Chapter Eighteen
Interlude One
His friends had not moved from the fence. One of them started to scream, a girl. A girl who called herself Angel. She was slim, showing by her manner of dress that all she wanted was the wrong kind of attention. Dad did not like her. Mom had not been able to control my brother's fancies. And now Zach was laying still, his neck twisted into such a fashion that I knew in an instant that he was not all right.
Angel was still screaming. Damned fool. She was a demon, I silently cursed her and her companions for driving my brother to this. But they hadn't really...he had changed all on his own. My head was swimming as I stared at the shaking body of Talorta who was trying desperately to get up off Zach. I ran to them, some of the boys standing next to Angel doing the same. The sun was shining in a way that was cruel...tormenting. Plaguing us with its brightness. I pulled Talorta up to his feet, his forehead was bleeding and his leg was twisted out.
But I wasn't crying. I was numb with shock. No. This couldn't have happened. A boy was hovering over Zach, the other yelling for my parents...running to the house.
"Zach...Zach...wake up." I let go of Talorta, moving over to the boy' side. His eyes were wide with fear, he looked up at me, jumped, slightly startled. "He's not breathing."
That's because he's dead.
I knew it in a cold, heartless way that was so utterly foreign to me that I was shocked further by it. Angel was still screaming. There were medics now, a vet as well. My brother's body was loaded into an ambulance...Talorta led into the stable. My parents drove to the hospital. But me, I stayed. I stayed by the fence post, looking at the snapped wood, the color of the dark blood which stained the both the wood and the ground dark. I had never seen blood like this before. I had seen wounds, horses in need of stitching. But this blood was different.
For I had never seen the color of death.
I wondered if it felt cold inside his coffin. Could he feel the velvet lining? Would he smell the stench of the earth? Could he hear our voices? No. He couldn't. He wasn't there anymore. His body was only the vacant tomb. Was this death? Knowing that the person whom you loved was no longer there? The person only a tomb? If so, Zach had been dead for a long time. He looked peaceful in the coffin as they closed it and shortly after, laid him in the ground. Strange...I wondered where he was now. Could he see me? I had loved him, loved him dearly. And he had changed.
Angel was sniffing. She had loved him too. My face softened as I looked at her, the crowd was moving away. The service was over. I neared her and she looked up at me with wide, tear filled eyes. She was pretty and tragically sad as well. She had never seen the color of death either. It had frightened her. Was I frightened? I did not know. Did I miss him? I didn't know that either.
"You ok?" I asked her.
She nodded slightly, knowing the meaning behind my words.
"You loved him too."
She nodded again, slowly.
I looked at the gravestone, the only thing that would mark my brother's memory.
"Do you think he's happy?" She asked hesitantly.
I looked slowly at her. Angel was not religious, I doubted if she had any knowledge of heaven. Of paradise. Happy? I suppose so. How could anyone really know? Death was a mystery to me, an occurrence to me feared and generally ignored. My parents were calling me to come to the car. Angel was watching me wide eyes, her mascara streaking her pale cheeks. We had loved two very different parts of my brother. And now he was gone, his body lifeless...empty. Is that why we feared death? Because it was unknown? Because the one whom we had loved was no longer there? Disappeared, whisked away on a breath of air. Where was he now? Was he happy? I looked slowly at Angel, meeting her large dark eyes with my own. She wanted hope from me, words to comfort her. Was my brother happy?
"I hope so."
Talorta would never walk correctly again, the vet said. He was a crippled animal. He'd always be in pain, asked if I wanted him to be put down.
I said no.
He was half-blind as well, and soon he alone occupied the empty pastures of our farm.
I walked him to the arena and I looked at the broken fence, waiting to be repaired. I had loved him. It had hurt me terribly when I lost him. And now he was gone, for ever. Had he loved me? Had he ever been proud of me as I had been of him? Would he miss me?
And I realized as I stood there, that for the first time since he had died...
That I was crying.
These were all memories if someone didn't figure it out. Hoped I made up for not updating with this double chapter. Updates will come soon!
TO BE CONTINUED...