A/N: Yeah! Another chapter- and this one's with some Inuyasha/Jakotsu interaction, though, as said before, it's not sappy and mushy. Rather it's the kind of "I-hate-you-so-much-I-wish-murder-was-legal," interaction. Anyway, got another review- whoop-dee-doo!

Review Responses

Pointy-Eared Archer: Yeah, totally- I thought Eowynn was a better elf than Arwen. Because elves are supposed to be graceful, beautiful creatures, not lumbering, time-wasting fools. Heh. But, the only reason I can fit Jakotsu so well into the stalker-type character is because I have a friend almost exactly like him. Stalker-ish and the like. Also, that is a good point- the only real yaoi pairing in the series is Jakotsu and Inuyasha, and yet there's so many more Miroku/Inuyasha pairings. Oh well- it's only because it's sort of hard to develop a relationship between two people who really know nothing about each other. Muchas gracias for da review, homes.

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Chapter Five

I'd like to begin this chapter by introducing you to a man some know and some don't. He's a good-looking guy, with dark, silky hair and bright, soulful eyes. He's clean and is majoring in medics, aspiring to be a children's doctor because he loves helping children. Aside from being intelligent and humanitarian, he has a deep, profound respect for women. He's a gentleman who also believes that women can do anything men can do, and are not to be objectified.

Now that you're properly acquainted with him, I'd like you to meet my good friend Miroku Conlan.

Miroku's the exact replica and the exact opposite of whatever I said in the first paragraph. He's dark-haired with blue eyes (and no, I don't know if his hair is silky or not, you sick fuck) and he's pretty tall, but he's not majoring in medics. Truth be told, he's into religion; not the Irish-Catholic type, like his crazy Grandma, but the more spiritual-hippie type. Miroku Conlan could be considered a hippie. Miroku is open-minded, and nice enough, I guess, except for the fact that he's a delinquent. And it's not like he knows what he's actually doing sometimes- or maybe he does. But it always seems like it's subconscious, the way he doesn't care if anyone finds out, is looking, or doesn't approve of his constant stealing, pawning things off illegally, and vandalizing of desks. He also shares a deep, profound respect for women. Especially their bodies.

Yup. My best friend is a groper.

And it's not like girls don't like the attention; if you're not getting groped, that means you're ugly. And getting a pinch in the butt is okay once in a while, but Miroku has a problem. Really- it's not a once-or-twice thing. It's constant. He'll be talking to Sango or Kagome or Ayame and he'll start stroking their legs or asses or shoulders without even knowing it. My best friend Miroku Conlan has a problem.

Miroku wanted to be a monk because he's lived in religion all his life; his dad, who's Irish, is a reverend at St. Midroko's Church, so he had decided early in life that he wanted to be something to do with spirituality. So he decided to be a monk. Until he figured out what "celibacy" really means.

Anyway, enough of him. I had to go to school the next day, Wednesday- the worst day on the schedule. I had my free period with Man Purse, an English teacher whose real name is Mr. Gatenmaru Ushitaro and is nicknamed as such for the man purse he carries around all day.

I dumped all my books on the table in the study hall, sliding in towards Miroku and Rin. Miroku and Rin always sat together, because Rin's the only girl merciful enough to deal with that fatherless lesbian Miroku. Kagome usually didn't sit with us 'cause she was too busy with her friends Eri, Ayumi, and Yukka. Who I don't like at all. But whatever.

"Someone's grumpy," Miroku said, with a sly, toothy grin.

"Shut yer hole," I snapped, opening up my science book. I turned to some assigned page and started to illegally do my homework. Illegally by school rules.

Miroku shrugged. "So, Inuyasha, what brilliant schemes have we devised for ourselves today in order to avoid Kouga?"

"None. I've got shit to do. Watch to see if Man Purse is watching," I commanded, concentrating fully on the questions about the epidermis and sweat and blood vessels.

"Well, I suppose I could, when I really look into the goodness of my soul," he said, sighing as if it were a burden. He went back to smiling.

Rin changed the subject, while twisting a section of hair into a side-ponytail. "Miro,-" her cute nickname for Miroku- "why'd you come in late third period?"

He sighed. "Well, my father wanted to question me as to just where I got the stop sign in my room," he replied, calmly. Miroku has this stop sign that we stole hanging over his headboard. I didn't have anything to do with it- it was all his idea. "And I very generously explained how the cops gave it to me after I helped rescue a kitten-"

"That's a lie," I spat.

"Not a lie, exactly- I'd call it a 'fabrication,'" he answered. "And he spent about a good forty-six minutes scolding me about lying. To make the conversation lighter," he said, with eyebrows raised towards me, suspiciously, "who is this 'Jakotsu' character your brother yelled at me about?"

I nearly choked on my own tongue. I coughed for a little while and then said, "What!"

"I called your house earlier," Miroku said. He looked at Rin, who nodded. "Actually, I was three-waying. Which doesn't sound right, now that I've really gotten a chance to think about it. Anyway, we were on the phone and we called your brother. He picked up the phone and yelled…what did he yell, Rin?"

Rin inhaled, like a little kid, and spat, in her imitation of my brother's voice, "'I thought I told you to stop calling my house, you manic stalker. If you really want to impress my brother that badly, I suggest you take a long walk off a short pier. Do not overestimate my power of temperance, because if you choose to, you won't have a voice box with which to speak with my pathetic runt excuse for a brother!"

Miroku laughed. I folded my arms and scowled. He cleared his throat. "Anyway, we- by which I mean Rin and Rin alone- calmed him down, and asked him who he was talking about. He told us about this 'Jakotsu' person, and how you and him seemed to be 'good friends.'"

Rin and Miroku snickered as my blood went hot. My stupid, stupid brother- over-exaggerating such a stupid situation…I'd kill him…better yet, I'd make prawns for dinner and strap him to a chair and shovel them into his mouth…I sighed and went back to my homework.

"What, no answer?" Miroku asked. To Rin he whispered, very loudly, "I THINK HE HAS ISSUES."

"ME TOO," she hissed, "DON'T TELL HIM THAT THOUGH." They started to laugh.

I slammed my book shut. "Look, Jakotsu is just some weird, random guy who for some reason decided to pick on me instead of any of the other gay people in the world! I don't like him, don't know him, and don't want to! We're never gonna talk again and I'll make sure of it so don't you go blabbin' to Kagome, ya hear?"

The two idiots blinked for a second. I scowled. "Nothin' to say? Good." I went back to me homework, when:

"MR. MIYAZAKI! YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE DOING HOMEWORK DURING YOUR FREE! COME UP HERE RIGHT NOW!"

The whole study hall "oooh-ed" as I closed my notebook and reluctantly got up from my seat. Before I left to go meet my punishment, I slid a clawed finger across my throat to Miroku, mouthing, "You're dead."

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The end of the day came, and I emerged from last period Spanish with seven homework assignments paired up with a punishment from Man Purse, telling me to write "I will not disobey the school rules" five hundred times. Peachy. Just fucking peachy. To add a big, happy bonus to the end of my day, I found Kouga flirting with my girlfriend and my girlfriend not even trying to stop him.

He was leaning against her locker, arm supporting him, other arm resting on his hip. I saw red. "Well, Kags, are you going to the next pep rally?"

I saw her fake-smile. "Sure am."

"You wanna go with me?" he said.

I jumped in, again feeling like Mission Impossible, taking him by the collar and holding him two inches off the blue-and-white tiles. "The hell she is, you fucking retarded jock!" I growled.

"INUYASHA!" Kagome exclaimed. She folded her arms. "You know, my therapist told me that violence is a product of insecurity and guilty feelings. We can talk, you know."

I emitted a low growl from the back of my throat. Lately, Kagome had been obsessed with her "therapist," talking about all the psychology and other boring shit that he told her. I'd like to take her therapist and throw him off the Golden Gate bridge at a very high velocity. I set Kouga down, now far too preoccupied with my hate of Kagome's therapist to fight Kouga. "Whatever," I mumbled.

Seemingly from out of nowhere, one of Kouga's minions, Hakkaku, ran up, winded, panting and sweating like all Hell'd been cut loose. "Well it's about time!" Kouga exclaimed.

"S-sorry, Kouga," Hakkaku muttered, his gray-and-white hair matted with sweat. "It takes a lot of w-work to get from here to the store and back to s-school again-"

"Just shaddup and give me the thing!" Kouga near-yelled, further terrifying his bastard henchman.

Hakkaku held out a bouquet of white-and-pink flowers out to Kouga. "Here, Kouga!"

"Thanks," he replied, and handed them to Kagome. "Here- 'cause I knew your favorite colors are white and pink, so I figured I'd give you a little something, for no reason."

She smiled. "Carnations- thanks, Kouga, they're…nice."

"I know," he said. Glowering at me mockingly, he saluted and ran off. "Bye!"

Were Kouga not the track team all-star, I would've run after him and rip out his spleen with my bare hands.

But he was, though I hate to admit it, faster than me, and Kagome was now glaring at me like I'd broken a commandment. "Whaaat?"

She crossed her arms. With a small "humph!" she walked away.

"Oh, come on! He's such an asshole!" I yelled after her. No use. I bit my tongue down, hard. Stupid Kagome. Stupid Kouga. Those two should get married-

I shook the thought from my mind. Married…ugh. Gathering my composure, I scouted the hall for Miroku. He was right in back of me, smiling. I asked him why. He said that I had a temp-er. I rolled my eyes and told him to shut the fuck up.

We walked outside. Little did I know that my day was about to get worse. Oh, so much worse.

I couldn't complain about the weather- typically Fall weather, cool and dry. The leaves crinkled underneath my feet as we walked out and onto the walk. Across the street from Shikon Public High is a residential street- the houses there are all the nice, mutli-story brick and stucco type houses with hedges and perfect lawns. Suburbia type houses. The kind of house I live in- right around the corner from this street.

Miroku was suddenly taken with the view to his right. "Hmmm," he hummed, pleasantly to himself. I looked in the direction of his gaze.

"What?" I asked.

He pointed. I looked- standing there was Sango, in one of those shirts Kagome and her had picked out and bought at the mall and a pair of jeans. Now, normally I would've said "What?" But I soon noticed that Sango's shirt was a little bit…see-through. I grunted. "You pervert."

"I need to apologize anyway," he decided. "For our last date- that was some time ago, but I fear a woman has a better memory than an elephant. Well, I'm leaving- I walk home that way, besides. Ciao!"

I waved him off. "Yeah yeah. Have off with you, ya dirty slut. Get out of my face."

He smiled, bowed slightly, and ran off. I rolled my eyes. People don't get much stupider than Miroku Conlan. Still grunting over what a supreme loser he was, I turned around and immediately bumped into something. I got knocked back a couple of inches.

"Hey, watch where you're going, you-" I looked up from the gum-decorated cement to see, oh no, Jakotsu Himekawa.

He was looking up at me, grinning like a madman, wearing a dark blue screen t-shirt that had "Hugs not Drugs" imprinted on it in yellow lettering. His eyes were shot open-wide, glittering with all his insanity. "Shit," I muttered under my breath, as he drew me into yet another one of his breath-defying hugs.

"Yashie! Boy I'm glad to see you! Think of all the fun stuff we're gonna do today-" he started to say.

I knocked him off and shook my head, amazed at his ignorance. "WHOA, WHOA, back up! What 'stuff'! Why the hell are you at my school?"

He shrugged, smiling absently. "'Cause, Yashie, you go here- that's reason enough for me."

"You stalker," I said, furious. Great- my day was going shitty andthis, this...stalker,had just made it the most shitty-fied it could ever be.

He giggled. "Don't distort. You know, you seem very restricted- you should just let go, Yasha. Being restricted doesn't fit your personality."

"You don't know shit about my personality," I replied. "And I am not restricted, thank you very much!"

"Yes you are," he answered. "You're so confined. Anyway, where do you want to go?"

"HOME!" I exclaimed.

A wicked smile played on his lips as he looked at me darkly. "Wow, Yasha, I didn't know you were so-"

"Shut up! I didn't mean it like that!" I screamed, not caring whether the whole bloody school heard me. Fortunately, amidst the shrieks and giggles and cheers of all the school kids, my shouts were nothing.

"Aww, you're no fun," he said, pouting. "So. Where shall we go today?"

I opened my mouth to scream something to the effect of "FUCK OFF!" but no words came out; just a heavy, tired sigh. I was exhausted today- too exhausted to fight him. My shoulders sagged. "If I go with you," I began. His eyes lit up. Cautiously, I pointed out, "if."

"Go on!" he urged, dismissing my cautionary "if," too ignorant for his own damn good. He thought- knew- he would get his way today.

"If I go with you…will you please. Please. Stop bothering me?" I asked, begging now. Ugh. I was pathetic.

He paused, and then, moving forward to hug me, squealed, "Oh Yasha! Yes! I'll do anything you want!"

"Knock it off," I commanded, pushing him off me. I looked at him in the eye, this time seriously. "You'll quit bothering me? For real?"

"Yeah whatever," he said, starting to drag me away from my school by the wrist. I knocked his hand off, pushing him further away and seizing him by the shoulders.

"Ja-whatever-your-name-is! Give me a straight answer! Will you stop bothering me?" I asked, slowly and surely so he got the message.

He sighed and rolled his eyes. "O-kay," he sighed. I couldn't help but be confused at his expression- a bit disheartened, with his shoulders looking too heavy for him to carry. But then he smiled, and yipped with joy, "This is so exciting! Where should we go, In-u-yash-a?"

"I don't know! And will you quit saying my name like that, ya half-baked homo!"

"Whatever you say, In-u-yash-a."

"I SAID 'STOP IT!'"

"Hee hee. Jeez, Yasha, I was only teasing. Jeez."

I groaned and rolled my eyes. Jesus, why I ever agreed to that, I don't know- I must have had something wrong with me. Maybe I wanted to get away for a while. Maybe I was so dumb that I actually believed that he would leave me alone. I never actually did stop to think about why I did that, but I suspect that I was just too bored with my house to go back there one more time.

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A/N: Inuyasha/Jakotsu really isn't that popular of a couple is it? Oh well…

Reviews are always appreciated and responded-to! Bye-bye, lovers, friends, and kindreds! I fare thee well! Gawds…