The Terrible Enemy

By: Kowareta

Summary: There are no worse things known to man than murder, theft, rape, and all the usual crimes. There is no vile evil more wrong than one o' them distant dark overlords bent on the domination of the worlds. Or something similar.There is no thing more unthinkable than, well, something unthinkable. Except, maybe...

...Fangirls.

It is the battle between the forces of the very,very evil, versus the terribly mundane. Read on as Kurama tries to preserve his sanity, and as his friends battle to keep their lives intact and away from the edge of conflict. They're not to know, of course, that there's no real way to escape the terrible enemy.Caught between the dark hoarde of Fangirls, and a small resistance movement, will Kurama and his friends survive the encounter?

This sounds entirely way too dramatic than it really is. But have fun. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho.

---

Kurama was paranoid.

They were everywhere. Like every annoying insect that ever existed. Ants, beetles, flies, cockroaches, you name it. They were always there.

In the corridors, behind the corners, on the sidewalks, in his classes, in convenient stores, everywhere. Like some army of seifuku-wearing assassins. Perky, happy, and squealing in high-pitched voices, as if the call could be heard by the other members. And if the call was heard, then the response was immediate. They would come flocking around him. Talking all at once in their high voices, squealing at everything he did, watching him with their terrible, soulless eyes.

He had finally found a corridor that seemed remotely clear of those terrible, terrible beings. He leaned against the doorway of a classroom to determine whether or not those things were in it.

Thud!

A noise!

No time to think! He had to take a chance!

Kurama quickly ducked into the classroom. His heart was pounding.

"Ha ha!" came a loud, male voice from the hallway, "Gotcha there, Kazuo!"

The crimson-haired youth gave a sigh of relief. Boys. Just boys. Another thud and Kurama assumed that this 'Kazuo' had punched the other boy back. Childish.

"Shuuichi?"

Kurama stiffened. There it was. That horrible voice with it's horrible tone of inquiry. Slowly, he turned around to face his abhorrent and woeful fate.

The squeal was immediate, and so was the glomp. So deadly was that attack Kurama was sure that he could never truly defeat it. He fell to the floor, his assailant atop him.

Fangirls.

---

"Oh! Look, Moeko! Look! There he is!" exclaimed a plump girl with curly amber hair.

She was sitting at a table in a school cafeteria and was staring across the room at a boy with long crimson hair. The excited girl was shaking another girl that had messy dark hair and horn-rimmed glasses.

"Yes, Nakita, I see him," drawled her companion, "He's hard to miss with that gaggle of girls crowding around him."

It wasn't a large cafeteria. Several wooden tables were set up in rows of five by eight. The floor was dusty and dirty with random debris. It is, after all, a teenage-lunch room. Large windows were opened and the cool air of autumn flowed inwards. One could see the great pigmented leaves of the season wave and ripple on the trees outside.

"He's so cute! He's so popular! He must feel like the happiest person in the world being who he is. Smart, athletic… everything!"

"He looks like a cornered animal," said Moeko indifferently, watching as the boy in question gave a small nervous smile towards the seven or eight girls that were surrounding him, "I feel sorry for him."

Nakita rolled her eyes and snorted at Moeko who continued to eat the rice from her Kamameshi bento. Sighing, the amber-haired girl glanced back towards the crimson-haired boy. The girls were crowding in so it was hard to see him, but it looked as if he said something that made some of the girls leave, scrambling away like disturbed scavengers from a kill. The remaining two girls continued to talk to him. The alpha and beta of the pack?

It's not fair, she thought wistfully, I wish I could talk to him.

Nakita was plump. Large, thick, and tall. She was dressed in Meio's seifuku, complete with necktie, blazer with school crest, and tartan skirt. She had a heart shaped face with kind almond-colored eyes. Her nose was flat but her nostrils flared out. Like a hippopotamus. And was she just as coordinated. Yet her body was just as big as the heart inside it. Loud, naïve, but caring. That was who Nakita was.

"How is the Volunteer Club going for you?" inquired Moeko.

"It's going okay. We haven't done anything cool yet. But we did go to a hospital to keep the children in there happy. You know, the ones who can't leave. We read books to them."

Moeko nodded.

Moeko was the complete opposite of Nakita though she too wore the same Meio seifuku. She was as skinny as a toothpick; flat-chest, thin arms, thin legs, and a pointy nose. She was like some sort of dark crane and probably just as elegant. Fierce green eyes were framed behind her horn-rimmed glasses. Moeko was quiet, mature, and diligent. It was like she had grown up too fast.

"Do anything interesting lately?" asked Nakita.

"I had to pee into a cup. Is that interesting to you?" her friend replied grumpily.

"Oh, so you went to the doctor yesterday, huh?"

"I was supposed to have my blood drawn and my blood drawn only," said Moeko closing up her bento and placing the clay pot it came in within her school bag, "Evidently my doctor had other plans."

Nakita laughed, but kept a hand on her mouth and turned away from her friend so that Moeko would not notice. The only problem with that is when Nakita laughs her body shivers and shakes vehemently, which defeats the purpose of trying to let on that she's not laughing at her friend.

Moeko glared, "Oh, I suppose you've never done anything embarrassing?"

Nakita grinned and fluttered her eyelashes, "Of course not."

Moeko merely scowled and returned her attention to the boy Nakita had been slobbering over, "What's his name again?"

The plump girl swooned, "Shuuichi Minamono."

"So…" began Moeko, "Why exactly do you like him, again?"

It was like an American animated cartoon. You could just see the stars and hearts floating around Nakita's eyes.

"Because he's simply amazing!"

"Uh-huh. Question: Why?"

Now it was Nakita's turn to scowl moodily at Moeko. Whenever she was taking flight into dream-land Moeko brought her down to earth. She didn't necessarily like her friend butting into her day-dreams but she knew that it was probably essential to staying at least fractionally sane.

"You wouldn't understand," Nakita explained, wrapping her arms around herself like she was giving herself a hug, which in reality looked like she was wrestling a grizzly bear "You've never been in love."

"Okay, so you and about half of the other girls in school are running around chasing this poor defenseless boy around, just because you like him for no other reason than he's nice, attractive, and athletic?" Moeko wondered skeptically.

"So what? I'm shallow," excused Nakita lamely.

"Doesn't matter," sighed Moeko, "I don't care. Are you busy this Sunday?"

Nakita contemplated a moment before saying, "No. Why do you ask?"

The dark-haired girl shrugged, "Matsuri. I have some time off and I know you have nothing to do because there are no club functions on Sundays. I thought you'd like to go with me."

"Oh," said Nakita, mildly surprised, "Can I bring my parents?"

Moeko shrugged, "I'm bringing Grandpa."

Nakita took that as a "Yes." Of course Moeko would never give a direct answer, she thought, as if my question was too hard to understand.

Moeko smiled impishly. She was no mind reader, but she knew her friend well enough to know what she was thinking. Nakita swore that Moeko only smiled when she knew she was getting on someone's nerves.

A bell rang. And Nakita started packing up her own Noriben bento, the one she had brought from home. Moeko waited for her friend while watching as the other teenagers packed up their lunches and left. Like a crane, her sharp, predatory eyes easily picked out the red-head among the flock of students. There was a chase.

Two female students, the same ones that had been conversing with him earlier, were frantically searching for him through the crowd. The boy, with subtle and graceful movements, passed through the flock easily, like a wolf slinking through enemy territory.

Moeko grinned wryly. Poor boy.

---

Author's Note: I apologize for the amount of Japanese. It lessons in later chapters.

Seifuku: is a Japanese uniform strictly for girls of middle and high school age (although some people wear it as a costume).

Kamameshi Bento: A regular bento is Japanese for a single-portion takeout meal. A traditional bento consists of rice, fish or meat and one or more pickled or cooked vegetables as a side dish.

Noriben bento: is the simplest bento, with nori dipped in soy sauce covering cooked rice.

Matsuri: Are like festivals or holidays in Japan and are sponsored by local shrines and temples.

-KowaretaTsubasa