You actually thought I wanted you to tell me new ideas? Oh well, I plan on doing one NEW advertisement for every 4 old ones, so at the end of each chapter you get a treat for being such loyal fans. But know that I am only asking you and telling you stuff through the italics
ADVERTISEMENTS SSBM STYLE!
PART 5:
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, but sometimes I have dreams…
Reviews: wow! I got happiness from the people about this story… I got 3 reviews but when I clicked to see all of them only 2 popped out… hmmmmmm…
I had technical difficulties today and therefore updates will take awhile… ahh well… I didn't expect anyone to like this…: -)
PART 5! GEICO!
Popo and Nana were sitting there on a mountain having a good time when Nana slipped and fell to her bloody doom.
"OH NOOOO WHAT WILL I EVER DO!" Popo screamed in horror.
He called the rescue squad… Yoshi, DK, and Kirby.
"IT'S OK! WE'LL GET HIM OUT OF THERE!" DK yelled causing an avalanche to roll down the mountain where Nana had fallen. "umm… oops?"
They lowered a rope with DK on it, but DK was too heavy for them so DK ended up falling.
(Nana's POV) the snow had fallen on her and she was feeling numb when a big, brown, hairy thing fell right on top of her, breaking every bone in her body.
(Back to Popo) "IT'S OK SIR! I CAN FLOAT!" Kirby yelled and then started on his way down… the problem was that he got frozen into a solid and fell down at the others like a bowling ball.
"Sorry… it's too dangerous! But I do have some good news…" Yoshi started, but before he could finish he slipped and fell to his doom.
"ahh man…" Popo said as a gecko ran up to him.
"ahh hello there… I happen to be a gecko and NOT a Geico… ahh yes…" the gecko said, but was soon frozen into an icicle.
"Ohh well… my girlfriend and all of those innocent people may have died… but the good thing is…" Just then Popo slipped on some ice and cracked his head open, then he fell to his doom.
(Nana's POV) Nana had somehow survived and her last words were… "I have some good news… I just…" but then Popo landed on her and killed her.
Part 6! Subway!
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Bowser was a twig… he couldn't stand up due to the weight of his shell.
"I USED TO BE LIKE THIS!" a picture of a horrifically powerful and deadly Bowser popped up.
"It would always get in the way of my life! BUT NOW I TRIED SUBWAY!"
A before/after chart appeared showing Bowser's strong and powerful image right next to him not being able to get up because of the weight of his shell.
"And it's not just me who lost weight! THESE PEOPLE DID TOO!"
There was a picture of DK, the most powerful of all jungle creatures, and then there was a picture of a skinny and dieing DK trying to crawl to a banana.
A picture of Kirby showed up, then a huge Kirby with blobs upon blobs of fat showed up.
Kirby jumped on screen. "I LIKED SUBWAY SOOOO MUCH THAT I GAINED 300 POUNDS OFF IT!"
Bowser then shoved him out of the way, or at least tried. What ended up happening was Bowser getting launched into a corner somewhere. Screams could be heard as the camera went to the new scene.
"Whatever! Ignore the taste! You WILL lose weight! AND you could even get away with murder!"
Just then Bowser's legs collapsed under the weight of his shell and we could hear a strange cracking noise…
"Ohh… that's ok… I had sub…" Bowser died.
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PART 7! ENERGIZER!
Dr. Mario was Operating on Luigi. "Alright! Just one more minute and I have this finished!" Just then the batteries to Luigi's life support systems ran out and Luigi died.
Nurse Peach was working on a sick patient and got all the way through the treatment…
A bunny walked by beating its drum, it keeps going and going and going and going…
Fox was about to defeat Andross once and for all when his ship stalled and then crashed, killing him.
Falco stayed in the battle though, and managed to kill Andross.
A bunny floated by beating its drum, it keeps going and going and going and going…
Roy and Marth were examining these strange "batteries" for the first time… they slashed them open getting battery acid all over the place and causing them to run around screaming in horror. As they ran they tripped over a bunny beating its drum… SMASH!
They were bloody and crying as screams were heard… but the bunny keeps going and going…
Kirby and Yoshi were in a pie-eating contest… Kirby's pie timer ran out of batteries, so Yoshi won by default… so Kirby turned over and ate Yoshi
A bunny walked by beating its drum, it keeps going and going and Kirby suddenly jumped out in front of it and ate the bunny, but the bunny then ripped out of Kirby's back causing Kirby to die of suffocation.
It keeps going and going and going and going and going and going and going…
Pikachu and Jigglypuff were in a Pokemon duel when the potion Pikachu was going to drink ran out of batteries (don't ask).
So Jigglypuff killed Pikachu with an extra special hard punch that went right through his gut. Ash laughed.
Then the bunny walked by beating its drum, it keeps going and going
Jigglypuff punched the bunny in her anger. It zapped her, killing her instantly. Ash laughed and started pissing on the twitching Pokemon when the electric shock traveled up his urine and killed him.
The bunny keeps going and going and going and going…
Samus and Captain Falcon were fighting on his racetrack. As Samus went to shoot C. Falcon with her cannon, it ran out of batteries. C. Falcon then used the batteries he had lodged in his arm to use his Falcon Punch and kill her.
The bunny walked by beating its drum, it keeps going and going and going and going…
C. Falcon then ran up to hit the bunny when the batteries lodged in his arm poisoned him. He died.
The bunny keeps going and going and going and going
Just then the racecars sped by and ran the bunny over… all that was left was some zapping parts and the remains of an electric bunny.
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PART 8! NINTENDO GAME VIXENS! (From Video Game Vixens on G4)
(Narrator has a "sexy" voice… Narrator has a "girls" voice… Narrator has a "voice")
Samus started walking around in her full outfit, she sat there in her fighter stance.
"Who has the smoothest skin?"
Samus slipped because her metal suit had been polished too smoothly. She struggled to get up, but just couldn't. She finally just gave up and sat there.
"Find out… on Nintendo Game Vixens!"
It showed Jigglypuff take a dive for a lake below. She started floating down. Waiting to reach the bottom. Any minute now… COME ON ALREADY! She still wasn't there…
She finally plopped into the water and started floating away. A shark then ate her.
"Nintendo Game Vixens… only on G4TV… hosted by C. Falcon, DK, Mr. Game and Watch… and even Zelda."
Link popped up. "ZELDA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THIS SICK SHOW?"
"They paid me I swear!" she screamed as she looked around nervously.
"Be sure to watch each naughty episode with content so mild you'd probably rather go on the computer and look up porn that isn't as annoying and doesn't have nerdy freaks sitting there talking about it as you watch it… but this is still what we call naughty so you should watch it… ohh yeah…"
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA
I have to say the Energizer one was my favorite one to do so far… it's better than the Sprite one even (which is one that I loved)!
Read and Review… and I will put 4 more advertisements on the list (the next 4 I think of OR that you give me will be on here)
And just to tell you guys, I do like some of the things I make fun of here. So don't be offended if I make fun of your stuff too…
Yay…
And now for the new one I promised…
PART X-1! NEXTEL!
Link walked up to Zelda holding his new Nextel cell phone thing.
"So, this has no overages or something like that right?" Link asked.
"How the hell would I know? I don't even work here!" Zelda responded.
"And there's free walkie talkie minutes?" Link asked again.
"I told you! I don't work here!" Zelda screamed.
"And I can get free ring tones? And there's some deal about getting a free phone and stuff?" Link said with joy.
"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! ASK SOMEONE THAT WORKS HERE!" Zelda said and then killed herself with her Tri-force piece.
"Kind of makes you want to jump up and down and scream for joy doesn't it?" Link said in a humorous way that made everyone that cares about him laugh…
No one laughed…
Link sat there in silence.
"We have a room for that right over here!" said Sheik (who was not Zelda and was a boy) winking at Link and dragging him into a closet. Screams could be heard.
"Shouldn't we help that guy out?" Luigi asked Mario who was just walking around the store.
"Nah, it's just the scream-for-joy room anyway" Mario said shrugging and leaving.
"OK then…" Luigi said following his brother.
Narrator: "Buy a new Nextel Walkie Talkie Cell Phone Thingamabob today! And get twenty-seven free honkeys with your order!"
Just then the KKK (Kiddy Kooky Klub) walked up and killed the narrator.
YAY!
Well… that's my new advertisement… I'm pretty sure you'll hate it… also… we've got a new opening for anyone who wants to be my narrator… just PM me for the job…