "Shall I take it to mean that you're forgiving me for being a jerk earlier?"
Jena smiled coquettishly, grabbed a handful of Atton's robe and pulled his face down toward hers. He grinned and kissed her sweetly, tenderly, wrapping his arms around her. Jena chuckled gleefully and eagerly responded to his kiss, cradling his face between her hands. Atton nibbled gently on her bottom lip and backed away a little. "So," he said with a lascivious leer, "how dense is this forest? I mean, do you think anybody can see us from the ship?" One of his hands slipped down to her waist and gently tugged at her tunic.
Jena burst out laughing. "What, again? Are you always this lecherous? I don't remember you being quite this bad…"
"Hey, it's been a year and a half…" Atton responded, moving in toward her lips again. "We have to make up for lost time, master…" Upon hearing that word, Jena pulled back from him slightly.
"You realize I probably shouldn't continue on being your master. I think our other more… personal relationship might interfere with your training. Mira was telling me that Revan took you on as her padawan… Maybe you should stick with her as master."
Atton quieted her down with a fervent kiss. "That's fine…" he muttered as his lips slowly worked their way to her neck. "You do realize that right now I'd agree to anything you asked, right?"
"I had an inkling," she said, grinning, one of her hands dropping down to his belt.
"Jena?" asked a clear voice behind Atton. Jena's hand immediately moved away from Atton's belt, just as Atton let go of her and backed up. He turned and glanced darkly at Daynn, standing behind him. Dammit, kid! You are hell-bent on getting between me and Jena.
"Daynn, sweetie, you shouldn't come out here all by yourself!" exclaimed Jena, running over to the boy. "It's dangerous. Remember what I told you about being out in the woods by yourself."
Daynn sighed lightly. "But I woke up and you were gone," he cried out. "And I can't remember everything."
Atton snorted. Jena and Daynn turned toward him. "Sure you can, kid," Atton stated. "Which rule are we up to? Six?"
"Five," Daynn replied reluctantly.
"See? You do remember," encouraged Atton. "I knew it was five; I was just testing you. Rule five, don't wander off on your own. Though I don't see how that benefits me, really…" Jena gaped at him and stifled a laugh. Atton quickly glanced at her sideways and smirked at the boy. "Here's one that does, though… Rule six, don't interrupt me when I'm kissing Jena."
"Atton!" she protested, laughing. "How do you expect him to remember all this?"
Atton waved a dismissive hand at her. "Don't worry. He remembers. Don't you, squirt?"
Daynn glanced up to the sky and looked pensive. "Rule one, stay out of your head p… perma…"
"Permanently," Atton said helpfully.
"Rule two," Daynn continued, "If you ever use a word I don't understand, don't ask… Rule three… um…" His little face scrunched up thoughtfully for an instant. "No squishing big bugs if you're around… Rule four… don't listen in to conversations you're having, especially with Jena. Five, don't wander off on my own, and six, don't interrupt when you and Jena are kissing."
Jena stared in awe. "I can't believe you managed to get him to remember this much!"
Atton shrugged. "It was nothing… I just did the same thing my dad used to do with me, before he ran out on us. I always remembered the rules… I just ignored them. It's the numbers. Rands are good with numbers." He absent-mindedly reached into his pocket and pulled out his pazaak deck.
Daynn grimaced. "But kissing is gross."
Atton raised a surprised eyebrow and narrowed his eyes. "That must be from Revan's side," he said suspiciously. He started shuffling through his cards. Jena glanced at him in disbelief.
"You're kidding, right? Atton, we're in a forest and you want to play pazaak? You don't need to prove to me you're good with numbers. I know." She chortled.
Atton kept flipping through his cards. "Hold on… I'm just looking for… Ah! Here it is." He held up his plus one, minus one card. "I believe this is yours," he said, grinning and ceremoniously handing the card to Jena.
"It is?" she wondered as she picked up the card and eyed it carefully.
Atton smiled. "Well, I'm not one to give a lady an incomplete present… I found it under the bed a few months ago."
"The bed?" Jena looked perplexed. "Oh! The bed!" She turned a slight tinge of pink as she glanced at Daynn, who was looking up at her quizzically. Without a word, she pulled out her pazaak deck and put the card on top of the others. "Thanks…" she said, before frowning slightly, as she had a closer look at the card. "This one's a lot more worn out than the others," she commented.
Atton glanced away. "Yes, well…" He looked uncomfortable. "I may have carried that card around with me since I found it, and I may have fiddled with it a lot because it reminded me of you…" He stared fixedly at his boots.
Without a word, Jena walked over to him, put her arms around him and kissed his cheek before whispering in his ear, "You are the sweetest man in the galaxy, Atton Rand; you know that?"
Atton smiled awkwardly and sought her lips. He bent down and kissed her softly. Jena returned his affections, but after a few moments opened her eyes and backed away. "Daynn?" she called out, looking around them for the child who had suddenly vanished. Dammit! Stupid Sithspawn!
Atton looked over to the field. "Hey, there he is!" he said, pointing at a figure standing in the middle of the clearing. Jena gasped.
"He can't be out there on his own!" she cried. "It's almost dark!"
"Hold on," Atton said with a smirk. He stretched his hand out and frowned when he noticed Daynn continue walking. "What the…? The stasis field isn't working." He frowned and looked blackly at the trees around him. "Damn stupid lizards!" he growled, eyeing an ysalamir attached to a tree nearby. "Great. Now we're going to have to actually catch up to him." Having a kid isn't as bad as I thought it would be… It's far worse. Jena darted onto the field, while Atton glared at the ysalamir, viciously flicked it on the head, and ran out after her thinking things unlawful to be uttered about Daynn, Revan, and alcohol, in that order.
When he caught up with Jena, she was already crouched down in front of Daynn, evidently in the process of giving him a stern lecture.
"But Atton said not to interrupt when you're kissing," the boy whined.
"Atton is—" Jena began hotly. She stopped and took a deep breath. "That's not a reason to run off like that," she said, correcting herself. She lifted her head, and Atton was looking down at her with a mocking expression.
"No, please," he said with a smirk. "Don't stop on my account. I for one would really like to know what Atton is." She swung at him, unable to repress a smile.
"Shut up!" she said, laughing.
"Yes, master," he replied meekly.
"And stop calling me that!"
"Yes, master."
Still laughing, Jena stood up, firmly holding on to Daynn's hand. She turned to the child. "Daynn, I want you to stay right here. Don't move. I just want to talk to Atton for a minute." Daynn nodded energetically, and Jena let go of his hand. She grabbed hold of Atton's arm and took a few steps with him. "Atton," she said in a low voice, "I think you should tell him."
"Tell him… what?" Atton asked, genuinely perplexed.
"That you're his father!" Jena said in an exasperated whisper.
"Oh. That," he replied blankly. "You mean he doesn't know? …Well, at least I wasn't the only one being kept in the dark, for once. All right, I guess we can do that…"
"I mean I think you should tell him… alone." She looked at Atton and didn't notice a change of expression in his face. "Without me," she insisted.
Atton frowned. "What? Why? I've spent enough time alone with this kid before."
"Atton, he's your son!"
He rolled his eyes dramatically. "Fine, fine, I get it, I get it… I know this is just your way of punishing me for something I did. It has to be." He shook his head. "Fine. I'll go spend time alone with the Sithspawn and explain to him how alcohol is responsible for his existence."
"Atton!" Jena protested.
"I'm kidding! Man, it's like you've forgotten my sense of humor." Atton shook his head, kissed Jena's forehead and turned toward Daynn. "Come on, squirt. Why don't you and me take a walk? There's some stuff we need to talk about."
"Just make it quick… don't go far," muttered Jena, peering ominously at the sky. "And stay away from the forest."
Atton looked confused. "What, now I have to stay away from it? Earlier you told me…"
"Earlier it wasn't getting dark," she said quietly. "The vornskrs don't generally hunt in the day. I wanted you to keep an eye out for them, but I didn't think you'd actually encounter any. You should be okay… Like I said, I killed most of the ones in the area. But we can talk about this later. Just hurry back in."
"Fine." Atton turned to the boy. "Let's go, kid."
Daynn glanced up at him suspiciously. "Will there be more rules?" he asked cautiously.
Atton shrugged. "You don't do anything wrong, you won't get new rules. It's pretty easy, if you think about it."
Daynn pleadingly looked over at Jena, who blew him a kiss and wordlessly encouraged him to follow Atton. Daynn sighed and walked off after the man in the frayed Jedi robe.
"So…" began Atton. "Um… a lot of changes in your life, huh?" What the hell is she thinking? I don't know how to talk to kids! I didn't even when I was one! Daynn glanced up at him, greatly disinterested. There. See? I'm already boring him. Atton desperately peered over his shoulder, only to see Jena quickly disappear aboard the ship. Dammit. I'm really going to have to do this on my own. He put his hand on the back of Daynn's head and led him away from the ship. "Listen, kid," he started awkwardly. "There's something you should probably know. It's about me and… and you and…" Atton looked immensely uncomfortable, and nervously scratched the back of his head. How the hell am I supposed to tell him this when I haven't even grasped the concept myself? "Um… what I mean to say is…" he stammered.
Daynn cocked his head curiously. "Are you trying to tell me you're my dad? Cause I already know that!"
A wave of relief momentarily swept over Atton. He breathed more easily, but his forehead creased a little. Wait a minute… "You're in my head again!" he spat. "Dammit, Daynn!"
"I wasn't!" the child protested. Atton looked skeptical. "I saw it in her head," Daynn added quietly.
Atton still looked unimpressed. "Whose, Jena? Cause that's not any better. You shouldn't—"
"No," Daynn interrupted, speaking even more quietly. "Hers." His hazel eyes peered significantly into Atton's.
"You mean Revan's?" Atton enquired. Daynn nodded, and Atton rolled his eyes. "Why didn't you just say 'mom's' or something, so I'd know who you're talking about?"
The boy mumbled something inaudible.
Atton frowned. "What was that?"
"BECAUSE IT'S WEIRD!" Daynn shouted violently. Atton took a step back from sheer surprise. Daynn's anger faded immediately and he went back to looking demure.
Atton hesitated. "Why… is it weird? I mean, she is your mo—" Atton realized what he was saying. "Oh. Right. You've never had a mother before. Is that why it's weird?"
Daynn shrugged. "Maybe." He glanced away.
Atton got the impression that Daynn wasn't telling him everything, but he wisely decided not to push the topic. He changed his intonation, and sounded a lot more upbeat. "Well, that's good, I guess… because I don't think I'm ready to be called… uh…" He coughed. "'Dad'." He swallowed. "I'm already traumatized enough when I talk to you, kid."
"Stop calling me 'kid'," Daynn muttered sullenly.
Atton scoffed. "Well, what the hell else am I going to call you? Because I'm not calling you son or sonny-boy or anything like that."
"My name's Daynn."
"Yeah, but I call everybody 'kid'. Well, everybody but Jena and Rev. Your mother in particular has her own personal collection of nicknames that she has earned throughout the years." Ranging from 'Dark Lord' to 'schutta'.
Daynn's expression became mischievous. "If you call me 'kid', I'll call you 'Dad'."
Atton cringed. That kid's way too smart for his age. "You've got a cruel streak," said Atton, sneering. "You must get that from your mother." And your father.
Daynn's smile faded. "That's not nice," he said ambiguously.
"What's not nice? The fact that I'm implying that your mother has a cruel streak, or the fact that I'm saying you're like her?"
Daynn peered up at Atton seriously. "She killed a lot of people." Atton suddenly felt a little nervous. Of course he knows this… he's been in her head. There's no point in trying to deny it. "She killed a lot more people than you did," the boy muttered.
Atton slowed his pace down to a crawl. He cast a quizzical glance at Daynn; the latter seemed a little cold, detached. "I know," Atton said quietly. "She's done a lot of bad things. To me, even. But she's different, now." He begrudgingly added, "You can trust her." On second thought, it's probably a good thing that I'm here alone with him… Wouldn't want anybody hear me saying nice things about the Dark Lord. I have a reputation to withhold.
"Why do you say that?" Daynn asked curiously. "You don't like her. You only say bad things about her."
Atton shut his eyes and laughed mirthlessly. "Of course I hate her. How could I not?" he muttered bitterly. He sneered and glanced away.
"But you like her, too," said a voice in his head.
"DAYNN!" Atton barked. "Rule. Number. One. I know you remember it, so don't play dumb."
Daynn shrugged. "Yeah, I remember it… I just wanted to know if you were lying."
Atton threw his hands up in the air in exasperation. "Dammit, stop being like me! It's irritating!" He folded his arms and glowered while Daynn looked up at him expectantly, waiting for a confirmation of his allegation, but Atton remained silent. Daynn's eyes narrowed.
"Do you like her more than Jena?" he asked accusingly.
"Why don't you tell me, if you're so smart?" snapped Atton.
Daynn looked at him for a moment. "No, I don't think you do."
"Good looks and a brain," said Atton sarcastically. "Now stop pestering me with questions." He looked down. A very large, very hairy caterpillar was crawling at his feet. He wrinkled his nose. How many of those bloody things are there on this planet? I mean, where are we, Dxun? "There. You like bugs. Play with that stupid thing and leave me alone," he said unpleasantly. "But so help me, if you squish it…"
"Rule number three," chanted Daynn dutifully as he crouched down before the caterpillar. Sure… now he remembers the damn rules. He really is just like I was. No wonder Dad couldn't wait to get away from me. The boy happily started prodding at the caterpillar. Atton shot him an aggravated look, folded his arms, and cleared his throat. Daynn looked up, sighed heavily and stopped poking. Atton smiled importantly. "That's better."
Daynn pursed his lips and his eyes darted back down to the caterpillar, which suddenly and unexpectedly burst open with a pop. Atton stared as one stunned while Daynn's eyes widened and he put his hand to his mouth. "I didn't mean to!" he cried. "It was an accident! I didn't mean to squish him!"
Atton's jaw dropped. "What do you mean, you didn't…? You… you killed that bug without touching it? By accident?" His eyes grew slightly fearful. "Daynn, what did you do?"
Tears started streaming down the child's face. "I'm sorry!" He sniffled. "Please don't tell Jena! She told me not to do that anymore."
"Jena knows you can blow bugs up with your mind?" Atton asked incredulously, taking an involuntary step back. He was horrified. No wonder she was telling me to stay close to the forest earlier. What the hell have Revan and I done
"I wasn't t-trying to blow h-him up. You t-told me n-not to s-squish bugs," protested Daynn, hiccoughing badly.
Atton stared at Daynn through wide eyes. "Well, I guess it's a damn good thing I did, otherwise I don't even want to think about what you'd have done to this caterpillar!"
The child started wailing. Not knowing what to do, Atton ran over to him and knelt down next to him. "Hey, hey… It's okay…" he said, trying to sound as soothing as possible. "We'll figure this out. We'll fix this. We'll"—he glanced down at the caterpillar guts—"we'll… Well, I guess we can't exactly patch him up…" He laughed sardonically and Daynn's lip quivered. "Don't!" added Atton in a panic. "Don't cry. I don't know what to do with people who cry. Just ask your mother!" He nervously ran his hand through his hair. I really need Jena here. Right now.
An odd sound from behind him caused him to turn around—a strange, cackle-purr like sound. In one swift move, he got up, drew his lightsaber, and stood protectively between Daynn and the four snarling creatures before him. Vornskrs, he thought, his heart beating savagely in his chest. Without hesitating, he immediately struck one down, but another lunged at him, whipping its tail, which he chopped off with a swift wrist movement before it touched him. The animal yelped and took a few steps back, growling at him, while the other two looked ready to attack. He Force pushed one of them and cleaved through the other as it charged with its mouth open. He glanced at one vornskr, then at the other, trying to determine which one would attack him next; they both did at once. The tailless one snapped at him and he managed to kick it in the face as he swung his lightsaber at the other one to try and prevent it from reaching Daynn.
"Go hide, Daynn!" he ordered. "Get away from here!" The vornskr jumped and collided with him, knocking his lightsaber hilt against his mouth. He pushed the creature back and managed to fight it off with great difficulty.
A frightened, tearful voice came from behind him. "But—"
"JUST GO!" yelled Atton, spitting blood from his cut lip. He dove forward and sank his lightsaber into the animal's side. It yelped and fell over, its back legs twitching. Atton quickly glanced over his shoulder to check on Daynn. The boy was running away as quickly as his little legs could carry him. "NO!" bellowed Atton when he realized where Daynn was headed. "Not in the for—AAAAAAUGH!" He felt a sharp pain in his left calf. He turned and faced the tailless vornskr, which was holding on to his leg. "YOU SCHUTTA!" he cried as he plunged his lightsaber into the creature's back. The vornskr cried in agony and let go of Atton's calf as it fell over. Atton could see it was still trying to reach for him, and he struck it down one last time.
Atton wavered and stumbled away from the dead creatures. Vaguely noting that they were indeed all dead, he turned toward the forest and called out loudly.
"DAYNN!"
He cringed as the pain from his leg shot up. He tripped as he took another step and realized that everything around him had become dark—much too dark. He attempted another step and everything went completely black as he collapsed to the ground.