I like this stuff… Fanfiction deleted it though… And that is why I slit my wrists every day…
ADVERTISEMENTS SSBM STYLE!
PART 13
Disclaimer: I only own my happiness at this moment… cause I'm smarter than your average bean (and beans are freakin smart!)
Reviews: fanfiction made me censor it!
I AM LOVED! (Actually I can't do this at the moment… I'm bust being an idiot… on newgrounds)
PART 13! SKITTLES!
Samus and C. Falcon were flying in a space ship towards a new bounty when C. Falcon plopped a skittle into his mouth. Suddenly, skittles started raining down on his ship causing major damage.
"AHH! WE'RE GOING DOWN ON THAT PLANET!" Samus screamed as the ship flew down towards some random planet with flames trailing. Suddenly a skittle broke through the front window, causing her to almost get sucked out of the cockpit despite her best attempts to hold onto her seat.
Just then, C. Falcon (who couldn't hear due to the noises being made by the skittles) screamed out. "WHAT?"
More skittles rained down upon the poor ship causing one of its engines to blow out. The ship started going in circles.
"WAAAAA!" Samus screamed spinning around and getting sucked out into space.
"WHAT!" C. Falcon replied.
Mario, Peach, and Luigi were all sitting on a rainbow eating some skittles on the planet below. Mario suddenly burst out. "I don't believe"
The rainbow opened and Mario started to fall but then Samus came falling down and bumped Mario back onto the rainbow. Luigi and Peach looked at this and scooted over a bit. They started to slide down the curve of the rainbow, and, with no chance to get away, splattered into the ground below.
Then Mario sat on the Rainbow below until the ship C. Falcon was still in fell on top of him and ended up breaking the whole rainbow.
DK and Bowser were sitting there poking a skittle wondering what the shiny red thing did when broken pieces of the rainbow killed them.
The narrator suddenly screamed "HEAR THE RAINBOW! FEEL THE RAINBOW! BELIEVE THE RAINBOW! TASTE THE RAINBOW!"
Link suddenly walked up to a table with a lone, shiny, green skittle on top of it. He bent over and took a huge whiff. The skittle flew into one of his nostrils. Link gagged, stumbled around a little, and then fell over dead.
"SMELL THE RAINBOW! TASTE THE RAINBOW!" the narrator screamed.
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PART 14! STARBURST! (It's old, but I just had to) (this seems better in present tense)
Kirby sucks in a starburst and gets a stoned look on his face. He starts walking down the street looking all happy and creepy and stuff… even though King Dedede is chasing him with a hammer.
The whistle tune thing starts
Yoshi is having a REALLY hard time trying to lay an egg when Kirby passes. Yoshi eats a starburst, looks stoned, and starts following Kirby.
Peach is slapping Mario whilst screaming about some 'divorce' when Kirby and Yoshi pass by. He eats a starburst, looks stoned, and walks along with the others as Peach chases Mario screaming.
C. Falcon is getting arrested by a cop about having drugs that look oddly like starburst when the guys pass him by. He takes some drugs… I MEAN STARBURST… looks stoned, and walks along with the others as the cop calls for reinforcements about an escape druggie.
As they walk along they see Pikachu and Pichu. The two take the starburst, look stoned, look at each other, scream because they think they're hallucinating, and run off. As they run they get hit by the cop cars, which are racing towards the group.
Yoshi's egg plops out of him with a horrific crunchy noise as Yoshi falls over screaming.
Everyone else is walking along with the whistling when the cops run up and start beating C. Falcon to the ground.
Kirby and Mario are still walking along, looking stoned, when King Dedede finally catches up to Kirby and slaps him with a hammer. Kirby pops.
Mario keeps walking despite all the chaos around him when a volcano erupts right in his path. He walks into it without a care.
"AHHHHHH THE PAIN! THE HORRIFIC AGONY! MAKE IT STOP!" Mario screams falling over as he is covered in lava. Just then a car runs him over.
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PART 15! TACO BELL!
Kirby was sucking up houses and fat people and stores, but nothing could make him feel full. Fox and Falco were running around in the horror of things being eaten by Kirby when Fox suddenly got an idea.
"I KNOW! LET'S GO TO TACO BELL AND GET FULL!" Fox cried.
So they ran to Taco Bell and ate stuff and got full. Then they forgot all about Kirby.
As Kirby was walking around eating everything in sight, Yoshi ran up from behind and kicked him.
"HEY! You can just go to Taco Bell an…" Kirby ate him.
Samus and C. Falcon were flying by in a spaceship when they went to Taco Bell and got full.
"Wow that's so good!" Samus screamed.
Fox, who was sitting there, remembered Kirby and then got an idea.
Just then Kirby ran in and ate him.
"NOOOOOOO…" Falco started to scream dramatically but was then sucked up.
Kirby then turned on the Taco Bell where random SSBM characters were standing and feeling full. Kirby ended up eating the whole Taco Bell. He started to feel full.
"YAY! I'M FULL!" Kirby screamed. Sadly, as he had eaten hundreds more tacos then what is required to make someone full he started to bloat. He kept growing bigger and bigger and then popped, getting pink blobby stuff all over the place.
"EWW! C. Falcon how are we going to clean this up?" Samus asked as the viewed the horror.
"We don't have to. We're full!" C. Falcon answered.
"YAY!" They both screamed in joy.
They then tried seconds and fell over dead from becoming too full.
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PART 16! BLOCKBUSTER!
Gannondorf was standing outside of a Blockbuster.
"Yeah… life after late fees has been so cool… I can watch my shows… return them late just to say I did and be a rebel… I mean… because the return date is a hard date to memorize… yeah… and… it makes me feel free and stuff…" Gannondorf said to the camera.
It went to a different Blockbuster where Link was standing.
"I like to watch the same movie OVER and OVER and OVER and OVER and OVER and OVER and OVER until my family forces me to return the thing before they kill me. And now with the lack of late fees I can! AND I don't have to pay any extra money!"
It then went to Zelda.
"Screw you! I'm not turning this in! I'm going to keep this video forever!" Zelda screamed and started to run off. The camera turned around to see her running in the parking lot when a truck suddenly hit her.
It went to Y. Link.
"Ha! I can steal something from here and bring it back in a year and they wont do anything!" he shouted with joy… no… glee sounds sexier…
"Actually, you can only keep it for a week extra… then the late fee applies again…" the cameraman said pointing to the VERY fine print that Joeb was bored enough to read whilst watching this advertisement.
"WHAT KIND OF LIE IS THIS? I THOUGHT YOU HAD KILLED LATE FEES!" Y. Link screamed.
"No… we only give you a week, then we say we get rid of the fee so when you come back really late we can get you with the fine print that nobody ever bothers to read. It isn't false advertising either as long as it's in the advertisement, which it is… it's just hard to see!" the cameraman explained with an odd enthusiasm.
"YOU GUYS SUCK!" Y. Link screamed and started running away when a truck hit him as well.
Words suddenly appeared on the screen in a bright flash while someone yelled them. The words said, "That's right! Try to never give them back and we'll hit you with a truck!"
Gannondorf walked into the store looking shady. He then pulled a gun and screamed.
"This is a stick up! I wan…" Just then a truck flew in through the wall and ran Gannondorf and ONLY Gannondorf over before pulling out.
Well… I would have done this earlier today… but I was on newgrounds… and playing GTA…
Oh well… sorry to anyone who has no life and so they live on this sight… I really am sorry and I will spank myself tonight to make up for it…
(Half of my life is all about this website… and I STILL suck at it!)
Its been a year… some say I've lost my touch… actually that's just me being paranoid because everyone that liked me showed their true colors and abandoned this site… Either way this is my next NEW advertisement…
PART X-3! VERIZON BUSINESS! (For convenience the narrator is in italics)
(Cue the dramatic music)
Marth, Roy, and Pit were all attempting to walk down a street at night while looking at the black sky dramatically. Sadly, because of this they didn't see the oncoming car. They were hit and all died of a CD related wound in the hair.
The two, best phone companies around have joined forces. Verizon and MCI have joined to make Verizon Business. Same Verizon, except now we've replaced those freaks working for MCI with our own guys. I mean, why else would we keep Verizon in there and delete MCI as if it was never even a company? These guys are screwed. That's fine though. Verizon is really cool and stuff. I might want to get back to the task at had.
Everyone was trying to look dramatic but failing and breaking their bones due to the lack of a serious narrator. Luckily he got back on track and people could continue to look in random directions.
We bring everything to your business.
Zero Suit Samus was walking down the streets of some Oriental city when she went to an ATM and pulled out thousands of Dollars for no apparent reason. She was immediately mugged from behind. When the ambulance got there they decided to let her die because she didn't have any money on her.
We let you look dramatic, knowing that you don't have anything to worry about when your life is placed in the hands of someone who dances for joy just because they got a new pencil.
C. Falcon was walking down a soccer field dramatically when some kids accidentally kicked a ball over to him. He immediately went and kicked it back to them. Sadly, he kicked it too hard and ended up killing the kids.
Wireless networking means you never have to bother smelling that nasty guy who always comes to the meetings.
Bowser was on a screen as everyone else was at the meeting. People were putting up nasty signs all over Bowser's monitor and making fun of him, as he couldn't do anything about it. Suddenly there was a malfunction in the network and the screen exploded, killing everyone inside of the meeting.
So join Verizon Business today, and learn what it's like to be handled by professionals.
Everyone was standing there looking around at random computer terminals with smiles on their face when they all looked up at the camera at once and gave a reassuring grin. This changed to a horrified look as they realized that girls gone wild cameramen instead of the normal Verizon cameramen were filming them. The girls in the room all took out explosives in their anger and blew the entire studio into France, where it was converted into a gay center.
Well wasn't that an interesting ending… I didn't come up with it though… voice number seventeen was the one responsible for that… so if you have any complaints please go cry to your mommy first… seriously… yo mama's so wise… she knows stuff… and stuff…
Whatever just don't review… whatever you do. I'm begging you not to!