Disclaimer: I'm not J.R.R. Tolkien, I'm not J.K. Rowling, But I write from the heart, from the heart.
Summery: Because she's Hermione Granger and she hates secrets. Because she's too smart for her own good. Because even she has a mischeif side. Surprises never end in the realm of Weasley.
Bata: Beankin'– I thank you so very much for that.
Mad About You – Chapter 6
Artist – Sting. Title – Mad about you. Album – The soul cages.
This is so infuriating! Thought Hermione when she sat in History of Magic class, a couple of days after the holidays were over. All around class the students slowly sank into the usual glazed eyes-half asleep mode. To her right, Ron's head was nodding until it finally hit the desk, then he proceeded to nestle it comfortably on his folded arms. To her left, Harry was taking notes. Wait, that can't be right... Harry never took notes in History of Magic. Hermione stole a glance at his parchment and almost sighed in relief. Harry's parchment didn't contain notes about the role of witches and wizards in the wars of the 20th century. Instead it was covered with little drawings of shamrocks in various sizes. A simple charm made them float about the parchment. In the middle of the parchment was a little crude sketch that might not have been very artistic but left very little room for imagination and caused Hermione to blush and avert her eyes. She needed to get to the bottom of this and fast! The past couple of days hadn't been easy for her. Ron wasn't talking to Harry and it felt like fourth year all over again, and Hermione was damned if she was going to pitch in with something like that again. The boys weren't fourteen-years-old anymore and it was about time they started acting their age rather than like two pigheaded idiots, even if it was in fact what they were.
While professor Binns's monotonous voice and the soft breathing of the students were the only sounds in the class, Hermione was making plans; she decided she needed to bring the boys to talk to each other on neutral ground. The library was probably a good place. Getting Harry and Ron there was not a problem but she needed to get Ginny to come too and that was a little trickier.
After lunch Hermione caught up with Ginny at the doors of the Great Hall. She grabbed the redhead's arm and propelled her towards a remote corner. Ginny took one look at Hermione's face and decided it was futile to resist. Besides, she knew why Hermione wanted to talk to her.
"What the hell is going on between you and Harry?" Hermione asked crossly as soon as they where out of earshot. Ginny sighed.
"Nothing, there is nothing going on between Harry and me, not that it's any of your business," she added.
"It is my business when Ron and Harry aren't talking and expect me to act as an emissary!" Ginny looked torn between amusement and anger.
"It's hardly my fault my brother is such an idiot," she pointed out but Hermione was already fed up with the whole situation and was not about to let Ginny distract her from her mission.
"What was the story about you and Harry snogging in the seventh floor then?"
"It was a bloody joke! It meant nothing!" called Ginny hotly.
"Are you sure?" Hermione looked sceptical and Ginny gave her a questioning look.
"Harry didn't tell you?"
"Tell me what?" Ginny looked uncomfortable, like she was trying to decide whose trust to betray by telling Hermione the truth.
"I can't really discuss it if Harry didn't say anything, I'm sorry," she finally reached a decision.
"What the fuck is going on here?" Hermione called out in frustration. Ginny looked up in alarm; it was the first time she heard Hermione curse like that.
"Look, Ginny, I'm bored with this little game. I want you to come to the library tonight and explain the whole matter to Ron before things get really out of hand. Be there after dinner," she said and turned to leave, not even waiting for Ginny's reply.
After dinner Hermione made her way to the library. When she rounded the corner she found Harry was already there, he was standing by the library door talking to Seamus. He nudged Seamus when he saw her and the two of them blushed as if she had caught them doing something naughty. As she approached them Seamus said cheerfully,
"Hello, Hermione, how are you doing? I'm only here to return a book, nothing suspicious about it." Harry tried to remain casual while elbowing Seamus to shut him up and smiling at Hermione at the same time. Seamus winced and smiled at Hermione, who looked at both of them through narrowed eyes and felt her anger rising to the surface again. Before she could tackle them, though, they saw Ron rounding one corner of the corridor while Ginny was coming from the other side. When Ron saw the group at the library door an angry look flashed across his face and he turned to leave.
"Ron, wait," called Hermione and at the same time Ginny shouted,
"Ronald Billius Weasley, you stop right there!" Everyone turned to look at her in alarm. She sounded exactly like Mrs. Weasley and that was more than a little scary. Ron turned with an ugly expression on his face, his eyes narrowed and full of disdain. Ginny didn't even give him time to open his mouth. "You are the biggest git I ever had the misfortune to know! Harry and I are not going out together and you would have found out by yourself if you weren't such an idiot and asked! It was meant to be a joke."
"A joke, what are you, Fred and George, with that twisted sense of humour?" Ron spat out and Ginny flushed red with anger to match his colour. Harry grabbed Hermione and Seamus' arms and started to edge along the wall. A Weasley fight was always worth watching but he really didn't want to be there when the hexes started to fly. Hermione had a moment of hesitation; she knew she should probably step in and break the fight, as Head Girl if nothing else. But even the Head Girl wasn't stupid enough to step in between two fighting Weasleys.
"You are not mum or dad and you can't tell me what to do with my life!" shouted Ginny. "You can't tell me who to date!"
"The hell I can, I'm suppose to take care of you, you're my baby sister," Ron shot back, and that sent Ginny over the edge.
"I AM NOT A BABY!"
They both glared at each other for a couple of seconds, measuring each other's anger, and then Ginny gave the tiniest smile and said triumphantly, "I have a right to date any guy I want, just ask Dean." At that Harry tugged at Hermione and Seamus and chivvied them out of the corridor, almost at a run.
They could hear Ron and Ginny shouting at each other behind them for a long while.
Once outside Ron and Ginny's earshot, Hermione let out an anguished cry. "I didn't mean for this to happen..." She looked around her and her gaze fell on Harry and Seamus standing next to each other, and she was suddenly reminded why she called out this disastrous meeting in the first place. "Would either of you care to explain what the hell is going on here?" she asked smoothly. Harry recognized danger where it lay and said hurriedly,
"We had better go find Dean and warn him that Ron is out to get him." He grabbed Seamus, who still looked disappointed at walking away on what promised to be the best fight of the year, and they both left, almost running away from Hermione.
A few corridors away Harry sank to the floor, covering his face in his hands. Seamus leaned on the wall next to him, trying to catch his breath.
"I can't do it! I can't tell them, they are going to hate me," he said without lifting his head, and Seamus looked down at him.
"So, is it over then?" He tried to keep his voice level. Harry's head shot up in alarm.
"No! What are you talking about?" Seamus looked determinedly at the wall opposite him.
"Those are your choices; really... you can't hide from Ron and Hermione forever. We either tell them what's going on or make sure there is nothing to tell." He fought to keep his voice calm even though he was almost falling to pieces inside.
"I don't want this to end," said Harry quietly and Seamus sank to the floor, almost collapsing with relief. He knelt before Harry and smiled.
"Me neither. Damn it, Harry, I've never felt this happy before, so complete, and it's all thanks to you. I don't think I could stay so close to you without being with you." Harry smiled and cupped Seamus' cheek in his hand.
"I couldn't live with you without being with you either. I guess I'll just have to come clean and tell Ron and Hermione the truth." he sighed and Seamus laughed.
"Where is that famous Gryffindor courage? You've faced far worse than that!" he called out.
"You're right. I did face much worse than that! I faced Oliver Wood and McGonagall and Snape!" Seamus laughed again and Harry pulled him close, placing his hand on the Irish boy's chest. He leaned forward and kissed Seamus, but pushed him away before they could let the kiss got too far. They were still sitting in the corridor where any student could pass and see them.
"Well, I'm glad you came to your senses. Now let's go find Dean and warn him of the Weasley danger. We could face said Weasley tomorrow," said Seamus happily.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
As it turned out they didn't face Ron the next day. Or the day after that and Hermione was getting rather impatient that nothing changed. Actually things did change, since Ron forgave Harry and was stubbornly not talking to his sister instead. After about a week Hermione decided she had had enough. She came down to the common room one afternoon to find Harry and Seamus sitting on the sofa talking quietly to each other. They were oblivious to the rest of the room.
Hermione smiled to herself, pointed her wand to her palm and muttered something, and then walked over and dropped behind the sofa's back, causing them both to jump up with alarm.
"Hello boys," she said, smiling broadly.
"What do you want, Hermione?" Harry said gruffly to mask his initial surprise of her appearance.
"I was just wondering if this might be yours. I found it on the floor," she said casually, and held up a little square object.
"Hermione, is that a…?" Harry eyed the thing with an air of dread; Seamus on the other hand was falling in a silent fit of laughter, turning red. Hermione's smile broadened.
"Well, is it yours or not?" Her voice was calm and innocent but there was a wicked glint in her eye.
"Of course it's not ours! What on earth are you talking about?" Harry was getting steadily red in the face and Seamus was observing the scene with great interest as if the whole matter didn't touch him at all.
"Oh, come on Harry, how thick do you think I am! You two have been acting like two giggly first years in love. Even Ron is catching on. Though he seems to completely miss the whole point…" she added almost to herself.
Harry glanced over at Seamus who finally decided to look as embarrassed as he was.
"Look, it's not what you think… We're just… I mean…It's not like…" Seamus was fumbling for words and Harry decided that honesty was the best policy, and besides he knew this was his best chance to get things out in the open.
"Moine, it's exactly what you think it is," he informed her and she beamed with pride at her own power of deduction. "But this is not ours." He took the condom from her hand and cursed himself for getting even redder than before. He really didn't want to discuss the finer points of his relationship with Seamus, especially not with her.
"Where did you get that anyway?" Seamus asked, taking the condom from Harry and examining it.
"I didn't get it anywhere. I conjured it. I wanted to find out what's going on. Shock treatment seemed to be the easiest way to do it," she said cheerfully and couldn't hide her smile at the look on both their faces.
Seamus smiled back at her and nodded his head, muttering "Cheeky tart" under his breath.
At that moment Ron stepped from behind Hermione, slipping his arm around her waist and looking over her shoulder. Hermione stifled a surprised cry and was about to scold Ron for sneaking up behind her when he spotted the condom in Seamus' hand.
"What's that?" he asked curiously and reached for it. Harry tried to grab it first but failed. Ron examined it with interest. "What's that?" he asked again. Hermione gave Harry and Seamus a wink and explained to Ron,
"It's a muggle device to prevent pregnancy or genital diseases," Ron, surprisingly enough, didn't turn red. He was looking at the small square from all angles, obviously trying to figure out how to use the contraption, when Hermione stepped in and explained. Now Ron was getting very red indeed, and he soon matched Harry and Seamus' face colour. He quickly dropped the condom and Seamus caught it and made it disappear with a flick of his wand. He lifted his eyes to see Hermione and Harry in the middle of an animated discussion, using only their eyes and tilting their heads. "You should tell him", her eyes said. "I will, when the right time comes" his eyes shot back.
Seamus watched them for a couple of seconds and then turned to Ron.
"Hermione had just found out that Harry and I are having an affair," he said casually and both Harry and Hermione stared up in alarm.
Ron on the other hand looked thoughtful. "Who are you having an affair with?"
Hermione closed her eyes as if in pain and Harry couldn't help but smile, this was so like Ron, you could always depend on him to get things absolutely wrong.
"With each other!" said Seamus loudly but he was smiling, he also knew what Ron was like.
Ron's eyes widened almost to the size of a house-elf's and his jaw dropped. Harry and Seamus tried to avoid his eye and Hermione breathed out with anger. "Oh Ron, don't be daft! How could you not notice?"
"Well, I'm very sorry if I didn't notice that two of my best friends are having a bloody affair right under our noses!"
"We noticed..." Harry pointed out and Ron looked confused while Hermione turned her eyes and looked very embarrassed indeed. "Oh, never mind! I didn't want you to find out like that, but it doesn't matter now."
Harry was suddenly very angry, he wasn't even sure why. It wasn't as if Ron wasn't acting exactly as Harry had predicted, but it still bothered him that he did. That was the reason it took him so long to say anything in the first place.
"How long has this been going on?" Hermione was clearly trying to lighten the atmosphere.
"Since Christmas eve," Seamus told her proudly.
Ron's jaw dropped again. "Merlin! That's almost four bloody weeks!" He looked very offended. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Cause I knew you'd faint when you heard it!" Harry was almost shouting.
"Do I look like I'm about to faint?"
"You do look a little pale," Seamus pointed out but both Harry and Ron ignored him.
"I cannot believe that you do not trust me enough, your best friend, to tell me that you're gay! That's cutting me deep, Harry, deep." Hermione and Seamus exchanged a glance, and Harry had the decency to look embarrassed.
"I'm sorry mate, I should have told you, it's just that… I don't know, I guess I was scared of your reaction, you are my best friend."
Ron smiled. "Well, just for your information, I am perfectly capable of dealing with this sort of news. It's your life after all and you have the right to shag anyone you want." All three of them looked at him like they suspected he was under the Imperius curse. "What?" he asked innocently.
"Nothing, it's just we didn't expect you to take it that well…" Seamus finally found his voice.
"Of course he's going to take it well, he already has some experience, after Charlie brought home his lover during the Christmas holidays and nearly sent mum off to St. Mungo's with a heart attack." everyone turned to look at Ginny's smiling face. Hermione gaped at Ginny voicing the thoughts of all the others.
"Charlie is gay? Dragon-breeding-tough-guy-Charlie is gay?" Ron and Ginny nodded.
"He has a really cute boyfriend too, his name's Matt and he's from Australia," added Ginny. Harry was so busy trying to cope with the shower of information that landed on him, Charlie Weasley being gay and the fact that Ron wasn't having a fit of any sort, that he didn't even noticed the fact that apparently Ron and Ginny were talking again. Harry was still pondering over her words when Neville and Parvati stepped through the portrait hole and joined them.
"What's going on, guys?" said Neville cheerfully to them.
"Well, Harry and I are coming out of the closet," Seamus filled him in dryly. Neville didn't look shocked in the least.
"Good for you," he exclaimed. Harry had given up on actually being surprised by now.
"So, are there any more like you?" asked Ron in a cheerful yet slightly worried voice.
"You mean wizards? Of course there are. They're infesting the corridors." said Seamus and everybody laughed.
"Very funny, Seamus, you know what I mean," said Ron, though he was laughing too.
"Of course there are others, Ron, the statistics show that every tenth person is gay, and there are over a 1000 people in the castle." You could always count on Hermione to provide statistics and know things that others didn't really care about.
"Really?" Ron was impressed. "Mind you, if you take our dormitory as an example the statistics are much higher."
"Nobody is taking your dormitory as an example for anything, Ron," said Ginny dryly and everyone laughed again. "But this is interesting. You guys must know who else is gay around here, come on spill it out." Her eyes were shining in a dangerous way.
"I bet Zacharias Smith is a poof," said Neville.
"Zacharias Smith is an idiot, he's not gay," said Ginny. "Come on guys, you must have former lovers or something."
"Nope," said Seamus. "It's Harry all the way for me, I'm afraid." He smiled fondly at Harry and took his hand.
"What about you, Harry?" asked Hermione casually and Harry looked at her in horror. He'd expected this from Ginny or even Neville but Hermione was always dead against gossip.
"I really don't want to discuss that, it's none of your business," he said with dignity.
Seamus leaned closer to him and whispered in his ear, "Now you've done yourself in." And indeed the faces around Harry all lit up with anticipation. Harry obviously had something to hide and they would find out what it was, or who.
"Ginny, what do you mean your mother almost got a heart attack when she heard about your brother? I always thought your parents were really open minded and all," said Seamus, and Harry gave him a grateful look and squeezed his hand lovingly.
"Oh, she doesn't mind that Charlie's gay, and she loves Matt. The problem was he brought my dad a boomerang as a present and dad managed to ruin all her rose bushes," she explained, and the group exploded with roars of laughter. Mr. Weasley was known for his love for muggle artefacts and his tendency for disasters and they could all picture the scene quite accurately.
"Not to mention he almost ruined Christmas dinner when the bloody thing landed in the middle of mum's special pudding. She was almost purple in the face with rage. Even Fred said he never saw that colour on her, and he should know..." added Ron and the laughter grew louder.
At that moment Dean climbed through the portrait hole, looking very angry indeed.
"What's wrong mate?" asked Seamus and the laughter died as everyone turned to look at Dean.
"Bloody detention with Slughorn. He made me clean all the muck from the sodding supply cupboard. The place was filthy and I had to clean it all with my hands! No magic!" he showed them his hands that were covered in stains in various colours from green to purple, and bore strange marks that looked a bit like bite marks. Hermione examined them carefully and said in an encouraging voice,
"Rub some lemon on them, it should rid you of most of those stains." Dean flashed a weary 'thank you' smile at her.
"So, what were you guys laughing about?"
"We were telling them about the Christmas disaster my dad caused with his new boomerang," explained Ron, but Dean looked even more confused after his explanation.
Ginny sighed. "Our brother Charlie brought his lover Matt to spend Christmas with us and he gave our dad a boomerang." Dean still looked confused and she knew what would be his next question, so she beat him to the punch. "Yes, my brother Charlie, the tough guy who works with dragons, is queer!" She gave Dean a threatening look that clearly challenged him to say anything offensive. Dean hurriedly changed his facial expression to a blank one. Ginny could be very dangerous when provoked, especially when it came to her family.
"That's really great Ginny," Dean swallowed nervously.
"Harry, you didn't answer our question. Who else did you sleep with?" asked Neville clearly to cover Dean's embarrassment, causing Harry to blush again. "We are trying to figure out who else in school is gay," he explained to Dean.
"Why would Harry know who else in school is gay?" asked Dean, and then rethought Neville's last words. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped; he looked just like Ron did a mere half hour ago. All around the group every person was trying to hide a smile except Harry and Seamus who looked at Dean seriously.
Seamus reached out to Dean. "Look mate, it's not such a big deal. I'm sorry we didn't tell you sooner…" Dean hastily drew his hand away.
"What are you talking about?" he asked suspiciously, and Seamus cursed inwardly and took a deep breath.
"Dean, buddy, mate, Harry and I have been going out with each other for four weeks now." His eyes never left Dean's face; he knew this was not going to be easy.
Dean didn't say anything for a long time. Eventually he lifted his chin and looked at Seamus and Harry with narrowed eyes. "You two are…" he fumbled around the last word and couldn't say it.
"We are gay, yes," said Harry helpfully, but Dean's face turned into an ugly mask. Everyone was staring at him, the usually calm, laughing and gentle Dean who looked now like he wanted to pummel Harry and Seamus senseless.
"You two disgust me," he hissed and turned, swiping fast past the others and out the portrait hole. All the common room was now watching the scene with interest. Nobody knew exactly what happened but everyone noticed Dean's dramatic exit.
The group who stood around Seamus and Harry all looked very uncomfortable. "I'm sorry guys," whispered Neville.
"Don't worry Nev, it's not your fault," said Seamus soothingly, but he and Harry both felt very stupid and they both wanted to get the hell out of there. "Well, I guess the fun's over for tonight, time for bed then," he said as lightly as he possibly could and got up. Harry followed him and bade good night to their friends, who murmured good night in return, and they both made their way up to their dorm.