Sassy: Hello!

Yuki: Okay, now what's gonna happen?

Angry Kitty: What are you gonna give us? Remember the bribing?

Yuki: How about caaaaaandyyyyyy?

Tom: ... What kind of caaaaaaandyyyyyy?

Yuki: Only the finest chocolate of course.

Sassy: GIMME!

Yuki: (throws candy at them) Now, what's gonna happen?

Tom: Why should we tell you?

Yuki: I SPENT FIFTY DOLLARS ON THAT CHOCOLATE!

Angry Kitty: And that's fifty bucks down the drain.

Tom: You really need to learn how to bribe. Now that we've got the candy, why should we tell you anything?

Yuki: DAMMIT!

Disclaimer: We no own.

CHAPTER THREE

Yuki looked at the mound of covers that was SUPPOSED to be Samantha and shook it tentatively.

"Samantha? … Samantha, it's time to wake up …," he shook the heap vigorously, "SAMANTHA!"

The covers flew back and Samantha's fist connected with his face. She rolled over and let out a content sigh.

"OW!" Yuki could hardly believe that she could punch that hard and that accurate in her SLEEP! "Okay, I'm going to CHOOSE to believe that that was an accident." He tried once more, managing to duck the punch …

But not the kick.

Yuki held his stomach while simultaneously pressing two fingers to his temples. "Self control, self control," he growled, "Can't … hit … woman … ARGH!"

IIIIIIIIIII

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

Smack.

Ring.

Brittany continued to slap her phone. "Shut up you stupid alarm clo-oh, it's the phone." Snatching it off it's cradle, she bellowed, "WHAT?"

In the background, Kisa stirred and rubbed her eyes blearily.

"Brittany!" Yuki whined, "Samantha just BROKE my NEW NOSE! I can't wake her up!"

"Oh … okay. I'll be there in twenty minutes," she replied, and hung up. She then dialed Rachel's number and tapped her fingers impatiently.

There was a click, and a groggy voice asked, "What the fuck do you think you're doing? Do you know what TIME it is? HAVE YOU NO DECENCY?"

"Time to get up, sunshine!" Brittany chirped. "Samantha broke Yuki's new nose and I need you to make sure no one gets hurt when I wake her up."

Rachel snickered, "His NEW nose? What does THAT tell you? I'll be right over … HEY! KYO! Get off your lazy ass, we're leaving!"

A muffled cry was heard over the phone. "QUIT KICKING MY GODDAMN RIBS, I'M UP!"

Brittany hung up once again and grinned.

IIIIIIIIIII

Yuki was borderline hysterical when they got there. "SEE? She won't wake up!"

His nose HAD been but luckily for him, his pretty-boy face had healed itself. IT'S A MIRACLE!

Rachel had Kisa and Kyo against the wall, assuring them that yes, it WAS for their own good, and if you don't shut the fuck up, Kyo, I'll-

"AHEM!" Brittany cleared her throat inconspicuously. "Now, stand back and watch the master work!"

In one, swift move, she struck Samantha right below her ribcage, grabbed Yuki's collar, and threw them both to the ground.

Limbs flailing, eyes on fire, Samantha shot upright and screamed, "WHO HIT ME?"

"I did!" Brittany yelled from the floor, picking herself up gingerly and hauling Yuki up after her.

Ignoring Kisa's, Kyo's, and Yuki's stunned faces, Rachel snapped, "Get up, it's time to go!"

Samantha shrugged. "Oh … why didn't you just say so?"

END

Yuki: Okay you stupi-I mean Kyo. How are you? You want some breakfast? Bacon? Eggs? FISH? Anything?

Kyo: ... What do you want?

Yuki: Can't I just be nice to my (shudder) FAVORITE cou ... screw this. TEACH ME YOUR WAYS OF THE BRIBE!

Kyo: Okay, get some money, we're goin' to a club.

Yuki: Uh ... why?

Kyo: DON'T QUESTION YOUR SENSEI, GRASSHOPPER! We've gotta learn how to bribe bouncers. You know, the one's with lists that your never really on?

Yuki: (shifty eyes) Of course, Sensei!

Kyo: Good ...