How to Write:
"The Ultimate Explosion Final Battle Life or Death Amazing Astounding Epic Fatal Grand Super Smash Brothers Tournament!"
at school.
By tikitikirevenge (get it? Because it's me?... oh, fine).
Suddenly, the Second Fight
"But the plot inconsistencies…" protested Zelda.
"NOT IMPORTANT! FIGHT 2 BEGINS NOW! Crazy Hand, draw some names out of a hat!"
"Okay, dearies!" said Crazy Hand, collapsing to the ground in a faint.
"Uh… so much for that…" said Master Hand. "Uh… the next fight shall be between Peach and Mario!"
Everyone stared in shock.
Mario, of course, was completely taken aback. "Me-a? Fight Peach? But… but…"
"Yay!" said Peach. "I get to beat up the evil Bowser!"
"No, Peach," whispered Luigi. "Mario."
"Yay!" said Peach. "I get to beat up the evil Mario!"
Mario fainted from shock.
"Pichu!" said Pichu, stumbling into the room, looking battered. "You evil, evil… hand!"
"Agh! Mouse!" said DK, leaping onto Pichu. "There… it's gone now… we can all be nice and happy again…"
(--Because, obviously, this story sucks, we need a running gag or something as comic relief so that people can feel as if they partially enjoy it.--)
On the roof of Peach's Castle…
"Ooh!" said Peach. "My castle has a roof?"
"Yes," said Master Hand tiredly. "most castles do."
"Yay! Can I join the Smash Tournament?"
"You already have," replied Master Hand.
"Do I get a prize?" smiled Peach.
"MARIO! GET DOWN HERE BEFORE I GO BONKERS!" bellowed Master Hand.
"Yay!" said Peach.
Mario ran up to them, looking flustered.
"Right," said Master Hand. "I made the two of you fight because that would be cruel and unusual. Fight."
Peach gave a scream of sugary-ness and started whacking Mario with her parasol.
"Mamma mia!" said Mario. "I thought we were-a friends!"
"Yay!" said Peach, bodily tossing Mario off the roof.
"Nooo!" shouted Mario. "My wildest dreams!"
"Well," said Master Hand. "I guess this means that OH LOOK AT THE TIME it seems the chapter is over."
"PLEA BARGAIN SHOP," said Crazy Hand.
"Right…"
"Excuse me," said Zelda, "you still haven't explained why on earth the tourn-"
"CHAPTER OVER!"
Next chapter: another pointless interlude.