Kyle Katarn: The Rise & Fall
Book 1: Rise of a Hero
Part 2
Chapter 17: Anger's Wounds
A/N: Although I realize the J&K twins are going to be coming after me, I'm posting this chapter anyway. Crazy, I know. I can only hope they'll let me live long enough to finish the story.
Things were bad last chapter for Jan and Kyle. They're about to get downright bleak in this chapter. But there is hope on the horizon, I promise.
Alessa and Wexter spent a restless night in their cabin aboard the New Hope. They both feigned sleep, thinking they were fooling each other.
Wexter stared up at the ceiling, running the events over and over again in his mind. Jan's behavior, Galder's attitude, none of it seemed to make any sense. Granted, he didn't know Kyle Katarn or how close he and Jan were, but they seemed to be friends at least. And friends didn't act the way Jan had towards him.
Ensconced behind a partition, Alessa turned over for what seemed like the umpteenth time, trying to find a comfortable position. She kept thinking about Galder, trying to figure out what her brother was doing. He had always been stubborn, thinking only of himself, a quality that served him well as the son of Alderaan's most prominent citizens. Father had praised Galder again and again for his unwillingness to abandon his stance in an argument, even when he was completely wrong.
"A strong will can overcome logic and wisdom, son." Father would say, "never be afraid to stand up for what you think is right. And never, ever surrender."
Alessa shook her head. That unwillingness to admit error had gotten Galder in trouble more than once, but each time Father had stepped in, bailed him out.
In fact, the only time she could remember Father and Galder disagreeing was over Jan. When Galder had brought her home for the first time, Father had been unfailingly polite and gracious. But the moment Jan left, he had turned on Galder.
"Of all the women in the galaxy, you bring this one to my door?"
"I don't understand, Father. Jan is everything I have ever wanted in a woman. She is pretty, smart, strong in mind and body and quite opinionated. She can be nearly as stubborn as me when she believes she is right."
"But what of her parentage, Galder? She is not of the nobility. Of that I am sure."
"No, Father," Galder admitted, "however, her mother is one of the greatest ballerinas on all of Alderaan and her father a well-respected aerospace engineer."
"Ah, I see. Working class."
"Yes, Father."
"Galder, Galder, Galder," the older man said, shaking his head, "I have explained to you more than once that our family and those like us are a unique part of Alderaan's social structure. The rest aspire to be like us, some would give anything for it."
"Because we are better than they are, smarter, etc.," Galder said woodenly, "I have heard this before, Father."
"Then I ask you again. Why do you bring this woman to my door?"
"Because I love her, Father."
When he had finished laughing, the older man shook his head again. "Love? Galder, I am surprised at you."
"Father?"
"Do you think your mother and I stay together because we love each other?"
"Of course I do, Father. I have always thought so."
Again, the dismissive head shake. "Galder, our marriage had nothing to do with love. It benefited both our families and provided your mother with the kind of life she wanted. For myself, I was given children and heirs in you and Alessa. Beyond that, your mother and I spend as little time as possible together. The only thing we have ever agreed about was that our marriage made good sense. But there is no love between us. It is a useless emotion, Galder. It gives nothing, but asks everything."
"No," Galder said, shaking his head, not believing what his father had just said, "no, this cannot be true."
"But it is. You can ask your mother if you do not believe me. She will tell you much the same thing"
"Why did you not tell me this sooner?"
"Galder," the older man said with a touch of sympathy, "you were a child and too immature to understand nor accept this. So I let you believe your foolish fantasy. I had not planned on telling until you had married. But better you know now rather than stay any longer with this Ors woman, which would be a mistake."
"But I love her, Father." Galder protested
"Have you heard nothing I have said, Galder? Love will get you nothing and take away everything you have. Abandon this foolishness now, before it is too late."
Galder had stood there a moment, then turned and left the room, Father calling after him. But despite the pressure, what he had learned and all of Father's protestations, Galder had still pursued Jan.
It was as if a light had been turned on in her mind. She understood exactly what Galder was doing. He had given up on Jan before, but had decided he wanted her back. And now, he's pursuing her again, manipulating situations to put himself in the best light and Kyle in the worst. Everything from the confrontation with Kyle to what happened on the Aldera. And Jan was buying into it, hook, line and sinker.
What do I do? Alessa thought. I can't just let Galder get away with this. But, I've got to be careful or risk losing Jan as a friend.
Rolling out of bed, she approached the entrance to Wexter's room. Raising her right hand, she tapped the wall once, twice.
"Alessa?"
"Yes."
"You can't sleep either."
"Yes," she replied, "but that's important now, Wexter. I think I've figured out what is going on. We need to talk."
A light came on in his part of the room.
"Then let's talk."
The Next Day
An exhausted Dr. Berth nearly fell into his office chair. It had taken nearly six hours, but it appeared that Kyle was going to be all right.
The operation had been dicey, requiring every bit of the doctor's skill. And all along, he mulled over that it was Jan who had done this. It just didn't make sense to him.
His office door opened, admitting Mon Mothma with Plasdan Marass close behind her.
"Mon Mothma!" Berth exclaimed in surprise.
She wasted no time. "I understand that there was an 'incident' last night and Kyle was injured."
"Yes," the doctor replied.
"What is his condition?"
"Stable. I had to perform a bit of emergency surgery, but everything went well."
"Can I speak with him?"
"I'm afraid he's still unconscious. In order to let the broken bones heal properly, I…"
"Excuse me?" Plasdan said, interrupting, "did you say broken bones?"
"Yes, there was damage to…"
"Perhaps you should start at the beginning, doctor," Mon Mothma said, taking the only other seat in the room.
The Aldera
Jan's eyes opened onto an unfamiliar ceiling. Where am I?
It took her a moment to remember. So much of what had happened was a jumble of images in her mind. She remembered coming here with Galder and then… It took another few minutes, but finally the jumble began to sort itself into recognizable bits. Her right hand formed into a fist as she remembered what had happened. What in Pleiades name had happened to her yesterday? It was as if she had been watching herself say and do the thing she did. And Kyle!
She sat up quickly, a thousand questions ringing in her mind, ranging from why she had struck him to wondering if he was all right. She started to get out of the bed, just as someone knocked from outside.
For a moment Jan wasn't sure what to say, finally settling for, "Come in."
The door opened and in stepped Galder.
"Good morning, " he said.
Jan fumbled for a moment at something to say, finally echoing his words.
"Did you sleep well?"
"I suppose so."
"I'm glad," he said with concern. "You were in a bad way last night. I was worried about you."
Worried about me? This from the man who said I didn't really love him?
"Um, thanks."
"You're welcome," Galder said, sliding off the bed and rising to his feet. "Listen, how about you get dressed and I'll see about getting us some breakfast?"
Breakfast sounded good and for a moment, Jan was tempted to say yes. But then she remembered Kyle.
"Maybe later. I've got to check on Kyle. After last night…"
Galder held up a hand. "I understand completely. Take a moment to get ready and I'll come with you to sickbay, if that's all right.
Why is being so nice? Jan thought. I know we're friends. But, given how we left things, I didn't expect this.
"All right, I guess that would be okay."
"I'll see you in a few minutes, then."
Turning, Galder moved to the door, keying it open. When it closed behind him, Jan sat there for a moment more, staring after him, wondering what exactly was going on.
Time for that later. I need to check on Kyle and talk to him.
Sliding from the bed, Jan stripped off the pajamas she was wearing and moved to the 'fresher. When she emerged a short time later, trying fruitlessly to get her unruly hair to stay in one place, she found Galder waiting. He had changed into fresh clothes while Jan was in the same shirt and pants from yesterday.
"Did you want to stop by your quarters and change first?" he said, looking at her.
"Later," Jan said, moving past him. She headed through the ballroom and into the turbo shaft, Galder following. Emerging from the Aldera, they began making their way across the hangar to the entrance doors.
They were only a few steps away when the doors opened, allowing Plasdan to step inside, flanked by two security guards. He cast about for a moment, then caught sight of them.
"What's this, then?" Galder asked, as the men began moving towards them.
"I don't know." Jan replied as Plasdan walked up to her.
"Mon Mothma would like to see you, Jan."
She nodded, started to move past him. "Of course, Plasdan. I'm just going to check on Kyle first, then…"
Plasdan stepped in front of her, blocking the path. "She said 'immediately', Jan."
"Is there something wrong, Officer?" Galder asked.
"Nothing that concerns you, sir," Plasdan said, glancing at him, then back to Jan.
"Then I assume there's a reason you have accosted us?"
Plasdan's gaze returned to Galder, his eyes narrowing, "I have not 'accosted' you, sir. My orders are to deliver Jan to Mon Mothma immediately."
"Is there something wrong, Plasdan?" Something didn't feel right to her. Plasdan was being unusually serious.
"I can't say, Jan. But I need you to come with me, now."
"Are you arresting her, Officer?" Galder asked.
"Excuse me?" Plasdan said.
"Because unless you are doing so, I believe current law specifies that Miss Ors does not have to accompany you against her will."
"It's all right, Galder, " she began, "I…"
"No, it is not all right, Jan," he replied defiantly, "I don't see where you've done anything warranting such action as this. And I don't believe you should be forced to go with these men."
"I'm not being forced, I…"
"Sir," Plasdan said, turning the full weight of his gaze on Galder, "Miss Ors is an officer under the command of Mon Mothma, who is her commander-in-chief. Jan has been given her orders."
"And I say again…" Galder started to say.
"All right," Jan said, cutting both of them off, "that's enough from both of you. I don't appreciate being interrupted. Galder, if Mon Mothma wants to see me, then I'm going to go. It's as simple as that."
"My apologies, Jan," Galder offered.
She nodded at him. "And Plasdan, I'll be happy to go with you. But first, I am going to check on Kyle."
She tried to move past the security chief and again, he blocked her.
"Would you please move, Plasdan?"
"I can't do that, Jan. I have my orders, as do you."
"Oh, you do, do you?" she said, raising an eyebrow, "Orders to bring me to Mon Mothma right now?"
"She said she wanted to see you right away."
"Ah," Jan said, "but did she give you an order?"
Feeling a bit confused at her attitude, Plasdan replied, "No, not specifically."
"Then I don't see why I should have to come with you before I check on Kyle."
"Jan…"
"I'm serious, Plasdan. Now, please move."
The security chief was perplexed. Why was Jan being so obstinate? Whether Mon Mothma had made it an order or not didn't really matter. However, rules were rules, even when they didn't work out for him like he wanted them to.
Stepping to one side, he allowed Jan to proceed, followed by the other man.
"You know I'll have to report this right away, Jan."
She didn't even look back at him, tossing over her shoulder, "You go ahead and do that, Plasdan."
"I'm sorry, Plasdan. Would you please repeat that?"
Mon Mothma listened to the words, and while she understood their meaning, the reason behind them was very obscure. Rarely did she need to order Jan to do anything. But after what the doctor had told her, she was beginning to wonder if there was something seriously wrong with the woman.
"Very well then. Plasdan, I am now officially ordering you to locate Jan Ors and bring her to the briefing room as soon as possible."
"Understood Mon Mothma."
"And if she should question you, then you are to do the following."
When Mon Mothma had finished speaking, Plasdan stared at the comm speaker for a moment, unsure he had heard correctly.
"Do you understand my instructions, Plasdan?"
He responded automatically. "Yes, Mon Mothma."
"Good. Then I expect you to execute your orders immediately."
"Yes, ma'am."
Jan decided that Galder's suggestion was a good idea and made a quick stop by her quarters for fresh clothes before continuing to sickbay.
Pausing outside the doors, he turned to her.
"Jan, perhaps I should wait here."
"What?"
"Given what happened yesterday, I'd just as soon not upset Katarn again."
"Galder, if he's going to be upset with anyone," she said, "it's going to be me."
He gave her a confused look.
"You and Kyle may have had words, but," she paused, her eyes dropping down to stare at the deck, "I was the one who… hurt him." Her tone was disconsolate.
"Now, now," Galder said, "none of that. What good will it him if you come to see him such a state?"
"But Galder, when I saw him lying there, I…"
"Jan…"
"I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't go see him right now. I'm almost afraid of what he might say.
"Nonsense, what happened yesterday was unfortunate, Jan. But it was not your fault.
"Then why am I here and he's in sickbay?" she asked.
"Jan," he replied softly, "I can't explain why Katarn acted the way he did yesterday. But, he was getting out of control. You stepped in to help me. You could almost say you were protecting me."
She colored a bit at that, embarrassed. "We're friends, aren't we?"
"Yes we are," Galder replied, smiling at her, "and I appreciate what you did for me yesterday. I'm just sorry that Kyle chose to provoke you."
"Provoke me?"
"Of course, Jan," he said smoothly, "you remember what happened. You pushed him away from me and told him to 'back off'".
She nodded, remembering the astonished look on Kyle's face when she had pushed him.
"And then he came at me again and made that ugly comment."
"That I was fighting your battles for you," Jan said.
"Exactly, and remember that he intimated that you were my girlfriend and I was your boyfriend."
"I remember," Jan said, "I didn't like it when he said that."
"Of course you didn't. It was inappropriate and mean-spirited. I don't understand what possessed him to say it."
"Well," Jan pointed out, "he was angry with you, Galder."
"I know," he said with annoyance, "and had I known his temper was so short, I wouldn't have asked for him to apologize to me."
"Kyle's usually not like that, " Jan said, "I don't understand why he was acting like that."
"I wonder if it might have something to with us being together on the Aldera."
"Excuse me?" Jan said, eyebrows raised, "are you serious?"
"The two of you are partners, Jan," Galder said, "and I'd guess friends also."
"That's ridiculous," she said.
Galder shrugged again as if to say, "maybe, maybe not."
"Listen," Jan said, "Kyle and I are friends and we've partnered together on missions. But that's all there is between us."
"It's all right, Jan. You don't have to tell me…"
"Galder," she said seriously, "Kyle and I have nothing like what you and I had back on Alderaan. We're good friends, and that's it."
"I guess that rules out jealousy as the problem," he said.
"Most definitely," Jan said.
"In any case, you two are friends and right now, I imagine he will want a friend."
"But what if he…" she trailed off, leaving the thought unfinished.
"That's why I'm going to come with you," Galder said firmly, "given the state you're in, I'm not going to have you face this alone."
She stopped walking, turned to him.
"Thank you, Galder. Y'know something?"
He shrugged.
Jan hugged him, said into his shoulder, "you're a good friend too."
He returned the hug, smiling to himself at how well his plan was going.
Disengaging, they continued until the reached the sickbay entrance doors.
"Are you ready?" Galder asked.
"I was just going to ask you that," Jan said.
They smiled at each other and with a deep breath; Jan stepped to the doors, which parted before her.
The doctor caught sight of them, as they were about halfway to the patient wards. Stepping from his office, he called to Jan. Acknowledging his greeting; she headed over to where he was standing, her face carefully composed. Berth noted that she wasn't alone. He studied the man's face, but didn't recognize him.
"Dr. Berth," Jan said, "is Kyle all right?"
The doctor nodded. "It was touch and go for a while, but I was able to stabilize him. He's resting now."
The relieved expression on Jan's face nearly weakened the doctor's resolve. But he had his orders.
Still, he was surprised as with no further preamble, Jan started towards the ward.
"Wait a moment, Jan."
She paused, turned to look at him.
"I'm afraid I can't let you go in there."
She frowned at him. "You can't let me? What is that supposed to mean?"
"Just what it appears to be, I cannot allow you into the patient ward."
"What are you saying, Doctor?" Galder uttered, "Jan only wants to make sure Mr. Katarn is all right."
"I understand that, but for the moment, I cannot permit her access."
"And may I know why?" Jan asked hotly.
"My orders came directly from Mon Mothma. Sickbay is off limits to you for the time being."
"Until when?"
"Until Mon Mothma says differently," the doctor replied, "I'm sorry, Jan. But I have to ask you to leave Sickbay."
"I'm not leaving until I see Kyle."
Berth's pleading expression changed to a more serious tone. "And I have told you that you cannot do that right now."
"Say what you will, doctor," Jan replied, "but I'm going in there whether you want me to or not."
"I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, Jan. Security is on the way here."
She stopped, turned to look the doctor right in the eyes. She could see that he was serious.
"Doctor," Galder began, "this is preposterous. I demand that…"
Just then, the sickbay doors opened. In walked Plasdan, this time accompanied by four guards. Wasting no time, he walked right up to where Jan was standing.
"Jan Ors. I have received orders directly from Mon Mothma that you are to come with me immediately."
"What's going on, Plasdan?" she said, "I just want to see Kyle, then I'll come with you."
"I've also been instructed that if you resist," he continued, "I am authorized to place you under arrest."
"Excuse me?" Galder said, "why? What is she being charged with? I…"
"Sir," Plasdan interrupted, turning to look at him, "I have already told you this matter does not concern you. Should you continue to interfere, I will place you under arrest as well for obstruction."
"You wouldn't dare."
Plasdan met the man's eyes, his expression saying 'just try me.'
"It's your call, Jan," the security chief said, turning back to her. "Either way, you are coming with me, now."
She shook her head derisively. "This is ridiculous, Plasdan. I can't believe you're acting this way. And threatening my friend?"
"I have my orders, Jan, and now so do you."
Jan took a moment to consider her situation. Granted, she had struck Kyle. But he had provoked her! And he had threatened Galder. While she wished she hadn't hurt him, Kyle had been in the wrong. Why was Mon Mothma making it such a big deal? She was half-tempted to tell Plasdan that she wasn't coming, but she was outnumbered five to one. Bad odds in any situation.
"All right, Plasdan, I'll come with you. But I think you're overreacting."
The security chief nodded.
"Wait a moment, Jan," Galder said, stepping up to her. "I'm going too. I won't have you face this alone."
Jan looked over at him, smiling. "That's sweet, Galder. But this is Mon Mothma we're talking about. You've got nothing to worry about."
"Still…"
"All right," she said, "if you really want to, it's fine with me. Plasdan?"
"Mon Mothma will have to make the decision on whether he can stay or not. But for now, I don't see the harm in him coming along."
"Good, "she concluded, "Then it's all settled. Let's go. And Doctor Berth, I will be back to see Kyle."
The doctor said nothing.
Feeling a mixture of confusion and frustration, Jan headed for the exit. As she walked, the guards moved to encircle her, preventing any avenue of escape.
She was tempted to say something about it, but held her tongue. Whatever was going on would become clear once she saw Mon Mothma.
The Rebel leader scanned the report again as her guest finished speaking.
"And you witnessed this?"
"Yes, Mon Mothma," said Wexter, "I'm still having trouble believing it. But everything happened just as I described it to you."
She turned to Alessa. "And you can confirm this?"
"Yes, I can. I was there with Wexter the whole time this was happening."
"Well, thank you both for your time. I know this is a difficult situation for both of you as it is for me."
"Do you have any idea what is wrong with her?" Wexter asked.
Just then, the briefing doors opened, admitting Plasdan, Jan, Galder and the guards accompanying them.
"I believe I shall have the answer to that momentarily," Mon Mothma said, rising from her chair, "If you will excuse me?"
Nodding, Wexter rose from his chair, Alessa a step behind him.
As they drew closer, Galder and Jan caught sight of them at the same time. They traded looks; both thinking What are they doing here?
"Alessa, Wexter," Galder said, "I must say this is a surprise. How did you come to be here?"
"I invited them," Mon Mothma said out loud.
Why would Mon Mothma want to interview them? Jan asked herself and a moment later, answered herself. It must have to do with what happened last night.
As Alessa moved past, Galder reached out and grabbed her arm.
"What did you tell her?" he whispered.
"The truth," Alessa hissed back, not meeting his eyes.
"And what's that supposed to mean?"
"Galder," she said, face twisting in pain as he bore down painfully on her arm, "you're hurting me."
"Then tell me what I want to know. What did you say?"
Noticing that Alessa had halted, Wexter turned back, saw Galder holding her arm. He must be trying to find out what we told Mon Mothma.
"Alessa," he called loudly, "we really need to go."
Galder threw a look over his shoulder at the older man, then released his sister.
"We'll continue this later," he whispered fiercely.
She didn't answer, moving past him to where Wexter was waiting. Together, they left the briefing room.
"Now, Jan, "Mon Mothma began, "You and I have much to discuss. But first, who is this?" She indicated Galder.
Jan opened her mouth to speak, but Galder beat her to it.
"Galder Thonx, " he said, bowing. "A pleasure to meet you."
Mon Mothma returned his greeting with a slight nod. "Would be related to Alessa?"
"Yes," he said, "she's my sister."
"Ah, well Mr. Thonx, since I know you were part of the matter I am about to discuss with Jan, would you care to join us and tell me your version of what happened?"
"Call me Galder, please. And yes, I would be honored to join you. But I do hope I'm not intruding. Jan and I have known each other for many years and given what happened to her yesterday, I thought she might need some moral support."
"Please," Mon Mothma said, indicating chairs, "sit."
When Galder sat next to her, Jan couldn't help but turn and smile at him. Maybe Galder had changed since she had last seen him. Since yesterday, he had been both supportive and caring. It was a refreshing change from the man she had once known.
As Mon Mothma took her seat, the smile on her face disappeared. She gave Jan a look of disappointment.
"I have received some very disturbing reports regarding an altercation between you and Kyle yesterday, Jan. Would you like to tell me what happened?"
When Jan moved to speak, Galder cut in again. "Mon Mothma, I'm sure you can appreciate that the events of yesterday have been quite trying on Jan. And while she regrets what happened to Mr. Katarn, it occurred only after he had provoked her."
Sitting back in his chair, Galder smiled expansively, sure that he had gotten the best of the Rebel leader.
Jan was nodding as he spoke. "That's it exactly."
"I see," Mon Mothma said, turning to Galder. "Mr. Thonx, while I do appreciate you being here to offer moral support, my question was directed at Jan, not you."
Assuming a recalcitrant expression, Galder leaned forward. "My apologies, Mon Mothma. I only meant to offer my own perspective of events. And please, call me Galder."
"And I am interested in hearing that, Mr. Thonx," she said deliberately, " But not until I ask you, clear?"
A muscle twitched in Galder's cheek and his polite smile faded. But he managed to nod his acknowledgement as he settled back in the chair.
"Now Jan," Mon Mothma said, turning back to her, "I understand that Kyle and Mr. Thonx were arguing when you stepped and told Kyle to 'back off'. Is that correct?"
Again, Galder spoke before Jan could. "Mon Mothma, I do apologize for speaking out of turn. But you should know that Jan stepped in only after Mr. Katarn threatened me with bodily harm."
Sighing, the Rebel leader turned to him again. "Mr. Thonx, I have already explained to you that I wish to hear from Jan, not you. Do not interrupt again, understood?"
Again, Galder nodded.
Keeping an eye on him, Mon Mothma addressed Jan again. "Now, during the exchange between Mr. Thonx and Kyle, I understand that you pushed Kyle. Is that true?"
Galder leaned forward. "Mon Mothma, I feel that I have to say…"
"Mr. Thonx," the Rebel leader said loudly, cutting him off, "I have asked you twice to not interrupt. And twice you have done so. If you cannot control yourself, I shall have the guards remove you."
"I was only attempting to explain…"
"Do… not… interrupt… again…" Mon Mothma said in measured tones, "Am I clear?"
Jan turned to look at him, shaking her head, her expression saying, 'you'd better listen to her. She means it.'
"I understand," Galder said.
"Good," Mon Mothma said, "Jan, before we continue, I want you to take a look at this."
Placing her hand on a nearby data pad, she slid it across the table. Jan picked it up and began reading.
Mon Mothma watched as the young woman's eyes went wide, her expression changing from neutral to one of sadness.
"What is it, Jan?" Galder asked, seeing the change in her face.
"That is the report from sickbay on the extent of Kyle's injuries." Mon Mothma interjected.
Wordlessly, Jan passed it to Galder. His eyes went wide as he read the display.
Mon Mothma's voice was serious as she spoke. "If you had hit Kyle just a bit harder, Jan, some of the bone fragments from his broken nose would have been driven up into his brain. That, along with the impact from the fall would have killed him."
Silence reigned in briefing room for a full minute. As Galder passed the data pad back to Jan, he contemplated the consequences of what had happened yesterday. He had known Katarn was injured. But in his wildest imaginings had he considered that it could have been fatal. For a moment, he wondered if pursuing his plan to get Jan back was worth it.
She's worth it, he thought, and as for Katarn, at least he's alive. Getting her back is too important to abandon my plans now. If he's smart, he'll stay out of my way from now on.
"Now, Jan," Mon Mothma said, breaking the silence, "I would like an explanation of what occurred."
At first, Jan couldn't find her voice. The shock of what she had done to Kyle was nearly overwhelming.
"Jan?" Mon Mothma prompted.
She began to talk, her voice nearly emotionless. It took a little more than ten minutes to describe the incident in the mess hall, followed by her argument with Kyle in the hangar bay and what happened aboard the Aldera.
When she finished, Mon Mothma saw that Jan was beginning to shake, the impact of what she had done finally hitting her. And while she felt sorry for what the young woman was going through, it could not excuse her actions.
"M… Mo…. Mon Mothma?"
"Yes, Jan?
"P… Pl… Plea… Please understand that I never meant to hurt Kyle. But I was afraid of what he might do to Galder and…"
"Jan, I know Galder is your friend and you have a sense of loyalty towards him. But, you stepped into a matter that was clearly none of your business and struck a fellow soldier. I cannot ignore the facts."
Jan nodded, knowing what was coming next.
"And because of this, I have no choice but to confine you to the brig for a period of no less than thirty days."
Jan bit her lip as her eyes dropped to study the surface of the table.
"Plasdan, if you will escort Jan to the brig, I believe we're finished here."
The security chief moved to stand behind Jan just as Galder spoke up again. "Mon Mothma, "he said, earning a look from the Rebel leader, "are you sure this is a fair sentence. It's not like Jan meant to hurt Katarn."
"Mr. Thonx," she replied, a trace of anger in her voice, "you saw the report from sickbay, did you not?"
Galder nodded.
"And you witnessed Jan's actions?"
"Yes."
"Then you will understand when I say that Jan is at fault for Kyle's injuries after forcing herself into a situation that was clearly none of her business."
"But…"
"Mr. Thonx, I have been more than patient with you during this entire discussion. And even after repeated warnings, you continue to interject yourself into the conversation. You have no stake in this matter and I would thank you to stay out of it."
"I only thought that…"
SMACK!
Galder and Jan jumped in their seats as Mon Mothma struck the table with the flat of her hand.
"One more word from you, Mr. Thonx, and I shall have you removed to the brig as well."
"You can't do that," Galder said defiantly, leaning forward in his chair, "I am a citizen of the planet Alderaan. You have no jurisdiction over me."
Mon Mothma nodded and two of the guards stepped up behind Galder. Grabbing his arms, they pulled him from the chair. Galder struggled, but the two guards were stronger than he. A moment later, his hands were behind his back, a pair of binders encircling them.
"Mon Mothma!" Jan cried, "Please don't! Galder didn't mean anything."
"He is leaving me little choice, Jan."
"He's just trying to protect me. Please Mon Mothma, let him go."
Considering the matter for a long moment, she nodded. "Release him."
Galder shook off the guard's hold on him as soon as they released the binders. He glared at Mon Mothma but fortunately, didn't say anything.
"In case you've forgotten, Mr. Thonx, Alderaan is gone. Destroyed by the Empire. You are aboard my ship. I would thank you to remember that. Plasdan?"
Pulling her chair out, the security chief gently took hold of Jan's arm, leading her out of the briefing room.
"Mon Mothma?"
"Yes, Jan?"
"I'll understand if you say no, but may I go check on Kyle? Find out how he is?"
The older woman considered the request, then nodded.
"Thank you."
Nodding, Mon Mothma moved back towards the table as Plasdan guided Jan out of the briefing room, the guards trailing behind him.
"Is there something else, Mr. Thonx?" she asked, noticing that Galder was still glaring at her.
He stared at her a moment more then with a curt, "No," turned on his heel and left the briefing room.
Once outside, he looked over his shoulder at the closed doors, muttering a curse. How dare that woman treat me like that? I don't deserve this. If it wasn't for Jan…
He looked down the hallway, watching as Plasdan, Jan and the guards turned a corner, disappearing from sight. Thirty days, he thought. Hmmmm… there may be a way to turn this to my advantage. Smiling to himself, he moved off after the guards.
A bright light flooded his vision. He tried to put an arm across his eyes to shield them, but he couldn't move.
"So, you're finally awake," said a voice.
Blinking several times, Kyle squinted against the bright light overhead. The doctor reached for a control and turned it, lowering the brightness.
"Thanks."
"You're welcome."
Able to see, Kyle looked about his surroundings, recognizing it almost immediately. Closing his eyes, he shook his head. "Not again."
"I'm afraid so."
"I give up, doc. I'm moving in next week, okay?"
The doctor laughed. "I think that can be arranged."
Kyle tried to move again, but again his arms wouldn't respond.
"Um, doc? I can't seem to move."
"Oh," the doctor said, moving closer and reaching down to Kyle's arms. "Sorry about that." He began undoing the restraints. "You were thrashing about in your sleep and I thought it best to keep you restrained until you woke up. There, try again."
True to the doctor's word, Kyle was able to lift both arms easily. "Thrashing about, huh? I do remember having a very vivid dream. I think Jan had hit me, or something like that."
The doctor's smile disappeared.
"Doc," Kyle asked, concerned, "what is it?"
"I'm afraid it was no dream, Kyle."
"You mean that…" Reaching up to his nose, he squeezed experimentally.
"Ouch!"
"You nose was severely broken. I was able to repair the bone, but it'll be tender for the next day or so."
"Wait a minute, doc. If it wasn't a dream, then are you saying Jan hit me… on purpose?"
"Mon Mothma is speaking with her right now trying to determine exactly what happened. But, from what I've learned so far, yes."
"But why?"
"I don't know," the doctor said.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Kyle said, shaking his head, "this doesn't make any sense. We had an argument yesterday and…"
Closing his eyes, Kyle tried to remember what had happened after Jan had left him in the Crow. But try as he might, the memory wouldn't come.
"Doc, I'm trying to remember what happened, but…"
"Not to worry," Berth replied, "the blow to your head probably caused some short term memory loss. You needn't be concerned."
"Not concerned? Doc, you're telling me my friend and partner clobbered me last night, busting my nose and I can't remember why. I think that's cause for concern."
The doctor began to say something, but was cut off by the sound of the sickbay doors opening.
"Doctor Berth?" a voice called.
"I'll be right back," the doctor said to Kyle, moving past the curtains encircling the bed.
"Yes, can I help y…" Berth began to say, his voice trailing off as he caught sight of Plasdan, Jan and the four security guards. He gave the security chief a questioning look.
"Jan would like to see Kyle. Mon Mothma has given her permission to do so."
The doctor hesitated for a moment, unsure if he should allow this. If it was as Kyle had said, that Jan had struck him on purpose, having them together in the same room could create a very tense situation.
As if sensing what the doctor was thinking, Jan spoke up. "Please, Doctor Berth. I only want to make sure he is all right and then I'll leave."
Berth hesitated a moment, then said. "Very well. But you'll understand if I have Plasdan come in with you. My patient has been through enough and I don't want you causing him additional trauma.
Jan looked hurt, but the doctor maintained his serious expression. Now was not the time to give in to emotion.
The security chief nodded and stepped forward, Jan following. Berth led them to Kyle's bed, pulling aside the curtains so they could enter.
"Plasdan!" Kyle called.
"Hello Kyle."
"I heard you got promoted, congratulations."
"Thanks."
"So, what are you doing here?"
"Well," the security chief said hesitantly, "I'm afraid that I'm here in a official capacity, Kyle."
"Not more questions over the battle, I hope."
"No, this has to do with what happened yesterday."
"The doctor and I were just talking about that," Kyle said, "Plasdan, have you seen Jan? I've got to talk to her.
Stepping back, Plasdan nodded to someone outside the curtains.
Brows knit in confusion, Kyle watched a silhouette pass by, then the person came into view. His mouth dropped open, eyes nearly bugging out his head in surprise.
"Hello, Kyle," Jan said, moving to stand at the foot of his bed.
He sat there, not saying a word, staring wide-eyed at her. Jan knew one of them should say something. But what?
He's probably wondering what happened and why, she thought, and how am I going to explain this to him?
She noticed that he looked well. Doctor Berth had repaired all the damage her punch had done to him. That was good. Some of the worry she felt evaporated. But in its place was fear. Fear of what he would say. Fear of what he wouldn't say. Fear of what he would do.
Beyond the fear, she felt confusion. All her feelings of the close friendship they had warred with what she had done to him. And then there's Galder, she thought. How can I explain to Kyle us spending the night together? We didn't do anything, but still…
Please say something, Kyle. I want to tell you, explain what happened. But I don't know how.
Realizing that he was staring at her, mouth hanging open, Kyle attempted to find his voice.
What am I going to say to her? Hi Jan. So, why did you clobber me last night? Yeah, that'll go over real well. But I still want to know why.
A name surfaced in his mind.
Galder. We were arguing and Jan…
In a flash, the memory of what happened came to him.
"Why don't you let your 'boyfriend' fight his own battles, Jan? C'mon, Galder, you too scared to fight me without your 'girlfriend'?"
"SHUT UP, KATARN!"
That was it. She stepped between Galder and me. And that's when it happened.
He's still staring at me, Jan thought. I've got to say something, try and explain.
Kyle's face began to change. His mouth closed and the surprised expression left his face.
Why is he looking at me that way? Is he… angry with me?
With a mixture of anger and confusion on his face, Kyle finally spoke.
"Why?"
Jan didn't answer at first, not seeming to understand the question.
"Why what?" she replied.
"You know what I mean, Jan," Kyle said, the beginnings of anger in his voice. "Why did you get angry at me yesterday? Why did you step in between Galder and me when it clearly wasn't your fight? And most of all, why did you hit me?"
Each question was like a stab inside her. She had known that she'd have to explain herself and her actions, but she hadn't been prepared for the fierceness of his words, the look of anger and accusation he was giving her.
I want to answer him, she thought, I do. But how can I? How can I explain what I did?"
"Well?" he demanded.
"Kyle," she began, "I didn't… I didn't mean… what happened was… please understand…"
She stopped speaking, realizing that she was babbling. All right, Ors, she thought, steeling herself, get this over with.
"Kyle," she said pleadingly, "please understand that I never meant to hurt you. It's just that, when you started attacking Galder, I was afraid…"
"Attacking?" Kyle said incredulously, "You think I attacked him? Not likely. If you remember, Jan, Galder was the one who came after me, first in the mess hall and then just before you hit me."
"I didn't mean to say you 'attacked' him, Kyle. It's just that…"
"I tried to bury the hatchet with the guy, and then he demands I apologize to him?"
"You have to understand, Galder…"
"I don't have to 'understand' anything, Jan. Galder's your friend, not mine."
"Yes!" she exclaimed, her hands curling into fists, "he is my friend, Kyle. And as my friend, I feel a certain sense of loyalty towards him."
"I see, and that loyalty means you have to fight his battles for him?"
"No! I was just worried that he was getting in over his head and that you might hurt him."
"Ah. So, you decided clobbering me was the best answer."
"No!" Jan yelled. She was getting more and more upset. She didn't want to fight, but Kyle was relentless.
"Then why Jan? You've told me time and again how friends and partners should treat each other."
"I know."
"You know, when the doc first told me what happened, I didn't want to believe him. I didn't want to believe that my friend and partner would do something like this. And now, you come here and try to offer excuses for what you did? What am I supposed to think, Jan? Tell me, what am I supposed to believe?
She felt tears welling up in her eyes. Looking away didn't help. The image of his face was burned into mind, his expression alternating between anger, confusion and pain.
Please, Kyle, she thought, please. I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you. Forgive me. Forgive me for what I did.
Seeing that her control was beginning, Kyle forced himself to reign in some of the anger he felt. He was mad at her, and rightly so. But as he looked at her face, he that Jan was trying valiantly not to cry, her trembling lip indicating that she was losing the battle.
He knew he could continue to verbally beat her. But what would it solve? It couldn't take back what had happened last night nor would it help things now.
Blast it, Jan. Why did you do this? That's all I want to know. Why? I thought we were friends and maybe more. But now, I'm not so sure.
"Then why, Jan?" he said, his voice much softer this time, "why did this happen?"
"I… I was afraid for Galder. I didn't want him to get hurt. He's my friend, Kyle. I had to protect him."
With a flash of insight, the whole situation became clear to him. He now knew why Jan had reacted as she had. But the answer, while evident, was not one he was happy with. He knew now why she had hit him and why she was making excuses for it. At the same time, it told everything he didn't want to hear. But, he couldn't deny the truth of it. This is how things are, he thought, and how they're going to be…
"I think I understand, " he said, his tone suddenly thoughtful. "Galder is your friend."
"Yes," Jan said, nodding.
"A friend you've had for many years."
She nodded again.
"A friend you feel loyal to."
Again, she nodded.
"And you felt torn between the friendship we have and what you feel for Galder?"
Jan's eyes brightened. He did understand!
"Yes," she said, the beginnings of a smile on her face, "that's it exactly."
"So, last night, you had to choose between me and Galder. And you chose Galder."
"Yes."
"I see."
With sudden realization, Jan's feelings of happiness over Kyle's understanding turned to ash inside her. Did I really just tell Kyle that I chose Galder over him? No, no, that isn't right. It's not what I meant. I had to pick a side last night, and chose Galder's. But it doesn't mean I prefer him over Kyle.
But as she looked at the expression on Kyle's face, she could see that he was thinking exactly that. That she had chosen Galder over him.
"Wait, Kyle," she blurted out, determined to clarify things, "That's not what I mean. Yes, Galder and I are friends and have been for a long time. But you and I are partners, and that means something to me."
"But not enough for you to choose me over him."
No, no no, she thought, realizing that she had an even bigger mess of things. This isn't right. She took a moment to collect her thoughts before speaking again.
"You misunderstand me, Kyle. Yes, Galder is my friend, but so are you. So why can't all three of us be friends? That way, everything works out and we can still have our partnership."
But instead of the pleased expression she assumed would come, Kyle's face twisted in anger.
"You expect me to just forget what happened last night, Jan? Pretend it never happened and go make nice with you and Galder? Sorry, but that's not going to happen."
"No, Kyle, I…
"Look," he said, holding up a hand to stop her, "don't say anymore, okay? You come in here, make a bunch of excuses for decking me last night, then try to explain that even though you've chosen Galder over me, that three of us can still be friends. Are you really that naïve, Jan?"
She tried to interrupt, but he kept talking.
"I trusted you, Jan. I've placed my life in your hands more than once and I even went so far as to open my heart to you. And now, you return all that by busting my nose and knocking me out."
"Kyle…" she said pleadingly
"I'm not finished yet," he said, cutting her off, "I don't know what's happened between us that you'd do this to me, Jan. But know this. I don't like Galder, and after today, I'm not going to. And as long as you want to be with him, I don't want to see you, I don't want to speak with you. Now, why don't you do both of us a favor and leave, okay?"
Her heart ached terribly with each beat as he spoke. Jan couldn't believe this was happening. There had to be a way to stop this. She couldn't just walk away from him like this. Not like this.
Moving around the foot of the bed, she stepped towards him. "Please, Kyle. Let me explain. I…"
"Plasdan!" he called, "get her out of here! I don't want to listen to her anymore!"
"Perhaps we should go," the security chief said to Jan, stepping up behind her.
"No," said Jan, shaking of Plasdan's hand on her arm. "He's got to listen. I've got to explain this to him. He's got to understand."
But as she looked down at Kyle, he had turned away from her, staring at a section of curtain.
"Kyle?" she called.
He didn't respond, nor turn to look at her.
"We should go," Plasdan said again, taking a firmer grip on Jan's arm.
"Kyle, please. Don't do this to me. Don't do this to us."
After a minute passed without a reply from Kyle, Plasdan took a step back, pulling Jan with him. She thought about fighting him, but then remembered the four guards outside. And the last thing she needed to do right now was to make things any worse than they already were.
Her eyes stayed on his face until the curtain cut off her view. Determined not to cry in front of Plasdan and his men, Jan stared fixedly down at the floor as she was led out of Sickbay.
Inside the curtained room, Kyle waited until he heard the sickbay doors open and close. His own tears came, hot and painful. He hadn't felt like this since being informed of his father's murder. Why? Why did she do this to me? Why choose Galder over me? I thought we had something, maybe not love, but something special. And now, she tosses it all away in favor of this other guy. He wished he had never met Jan Ors.
As they approached the brig, Jan heard a voice call to her.
Raising her head from her study of the floor, she saw Galder. He was standing by the entrance, an expectant look on his face.
"Chief Plasdan," Galder said, stepping forward, "may I just have a moment with Jan?"
"I have my orders, sir."
"Just a quick moment. I won't be able to talk to her for the next thirty days." Galder waited, then added, "Please."
Plasdan considered the request. Orders were orders, but what could it hurt to let the pair have a minute together?
"Just a moment, Mr. Thonx."
"Thank you, Chief Plasdan."
Moving close, Galder saw the expression on Jan's face, his own expression changing to one of concern.
"What happened, Jan?"
"I saw Kyle," she said softly, the tears beginning to come. "I tried to explain things to him and I thought he understood. But now he thinks I've chosen you over him. I've hurt him even worse, Galder. I feel so terrible."
Yes! Galder thought, this is fantastic! The breach between them is there. Now, all I have to do is step in.
"I'm so sorry, Jan," he lied, "maybe when you get out, you can talk to him again. Make him understand what you really mean."
She shook her head. "It's too late. He wouldn't even look at me when I left. Whatever we had together, I'm afraid it's gone."
Galder fought not to smile in triumph.
"Oh, Jan. I am truly sorry. I know I really don't know Katarn, but I feel sorry for the both of you."
"Thank you, Galder," she said, "thank you for being with me through this mess."
"I'll always be here for you, Jan. Things may changed between us. But we'll always be friends."
She looked into his eyes, a smile on her lips, the pain she felt over Kyle reduced somewhat.
Now, Galder thought.
Leaning in, he closed his eyes and kissed her. He felt Jan's surprised reaction. She pulled away, her eyes wide with shock.
"What are you doing?"
"Jan," he said, smiling at her, "you and I had something good once. I know things can never be the same again, but I still care about you. And I want you to care about me again."
"Galder…"
He pressed a finger to her lips, stopping her in mid-speech. "Don't answer right now. Just think about it, okay."
Her mind whirling, Jan stared at him for a long moment. The shock she had felt when Galder had kissed her was matched only by the stunned feeling she had now over what he was saying.
Is he serious? After all this time, he thinks we can get back together? I don't know… after what happened on Alderaan. But then she remembered his kindness yesterday, comforting her after the incident with Kyle. Could he have really changed? Do I still care about him? She just didn't know.
"I'll think about it," she finally said.
"That's all I ask," Galder said. He opened his arms and couldn't help but smile as Jan stepped into them. He hugged her tightly, feeling the press of her body against his.
"Mr. Thonx?"
Galder pulled his head up from where it rested on Jan's shoulder to look at the security chief.
"Of course, Chief Plasdan," Galder said, gently breaking the embrace and stepping back. "I'll see you in thirty days, Jan."
She nodded at him, and then followed Plasdan as he guided her into the cell.